A Pirate's Charm
by The Sorrows of Arlathan
Summary: Hawke knows Isabela uses people for sex and discards them without any emotional attachment. So when the busty pirate turns her charms on her, she plays along, but keeps her at arms length. How far will Isabela go to get what she wants though? Could Hawke's family problems push her into making a decision she will regret? The game of seduction has begun, but only one can get on top.
1. Chapter 1

_Reviews welcome. I like to get feedback whether it be good or bad. Let me know what you think :) Hope you enjoy!_

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The Hanged Man was definitely the best tavern in Kirkwall, without a doubt. Although it always smelt of piss and vomit and was full of delinquents, Lana Hawke felt right at home. It reminded her of her local tavern back in Lothering, a place of peace and entertainment in equal measure complete with a mix of interesting patrons and travellers from all over Thedas. But Lothering was lost to them all now. The Blight may have been ended, but Kirkwall was Hawke's home now. Instead of listening to another argument between Gamlen and her mother, Lana frequently visited this fine Lowtown establishment, having drinks with her companions and trying desperately to ignore the mounting problems on her shoulders. It was like a battlefield in the tiny run down shack that Gamlen had so "graciously" invited them to live with him in. Granted there were a lot more fights here in The Hanged Man, but at least Hawke wasn't involved (mostly).

Lana checked her cards and took a quick glance around the table. She was sitting with Isabela, Varric, her sister Bethany and Aveline, trying to win her coin back from the busty pirate rogue who had no doubt cheated her way through every hand so far. Aveline and Bethany were terrible at cards, but Isabela and Varric won so often that Hawke was suspicious of their luck. They were sneaky buggers. Anyone who blindly trusted them was a fool, and Lana Hawke was no fool.

Bethany took a glance around the table and played her hand then.

"I win!" she shouted excitedly, checking the cards around her when the others had followed her lead. Hawke laughed.

"Not this time, Little Sister, I always save the best for last."

She flipped over her hidden card and looked up at her younger sister's face to see her reaction at having victory snatched away from her. Bethany groaned. She had only won once before and the sum was very little.

"Damn it! I thought I had you."

Varric laughed. "Bad luck, Sunshine. Hawke's the best player I've ever seen. She doesn't even need to cheat!"

Hawke chuckled. "You mean I'm stupid enough not to. I swear I would have had enough coin for the deep roads expedition before now if you and Isabela hadn't hustled me out of my hard earned sovereigns."

Isabela and Varric laughed as Hawke reached over the table and scooped her winnings into her coin purse, keeping watchful eyes on the pirate's hands. Isabela held them up in surrender.

"What are you looking at me for?" she asked with a smirk. "I'm not going to try and steal any this time. My wrist still hurts from the last time you caught me."

Hawke grinned smugly. She had caught Isabela slipping her hand into her winnings once and squeezed the rogue's wrist until she dropped the coin back onto the table.

"Touch my coin, you'll feel my wrath."

"Ooooo," Isabela swooned, her eyes travelling over Hawke's figure. Every time the woman looked at her, she could feel herself quiver. But Hawke wasn't stupid enough to go down that road. Isabela changed lovers in the blink of an eye. "I'll have to remember that."

The Rivaini winked at her before emptying the remains of her mug of whiskey into her mouth. Hawke rolled her eyes. _This game again._

"You're going to have to think of something better than that to get into my pants, Bela" she teased. Bethany and Aveline cringed as Isabela and Varric threw their heads back in laughter.

"Maker's breath, Hawke!" Aveline exclaimed, shaking her head disapprovingly. She expected it of Isabela but not of Hawke. The prudish guardwoman hated being around such crass. Hawke on the other hand, rather enjoyed Isabela's banter. At least it was better than listening to Aveline's endless complaints about her Captain. Isabela turned to her then.

"Oh, hush Big Girl. We don't need your judgmental remarks ruining our fun again."

Aveline gave her a stony look. Maker she couldn't stand the pirate rogue. "You and I have different opinions of fun, Whore."

"Really?" Isabela said mockingly. "I didn't even think you knew how to have it. All work and no play for Lady Man Hands as usual."

"Say that again and I'll put you in the brig" Aveline said angrily.

Isabela shrugged uncaringly. "I'll probably end up there by the end of the night anyway."

Hawke, Varric and Bethany laughed. Aveline looked furious, but she couldn't deny that Isabela was probably right. Arresting Isabela had become a routine part of her job, mainly for starting bar brawls in The Hanged Man. Or finishing them. Hawke saw Aveline's grip tighten around her mug, irritated once again by Isabela's company.

"I thought you were sleeping with me tonight, Isabela, not spending it chained up in the brig," Hawke joked, breaking up their squabble. "I'm disappointed now." She always tried to keep the peace between the two women whenever she could. Isabela loved winding Aveline up. The only way she could distract her was by talking about her other interest: Sex. Isabela grinned cheekily at her again.

"We can go right now if you want, sweet thing? Or why don't you come there with me and we can put those chains to good use?"

Hawke chuckled. Isabela had said the words as a joke, but there was an actual proposition there as usual. She poured them all another whiskey, avoiding answering her question. Aveline held her hand over her empty mug then, refusing a top up. She gave Hawke a disapproving glare, unhappy with her and Isabela's continuing banter.

"You two have no shame," Bethany said, giggling along with Varric. She took the drink Hawke handed her reluctantly. "I think this will be my last."

"Oh come on, Sunshine!" Varric said. "We still have another bottle to go and Isabela has a friend she was going to introduce to you."

"Oh yes!" Isabela said as though just having remembered. She put her left arm around Bethany's shoulder and pointed with her right. "He's right over-"

Hawke grabbed Isabela's outstretched hand and flattened it to the table. "You're not setting my younger sister up with some idiot from The Hanged Man," she said firmly.

Bethany looked relieved. She'd never been with a man before and always got quite nervous when Isabela started to coax her. Isabela and Varric laughed at the serious look on Hawke's face.

"I was only kidding, Hawke. Bethany's too good for anyone in here," Isabela said. She pulled her hand out from under Hawke's and ran it up Hawke's arm, flirtatiously. "You, on the other hand...aren't as innocent as your sister." The pirate captain got to her feet, leaning seductively over the table, her face hovering in front of Hawke's, slowly leaning in for a kiss. Hawke rose to her movements played along, moving her head towards Isabela's. Just as their lips almost touched, she dodged at the last second and moved her lips to Isabela's ear.

"Nice try, Bela" she whispered smugly. Isabela fell back into her chair in defeat as Varric and Bethany burst out laughing. It was their favourite form of entertainment watching Isabela try and seduce Hawke. Lana was the only one who seemed to be able to withstand Isabela's charms and she was sure that the others were wondering how long she could keep it up, just as she was. Good choice or not, there was no denying the Rivaini's sex appeal, or her cunning wit.

"Ooo, you're such a tease," Isabela said, chuckling herself. Even though she always got rejected, she loved trying to entice the woman. It was becoming like a hobby.

"She's beating you at your own game, Rivaini," Varric said, shaking his head in mock disappointment. Normally Isabela was the one in control. That was how she liked it. Hawke was taking her for a different sort of ride though, and it rather intrigued her.

"Oh, I'll win in the end Varric." Isabela answered confidently, not taking her eyes of Hawke. "Sooner or later I always manage to get on top_."_

Hawke and Varric chuckled, grasping her meaning. Bethany looked confused.

"I don't get it," she said.

"Oh, don't worry your pretty little head about it, Bethany" Isabela said, patting her sympathetically on the shoulder. "I'll get you a night at The Blooming Rose sometime." She glanced at Hawke for her reaction.

"Over my dead body," Hawke said seriously.

"Oh Hawke, don't be so selfish. I'm pretty sure I've seen you there before," Isabela replied jokingly.

Hawke laughed. "Only when I was going in to get _you_ out!"

All of them at the table, bar Aveline, laughed. She sighed and got to her feet, finally having had her fill of their antics.

"I have to get back to the barracks. My shift starts soon," she declared.

"I thought you had a night off!" Hawke said, looking up at her confused.

"I did," Aveline replied. "But I decided I would rather work than have to listen to tales of Isabela's sexual exploits."

Isabela turned to her. "Maybe you should stay, Big Girl. You might learn something."

Hawke tried not to laugh. Aveline threw Isabela a dirty look before walking away. "See you, Hawke...Bethany."

"Good night," they called after her. Aveline could rarely stomach the conversations Hawke and the others had with Isabela. They were a bit too crude for her. Tonight though, they had behaved as best they could. Hawke watched her as she stormed out of The Hanged Man, slamming the heavy door behind her.

"Oh, she definitely needs a good seeing to," Isabela exclaimed. "Bent over backwards and hammered like a bent nail."

The three of them laughed. "Well what are you waiting for, Bela?" Hawke asked. "I bet she's right up your street."

"Ha!" Isabela exclaimed. "Not even if you paid me...well, maybe." Varric and Bethany snorted into their drinks. "I don't imagine she would be very good though...She doesn't have your kind of..._talents_._"_

"And how would you know of my talents?" Hawke asked, here eyes twinkling. So they were back to their games again? Isabela smirked knowingly.

"Call it female intuition."

"Well it isn't working tonight." Hawke said. Her attentions were then distracted by a group of men who had walked into the tavern. She recognised a few of their faces, "Shit, look who's here."

Isabela turned her head, following Hawke's gaze. "Oh, balls!" She turned back. "You should go Hawke. He'll pester you too if he sees you with me."

"Let him try!" Hawke said. Bethany touched Hawke's arm.

"Maybe we should go, Sister. Mother will be wondering where we are," She said. Bethany hated bar brawls. Mainly as she had no way to defend herself because using magic would expose herself as an apostate. Hawke seemed to be thinking along the same lines.

"Alright," she relented. "I'll see you both tomorrow."

She knocked back the rest of her whiskey and she and Bethany stood up.

"See you, Hawke," Varric said. "You can win your coin back some other time."

Hawke smiled. "I was on a roll too. I'm starting to think it's no coincidence that those men are here. Maybe that was your plan all along."

Varric and Isabela laughed. As Hawke went to walk away Isabela grabbed her arm.

"Come back later," she said, giving her a sly smile, "We can have some fun."

Hawke chuckled. "Goodbye Isabela," she said pointedly. Isabela sat back down in mock disappointment.

"Fine," she said, folding her arms and leaning back on her chair, "You can't resist me forever, Hawke," she called after her as Lana and Bethany made their way towards the door.

"I can try!" Hawke called back. She heard Varric chuckle before the door to The Hanged Man closed behind them. The cool breeze gave the two sister's chills as they walked the short distance back to Uncle Gamlen's house near the Alienage. The sound of some whore plying her trade in a back alley could be heard some where in the distance. Bethany made a face.

"I don't like Lowtown," she said, eying the crumbling buildings with dislike. "I really hope Mother gets the estate in Hightown back. I can't bear the though of living with Uncle Gamlen any longer."

Hawke nodded in agreement. "I hope they've stopped arguing by now."

As they reached the door to Gamlen's hovel, raised voices could be heard from inside. They were still at each others throats. Hawke and Bethany looked at each other in disappointment, bracing themselves before opening the door.

"I'm still their daughter!" Leandra was shouting. "And I'm still your sister, as much as I hate to admit it right now!"

"Then what are you still doing here?" Gamlen yelled back. "I was perfectly happy before you and your lot came along."

"Perfectly happy spending all of my inheritance you mean!"

Hawke led Bethany past them and into the bedroom. Her poor sister had enough on her plate, worrying about Templar trouble. At least once, Hawke would like to bring her home to some peace and quiet. But that was hard to come by these days. Leandra and Gamlen barely even noticed them enter the house, still engrossed in their argument. Hawke followed Bethany to the single bed that they had to share with each other. The sheets were moth eaten and frayed at the ends and the pillow was nothing more than an empty sack with a few feathers. Bethany undressed and climbed in. Hawke sat on the edge and leaned on her knees with her elbows, holding her head in her hands as she tried to block out the noise.

"I can't take much more of this," she said, her voice muffled slightly. The strain she was trying so hard to conceal was apparent in her tone. This didn't go unnoticed by her little sister. Bethany straightened up and placed a comforting hand on Hawke's back.

"Don't worry, Lana," she said quietly. "We've almost got enough coin for Bartrand's expedition. We'll be out of here soon."

Hawke turned to her. Bethany was so innocent. Sometimes Hawke forgot that she was only 19. As she stared into her brown eyes though, she didn't have the heart to tell her that it wouldn't be that simple. What was the point in ruining the only thing they had to look forward to?

"I know," she agreed. "I just wish I could get a moment's peace from all the yelling."

She stood up and walked over to throw water over her face. Bethany watched her go. She felt sorry for her sister. Lana had a lot of responsibility on her shoulders. She was tough, but Bethany knew that the pressure was becoming too much for her. That, plus Carver's death, would have crippled any lesser being. Lana slept little, and Bethany knew that it wasn't just because the bed was so bloody uncomfortable. She had a lot on her mind. A younger sister, a grieving mother, and Bethany knew that Lana blamed herself for Carver's death. She would have done even if their mother hadn't screamed it at her as she held her only son in her arms as he lay dead. Then there was that toad Uncle Gamlen. He had already stolen coin from them a few times. Bethany remembered the row Lana had with him when she found out he had taken the money she had hidden under the bed for the Bartrand's expedition. She had almost killed him.

Hawke walked back to the bed and climbed in. There was barely any room for them to move in the tiny bunk. She and Bethany lay on their backs, staring up at the bunk above theirs where their mother slept.

"Isabela likes you," Bethany said suddenly. Hawke turned to glance at her and then chuckled.

"Isabela likes anything with a pulse," she replied. Bethany laughed.

"True," she said. "Can you believe she's slept with women?"

Hawke shrugged. "So what?" she replied. "It's not like it's unheard of."

"I know, but...why would you want to? I mean, how would you...?"

Hawke couldn't hold back her laugh. "Thinking of taking a woman to your bed, Sister?" she joked.

Bethany laughed with her. "No!" she said, defensively. "I was just curious...that's all."

"Well, why don't you ask Isabela sometime? I'm sure she wouldn't mind giving you a few pointers. She talks about sex often enough."

"Does she?" Bethany asked. Hawke rolled her eyes.

"You really don't get her jokes do you?" she laughed. "Maker's breath Bethany, there's a sexual innuendo hidden in almost everything the woman says!"

"Oh!"Bethany said. She thought back to all the moments when Lana, Varric and Isabela were giggling at something Isabela had said and she and Merril were confused. "Well, I'll have to listen out for them next time. I don't know how she does it though..."

"Does what?" Hawke asked.

"Sleeps with women!" Bethany said, surprised Lana hadn't understood. "I would never...well at least, I don't think I would. I mean...would you...ever...?"

Hawke stayed silent. There was a lot her sister didn't know. They weren't ones to keep secrets from each other but the conversation simply had never come up before. She hesitated.

"Let's...just...go to sleep," she said, turning onto her side. She felt the bed shake as Bethany jumped up beside her and could feel her sister's curious eyes on her.

"Lana?...What... you mean-?"

"I'm tired Bethany," Hawke interrupted loudly. "Lie down and go to sleep. We have a long day tomorrow."

After several seconds she felt Bethany flop back down beside her. She could practically hear her little sister's mind ticking over, trying to piece things together. Hawke wrapped her half of the skinny sheet around her and stared at the wall. She hasn't expected for Bethany to ask her straight up about her thoughts on sleeping with women. Her sister wouldn't mind if she told her but it was an awkward situation. After all, Bethany had known the woman back in Lothering she had slept with. And she wasn't just any woman. Hawke didn't know how she would react when she found out. Neither Lana nor the woman had planned on telling anyone as it wasn't exactly permitted. But now Isabela's sexual experiences had landed Hawke in a difficult position. _Damn her for putting ideas into my little sister's head! _

Hawke rolled over and lay on her back, closing her eyes. Knowing she wouldn't be able to sleep, she let her thoughts wander back to what had occurred in Lothering, three years ago...


	2. Chapter 2

It was a warm, sunny day in Lothering, rays of gold overlooking the small slightly dilapidated town, accentuating their every nook and cranny. Lana loved it here. It felt more like home to her than anywhere her mother and father had fled to in the past. Lothering was peaceful, calm, away from all the bustle of the industrial cities like Denerim. It was endearing and welcoming and the best place to find gossip in all of Ferelden, given its position on the main Highway linking both sides of the country together. If there was one thing Lana could change about it though, it would be the number of Templars. They were every where, spread throughout the city like a virus, routing out apostates wherever they lurked.

Of course one apostate had thankfully stayed under their radar. Bethany Hawke lived on the outskirts of Lothering with her family and had so far successfully eluded the Templars gaze. Lana couldn't help but feel as though that was about to change though. Her little sister was playing with fire. It would only be a matter of time before she got burnt. Lana couldn't help but get angry at her for the danger she was placing them all in. An apostate running loose in the town, that was one thing. But an apostate hanging around the Chantry, making friends with Chantry sisters, that was another. Sixteen years old and she still didn't have any sense. Lana was frustrated. Their mother worried frantically about her daughter when she left on days like this to visit a so called Chantry Sister. For that reason she had sent Lana, the eldest of the family, to pick her up and bring her home after every visit to go and hear this Sister's stories and songs.

Lana couldn't make sense of it herself. Sure, stories were interesting sometimes, and songs? Well why not? Still, it wasn't something to risk your freedom over, or your life. Lana preferred to wait out the time in Lothering's 'fine' establishment on the edge of town and have a few drinks with various friends while she waited for Bethany to finish. Today though, Leandra her mother had ordered her to go directly to the Chantry and pick Bethany up, scolding her after she found out Lana had been drinking and having fun instead of watching over her younger sibling as she walked into the lion's den. Today would be the first time Hawke would meet this Sister, and of course she was very excited (not!).

Lana loved religious people...when they weren't preaching, singing the Chant, damning others into oblivion, or asking people to donate coin. So, in other words, she absolutely _loathed_ them. Why should this Sister be any different from the numerous other drab Sisters of the cloister? The only thing Lana thought was endearing about them was that they were all chaste and virtuous. Forbidden fruits were sweeter than most...but still forbidden. Even so, a girl could dream right? Each time Lana's mother had dragged her to the Chantry to keep up their charade of avid Chantry-goers with nothing to hide, she would simply let her mind wander after spotting a lovely young initiate who had caught her eye. Today, she would meet another one, but whether she would be lovely remained to be seen.

Lana turned the corner and entered the Chantry courtyard. As usual there were Templars stationed on either side of the doorway, each giving off the same vibe: no one goes in or out without our permission. Even though Lana was no mage herself, she always got shivers when she walked past them. It was as though she anticipated they would somehow find out her family's dark secret and prosecute them all for it, sending Bethany to the Circle of Magi while doing Maker knows what with the rest of them. They could try all they wanted though. Lana would give her life to keep her sister out of the Chantry's grasp. They had already lost their father Malcolm. Hawke wouldn't let anything else tear them apart.

Lana pushed open the Chantry doors and entered the so-called sanctuary. Funny how all she ever smelt when inside Chantry buildings was the stench of repression. If this was classed as a sanctuary, she would rather spend her days in prison. At least the motive of a prison was clear. You were there because you had messed up. It didn't hide under the pretext of redemption like the Chantry did. Making her way up the aisle, Lana scanned the large hall for any sign of her sister Bethany. _Maker where is she? _The cool chills that crept up on her in the Chantry were unsettling and she could never wait to leave. Suddenly she heard the sound of a familiar baritone coming from the side door of the building which led to the Chantry Gardens. Curious, Lana followed the sound and soon she spotted Bethany walking across the grounds, a red-headed woman in Chantry robes strolling along beside her, speaking fluently as though telling a story. She could hear her sister's laughter at her words. Lana made her way towards them.

"I see you're having fun, Little Sister," she said as she approached. Bethany and the Chantry Sister turned to meet her as she walked across the garden path to where they stood.

"Lana? What are you doing here?" Bethany asked, surprised her sister had dragged herself away from the tavern and walked voluntarily into the Chantry. Lana threw her a pointed smile.

"I'm here to...make sure you're alright, remember?" she said, tossing a glance in the red-headed Sister's direction, referring to the promise she had made their mother about keeping her safe. Bethany smiled back, grasping her meaning.

"I'm fine," she said cheerfully. The only good thing Lana could say about her sister's weekly Chantry visits was that she always seemed so happy afterwards. "This," Bethany continued, gesturing to the woman on her right, "Is Sister Leliana. Leliana this is my older sister, Lana."

"It's so nice to finally meet you, Lana," Leliana said, holding out her hand. "Bethany has told me so much about you."Lana grasped it, immediately becoming entranced by the woman's smooth accent. It sounded Orlesian, but very delicate, captivating. She could instantly see why Bethany kept returning here to hear the woman's stories. Lana could have listened to her speak all day and she had only heard her say a few words so far.

"Charmed," Lana replied, keeping her face straight. _I think that's the first time I've said _that_ to a Chantry Sister._ There was something about this woman that was...No. She is still part of the Chantry. That alone made Lana reluctant to return her smile."I hope my sister hasn't been giving away all my secrets."

Sister Leliana chuckled. "Of course not, in fact she was just telling me how much she idolised you. Now that I've met you, I can see why."

Lana smiled uncertainly then, her eyebrows coming together slightly. She had a sneaking suspicion that this Sister was not as innocent as she wanted people to believe. Subtle or not, Lana was certain she had just flirted with her a little.

"Is that so?" Hawke asked, her eyes twinkling, "Well maybe I should have stayed at the tavern then. I obviously don't give off an accurate first impression,"

Bethany and the Sister giggled. "Oh I doubt that," Leliana said. "On the other hand, I am eager to see what I have apparently missed out on. Maybe I could join you there later?"

This time it was Lana's turn to chuckle. Sister Leliana was _not_ just some mere cloistered Sister. A silver tongue like that was a gift that came with charm and class, all of which this women had in abundance. Lana found herself intrigued. Bethany was staring from Lana to Leliana in confusion, not fully understanding why there were both eyeing each other like a spider eyeing a fly. Truth be told, Lana didn't understand it either. This Sister was very hard for her to read.

"That would be..._interesting_," Lana answered carefully, "I didn't know Chantry Sister's even knew where the tavern was."

Bethany threw her sister a look of warning, hearing the mocking tone Lana used which some construed as rude. Sister Leliana began to laugh however, untroubled by Lana's jibe and ran her slender fingers through her short red hair, flicking it lightly from her face. "I was not always a cloistered Sister, you know. And I think I can find my way there from here. Let's say...seven?"

Lana bit her lip, considering the invitation. She could see this Sister's need for...an escape maybe? And she had to admit that the woman had peaked her interest. But her mother wouldn't be pleased if she was caught having drinks with a member of the Chantry. Maker only knew what she would let slip. Lana's mother didn't trust her judgment when she was drunk and she certainly wouldn't want both her daughters frolicking with Chantry members, however nice they seemed to be.

"I...that sounds appealing, Sister, but I think I will have to decline," Lana said carefully, "I'm busy tonight. I won't be able to make it to the tavern." She saw Sister Leliana's face fall slightly. She couldn't tell whether or not the woman knew it was a lie.

"I understand. Maybe some other time?" she asked hopefully. Lana hesitated. She could see Bethany stare at her worriedly, knowing what she was thinking.

"Maybe," she replied, trying to sound more apologetic than rejecting.

After several seconds Sister Leliana nodded. "Of course," she said, sounding a little sad. "Well I must return to the cloister. The Revered Mother will be wondering where I am."

"Aww," Bethany groaned, "Will I see you tomorrow?"

Leliana smiled, "Hmm," she said, "We'll see, pretty." She reached out and touched Bethany's cheek affectionately. Bethany smiled back at her. The Sister turned to Lana then. "It was very nice to meet you, Lana. Hopefully I will see you again soon?"

She ended her sentence on a high note as though expecting an answer. Lana, not knowing how to respond, simply nodded and smiled.

"And you don't have to worry about your sister when she is with me," Leliana added, "I'll look after her."

Bethany smiled at the Sister in admiration. It was clear that even though she was a mage she felt comfortable around her. Lana couldn't wait to leave though. She felt as though everything she said had the potential to blow up in her face. She forced herself to smile once more at the Chantry Sister's declaration of protection. Leliana then said her final goodbyes to Bethany and made her way inside. Lana reached out and took her little sister's hand, leading her hurriedly out of the Chantry Gardens. The two Hawke's then began the long walk back home.

Hawke could hear Bethany hum a song under her breath and she could guess that it was probably one Leliana had taught her. She had to admit she herself was intrigued by this woman. Never before had she believed a Chantry Sister would have the gall to ask her out to the tavern. And never before did she think she would ever consider accepting. Something about this woman was mysterious and Lana found herself wanting to discover what it was. She knew there was no way she could meet her though. The Hawke family already spent enough time around Templars and Sisters as it was. Any more time and they might as well join.

"So, what stories did Leliana tell you today?" Lana asked as they walked through the mountain pass which led to their little home on the outskirts of town.

"Oh, the usual, tales of Orlais, her time as a minstrel. Did you know that in Orlais the women wear shoes with delicate tapered heels?"

Lana shook her head, "I didn't. They sound quite hard to walk in though don't they? So that's where this Sister's from then, Orlais?"

Bethany nodded, "I think so. She has the accent and she talks about Orlais often enough. It sounds wonderful, Lana. I would love to see it."

Hawke smiled and put her arm around her little sister's shoulder. "Well, maybe we'll go sometime," she said. Bethany looked up at her excitedly.

"Really?"

Lana nodded, "We'll see. I'll talk to Mother about it."

Bethany smiled her cute little smile, her big brown eyes full of hope and eagerness. Then she wrapped her arm around her eldest sister's waist as they walked back home together.

That night Lana had agreed to meet a friend of hers at the Lothering tavern. She dawned her prettiest looking dress and applied some of her mother's make up, spending a few hours in front of the mirror putting it on. Bethany was eager to help so Lana let her style her hair, using heated tongs to straighten it. It was hard to do it yourself without burning your hand and her little sister had an eye for that soft of thing.

"Who are you meeting?" Bethany asked as she flattened the last few bits of Lana's dark brown hair.

"Umm...no one," Lana replied, avoiding her eyes.

"No one?" Bethany repeated sceptically, "Am I to believe you're going to all this effort to drink alone?"

Lana sighed, "Ok," she relented, "I'm meeting...Allison."

"Allison? As in my friend Allison?" Bethany asked confused. Lana nodded, still not looking at her.

"Well why didn't you tell me?" she asked, "I could have come."

"No!" Lana blurted out, getting to her feet instantly, "I mean, you could have but...Mother needs your help," she finished weakly, hoping Bethany wouldn't force the issue. Her sister sighed in disappointment. Hawke hated deceiving her like this but tonight was meant to be a private dinner between her and Allison. They had been flirting with each other none stop and tonight was supposed to be...well, a good night. She couldn't have her younger sister along as an unknowing third wheel.

"I'll tell her you said hello," Hawke said. She kissed her sister on the cheek in thanks and patted her arm before leaving the house.

"Don't be late!" Her mother called after her.

"I won't!" Lana replied over her shoulder.

* * *

The dinner with Allison was excruciating. The woman jumped every time someone in the tavern spoke too loudly, so much that she had gotten more wine over Lana's dress than in her mouth. Lana knew the woman was nervous but this was just taking the piss. She was regretting this the longer it went on. They hadn't even made it through the first course yet.

"I'm so sorry!" Allison exclaimed for what seemed like the fifteenth time. She reached for another napkin from the table and made to blot the red wine from the front of Hawke's dress. Funny how she always managed to spill it over her breasts. It was a little too often to be a coincidence. Lana grabbed the cloth from her, frustration getting the better of her now.

"I got it!" she snapped, before Allison could rub her hand along her again. Hawke had a feeling the woman was doing it on purpose. The last time she had scrubbed the stain there so hard that she thought her nipple was about to get sanded off. She could feel her temper rising at the sad attempts Allison was using a pretext for touching. Maker's breath, what ever happened to holding someone's hand across the table or running your foot seductively up their leg underneath it? Allison looked taken aback at Lana's rudeness and her face fell. This date clearly hadn't gone as planned.

"I'm sorry," she said again as Lana gently soaked up more red wine from the neckline of her dress.

"Please stop apologising!" Hawke replied irritated. _Maker's breath if the woman says 'I'm sorry' one more time I'm going to throttle her! _She sighed angrily as she took in the massive stains on her best dress. They were never coming out now. She could feel Allison watching her, wondering what to do next. All of a sudden the woman lunged. Hawke looked up in horror as Allison threw herself across the space between them and kissed her full on the lips.

After several seconds of shock Lana put her hands on Allison's shoulders pushing her away. She stared at her open mouthed.

"I'm sorry!" Allison said embarrassed, "Was that not ok?"

Lana held up her hands protectively and tried to just process what had just happened. After several seconds she was still lost for words. Sure, that would have been ok, on say, a successful date. Was there any part in Allison's mind which had thought this had gone well? Lana shook her head to bring her back to her senses.

"I'm...um...I think I'm going to go get another drink," she said, getting to her feet. She walked to the bar quickly before Allison could offer to help her. Hawke squeezed between the patrons and leaned over the counter, still trying to process Allison's kiss. Maker's Breath! The woman had absolutely no tact. She had no idea how to enact intimacy without spilling wine over someone's dress. It was so cliché. Lana felt like vomiting. Originally she had been attracted to Allison and was looking for a good time. Now though, she was just looking for an escape.

And then it came.

"So...you weren't so busy after all then."

Lana spun around. To her complete amazement, there standing in front of her, was Sister Leliana. Hawke's mouth fell open. She was lost for words and suddenly became aware of her wine stained dress. The Chantry Sister was smirking at her, waiting for her to save the obvious lie she had told her earlier that day.

"I...," Lana stuttered.

Leliana raised her eyebrows. "Yes...?" She seemed to be enjoying watching Hawke, who seemed to have forgotten how to speak.

"I _was_ busy," Hawke finally said, "I mean...I _am_ busy."

Leliana chuckled and then took in Hawke's ruined dress, her eyes lingering particularly on the most recent stain along her breasts which were still glistening with wetness. Hawke was sure it was becoming almost see-through.

"I...can see that," she replied, trying to contain her laugh. "Are you...having some trouble?"

Just then Allison closed in. Sister Leliana and Hawke turned to look at her as Allison pushed her way in between them both and wrapped her arms around a bewildered Hawke's waist.

"There you are Lana!" she said, trying to wiggle her way in between them, "I was wondering where you had got to, sweetie."

Hawke cringed. _Sweetie? _Then, realising Sister Leliana was staring at her expectantly she reluctantly wrapped her free arm around Allison's shoulder and tried to smile as though she was having a wonderful night.

"Nope, no trouble" she replied to Leliana's question. The Sister threw her a skeptic smile, glancing at Allison as though asking '_Really?Her?' _Lana tried her best to keep a smile on her face as though she couldn't see anything wrong with the woman who was desperately clinging to her. Suddenly Allison began to laugh mockingly.

"What are you doing speaking to a Chantry Sister, Hawke?" she asked, making a face. "I thought you were interesting at least."

Sister Leliana exhaled, clearly offended.

"Allison this is-"

"Yeah, I don't care!" she interrupted rudely, giving Sister Leliana a look of disgust, "I don't like Chantry preachers...and why am I explaining this to you Lana? You hate Chantry folk more than anyone I know!"

Hawke cringed. _Maker, Allison is on a roll tonight! _Before Hawke could reply Allison had dragged her back to their table, barging past Leliana in the process. Lana glanced back at her, regretfully. The Sister had taken a vacated stool by the bar on her own. Hawke couldn't help but notice how sad she looked. It was an odd sight to see on the face of the normally cheerful, charming woman who her sister had so often spoke about.

Suddenly Allison's lips claimed Hawke's attention again. Her hands clasped onto either side of Hawke's face and turned her towards her as she tried to create some passion between them. Lana could feel her untrained tongue try to force its way into her reluctant mouth and pushed her back again, feeling like she was going to be sick.

"Andraste's ass!" she exclaimed, wiping the saliva from her mouth.

"What's your problem, Hawke? I thought this was what you wanted!" Allison asked, looking offended now.

"It is!" Hawke replied, "But I had planned on getting through dinner without you covering me in wine and sticking your tongue down my throat every chance you get."

Allison looked angry. "Fine then," she said, "Let's talk about something instead."

Hawke listened as Allison jumped into some story about her family's basement being infested with rats. She drank her wine, waiting on their second course to arrive, pretending to be interested in the woman beside her. To be honest though, Lana was loosing interest by the second. Her eyes kept glancing up at the Chantry Sister who was sitting alone, nursing a goblet of red wine. She just looked so lonely. Everyone in the tavern seemed to be avoiding her because of the Chantry robe. It almost screamed out "I am a bore" to them all. A few times Hawke watched as men approached her, becoming entranced by her pretty face and curves, before walking the other way as soon as their eyes caught her robe. Sister Leliana seemed oblivious to it though. She sipped her wine slowly, her eyes pouring over a book the bartender had left for her.

"Hawke are you even listening to me?"

Allison's annoying voice pulled Lana back from her thoughts. She turned back to her date and smiled as best she could.

"Of course, please continue."

By the time the meal had come, Hawke had lost her appetite. She truthfully wanted nothing more than to leave. To be honest, her desire for sex at the start of this night had completely evaporated thanks to Allison. Unable to take any more Lana excused her self and walked to the water closet. Sister Leliana was gone she noticed, as she walked past where the woman had been sitting. In her place sat a few men from Redcliffe whom Hawke had met on occasion. She nodded kindly to them and then went to relieve herself in the ladies room, taking as long as possible.

As Lana made her way reluctantly back to her and Allison's table a hand suddenly reached out and grabbed her arm. She turned surprised, expecting a fight, which would have normally been the case. Her anger evaporated immediately as she saw who had touched her. Sister Leliana had not left at all. She had simply moved herself to a small rickety table for two, which was hidden from most of the tavern.

"So, are you still busy?" she teased. Lana stared down at her. She was sitting with her legs crossed, a small book lay face down on the table in front of her, opened at a page. Her goblet of wine was empty. Hawke stepped back out of her touch. It had sent shivers up her spine.

"I am," she replied firmly. The Sister stared at her curiously.

"With Allison?" she asked with a smirk, "I got the feeling she wasn't exactly your type."

"She's more my type than you are," Lana replied coldly, gesturing to her Chantry robe. This whole night had been a disaster. The last thing she needed was a Chantry Sister making fun of her. The Sister's face fell at her harsh words.

"I'm more than just a robe, Lana," she said sadly. "I am a person too."

"Not to me," Hawke replied firmly. "I have no interest in Chantry Sisters...or The Maker himself for that matter. They have both caused me nothing but trouble. My life is better off without either of them in it. Good night, Sister."

Hawke went to walk away. Before she could Sister Leliana got to her feet. She reached out and grabbed Hawke's hand this time. Lana looked down, seeing Leliana's soft fingers intertwined in her own. She realised the woman was only a few inches from her. Reluctantly Lana looked up, meeting the Sister's blue eyes.

"Give me a chance," Leliana pled softly, "I am not like the others."

Just then Allison appeared again. She saw Hawke's hand in Leliana's and gave the Chantry Sister a look of fury, seeing how close they were.

"What do you think you're doing?" she demanded confused. Hawke jumped as Allison's voice screamed in her ear. She pulled her hand from Leliana's and stepped back. Before she could reject, Allison took her hand in her own calloused ones, holding her tightly as though she belonged to her.

"You need to stop interrupting us, _Sister!"_ She said to Leliana spitefully. The Sister apologised then. She threw Hawke a momentary glance before returning to her seat defeated. Hawke was torn. Should she give this woman a chance, or return to her disastrous date with Allison? As the annoying woman tried to press her lips against hers once more, Hawke realised she'd had enough. Allison had had her chance. Hawke pulled back and tore her hand from Allison's claw.

"Our dates over, Allison," she said firmly. Sister Leliana looked up in surprise. Allison looked confused and a little hurt.

"What?" she exclaimed as though having misheard what she said.

"Oh come on!" Hawke blurted out before she could stop herself. "I mean, did you actually think this date was going well! Look at the state of my dress! I smell like the inside of a wine cask!"

"I already said-"

"Sorry?" Hawke interrupted. "Yes you're right Allison. In fact to my knowledge you said "Sorry" about fifty times tonight. It has been driving me up the bloody walls!"

Allison looked stunned. She opened her mouth and closed it as though trying to think of something hurtful to say back.

"I...You know what? Screw you, Lana! It's your loss. Spend the rest of your night with this Chantry virgin! We're finished!" she screamed. She turned away and walked towards the door slowly as though expecting Lana to follow and call her back. Hawke wasn't looking at Allison any more though. Suddenly, she became captivated by Sister Leliana's piercing blue eyes. Her mind was made up.

"Alright," Lana said to her. "My night seems to have gotten a bit less busy. You have your chance, Sister."

Leliana smiled, looking happier than she had done all night.

"Thank you," she said graciously. She gestured to the chair opposite hers to Hawke who accepted. "Would you like some wine?"

Hawke looked down at her dress then. She saw a small smile playing on the corner of the Sister's mouth as her eyes travelled over the red stains once more. The offer had been genuine but she was sure there was a joke there somewhere too.

"Please," Hawke said gratefully. "It's been a very long night."

Leliana gestured to the bartender for two more wines. Both woman stared at each other across the table. Hawke was glad it was in a more private location. What would the people say if they say her sitting with a Chantry Sister?

"So..." Leliana began, "That was a...date, was it?"

"A catastrophic one," Hawke corrected. This seemed to please Leliana.

"Bethany... never told me you were interested in women," she said curiously. Lana shrugged, unable to ignore how attractive this Chantry Sister before her was.

"She doesn't know," she replied, throwing a cheeky grin before raising her goblet of wine to her lips. Sister Leliana chuckled. They observed each other for several seconds, each trying to figure the other out.

"Why do you want to be my friend so badly?" Lana asked suddenly. Leliana had gone out of her way more than once tonight to try and speak to her. It made Hawke suspicious. No one ever showed this much interest without an ulterior motive, and it usually involved her family. Leliana dropped her gaze and tilted her head to the side, shrugging slightly.

"I don't know," she said, staring into her goblet of wine. "There's just...something about you, Lana. I find myself drawn to you."

"But you're a Chantry Sister," Lana replied confused.

"I'm a Lay-Sister," Leliana corrected. Lana became even more confused. "It means I didn't take vows," she added. "I came to the Chantry seeking safe harbour a few months ago and... after the storm passed, I just did not want to leave."

Hawke was surprised at this sudden revelation. "Safe harbour from what?" she asked. Leliana looked up at her and hesitated. Lana could see pain in her eyes.

"Let's just say I had plenty of reasons to join the Chantry...and leave it at that," she answered sadly. Hawke could tell she was hiding something but let it drop. It wasn't any of her business. They both had secrets after all.

"I must admit, you are the first Chantry Sister I have seen in the tavern," Lana said. "I was surprised earlier today when you invited me."

Leliana chuckled. "Yes, your sarcastic little comment said as much."

Lana cringed, "I apologise if I was rude," she said, "My sarcasm sometimes gets misread."

Leliana laughed again and shook her head, "Don't worry. I enjoy a bit of banter. Life in the Chantry can be so dull sometimes."

Lana nodded in agreement. "I try to stay away from it a much as possible. The tavern is one of the only places I can come to get away from Chantry goers."

"Is that why you lied to me then?" Leliana asked. "To keep me away from your tavern?" Hawke's jaw tightened. She had a feeling this would come up again.

"No," she replied truthfully, "I lied because I didn't want to offend you, and I declined your invitation because I have no interest in anyone who is part of the Chantry."

Hawke's words seemed to hurt Leliana. "I understand," she replied sadly. Lana shook her head and got to her feet then, realising she was contradicting herself by even being here with her.

"Maybe this was a bad idea," she said, wishing she hadn't of sat down now. As she went to walk away Sister Leliana got to her feet and grabbed Hawke's hand again. She made her way around the small table, until she was standing in front of her.

"I once felt the same you know," Leliana said, staring into her eyes, "About Chantry folk. I did some unspeakable things against the order, believing myself different from them. But then I found myself here and realised...we are not all the same, Lana."

"And exactly how are you different from the others?" Hawke asked sceptically. She had heard these words before but nothing ever proved otherwise. Leliana looked up at her, her blue eyes darting back and forth at each of Lana's brown ones. Suddenly she leaned in closer and slowly placed her lips on Lana's, bringing her other hand to her face and caressing it gently. Hawke was too stunned to respond. She had already been kissed a few times tonight against her will but this was different. Instead of retreating, she felt herself respond, opening her mouth a little wider as Sister Leliana's tongue ran along her lips asking permission. Hawke brought her hand up to Leliana's cheek, her other still held in the Sister's hand. As wrong as this felt, Lana couldn't pull back if she tried. The two women kissed passionately, hidden from the rest of the goings-on in the tavern around them.

After several irresistible minutes, Leliana stopped. She rested her head against Lana's, her eyes closed. Both of them were exhaling heavier than usual, feeling the warmth of the others breath on their face. Hawke couldn't believe what had just happened. That was possibly the most intoxicating kiss of her life. And definitely the most forbidden. She ran her hand along Leliana's cheek, neck and then down along her arm. The woman didn't move, still resting her face against Lana's.

"I shouldn't have done that," she whispered. Lana pulled back then and took the Sister's face in her hands, staring deeply into her eyes. Leliana reluctantly looked at her. Hawke could see tears build in the Sister's eyes at her betrayal of the Chantry.

"Why did you then?" Lana asked gently. She could see the woman fighting with her conflicting thoughts and feelings.

"I wasn't born in the Chantry, Lana," she said softly, "As much as I try to tell myself I am a part of it I just feel..."

Hawke's eyebrows narrowed. That same empty look appeared in Sister Leliana's eyes once more. She tore her gaze from Hawke's, avoiding her questioning stare.

"Lonely?" Lana finished. Leliana's eyes flicked towards hers again and Hawke saw the truth. Sister Leliana nodded as best as she could with Hawke's hands holding her face. Hawke then ran her fingers through Leliana's red hair affectionately, brushing it from her beautiful pale face.

"Then what do you want to do?" she asked in a whisper. Leliana stared at her for several seconds, considering. Then she leaned in and placing her lips on Hawke's once more. Lana kissed her back eagerly, a soft groan of pleasure escaping her lips as the Sister bit down hard on her bottom lip. Their bodies pressed together, their bosom's heaving as they passionately lost themselves in the moment. Hawke felt the Chantry Sister's hand travel down her body, along her curves, cupping her pointed breast before running down along her abdomen towards her navel, and then continuing further. As she felt the woman's slender fingers rub her throbbing womanhood through her dress, Lana suddenly came back to her senses, realising they were still in the crowded tavern.

"Wait!" she said, after pulling her lips reluctantly away from Sister Leliana's. Leliana pulled back as well, her impatience having gotten the better of her. "Not here," Hawke continued, "Let's go somewhere quieter."

"That's probably best," Leliana agreed, running her hands through her tussled hair to flatten it. They had both got completely caught up in the moment and forgot who and where they were. A Chantry Sister having sex with a Hawke woman in the middle of a tavern would bring them both unwanted attention. They both finished their wine quickly and left a few coins on the table in payment, before exiting the tavern together.

The night was bitterly cold, especially to Lana who was only wearing a thin dress. Leliana, on the other hand, was in a thick Chantry robe. Seeing Lana shiver, she placed an arm around her shoulder, drawing her close as they made their way through towards the outskirts of Lothering. Hawke place her arm around the Sister's waist, stealing some of her body heat.

"Where are we going?" she asked, realising she was following Leliana. The Sister chuckled.

"I know a place," she answered.

Leliana led them towards the bridge before pointing east to the windmill in the distance. Lana looked at her surprised.

"There?" she asked incredulously.

"Trust me," Leliana replied, winking at her.

The two of them made their way towards it. As soon as they were far enough away from the main part of town, Lana reached down and took Leliana's hand. She began to run with her towards the windmill, feeling the cool breeze burn her lungs. Leliana chuckled, allowing herself to be led across the field by Hawke, holding her hand tightly. There was a certain freedom to running through the open fields together, the only light coming from the stars above. They both knew what would happen if they were caught, but it only seemed to make both woman want it even more. The smooth swipes of the windmill sails beckoned them closer towards a night they would undoubtedly remember forever. Hawke pulled open the door and dragged Leliana inside before anyone spotted them.

The moonlight was shining through the opening in the roof, showing up the straw which littered the floor of the windmill house. The two women stood facing each other, holding hands, trying to catch their breaths from the run. Hawke could feel her heart pounding in her chest as she gazed into Leliana's eyes. The Chantry Sister smiled at her, tugging her arms gently to bring her closer to her. Their lips met again then, sensual and tender. Lana continued her momentum forwards after Leliana's gentle tug and walked the Sister back towards the wall, pressing her body into hers. They held each other's hands, fingers playfully wrestling with the others. Hawke started to direct Leliana's in between her thighs once more, encouraging her to pick up from where they left off in the tavern.

The Chantry woman obliged, giving into Lana's demands. Hawke could feel the hem of her dress being raised, smooth, cool fingers sliding up her bare leg, driving her crazy with anticipation. Leliana's lips left hers then, and began to kiss along her collarbone, her soft tongue tasting the saltiness of Lana's skin as her fingers pleasured her, soothing the throbbing below but also making it ten times more sensitive. Hawke couldn't stay quiet any longer. She closed her eyes, lost in the overwhelming sensation of this woman inside of her. She pressed herself harder up against Leliana as her legs began to tremble.

Leliana giggled in her ear, knowing her touch was driving Lana crazy. She nibbled her earlobe before resuming kissing her neck. Lana's entire body went into spasms then. She cried out loudly, clutching Leliana's robes in her hands. Leliana then led Lana to the ground. She pressed her weight down on her, allowing her legs to straddle Hawke, and resumed kissing her again. Hawke ran her hands up the inside of the Chantry robe and pulled it up, eventually over Leliana's head. The Chantry Sister gasped loudly as the cold assaulted her naked body. Lana looked up at her, admiring the fullness of her breasts and her perfect, slender body. Her hands ran along Leliana's thighs on either side of her before exploring along the woman's scarred abdomen and up over her pointed nipples. Leliana gasped once more, covering Lana's hands with her own, manipulating them to do her bidding.

Hawke wasn't able to stand it anymore. She reached up and rolled Leliana over until she was on top of her instead, bending down to kiss her once more. Suddenly she noticed her breasts spill out of the top of her dress. She hadn't even felt Leliana loosen it before and was surprised by the woman's subtly and skill. She had clearly done this before. Leliana pulled the dress down along Hawke's curves as she lay above her. Hawke shook it from her ankles and their naked bodies pressed together for the first time. With nothing else in their way, Hawke placed one of her legs in between Leliana's and used it to pleasure her, making slight thrusting movements above her. She could feel the wetness of the Chantry Sister on her leg, her desire festering and throbbing in her loins as her arousal increased, brought on by Lana's touch. Hawke then pulled her lips from Leliana's and ran them down along her body, tickling along her abdomen with her tongue before passing the thin layer of red hair below and burying her face between the woman's legs.

"Hawke?"

Lana could taste the sweetness of her lover, savouring the woman's juices as she pleasured her.

"Hawke!"

Leliana called out above her, lost in passion, her body writhing on the cold, straw covered ground.

"HAWKE! WAKE UP!"

Lana jumped up in her bunk, wakened from her dream. She smacked her head on the bunk above with a sickening crunch, forgetting where she was.

"OW!" she exclaimed, her hand covering the bump now forming on her skull. She screwed up her face in pain. Suddenly she heard a woman laugh beside her and turned to see Isabela through her watery eyes. The pirate was standing in her room in Gamlen's house her arms folded under her massive breasts as she chuckled at how Hawke had reacted to her calls.

"What in Andraste's name are you doing here?" Lana asked, annoyed more at the interruption of her dream than anything else. It had been such a good dream. Isabela scowled.

"Nice to see you too," she said, confused at Hawke's tone, "Is everything alright?"

"Apart from my head?" Hawke asked angrily. "Yeah, everything's fine...Sorry, I was just...having a good dream, that's all."

"Clearly," Isabela said, staring down at Hawke's underpants. Hawke looked down, realising her cover had fallen away when she jumped up. There was a wet stain on her underpants brought on by her memories of sex with Sister Leliana back in Lothering. Hawke groaned and threw the tattered sheet over her again, blocking her underwear from Isabela's view. Isabela chuckled, seemingly pleased with herself.

"Oh, I love wet dreams," she said excitedly, "You can tell me about it later at The Hanged Man."

Hawke rolled her eyes. "Not a chance, Bela. Since when did we become the type of people who share dreams?"

Isabela chuckled. "But wet ones, Hawke! Maker, don't be such a killjoy!"

"You only want to learn what turns me on," Hawke teased. "How did you even get in here anyway?"

"Bethany let me in. The Big Girl needs to see you. She let me out of the brig on the condition I would send a message to you, so here I am!" Isabela stated, bowing slightly with an at-your-service gesture. "Good deed for the day done."

Hawke sighed, "All right," she said, still massaging her head, "WE shouldn't keep her waiting. I'll get dressed and we can go and meet her." She got up out of bed and allowed the sheet to fall, walking over to the wash basin in nothing but her bra and panties. Isabela relaxed against the cupboard, smirking to herself as she admired the view. Hawke felt her burning gaze and turned to her then. The pirate was looking at her longingly. Seeing Hawke was watching her she retracted her focus from her ass and held up her hands in surrender.

"All right, I'm going!" she stated, as Hawke gave her a stern look. She straightened up off the cupboard and walked towards the door, opening it. Hawke began to search for some clean clothes to wear under her armor.

"Oh, and Hawke?" Isabela poked her head back into the room, taking one last sweeping glance at the woman's curves. "Nice ass by the way."

The pirate threw her a huge grin and a wink before leaving the room, closing the door behind her. Hawke shook her head and sighed. She couldn't help but chuckle as she resumed getting changed, thinking about the busty pirate Captain and her never ending wit. She thought about what Bethany had told her last night. It was clear Isabela liked her. Everyone knew it and the woman made it no secret. But then again who didn't Isabela like? Still though, she didn't seem to put as much effort into the game with others as she did with Hawke. Whether that was just because Hawke was a challenge remained to be seen. One thing was for sure though, Isabela wasn't going to give this up easily. She was determined to break Lana's resistance to her charms. But Hawke could anticipate her every move. They were both experts when it came to this sort of thing, and the game they had been playing, had only just begun.


	3. Chapter 3

"Alright Aveline, what's the problem?"

Hawke entered the barracks to find Aveline looking more serious than usual. She was sitting in the mess hall alone, her head leaning on her hand, face contorted as though deep in thought. There was a plate of untouched food in front of her. Something was clearly bothering the woman. She looked up relieved to see Hawke and got to her feet as she approached with Isabela and Bethany in tow.

"Hawke there's something I-What happened to your head?" Aveline blurted out, interrupting herself. She was staring at the Hawke concerned, her eyes scanning her newest injury. It hadn't been there yesterday. Lana reached up and felt the massive welt on her forehead again from where she had head-butted the top bunk this morning. It was still throbbing painfully.

"Oh...Rude awakening," she said, turning to Isabela pointedly. The pirate chuckled, her mind flashing back to that recent piece of entertainment. Aveline glanced at them both confused. Then her face turned to disgust.

"Oh Hawke you didn't!" she exclaimed, throwing her a look of disbelief. Now it was Hawke's turn to be confused.

"What?" she asked. Aveline glared at Isabela with more dislike than usual. Then her meaning became clear. "Wait, No! Are you kidding me? Of course not!"

Isabela's mouth fell open. "Uh hello! I'm standing right here!" Clearly she had gotten Aveline's meaning as well.

Hawke chuckled. "Sorry." She hadn't meant to sound so appalled at the idea.

Aveline relaxed. "Thank The Maker! You almost made me vomit."

Isabela rolled her eyes. "Uh again, I'm right here!"

Hawke laughed again. "No offence Bela."

The look Aveline was giving the pirate said otherwise. It was the same mix of irritation and disapproval. Bethany didn't know whether to laugh or not. The guardswoman didn't look like she was in any mood for humour. Though when was she ever really?

"That true Big Girl?" Isabela asked. "Not that I care what you think... I am curious though. You see a huge bump on Hawke's head and automatically jump to 'She must have slept with Isabela'?" She chuckled, "I'm flattered. I do like it rough Aveline but a whack around the forehead isn't my idea of kinkiness."

Unable to stop themselves, Lana and Bethany burst out laughing as Isabela smirked slyly at the guardswoman, waiting for her retort. Aveline looked furious. Maker she really couldn't understand why Hawke associated herself with this slattern.

"Well you seemed to get a thrill out of it last night, Whore. Next time I see you break a bottle over someone's head, being thrown in the brig will be the least of your worries."

Isabela's smirk slid off her face. She moved closer to Aveline. "Watch who you threaten, Prig."

Hawke jumped in between them before it got out of hand and forced them apart. "Alright, jokes over," she said, "What do you need Aveline?"

"I need your opinion," she said, throwing Isabela one last glare before turning back to Lana.

"On what? How to get laid?" Isabela joked.

"I could just go to you for that. You've had plenty of practice after all," Aveline replied angrily, glaring at the Rivaini again.

"Ha!" Isabela retorted, "Contrary to popular belief, I do have standards Big Girl, and you just don't cut it. Hawke on the other hand..."

Aveline threw up her hands in frustration. "Ugh can we just get through one conversation where you two don't talk about sex. Damn it Hawke!"

What did I do?" Lana protested innocently. Isabela laughed. Irritating Aveline was almost as fun as trying to seduce Hawke. The guardswoman was wound so tight that it was all too easy to pass up. Two types of pleasurable entertainment at her fingertips (and fingertips were always good for pleasure).

"You brought _her_ with you!" Aveline replied, pointing to the pirate.

"Sorry!" Hawke replied, taken aback by Aveline's temper.

"Anyway..."Aveline continued, her voice lowering to its normal level. "I have something to tell you. After we saved Guardsman Donnic-"

"Oooo Guardsman Donnic," Isabela interrupted again. "The rugged, handsome, sex of a man who brings warmth to your loins and-"

"SHUT UP!" Aveline yelled, her irritation getting the better of her now. Isabela laughed again, enjoying herself now. Hawke shook her head, trying not to laugh herself. It would only annoy Aveline further. Isabela didn't know when to quit. Well, she did, but when did that ever stop her?

"As I was saying," Aveline continued through gritted teeth. "After we saved Guardsman Donnic..."

Hawke saw Isabela open her mouth again to make another sexual retort. Before the pirate could interrupt once more, Lana reached out and covered the woman's mouth with her hand, trying not to giggle. Aveline continued, ignoring the pair of them as Isabela chuckled silently into Hawke's hand, trying to pry it away to get her words out.

"...So when Captain Jevon was fired and you went home...Hawke they offered me the position of Guard Captain!"

"What!" Hawke exclaimed. Isabela stopped laughing then and Lana released her.

"YOU! CAPTAIN!" The Rivaini exclaimed as soon as she was free. Aveline ignored her, focusing on Hawke.

"That's wonderful Aveline," Bethany said smiling at her. Aveline's smile managed to fight through her current state of indecision and annoyance.

"Thank you," she said proudly, "I need your opinion on whether or not to take it."

"Of course you should!" Bethany said. "What do you think Lana?"

Hawke still hadn't recovered from the shock. Isabela looked like she had regretted winding Aveline up earlier. The woman becoming Guard Captain would cause her a lot more problems than she already did as a simple Guardswoman. Both she and Hawke broke more laws than they kept and Aveline knew it. Hawke seemed to be thinking along the same lines.

"I...yeah, I mean...If you think that's best!" she said. Aveline nodded uncertainly.

"I do," she said exhaling, "It means I will no longer have the time to follow you around as much though."

"Oh balls, what are we going to do without you?" Isabela said sarcastically, unable to stop herself. Aveline turned to her.

"One of these days, I swear..." she threatened, squaring up to the pirate again. Curse Hawke for bringing her along! Aveline had been forced to listen to her all night in the brig and she'd had just about enough of her fill today.

"Don't worry about it Aveline," Hawke said, "I should have enough coin for The Deep Road's expedition soon anyway. We have a job lined up later on today. Congratulations. I'm proud of you."

Aveline turned back to her and smiled. "Thank you Hawke. This wouldn't have been possible without your help. I owe you."

"You can buy me a drink later," Hawke joked. Aveline rolled her eyes.

"Maker's Breath! Is that all you ever think about?"

Hawke laughed. "Come on Av! You should be celebrating. Let your hair down for one night at least. You won't get a chance too again when you become Captain."

"I'll think about it," she relented.

"Great!" Hawke said cheerfully.

"Well I must get to the Seneschal Bran and let him know my decision," Aveline said. "He's with the Viscount."

They exited the barracks and left Aveline at the bottom of the marble staircase which led to the Viscount's office. Aveline turned and hugged Bethany and Hawke. "I'll see you both later. Take care."

"Bye," They called after her. As they made to leave Hawke turned back and watched Aveline ascend the stairs, feeling pleased that at least one Ferelden refuge was making good for herself in Kirkwall. It hurt to see her people festering in Darktown with nothing but the clothes of their backs. She and Bethany on the other hand had been forced into smuggling, stealing, killing and Maker knows what else to survive. As they exited the Keep into the blinding sunshine outside, Lana glanced at her little sister. This was no life for a nineteen year old. She deserved so much more. Being the eldest, the burden fell on Hawke to help her family towards a better life. She couldn't help but feel she was failing dismally. Hopefully that would change after the Deep Roads though. Lana took a deep breath as the three of them went to collect Varric from The Hanged Man and head off on another dangerous quest together. Hawke hoped this one would be the last. It was too late for her, but there was still a chance to save Bethany. It had to happen soon, before it was too late.

* * *

"Well that was a bloody waste of time!"

Hawke and Bethany sat around the table with their mother, eating the stew she had prepared for them for dinner this evening. Gamlen was no doubt "eating" at The Blooming Rose tonight, using hard-earned coin he had once again stolen from Hawke's saving's under her bed. They had just returned from a procurement mission that had brought up nothing more than a few empty chests and an old boot. Gamlen and the quest combined had left Hawke with less money at the end of the day than when she started it. Her mood had turned drastically sour. So much that Isabela's witty one-liners couldn't even cheer her up. The pirate had taken off with Varric to The Hanged Man when they returned empty-handed.

"Come on Lana, at least we tried," Bethany said sadly. She stared at her older sister who had barely even eaten anything and was now playing with her food. The pressure Lana felt was starting to show again. Bethany wished there was something she could do to cheer her up.

"Yeah...Well, no matter how hard I try I still seem to screw up," Lana replied grimly. Bethany reached her hand across the table and placed it over Hawke's.

"That's not true Sister and you know it!" she said, squeezing Lana's fingers in her own. "Tell her Mother."

Hawke looked up at Leandra then. Their mother hadn't opened her mouth from she sat down to eat. Her eyes met Hawke's. Bethany instantly wished she hadn't said anything. There was an awkward silence around the table as Leandra stared at her first-born. The look on her face said more than words ever could: She still hadn't forgiven Lana for Carver's death. The disappointment her mother's features reflected hurt Lana so much more than when she had screamed blame at her as Carver lay dead in her arms back in Lothering. Tomorrow would mark the second anniversary of his death. Two years on and Lana still hadn't been forgiven by her mother. She still hadn't forgiven herself.

"I have to go," Lana said getting to her feet. She slipped her hand out from under Bethany's and rushed to the door, unable to stare at her mother's pain any longer.

"What?" Bethany said, jumping up. "You've barely even eaten a thing! And we never get to have dinner as a family anymore."

Hawke grabbed her green buckled jacket from the coat hanger and threw it over head.

"I'll get something in The Hanged Man," she said. She turned back to Bethany regretfully. "Sorry Sis."

Bethany stood helplessly as she watched Lana open the front door and walk into the night. Leandra still hadn't uttered a word.

Lana made her way through the street's of Lowtown towards The Hanged Man. She knew the way so well by now she could have walked made it blindfolded. That was assuming she wouldn't be mugged or killed along the way by the oh-so sophisticated population of Kirkwall's slums. She shoved her hands in her pocket and kept her head low against the breeze, which brought with it the smell of shit and piss wafting its way through the nearby alleys. Hawke held her breath as she passed, taking only shallow breaths when she really needed to. Someone had clearly had too much to drink and had been caught short somewhere close-by. Maker's Breath what did they eat? It smelt like something had died. Actually maybe something had. Hawke covered her mouth and reached out to open the door of The Hanged Man.

Suddenly Corff the bartender burst through the door with a struggling Isabela in his arms.

"Get off me, Corff!" she yelled. Corff released her when they were successfully outside, away from the continuing brawl going on inside. He closed the door to The Hanged Man.

"I told you when you came in Isabela, one more brawl and you're barred!" he yelled, "I can't have you scaring away my customers!"

"Then tell them to keep their hands off my coin in future!" Isabela yelled back, "It'll save me the trouble of having to throw a chair at them. Scummy buggers!"

Corff rolled his eyes, "Look, I saw what happened Isabela. Any other night and I would have left you away with it. But after the ruckus you caused last night which involved no fewer than twenty people in a brawl which spread into the street, I have no choice."

"Maker's Breath! It was only a bit of fun Corff!" Isabela said innocently.

"Well the three men with broken bones didn't seem to think so!" Corff replied. He sighed and lowered his voice then. "Look, just spend the night somewhere else and I'll think about letting you back in tomorrow."

"This is bullshit!" Isabela exclaimed. She picked up her dagger from the ground and placed it on her back alongside the other. Corff shook his head. He turned to Lana then, who was watching the scene interestedly.

"You deal with this, Hawke. I've had enough trouble for one night." He turned around and went back inside, closing the door behind him.

Hawke folded her arms and shook her head at the pirate, a small smirk playing on the corner of her mouth. Isabela smirked back.

"Oh don't give me that look," she said, "Varric went to bed early. How else was I supposed to entertain myself?"

"Uh huh," Hawke said, "Are all pirates this much trouble?"

Isabela chuckled, "Only the very good ones."

Hawke laughed. "So I guess that's my plans ruined tonight."

"How come? You weren't barred."

"Well, I'm hardly going to go and drink alone. That's depressing," Hawke answered. "Where do you wanna go?"

"Blooming Rose?" Isabela suggested. Hawke made a face.

"So I can see Uncle Gamlen hit on younger women who are way out of his league, spending coin that _I_ earned?"

Isabela laughed, "I guess that's a no."

The two women thought for a minute. There was no way Hawke was going back home. Suddenly she had an idea. "Wait here, I'll be back."

Isabela watched as she entered The Hanged Man alone. Moments later she came back out with a bottle of whiskey. Isabela smiled widely.

"Nice choice!" she said approvingly, holding out her hand. Hawke took a swig from the bottle and handed it to her. She watched the pirate take a few mouthfuls. Isabela wiped her mouth and handed Hawke back the bottle before they both began to walk. The pirate then led them through a series of back alleys. Hawke had no idea where they were going. Her mother's face appeared in her mind once more and she could feel the sadness build in her. Isabela glanced at her, wondering why she wasn't as chatty as usual.

"Are you going to tell me what's wrong or do I have to ask?"

Hawke sighed. "You don't wanna know my problems, Bela."

"You're right, I don't, but anything beats walking in silence. Spill!"

Hawke chuckled. Isabela was always brutally honest. Her face fell once more. "Mother still blames me for Carver's death."

Isabela immediately felt like shit. Her earlier retort seemed a bit harsher now. She turned to Hawke who was staring at the ground gloomily as she walked.

"Oh," the pirate replied. "That's a shame."

"Tell me about it," Hawke muttered. Isabela didn't really know where to take the conversation from there. She wasn't very good at talking about emotional stuff. Or rather, she just preferred not to. She hated how she sounded giving life advice to others. Who was she to tell others how they should feel?

"What does Bethany think?" Isabela asked. Hawke smiled then.

"She still sees me as a hero," Lana said, "I don't think I could ever do anything wrong in her eyes."

Isabela smiled too. "She's a sweet girl. You're lucky."

"I know," Hawke replied. "Speaking of Bethany..." Hawke suddenly remembered the conversation she'd had with her little sister last night. "I had an interesting conversation with her yesterday."

"Really?" Isabela asked, glad they had moved on to another topic.

"Mmm, thanks to a certain someone my sister is now questioning me on my sexual preferences and asking how woman have sex!"

Isabela burst out laughing at Hawke's blaming tone. "Good on her! She's clearly trying to pick up tips from the best. Well, one of the best."

Hawke laughed. "Yeah, well I told her to ask you next time."

Isabela chuckled and took the whiskey from Hawke, swigging another sip from the bottle. Before either of them could continue the conversation they rounded another alley way and were greeted with a surprise.

"Oh, how creative!" Isabela exclaimed amused. Hawke felt like she should have shielded her eyes but she had froze on the spot. A man and woman were in the middle of having sex against a wall in the most intriguing of positions. Isabela tilted her head to the side for a better look, unashamed. Hawke had to admit, she herself was curious. The couple looked up at Isabela's retort, realising they were no longer alone.

"Oh Maker!" the woman exclaimed. She pushed the man away from her at once and pulled her dress down before running the length of the alley. The man threw one look of embarrassment back at Hawke and Isabela before running after her, pulling up his pants as he did so. They heard him call after her in the distance.

When the man's calls had died out and the couple were no longer to be seen, Lana and Isabela turned to look at each other. They both started to laugh.

"I hope you weren't planning to take me here to do _that_!" Lana exclaimed.

"Oh Hawke, don't be silly," she replied. "I've got better plans than a back alley for you when you eventually decide to give it up."

"I guess you're not into 'back alleys' then?" Hawke joked, chuckling. This made Isabela laugh even harder.

"Nice pun! Why didn't I think of that?" she asked. The two women began to walk again, still recovering from the scene they had just walked into. They strolled through the alley for several minutes in silence, sharing the bottle of whiskey as they went.

"So what did you say to Bethany when she asked?" Isabela asked, breaking the silence. Hawke looked confused.

"Asked what?"

Isabela threw her a smirk. "About your sexual preferences."

Hawke snorted, "I don't think so, Bela."

"What?" the pirate asked innocently, her smile widening. "You can at least give me that."

Hawke exhaled and shook her head. She stared straight ahead of her and said nothing.

"Oh come on!" Isabela exclaimed, the anticipation getting the better of her. "Which is it? Men? Women? Both?"

Lana shook her head again and stayed silent, smiling as she stared ahead. They had reached the docks finally. Isabela continued to question her as they made their way to the water's edge and sat themselves down at the peer. The water crashed up against the rock beneath their feet, splashing them occasionally. Hawke deflected Isabela's questioning with simple answers as she gazed out along the harbour. She could see the Gallows in the distance, the statues of tortured slaves glistening in the moonlight. The ships docked along as far as the eyes could see, swayed gently in water, manipulated by the cool night's breeze as it swept throughout Kirkwall.

"Alright, you're boring me now," Isabela finally said. They had been sitting there for half an hour and Hawke still hadn't let anything out. Isabela got to her feet.

"Good," Hawke said, "Does that mean you'll finally stop questioning me now?" She sensed the pirate behind her. Suddenly Isabela's warm breath breathed into her ear, making her jump.

"Maybe," she whispered seductively, "Or maybe I've just thought of another way to extract the truth."

Hawke could feel the shape of Isabela's breasts as they pressed up against her back. She was in trouble now, she knew it. She closed her eyes, trying to ignore the pirate's skilful hands as they slowly made their way along her shoulders and reached down, resting along her chest. Isabela smiled to herself. She could hear Hawke's shaky breaths as she tried to control herself, trying not to give in to the situation she now found herself in. Isabela's breath was hot on her neck, trickling along it, making her quiver. Their game of lust had just become more advanced.

Unable to resist, Isabela nibbled Hawke's ear lobe playfully. The woman didn't respond. She hadn't moved since Isabela had decided to take more drastic measures to get what she wanted.

"Do you like that?" Isabela whispered in her ear. Hawke said nothing. Isabela smiled again. She was winning. They both knew it. Hawke was finding it hard to ignore her now. She hadn't had sex in almost a year. When she worked for Athenril there was always someone around looking for a quick screw to satisfy her urges. Working alongside her sister for the past year to get coin for the Deep Roads however, hadn't exactly left her any time or space to find a sexual partner. Every bone in her body was screaming out to turn around and ravage the busty pirate beauty behind her with everything she had. But yet she resisted.

Isabela ran her teeth along Lana's earlobe once more, allowing a small, eager groan to escape her. Still Hawke gave her nothing in return. She was good. Unwilling to lose the game after coming this far the pirate then decided to take things one step further. She placed her lips on Hawke's neck, running her tongue along it gently, tasting the sweetness of her skin. Hawke felt like she was about to explode. She held her eyes shut tight and tried to ignore the experienced tongue of Isabela as it massaged along her throat. Maker's Breath! Make it stop!

The hands hovering along her bosom them began to travel south. Hawke was in serious trouble now. She could feel the slender fingers of Isabela's slide down between her cleavage, brushing against her breasts through her top, then slowly edge their way down along her abdomen. The Rivaini was still kissing her neck. Hawke could feel herself becoming aroused against her will. The anticipation of Isabela's reach was becoming too much for her as the fingers slide past her naval, almost reaching their destination.

"Stop!" Hawke pleaded hoarsely, her breathing becoming heavy. Isabela didn't listen. She was almost there. "Please!" Hawke pled. She couldn't loose. Not now. Not like this.

Using all her will Hawke reached across and grabbed Isabela's hand, holding it from going any further down. Surprised, Isabela retracted her lips from Hawke's neck. Did she just get rejected? Hawke pulled the arms from around her neck then and Isabela released her. Lana opened her eyes and got to her feet. She began to walk away, unable to speak.

"Hawke wait!" Isabela called after her. Lana turned to look at her, her heart still thumping in her chest. There was a look of surprise on the pirate's face and little bit of awe. No one had ever been able to hold her off after she made it that far. Hawke really was something else. Isabela walked towards her. Suddenly a small smirk played on the corner of her mouth.

"Well played," she said, folding her arms across her chest. She could see Hawke beginning to mirror her smile.

"You too," Lana replied. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Isabela chuckled as she watched Lana walk back towards Lowtown by herself. She stared longingly after the woman, watching her work that seductive strut which Merril had so been jealous of. There was something about her, something special. Isabela wasn't sure what but Maker be damned did she want to find out! She ran her ringer along her lip, feeling the taste which the woman had left there. It was sweet. Strange, Isabela would have always considered her to be salty. Now that's she'd had a sample of the woman's goods however, she wanted more. Hawke had better watch out. She was coming for her now. One way or another, Isabela always got what she wanted.


	4. Chapter 4

Hawke made her way back through the alleyways which led into Lowtown from the docks. She was still shaking from her encounter with Isabela. The pirate had stepped up her game and caught Lana completely unawares. A year or so of full-on flirting and teasing had almost reaped the rewards in Isabela's favour. Hawke's solid resistance to her advances so far had been close to crumbling and Isabela knew it. Lana was surprised to find she possessed the will to deny the pirate's adventurous hands as they made their way down along her body, driving her crazy with anticipation. She knew where Isabela had been reaching, and she knew that if she didn't stop her from getting there that the game would be all but over.

Strangely, Hawke felt quite proud of herself. She had never put so much effort into _not_ having sex with someone before. Isabela was different in comparison to the others who had come and went though. She was bad news, and Hawke was already heading down a dark path. The last thing she needed was to let her guard down with someone she didn't fully trust. Well, maybe 'trust' wasn't the right word. After all, she trusted Isabela enough to have her back in a fight. Hawke considered this then. So she trusted Isabela with her life but...not with her sex life? Weird. Especially considering the pirate would definitely perform better with the latter. But Lana knew deep down that this was for the best. After all, how many people had she seen Isabela take to her bed (or which ever location she fancied at the time) and have her way with them before kicking them to the kerb? No. Anything that could ever happen between Hawke and Isabela was a recipe for disaster. And disaster didn't need a recipe. Not when it had already been dished out in the form of Hawke's life.

Lana pushed open the front door to Gamlen's hovel. It was pitch black inside, except for a lone candle burning in the corner on the small table in front of the fireplace. Beside it, curled up on a chair with a blanket, breathing softly, lay Bethany fast asleep. Hawke sighed sadly. She closed the front door as quietly as she could and made her way over to the chair where her little sister lay, seating herself down softly on the edge of it beside her. Lana gazed down at her face. She looked so peaceful, all the worry of the day erased from her young features. There was an innocence about her which Hawke envied greatly, a feeling that no matter what happened, everything was going to work out in the end. Lana couldn't remember the last time she had fallen asleep thinking that. She hoped that what ever Bethany was dreaming about was peaceful. They had enough trouble to deal with during the day without having their sleep disturbed as well.

Hawke reached out and ran her hand through Bethany's long brown hair affectionately, brushing it away from her face. She felt guilty for leaving her here earlier, with nothing but dirty dishes and an almost comatose mother for company. All the girl had wanted was a nice dinner with what remained of her family and they had let her down as usual. Gamlen hadn't even attempted to stay though. As soon as he'd stolen their hard-earned coin he was out the door, untroubled by the fact that there was a bowl of homemade stew set out for him and a young girl's need to be around her family and have some sort of normality in this crazy world. The greasy bastard. Hawke had had just about enough of him.

Then there was their mother. Lana understood that she was still grieving but Leandra seemed to have forgotten that she still had two other children as well as Carver. Two other children who were working their asses off to keep the family from falling apart while the world went to ruin around them. Lana's once close relationship with her mother had changed drastically. Now the woman couldn't even look at her eldest without blame in her eyes. And Lana couldn't stand it. That was why she had to leave. People always considered Hawke to be the strong one of the family. As she stared down at her little sister though, Lana disagreed. Bethany was a much stronger person than she was. No matter what occurred, her sister was always optimistic. She always saw the positive in everything and everyone. Hawke on the other hand could feel herself buckle under the strain of it all.

Carefully, so as not to wake her, Lana slid her arms underneath Bethany and lifted her up into her arms. As much as she didn't want to disturb her, Lana couldn't let her sleep out here on her own. It wasn't safe. Break-ins were frequent in Lowtown. Also Gamlen would no doubt be home soon, drunk as a skunk, and the last thing either of them needed right now was another fight. There had been too much fighting in this house. Bethany stirred a little but didn't wake up. Instead she cuddled into Lana's body and let out a small sigh of contentment. Hawke carried her into their bedroom and lay her down gently on their bunk. She then took off her jacket and shoes and lay herself down beside her, putting a protective arm across her little sister, holding her close. It was just them now. Carver was never coming back. Lana felt as though she needed to take better care of her family. It was slowly disintegrating around her and no matter how many times she escaped to The Hanged Man with Isabela, no how many bottles of whiskey she finished, no matter how many times she joked and laughed with her friends, she couldn't escape that undeniable fact.

"I'll get us out of this mess, Bethany," she vowed quietly to her little sister as she slept, "I promise."

Hawke leaned over and kissed her on the head before snuggling in beside her and falling into an uneasy sleep.

* * *

"So the Rivaini finally broke you?" Varric asked, chuckling a little.

"What?" Hawke asked, confused, "What in all of Thedas are you talking about, Varric?"

The dwarf looked confused. They were sitting at the large table in his private quarters in The Hanged Man with Bethany and Anders, having lunch. The mage looked up in shock at Varric's words, but no more so than Bethany. She threw her sister a questioning look.

"Lana! You slept with Isabela?" she exclaimed. Hawke's mouth fell open.

"No! Of course not!" she replied exasperated. "Who told you this?" she demanded of Varric.

"She told me herself," he replied, "Made me give up my share of the bet as well. Two damn sovereigns! At this rate Hawke I'll be living in poverty."

He stared regretfully around the large run-down suite which had basically become his permanent headquarters, feigning sadness at the thought of having to leave. Hawke sighed and shook her head. She couldn't believe the dwarf of all people had fallen for another Isabela scheme.

"Varric," she began, "Do you really think I would give it up to Isabela that easily?"

He chuckled. "Hmm, I guess not. I figured since I didn't see you last night that she was telling the truth."

"When does she ever tell the truth?" Anders chimed in. Hawke rolled her eyes. Anders was in one of his moods again. No doubt the plight of the mages was getting him down once more. Hawke wouldn't be surprised if Justice made a guest appearance soon. Or maybe he was here already. She shivered, still not able to get used to the fact that the mage had a Fade Spirit living inside him.

"Well, good luck getting your coin back, Varric," Hawke continued, "I'm sure some whore in The Blooming Rose is putting it to good use as we speak."

The dwarf chuckled along with Hawke and Bethany. Anders continued to sulk.

"I swear, if that pirate comes to me one more time complaining about itchiness down below I'll throttle her," he grumbled.

"Eww," Bethany exclaimed. Hawke and Varric laughed.

"Yes well, you know pirates," Hawke replied, "They tend to dock in unsavoury places."

"I heard that!"

The four of them looked up. Isabela was standing in the doorway, leaning against the frame with her arms folded. There was a smirk on her face which only meant one thing. She had indeed gotten 'lucky' last night. Well, those on offer at The Blooming Rose could hardly be classed as a good catch, but when one has the urge, fussiness sometimes goes out the window and you settle for a bit of average. And Isabela tended to settle a lot.

"Well, well, well," Hawke joked, leaning back on her chair for a better view, "Look what the cat dragged in. Have fun last night?"

The pirate sniggered. "Oh, a little. But then it chickened out and ran home."

Hawke chuckled, catching her meaning. Isabela stared at her intensely, her smirk becoming wider. The others looked confused. The pirate pushed off the door frame and entered, seating herself at the table.

"So...talking about me were you?" she asked, helping herself to a mug of whiskey.

"As a matter of fact Rivaini, we were," Varric replied, leaning forward and crossing his hands together on the table. "A little birdy tells me that you've been telling fibs." The dwarf tutted a few times, mocking disappointment. Isabela chuckled.

"You'll have to be more specific, Varric. I tell a _lot _of fibs."

Everyone at the table laughed except Anders. Maker, he was becoming about as fun to be around as Aveline.

"I'll put it simply," Varric continued, "Two sovereigns."

Isabela sniggered. "Oh! That little fib. Ah, come on Varric. How about I do something else to pay you back?" She began to run her hands up the dwarf's arm, reaching for his chest hair and twirling between her fingers. The dwarf laughed.

"I don't think Bianca would approve," he said. Isabela giggled seductively.

"Maybe she could join us," she joked, "Oooh, how I have longed to run my fingers along her trigger."

Bethany choked on her porridge then. Isabela retracted her hand and she, Hawke and Varric began to laugh. Lana patted her on the back.

"I take it you understood that one then, Sister?" she asked amused.

Bethany nodded, trying to catch her breath. Now that Lana had pointed out the numerous sexual innuendos Isabela used that she had been missing, she had been listening out for them recently. That one was easy enough.

"Ah, good for you Sweet Thing," Isabela said proudly. "Maybe you can help Merril out. Poor Kitten is still struggling."

Bethany and the others laughed.

"Merril still has trouble finding her way home, Maker bless her," Lana said shaking her head, "It will be a while before she understands the _ins_ and _outs_ of sex."

Isabela and Varric laughed even harder. Bethany looked at her older sister for confirmation.

"Another one?" she asked innocently. Lana nodded and patted her sister's cheek, throwing her a smile.

"Two for two, Little Sis."

Bethany grinned. Finally she didn't feel so naive compared to everyone else. At times she felt as though she should be sitting at the kids table. Not that Isabela, Hawke and Varric acted like adults however. Some of the antics they got up to in The Hanged Man were immature and childish but Bethany knew it was mainly to do with how much they had drunk (Mainly). Some of the other things they got up to were wild and downright dangerous though. Bethany was surprised at the amount of bar brawls she had seen so far. The three of them were a pack of jesters when they got together and sometimes the good-natured ribbing and tricks played on patrons ended up with the victims being offended and calling them out for a duel to regain their honour. That was the way it usually ended.

"Maybe you should be spending your time helping those less fortunate than yourself instead of trying to understand dirty jokes, Bethany," Anders scolded grumpily. The atmosphere at the table turned serious at once. Bethany's face turned red and she looked ashamed of herself. Lana however stood up and leaned across the table towards Anders. She'd had enough of his jibes.

"For the last time, Anders, my sister will NOT be taking anything to do with your manifesto!" she said firmly. Anders got to his feet as well then. Lana could see the blue glow beginning to return in his eyes. Justice was coming to the surface.

"She is a mage!" he exclaimed, "A mage living free of the Chantry's grasp."

"Exactly," Hawke replied, "And we want to keep it that way! Scheming with you against the Templars is a sure-fire way for her to end up in a damn cell in the Gallows."

"She should be helping them," Anders growled, "Bethany should be using her freedom to aid the mages in their plight. I shouldn't be the only one to put my neck on the line for this cause."

"This is _your _cause, Anders!" Hawke said, trying to keep her voice down. "Stop dragging my little sister into it. Andraste's Ass she's only nineteen!"

"There are mages in the Circle who are only six and seven!" Anders spat, "And you're worried about Bethany? She's not a child, Hawke. It's time you saw that!"

"I want to help, Sister," Bethany said in a small voice.

"No!" Lana exclaimed, turning to her. There was a look of fear in her eyes which Bethany could not ignore. She knew Lana was trying to protect her but she felt guilty for living a free life while other mages were suffering at Templar hands. She felt it was her duty to do something. As did Anders.

"But Lana...The children..." Bethany said sadly. Lana turned back to Anders, furious.

"I'm warning you," she growled, "Stay away from my sister. You may be my friend Anders but believe me when I say this. I will kill you if you put her in danger!"

Anders stared at her. Silence fell as the effect of Hawke's words rang in the air. There wasn't a doubt in anyone's mind that she meant what she had said. Anders stared at her for a few seconds. It was obvious he was angry but even he realised he had pushed Lana too far this day. She seemed more on edge than usual, although no one had commented on it. The mage gave her one last glare before snatching his staff from beside his chair and storming out of Varric's private quarters, slamming the door behind him.

Hawke exhaled. They listened in silence to Anders descend the stairs to the bar below. Bethany reached over then and placed an arm on her sisters. Lana looked at her.

"Sister..."

Hawke shook her head. "No, Bethany, please don't look at me like that."

"But he's right!"

"He's not right!" Hawke countered. "Anders is caught up in something crazy and I don't want you getting involved, do you hear me?"

"But-"

"No 'buts'' Bethany!" Lana interrupted, "I'm serious. It's too dangerous. Do you want to spend the rest of your life locked up in the Gallows?"

Bethany shook her head. As she stared into her older sister's eyes she could see the sheer desperation there to keep her out of trouble. She knew Lana was only looking out for her but still, Anders was right, she was not a child.

"Fine," Bethany replied grimly. She knew she couldn't win. "I'm going home. Mother needs me to help with the cleaning."

"Thank you," Hawke said. She accepted Bethany's kiss on either cheek and watched her walk towards the door, feeling uneasy. Damn Anders and his stupid manifesto!

When the door shut Hawke re-seated herself. She reached for her mug of whiskey and tipped it back into her mouth before realising it was empty. Isabela held out the bottle to her.

"The bottom of a bottle never has any answers, Hawke... But it sure does make you forget the questions," she joked. Lana couldn't help the smile from appearing on her face despite her dampened mood. She chuckled slightly along with Varric. Isabela may not be good with personal problems, but she always knew how to make people laugh. It was one of the things that Hawke valued most about her.

The three of them talked and drank for a while, getting the latest word on the street from Varric. The dwarf's many contacts were great at providing trusted information and news of any pending danger in the works.

"How's your fund for the expedition coming along? Should I make arrangements?" Varric asked.

Hawke sighed. "I was almost there...then Gamlen happened."

"Yes I saw him at The Blooming Rose," Isabela chimed in, "You do NOT want to know what he was doing!"

Hawke cringed, "Eugh, spare me, please" she said, shaking her head. Varric chuckled.

"Well, I'm sure something will come up," he continued, "I'll tell Bartrand to make preparations. Let me know when you will be ready."

"Will do," she replied. "The sooner this get's underway the better."

"Agreed," Varric said, "Have you thought about who is coming with us? What about Bethany?"

"Hmm, maybe," Hawke considered, "Her magic will be useful and I'd rather her than Anders. What about you Bela?"

A reluctant look appeared on the pirate's face. "I...Well, its just...enclosed spaces aren't really for me."

"Really?" Hawke asked, a smirk playing on her lips, "I rather got the impression you enjoy exploring people's enclosed spaces."

The three of them laughed. "It depends," Isabela replied, smirking back, "I may have a go at most but I do have a preference you know."

"Which is?" Hawke asked, raising her eyebrows. The pirate leaned back on her chair then and folded her arms, her grin widening.

"You first," she replied. Hawke chuckled and ran a hand though her hair. She had deflected the question numerous times last night. It was bound to come back and bite her in the ass again. Varric was looking between the two women, confused at the sudden change of topic.

"I get the feeling we aren't talking about the Deep Roads anymore?" he asked curiously, knowing full well that they weren't.

"Depends on what you mean by Deep Roads, Varric," Hawke joked. They all laughed. Sooner or later, any conversation between Isabela and Lana always landed on sex. It was inevitable. Varric was one of the few people who could keep up though. They rest of them enjoyed but didn't understand or understood perfectly well but were uncomfortable.

"Well, if I meant the ones you two were talking about we wouldn't even need a map. I assume you're both experienced enough to find your way?" The dwarf joked. More laughter filled the room.

"Oh I dunno, Varric," Hawke teased considering Isabela, "I get the feeling the pirate captain gets a little lost sometimes. You can check the map all you want but sometimes...you just can't find the _right spot_."

Isabela and Varric laughed again. The pirate suddenly stretched out her leg under the table. Hawke hadn't realised she had removed her boots until the Rivaini's bare foot ran up her leg and slid in between her thighs enticing her. Hawke gasped.

"You mean this spot?" Isabela asked seductively, a cheeky grin on her face. Hawke lost her words momentarily. Varric chuckled and shook his head.

"She got you that time, Hawke," he said, getting to his feet. "I think on that note I'll go and meet Bartrand. I'll see you later."

"Bye Varric!" Isabela sang after him. Hawke was still momentarily mute. As the door shut behind the dwarf the two women turned back to each other. They both gazed at each other for several seconds.

"Do you mind removing your foot from my groin?" Hawke finally asked, grinning. Isabela gave her a teasing smile.

"If you don't like it why don't you say so?" she replied jokingly. Hawke hesitated. There was no denying she liked it. But Isabela didn't need confirmation. Her breath caught once more as the pirate pushed her foot further in between her legs. She dropped her eyes from the Rivaini's then, struggling against her will.

"You were saying...?" Isabela continued. Hawke heard the tease in her voice, knowing full well that she was turning her on. Lana let out a shaky laughed and looked back up at the Rivaini determinedly. She knew she had to get the upper hand back. Isabela was in control. She had to rectify that.

"I was saying..."Lana began, reaching down and touching the pirate's leg, "That if you don't remove your foot from in between my legs...I'll do it for you."

She pulled Isabela's leg with her hand and retracted it from between hers, pushing her chair back a little bit to get out of the woman's adventurous reach. Isabela chuckled as Lana stared into her eyes defiantly. Slowly, reluctantly, she dragged her leg back to her side of the table. The pirate stood up then shaking her head in disbelief. Lana got to her feet as well.

"I have to hand it to you, Hawke," she said, walking to the door with her, "You really do have a great sense of self-control."

Hawke chuckled. She reached out and opened the door. Suddenly the Rivaini shoved her up against if roughly. She pressed her body up against Lana's, their faces inches apart now. Hawke was taken by surprise and froze to the spot. She could feel the warmth radiate of the pirate's body as she trapped her there, staring deep into her eyes dangerously. The Rivaini raised her hand and slowly ran it through Lana's hair, then traced along her cheek with a finger.

"But you can't hold out forever," she whispered seductively. "And I'm not going to stop until I get what I want."

She leaned in before Lana could reject and placed a tender kiss on her lips before releasing her and walking away. Hawke leaned against the door in shock and watched her go. Isabela turned back and threw her a smirk of satisfaction before continuing down the stairs. Lana raised a hand to her mouth, still feeling the softness of the Rivaini's lips on hers. Once again the woman had taken her by surprise. She needed to do a better job of anticipating her moves. Isabela was so unpredictable though. The lines of this game were becoming blurred and Hawke was clinging on by a thread. Maybe some distance between them was needed for her to regain her footing. Because one thing was for sure. The Rivaini's footing was fixed firmly indeed.


	5. Chapter 5

Hawke made her way down the stairs, a few minutes after Isabela had left her standing outside Varric's quarters. She had needed a few moments to compose herself after the latest pass the busty pirate had made towards her. Lana could still feel her lips on hers even though the kiss had lasted no more than a few seconds. There was intent behind it though, a lingering sense of intensity and passion. Isabela was trying to make her see what she was missing out on, what Lana was prohibiting herself from experiencing. The pirate had become very adventurous with her methods of persuasion. Maker's Breath, what was she going to try next? Hawke shivered at the thought. She definitely needed to distance herself from the Rivaini, at least until their latest flirting escapade had calmed down. It was beginning to get somewhat serious now, even more competitive than before. Isabela was beginning to cross the line between flirting and pretty much just going in for the kill. And Hawke wasn't _that _easy. She had to put the Rivaini back in her place before the woman took what she needed to satisfy herself and left Hawke wondering where her strong resolve had gone. That kiss had been given away too freely. She would not get another chance to do it again.

Lana reached the door to The Hanged Man and pushed it open. She took one last glance back at Isabela, standing at her usual spot beside the bar. The pirate was having a conversation with one of the local patrons, running her hand up and down his arm. She glanced towards the door, feeling Hawke's eyes on her. The Rivaini threw her a wink and a smirk before turning back to her latest catch. Lana smiled to herself and shook her head before exiting the tavern into the rain. She pulled her jacket closer around her, feeling the crisp severity of the wind and the sharp drops of freezing cold rain water as it lashed against her face. Within a couple of minutes she was soaked to the skin. Hawke screwed up her face and kept her head low as she battled against the wind, walking in the direction of Gamlen's home.

As Lana reached the front door of the house, shouting could be heard from inside. Again. Andraste's Ass! Would there ever be a moment's peace for them? Sighing to herself, she pushed open the door and entered.

"...can't believe you're spending my children's coin in a brothel!"

Leandra and Gamlen were at each other's throats again.

"Well you can't expect me to stay here all day with you lot," Gamlen yelled back, "I was perfectly happy until you showed up on my doorstep. Now I can't even relax in my own home!"

"The Blight wasn't my fault," Leandra replied, "Believe me if I could go back I would! I've never been more ashamed of you in my entire life Gamlen!"

"I don't need your approval, dear sister. You may have been Mother and Father's favourite but that was then. This is now. Just because you organised a stupid dinner doesn't mean I have to stay for it! You can't tell me what to do anymore Leandra," Gamlen said spitefully.

"I didn't organize it Gamlen!" Leandra exclaimed.

"Bullshit!" Gamlen spat, "Then who did?"

"I did, Uncle."

Lana looked up in surprise. She had been checking her mail at the door, not paying any attention whatsoever to the argument going on around her. That was until Bethany's voice chimed in. She said the words softly but Hawke reacted as though she had shouted them. Leandra and Gamlen fell silent and all three of them stared towards the bedroom where Bethany was standing in the doorway. Lana could tell she had been crying.

"I...well," Gamlen stuttered. It was clear he hadn't expected this. Bethany stared at him disappointed. "That still doesn't mean that I...You can't make plans for me girl!"

"What did you say?" Hawke shouted in disbelief. She knew Gamlen was an ass, but Maker's Breath talk about being a complete bastard! Bethany's head dropped. She stared at the floor dismally. Gamlen turned to Hawke then.

"I said the young girl had no right to presume I would be participating in family dinners without asking me!" he yelled. Hawke was fuming. She couldn't believe her ears.

"You really are scum Gamlen, do you know that?" she shouted angrily. "All Bethany wanted was to get to know you better. You _are_ our uncle after all. Or doesn't that mean anything to you?"

"I...Of course it does Lana!" Gamlen spat, "But I don't need stupid family dinners and social pressures spoiling the way I lived before you lot got here! I'm a grown man for the Maker's sake!"

Hawke shook her head. "You may be grown Gamlen...but you are no man!" she spat with disgust. "A proper man wouldn't leave his family to rot while he went whoring around, spending the coin they earned behind their backs."

"Don't you dare talk to me like-"

"I'll take to you how I want!" Hawke spat, "You want respect then you should try earning it Uncle. Not that you would know how. You've never earned a thing in your life I'm sure. Stealing mother's inheritance and then stealing from your nieces? Don't you _dare_ command respect from me, you worthless piece of shit!"

"Its fine, Lana," Bethany interjected quietly, "Just leave it."

"It's not fine!" Lana replied, walking towards her sister. "He stands there insulting you after you tried to do something nice for him and then asks me to respect him for it?"

"I know," Bethany said softly, "Just let it go, Sister. We can't win."

"I've let it go for too long, Bethany." Hawke shook her head, her anger uncontrollable now, "We have to draw the line somewhere. Stealing from us that's one thing, but I won't let him speak to you like that! Ever!"

"I said its fine," Bethany replied, her voice straining now.

"It's fine?" Hawke repeated. She couldn't understand how Bethany was so calm. "All the effort you and mother went to? All the coin spent on food? Wasted! All you wanted was a family dinner and this bastard didn't even have the decency to stay!"

"WELL YOU DIDN'T STAY EITHER!"

Silence filled the room. Lana stared at her sister, gobsmacked. Bethany had never yelled at her like that before. She was breathing heavily. Tears began to spill down her face as she stared at Lana, surprised a little herself by what had come out of her mouth. Hawke's jaw dropped slightly. She felt an uncomfortable sensation of guilt snake its way through her.

"I..." her words caught in her throat.

Bethany cried silently. She had not meant to sound so angry. She hated seeing that look of hurt on her sister's face. It was probably the first time Bethany herself had caused it. Her words had been harsh. She knew perfectly well why Lana had left yesterday during dinner. The awkwardness between her mother and Lana this time had been her fault. Lana had tried. Bethany knew she did it for her. But it was too much to ask. Bethany saw the look Leandra had given her eldest daughter. It hurt to see because it was so unjust. It was the first time she had ever saw Lana almost cry. She felt nothing but pity for her older sister having to face those silent accusations everyday, especially when she was working so hard for them all. It was a thankless task taking care of your family. That had been proven once again.

Lana stared at the floor sadly. When Bethany yelled, something was definitely wrong. She was normally so calm and understanding. Now Lana had turned the only person on her side against her. So wasn't sure how much more of this she could take. The pressure was becoming too much.

"See?" Gamlen blurted out, breaking the silence, "You think you're so high and mighty, dear, but your nothing but a screw up!"

"And you're nothing but a thieving bastard!" Hawke shouted back, turning to look at him.

"How dare you!" Gamlen shouted, moving towards her furiously. Hawke stood her ground, staring up defiantly into the face of all that remained of her Mother's family. She was extremely glad she had never met any other Amells. Gamlen's head was inches away from hers now. She could smell the alcohol from his breath.

"Give me a reason!" she growled at him, "I beg you!"

"Stop this, please!" Leandra said, jumping in between them and pushing them apart.

"You should be ashamed of yourself Gamlen," Lana said spitefully, pointing her finger at him from behind her mother. Leandra walked her towards the door.

"Get out," her mother said to her. Lana looked down, surprised to find her mother was talking to her.

"What?

Normally she was indifferent to her presence, speaking only when she needed something done. Leandra's brown eyes stared into her daughter's then. Hawke could see that familiar look of blame. She then realised her mother wasn't doing this to protect her. She was doing it to protect Gamlen.

"I said get out," Leandra repeated.

"You're throwing me out?" Hawke asked in disbelief. Leandra shook her head.

"No," she said softly shaking her head. "You just need to calm down."

"_I_ need to calm down!?" Hawke yelled. She couldn't believe her ears. "You and your dear brother have been arguing daily, not giving a shit about how the rest of us feel and all of a sudden _I need to calm down?_"

Leandra was giving her that same look of disapproval. A look she only seemed to reserve especially for her. Maker's Breath, was she ever going to get her mother's respect back?

"Go, Lana," her mother said firmly, pointing to the door, "Just...go. You've done enough damage to this family as it is..."

Hawke's breath caught. She froze, staring into the saddened eyes of the woman who had brought her into this world. They were cold, reproachful, unforgiving. A vision of a giant ogre reaching down towards Carver shot through Lana's mind. Then another of him lying dead in a pool of his own blood. It was as though she could read her mother's thoughts. Lana could feel tears build in her eyes as her mother gave her the most hurtful look a parent could ever give to their child. One of upmost disappointment.

Several seconds passed, Lana still frozen to the spot. The look her mother was giving her was more painful than any physical injury she had sustained in the past. Bethany and Gamlen were also shocked into silence at Leandra's harsh words. Hawke swallowed over the lump which had formed in her throat. Her jaw tightened as she fought back the tears in her eyes. Then she tore her view from her mother and turned, opening the door.

"Wait!" Bethany called, running towards the door, "Lana, please! Stop!"

It was too late though. Lana had already run the length of the district into the pouring rain without looking back. The evening had gotten dark without them realising. Bethany ran to the top of the steps outside Gamlen's house. Before she could follow Lana, the darkness had swallowed her sister up whole, leaving no trace of her behind.

"LANA!" Bethany yelled desperately after her, her voice echoing off the cold stone walls of Lowtown's derelict estates. Thunder rumbled in the distance. The rain fell in sheets, hammering off the tin roofs of Lowtown's houses and shacks. Bethany stared off into the distance after her sister. This wasn't right. How could things have turned out this way? After everything they had been through together and this was the way it was going to end? Bethany shook her head. She ran back into the house and grabbed her coat.

"Where do you think you're going?" her mother demanded.

"I'm going after her," Bethany replied. Her mother grabbed her arm.

"No you're not!" she exclaimed. "The streets are dangerous at this time of night."

Bethany shook out of her mother's grasp. She turned to face her.

"Lana is my sister!" she said tearfully, "She has done more to help this family than anyone, Mother. I can't believe you would say such a thing to her. After everything she's done for us."

"Your brother died to protect this family," Leandra said sadly. "Lana was supposed to look after him and she didn't! I am not about to let my other child run into danger after her."

Bethany couldn't believe her mother's words. "You forget one thing, Mother...Lana is your child as well...How long do you intend to punish her for?"

Not waiting for a response, Bethany turned on her heel and ran out into the rain, following the last direction she had seen her sister run.

* * *

The streets of Lowtown were creepy at night. Every corner Bethany turned she expected to be attacked. There were shouts in the distance of drunken men as they no doubt made their way home from The Hanged Man. She shivered against the cold. The rain was getting heavier. Bethany ran as fast as she could towards the tavern, her feet splashing in the mucky puddles filling up on the uneven ground. She pushed open the door and entered.

Inside was thick with cigar smoke. She scanned the patrons, looking for any familiar faces. Suddenly her eyes spotted Merril and Isabela. They were sitting at a table in the corner playing cards. Bethany rushed up to them.

"Hey Sweet Thing," Isabela greeted her, smiling, "Take a seat. I was just showing Merrill how to play. You might pick up a few pointers."

"Have you seen Lana?" Bethany asked desperately. Isabela shook her head.

"Not since earlier this evening. Why?"

"Something bad happened," Bethany said her eyes filling with fresh tears. "Mother threw her out of the house and she ran off. I have no idea where!"

"How awful!" Merrill said sadly, "I hope she's alright."

"She'll be fine," Isabela said, "Don't worry, she's a big girl Bethany. She can take care of herself."

"I'm worried about her," Bethany said sadly. "I yelled at her...I was just upset. It's Carvers anniversary today..."

She fell into the nearest chair, a look of despair on her face. Isabela stared at the young girl as she wiped her tears. She felt a stab of pity for her. The pirate got to her feet then.

"Stay here with Merrill," she said, "I'll go look for her."

Bethany looked up and smiled as best she could. "Thank you, Bela."

Isabela smiled at her and patted her on the shoulder. This wasn't any of her business but Bethany was so sweet. She didn't like seeing her falling to pieces like this. She knew Lana would be fine but as she stared down at her little sister, Isabela knew that no words would convince Bethany unless they came from Lana's own mouth. The pirate knocked back her drink and placed the cards down on the table before walking to the door and exiting the tavern.

Isabela searched Hightown, checking The Blooming Rose first. It was where she would go if she needed to clear her head. There was nothing like a bit of pleasure to counteract the pain. Or inflict more on you if that was your thing. Alas, Hawke it seemed wasn't the type of person to drown her sorrows in another's bosom. Maybe the place reminded her too much of Gamlen. Or maybe she didn't want to end up sleeping with someone who he had. There wasn't a large selection of suitors here after all.

Seeing The Blooming Rose as a lost cause, Isabela decided to check on Aveline in the barracks. She couldn't see why anyone would want to come here voluntarily. The pirate spent enough of her time in the brig. It was almost criminal to return by choice. But Aveline was tight with the Hawke family. Maybe she had seen her. Isabela reluctantly pushed open the Guard Captain's door and walked in.

"My, my...We have moved up in the world haven't we?" she joked, taking a look around Aveline's new quarters. The redheaded Guardswoman looked up in horror. Her least favourite person had just walked through the door.

"Don't you knock?" she asked angrily, staring up over a large stack of papers in front of her.

"Depends..." Isabela began, "I knock boots if that's what you mean?"

"When is that ever what I mean?" Aveline asked sarcastically. She was starting to get irritated already. Maker this was just too simple! Too simple it was staring to become boring winding her up. Isabela needed to think of something different. But now wasn't the time.

"Relax Big Girl, I'm not here to play," the Rivaini said. "Have you seen Hawke?"

Aveline got to her feet. "Why?"

"She's gone missing. Her mother kicked her out. Bethany's going frantic with worry so I offered my services," Isabela said simply.

"I thought the only services you offered had to be paid for, Whore" Aveline said, folding her arms. She seemed pleased with herself. Isabela laughed, untroubled by her jibe.

"Oh you've been waiting to use that one. Did you practice?" she mocked. Aveline's jaw tightened.

"Shut up!"

"I'll just be going then," Isabela said chuckling. "Clearly I was right about Guard Captains...Useless, no real authority. Not like on a ship."

"If you see Hawke tell her-"

"Tell her yourself!" Isabela called over her shoulder as she exited the barracks. "I'm not your message in a bottle, Guard _Captain." _The pirate's laughter echoed down the halls as she walked away. Aveline slammed the door shut behind her. Maker she hated her!

Isabela made her way back into Lowtown. This was hopeless. She was never going to find her. Hawke had a talent for hiding when she didn't want to be found. Just as this thought entered Isabela's head she spotted the woman in the distance. She was walking towards The Hanged Man, absolutely soaked to the skin. The pirate loved the rain. It reminded her of being at sea. She was accustomed to it. Hawke on the other hand looked like a drowned rat. But a very sexy one of course. The clothes she was wearing clung to her body like never before and Isabela got a little too excited at seeing her. She took a quick, approving glance at her ass before rushing up to greet her.

"Fancy meeting you here?" The Rivaini said in her ear from behind. Hawke jumped and turned to her. Isabela's smile wiped off her face at once. Lana didn't look like herself at all. There was a cold look in her eyes which stopped the pirate in her tracks.

"What happened to you?" Isabela asked curiously. Believe it or not she was genuinely concerned for the woman. There was no twinkle of mischief in Lana's eyes, no smirk playing on the corner of her lips, none of her usual swagger or charm she oozed. To be honest, she looked utterly exhausted. She didn't look like the same person who the Rivaini had kissed earlier that day.

"Go away Isabela, I'm not in the mood..."

"Bethany asked me to find you," the pirate replied, eyeing her carefully, "She's worried."

"I don't know why," Hawke mumbled, "My mother made it perfectly clear I've let everyone down."

"You don't really believe that do you?" Isabela asked.

Lana shrugged.

"Where have you been?" The pirate questioned.

"Walking," Hawke replied simply. "Apparently I need to calm down."

Isabela chuckled. "I don't think you could get any calmer, Hawke. You look completely worn out."

"That your idea of a compliment?" Lana asked. Isabela chuckled again. The words sounded more spiteful than humorous but Isabela could sense the joke underneath.

"If you want it to be," she replied, smirking. "Or do you want another kiss instead?"

Lana made a face, "You're not as good a kisser as you think you are, Bela."

"Oy!" the pirate said, whacking Lana on the arm. A small grin appeared on her face then. "Finally a smile!" Isabela approved. "You were starting to look like Fenris."

"If you're here to make me feel better about myself you're on a roll," Hawke said sarcastically. Isabela laughed.

"I always aim to please," she said.

"I saw that," Hawke said, "Did you have fun with your man friend back at The Hanged Man earlier?"

Isabela's smirk widened, "Jealous?"

"Hardly."

"Liar."

Lana turned to face her. Isabela was enjoying herself. She found it hard not too with Lana, even when she was sulking. She gave Hawke a sly smile as they stopped outside The Hanged Man.

"So I heard you're homeless now?" Isabela inquired.

"For a while at least," Lana said, "Why? Going to offer me your bed?"

Isabela laughed. "My bed's been available to you for quite some time, Hawke."

"Really?" she mocked, "I would never have guessed."

The pirate chuckled once more. "It's your choice," she said shrugging, "I won't bite...Not unless you want me to."

Hawke chuckled as Isabela pushed open the door to The Hanged Man. As she made to enter Isabela reached out to stop her.

"One more thing," she said, "Go easy on Bethany...She's pretty torn up about Carver."

"Oh, Maker!" Hawke said, holding her head. She closed her eyes tightly. "His anniversary..."

"Yep," Isabela confirmed. "Sorry..."

The pirate beckoned her inside with her outstretched arm and led her over to her table. Bethany and Merrill were still sitting playing cards. Bethany jumped up as soon as she seen Hawke.

"Lana!" she exclaimed running forward, "I'm so sorry, Sister. I didn't mean what I said. I..."

"Ssshhh," Hawke soothed. She reached out and wrapped her arms around her. Bethany melted into her older sister's embrace and buried her tear-stained face in her soaking wet clothes. "It's ok...Don't worry..."

"Are you alright?" Bethany asked, still clinging to her.

"Fine," Lana answered untruthfully. She was far from fine but Bethany didn't need to know that.

Isabela returned to the table a moment later with a bottle of red wine. Hawke watched from over Bethany's shoulder as the Rivaini poured some in each of the four goblets she had laid out. Lana kissed her sister on the head and led her over to the table. Isabela raised her goblet in the air.

"To Carver," she said, staring at Hawke. Lana smiled at her in thanks and she, Bethany and Merrill all followed her lead.

"To Carver," they repeated simultaneously. All four of them took a sip and sat down. Lana regretted everything that had transpired today. It was supposed to be a time of remembrance and instead it had turned into a war. It wasn't exactly the best way to commemorate her little brother's anniversary. His death had hit Bethany harder than anyone. They were twins after all. At least he was resting peacefully now though. Those who die are never truly gone as long as one remembers them. And Carver's memory would live on forever in both Lana and Bethany's heart.


	6. Chapter 6

"No! Carver!... Get up….Please, get up!"

"Hawke!"

"No...No, please don't be dead. It's my fault...all my fault!"

"Hawke open your eyes! You're safe..."

"AGGHHHHH!"

"Sshhh you're ok, Lana, you're fine..."

Hawke's eyes suddenly flung open and she bounced upright in her bed with a sharp intake of breath. Her whole body was drenched in sweat underneath her stained shirt. She felt as though she had just run the length of Ferelden. The woman brought her hands to her head and grabbed fistfuls of her hair in a deranged sort of way, fighting back the tears which had been streaming down her face involuntarily as she slept. She never was one to cry. It was several seconds before she realised she wasn't alone. Isabela and Aveline were standing beside her.

"Maker's Breath, Hawke are you alright?" Aveline asked worriedly. Hawke wiped her face and swung her legs over the side on the four-poster bed, tearing off the cover as she did so, not hearing a word anyone was saying to her. She leaned forwards, resting her elbows on her legs and covered her mouth with her hands as the memories she had fought so hard to repress overcame her. Her little brother Carver, lying at the feet of a Darkspawn ogre, blood oozing out from underneath his armor. His body was twisted. It lay at an awkward angle on the mountain floor. The boyish, handsome face he had possessed was contorted in pain as his brown eyes stared blankly ahead, seeing nothing ever again.

Lana felt someone touch her then.

"Hawke?" Isabela asked cautiously, her hand resting on Hawke's shoulder. Hawke looked up at her, confused as to where she was. Isabela was giving her a weird look. Suddenly events from the night before came back to her and she remembered she had stayed in The Hanged Man. Varric had been kind enough to lend her his suite seeing as he had to leave late on business. That had saved her the awkwardness of having to stay with Isabela for the night seeing as her mother had kicked her out onto the streets. Not that she missed her or anything. She couldn't take anymore of Leandra's accusations. If she wanted nothing more to do with her daughter then so be it.

After several seconds Lana shook herself back to real life.

"What?" she asked absentmindedly. She got to her feet and walked over to the wash basin, shaking Bela's grip from her shoulder. Isabela watched Lana repeatedly throw water over her face as though trying to wash away what ever image was etched in her mind. The Rivaini had never seen her distracted like this before. It was a little unsettling to see.

"Are you alright?" Isabela asked, repeating Aveline's words. Lana didn't seem to know where she was or how she had got there.

"You were shouting in your sleep," The Guard-Captain added, also staring after her concerned.

Hawke leaned on the side of the wash basin and gazed down into the water. She felt the stares of the others on her. "Really?" she asked slightly irritated. She dreaded to think what she might have said and decided to pass it off as something not out of the ordinary. "So what...What's with all the fuss?"

Isabela chuckled slightly at Hawke's change of tone, though the look of concern still hadn't disappeared off her face entirely. At least Lana sounded more like herself though.

"Well, this time Hawke, I don't think you were having a wet dream," The Rivaini joked, smirking. Lana turned around to face her.

"Wait! Are you sure?" she replied in a sarcastic tone. "Don't you wanna check my underwear for confirmation?"

Isabela chuckled. "Well, I'm pretty sure I'm right...Though, I won't pass up an opportunity for another peek at your ass."

Lana laughed along with the pirate as best she could, watching the woman's eyes scan her half-naked body appraisingly. Hawke knew exactly what she had been dreaming about and she had no desire to speak about it to anyone. Jokes were great for hiding behind. Humour was great for hiding hurt. Isabela seemed to sense her reluctance to say what was on her mind and went along with her. Aveline however did not.

"Were you dreaming about Carver?" she asked gently, trying to bring to conversation back to something serious. "We heard you say his name."

Hawke's laughter died out immediately. She turned away from them both, feeling her face fall, and began to pick up her possessions ignoring Aveline's question.

You know Hawke, if you need to talk..."

Hawke fought hard not to roll her eyes. She shook her head. "I don't."

Aveline touched her arm and slowly spun Lana around to face her. There was worry on the Guardswoman's face. She wasn't fooled by her bravado.

"Hawke..."she admonished, "I know things get hard for you sometimes..."

Lana sniggered. "As a matter of fact Aveline, things haven't gotten _hard_ for me in a while...I think I've rather lost my touch."

Isabela burst out laughing along with Hawke. She hadn't been expecting another joke so soon. Aveline exhaled in annoyance. The pirate slattern wasn't helping the situation at all.

"For The Maker's sake! I'm trying to have a serious conversation with you," she scolded angrily, "Will you at least give me something back?"

"Aww sorry Aveline, I'm not really a giver, I'm more of a taker you know?" Hawke joked once more.

"Don't worry Big Girl. Things only stay _hard_ for a time...then you feel that sense of glorious release and everything goes back to normal again," Isabela added. They started laughing even more. The pirate had doubled over in kinks now at the look of frustration intensifying on Aveline's face. The Guard-Captain really wasn't happy with Lana's method of evasion and it didn't help with Isabela here egging her on. Lana turned away again, avoiding Aveline's piercing stare before her resistance crumbled, and beginning to put her bottoms on.

"Will you stop making sex jokes?" the redhead pleaded, "With everything that's happened recently it must be hard for you to swallow all at once."

Lana and Isabela were now buckled over in hysterics, holding their sides. Aveline sighed, frustrated with herself now. She had walked into that one with her poor choice of words.

"Oh Aveline," Isabela said shaking her head and wiping her tears of laughter. "Keep trying to penetrate Hawke's barriers, you'll get there in the end." Fresh laughter filled the room once more. Hawke pulled on her jacket and buckled it. Aveline looked furious with the pair of them.

"Oh be quiet Isabela. The last thing this conversation needs is you adding your filth to it!"she shouted. Lana walked past them both and made her way towards the door. The Guardswoman pressed her further. "Look Hawke you need to talk about-"

"No I don't!" Lana yelled back, her joking tone having been worn out finally. Isabela stopped laughing at once and the situation became tense. Hawke turned to Aveline and gave her a look of warning. "I don't need to talk about anything Aveline...What I _do_ need is a drink. A very big one..."

She turned away and continued onwards, descending the stairs of The Hanged Man to the tavern below.

"That's your solution for everything," Aveline mumbled after her as she and Isabela followed Hawke down the stairs.

"Oh, hush Big Girl, all she needs is a stiff drink." Isabela said waving away Aveline's comment. "And me as well come to think of it." She added with a chuckle.

Aveline sighed disapprovingly. "This is your damned influence, Whore! Before Hawke met you she barely touched a drink."

Isabela laughed in disagreement as they made their way over to the bar. "That you know of, Aveline. Hawke drinks like a pro. She can hold her liquor better than I can."

"Well that's not news to me seeing where you spent the night." Aveline replied. That wiped the smile off Isabela's face. Hawke bought them a bottle and poured out three mugs of whiskey. She and Isabela knocked theirs back without question. Aveline took one whiff and set it back on the counter.

"You don't want it?" Hawke asked.

"Hardly," Aveline replied harshly. "Some of us have work to do."

"Fine," Hawke replied annoyed. She snatched Aveline's mug and knocked hers back as well before grabbing the bottle and leading them over to a table. Aveline stayed where she was. Hawke looked up at her. "If you're so damn busy why are you still here? Shouldn't you be off killing bandits and catching criminals?" Isabela laughed.

Aveline gave her a sour look. "If you must know I was bringing this one back from the brig...AGAIN!" She pointed to Isabela. "Spent the night there after yet another bar brawl."

"Well don't let me waste you time then, _Captain,_" Hawke replied bitterly, before knocking back another whiskey. She slammed the mug back down onto the table in anger.

"Hawke..." Aveline said regretfully, walking towards her. She hadn't meant to sound so condescending towards her. She knew there was a lot of the woman's mind at the minute and didn't want to add to it.

"Just go Aveline" Lana replied gloomily, staring down into her empty mug. Aveline stood for several more seconds, wishing she hadn't of pushed her to talk before. Then she sighed and walked off in a temper, slamming the door to The Hanged Man behind her.

"Oh I wish someone would bend her over and stick it to her good," Isabela joked as she watched her go. "She needs that tension relieved big time and the current stick up her ass doesn't seem to be doing the job."

Hawke chuckled, rediscovering her humour once more.

"I'm sure Donnic would be willing," she replied. Isabela laughed and nodded her head in agreement.

"Hmm...You're probably right," she said, "I'd do it myself if she didn't hate me so much. Anything to leave us in peace. I don't think she could handle what I have to offer though. She's too closed-minded. You, on the other hand..." Hawke stared at her. Isabela was grinning back cheekily.

"I'm not nearly as drunk enough right now," Hawke joked.

"Oy!" Isabela replied, smacking her on the arm just as she had done last night. They both laughed. Isabela grabbed the bottle of whiskey and poured them more drinks. Hawke stared down into the empty mug, watching it fill up with the soft brown liquid. Isabela sat the bottle back on the table then knocked hers back in one. She glanced around at Hawke, who still hadn't touched hers. There was definitely something bothering her.

"Look...Without sounding too much like the Big Girl...Are you sure you're alright?" Isabela asked after several seconds. Hawke waved her off and proceeded to down her whiskey.

"You said before you don't want to hear about my problems, Bela... And I don't want to talk about them either." She replied, placing her mug back on the table and standing up. "I need to get h..."

Hawke stopped. She had been about to say she needed to get home. Then she remembered she didn't have one anymore. She sighed forcefully and leaned her hands on the table. Isabela watched her. She could almost feel the stress radiate off the woman. It was a look that didn't suit Lana. She still looked attractive...but in a serious sort of way. Isabela wasn't really turned on by seriousness. Hawke was normally much more exciting.

"Sorry," Isabella said, before emptying the remains of the whiskey in to her mug. Lana stared at it for a few seconds. She then re-seated herself and cupped her hands around the mug once more before tossing the liquid back into her mouth and feeling it burn her throat as it slid down into her stomach.

"Did Bethany get home alright?" Hawke asked Isabela. The pirate nodded.

"You really need to give her more credit, Hawke. She knows how to take care of herself."

Lana sighed. "I know...Can you blame me for being a bit over protective though?"

Isabela said nothing. No, she couldn't really. Kirkwall's Templars were vicious and cunning. They were ruthless in their methods of catching rogue mages. They hunted apostates for sport. She had seen it with her own eyes only recently.

Just then the door to The Hanged Man opened and in entered Varric.

"A jigger of whiskey, Corff!" he ordered loudly, "Stick it on my tab. I'll be over here."

He made his way hurriedly to the table where Hawke was sitting with Isabela.

"Good news, Hawke!" he declared, sitting himself on a stool, looking pleased. "I got a tip last night that someone wanted to meet you. I decided to go instead though and check it out. This dwarf's...a bit shady shall we say. Goes by the name of Dougal. He wants to buy in on the Deep Roads expedition, in exchange for shares of course."

"Really?" Lana asked, looking up. The dwarf nodded and reached into the giant pocket of his brown leather jacket, producing a large amount of gold coins. Isabela whistled.

"That's a lot of gold!" she said, her eyes lighting up.

Hawke gasped. "But that means-"

"That we can get this expedition under way!" Varric finished happily, slamming the palms of his hands on the table excitedly making the coin jingle. Lana mirrored his smile.

"Finally!" she exclaimed, "Go and make preparations with Bartrand at once. Tell him to meet us in the square in Hightown in an hour. I'll get the rest of the coin and the Deep Road maps from Gamlen's. Round up the others as well!"

"Yes Ma'am," the dwarf said, getting to his feet. "Let's get this show on the road! Bartrand will be so pleased!" He took the jigger of whiskey which Corff has left on the table for him and took a few swigs before scooping the coin back into his coat pocket and setting off.

Hawke turned to Isabela then. "So has the sight of gold convinced you to come with me then?" she asked jokingly. The pirate laughed.

"Hmmm...Are you _sure_ there will be more down there?" she asked. "I don't want to put myself in danger for another old boot."

"All most positive!" Hawke replied, "Come onnnnn...don't leave me to handle the Darkspawn on my own!"

The Rivaini sighed, "Ahhh all right," she relented, "If you insist..."

"I do," Lana replied, smirking.

"On one condition!" Isabela said.

"What's that?"

The pirate smiled and ran her hand up Lana's arm seductively. "I get to share your tent."

Hawke laughed loudly. "My tent or my bed, Bela? They are not a package deal."

Isabela chuckled, "I didn't know your bed was on offer..." she swooned, throwing a flirting gaze in Lana's direction.

"It isn't!" Hawke said bluntly, not wanting the pirate's thoughts to go running away with themselves. She laughed.

"Not yet," Isabela joked, "But until then...I guess I'll make do with sharing the tent."

"It's settled then!" Hawke replied. Isabela smirked.

"For now."

Lana rolled her eyes. She got to her feet. "Keep telling yourself that, Bela...I'm going back to Gamlen's. I need to get the coin and tell Bethany what has transpired."

"Are you sure that's wise?" The pirate asked. "Maybe you should send someone else there to pick it up instead."

"Like who?" Hawke asked, "I don't have a choice...I just hope Mother won't be in..." Her face fell for a second before she shook herself together. "I'll see you in Hightown later."

"Later," Isabela called after her.

* * *

Hawke exited The Hanged Man to be assaulted by the strong wind. She stared up at the sky. It was clearer than yesterday. The sun was nowhere to be found though and the few clouds that remained overhead looked to be filled with rain once more. She realised had slept most of the day. It would be almost nightfall by the time they left on the expedition. Not that it would matter though. The Deep Roads were in constant darkness no matter what time of day it was. Only night existed down there.

Lana had not realised just how uncomfortable the bedding in Gamlen's house was until she rested her head on Varric's bed in The Hanged Man and immediately fell asleep. Or maybe that had something to do with how much she had drunk. Unfortunately passing out as soon as her head hit the pillow didn't stop her dreaming about what had happened in Lothering. After all, Carver had been on her mind the entire night. It was two years ago to the day and Hawke still couldn't shake the grief that overcame her when she remembered her brother being crushed to death by an ogre. She shook her head, not wanting to relieve it again and made her way up the steps in front of Gamlen's house.

Hawke hesitated outside. She was dreading entering the house to see the reproachful faces of her mother and Gamlen. Another fight wasn't what she wanted, even though she had a lot left to say. After a few deep breaths she turned the rusty handle and pushed the door open a crack, sliding inside.

The normal horrible smell of mouldy cheese and dirty feet was masked by the smell of her mother's cooking. Lana closed the door behind her and froze as her mother looked up at her from over the pot she was standing at. Curses! This was exactly what she had wanted to avoid. They stared at each other, neither blinking. Lana once again felt about an inch tall under her mother's judgmental gaze.

"Where were you?" Leandra demanded softly. Lana was shocked she had even asked.

"What do you care?" she replied bitterly. "Don't worry, I'm not staying..."

She pushed away from the door and walked into the bedroom without another word or glance at her mother. Bethany was lying on their bunk, her eyes pouring over a book their father had given her long ago. She tossed it aside as her eyes fell on Hawke.

"Sister!" she said happily, getting to her feet and throwing her arms around her.

"How are you feeling?" Lana asked, holding her tight and kissing the side of her head.

"I'm fine," she answered quietly. "Are you coming back to stay?"

Hawke sighed. "No...sorry, Bethany. I just came for my things. The Deep Road expedition is getting underway today. Varric found us a backer."

Bethany released her and watched her sister pack her things into a sack, sliding the chest of coin out from under their bunk and placing it on their bed.

"That's wonderful news!" she exclaimed, "I'll get my stuff then."

Hawke looked up at her and smiled. "You're coming along?" she asked surprised.

Her little sister nodded. "I...I don't want to stay here with Mother and Gamlen...I want to be with you Lana."

Lana smiled wider and got up to place another kiss on her sister's cheek.

"I love you, Bethany...What would I ever do without you?" she said hugging her tightly. Bethany chuckled.

"I love you too, Sister. I missed you last night."

"Sorry," she whispered, "But I don't think Mother wants me back...You can come and stay with me any time though."

Hawke released her and began tossing the rest of her things into the bag. When it was finally full she grabbed the sack of her possessions in one hand, stowing the chest of coin under her other arm and balancing it on her hip.

"Ready Little Sister?" she asked, as Bethany put on her shoes. She got to her feet then and grabbed her pack and her staff.

"Ready!" she said confidently.

They re-entered the main room of the house then. Leandra was still cooking at the stove. Hawke ignored her and browsed the new letters which had come for her while she was gone. Bethany began to pack some food for their trip.

"Where are you going?" Their mother asked.

"We're finally getting the expedition under way!" Bethany informed her excitedly. "The Amell Estate will be ours again in no time!"

"You can't both go!" Leandra exclaimed. Lana looked up from her letters then. Her mother turned to her. "Please," she begged, "Leave your sister out of this!"

"This is Bethany's as much as it is anyone else's," Hawke replied bluntly. "She worked hard to raise this money...as did I. Not that you ever noticed."

Leandra shook her head. She dropped the giant ladle she was holding into the pot and approached Hawke.

"Please Lana! I beg you!" she said almost hysterically, grabbing the front of her coat, "You I understand wanting to do this! But leave your sister here where she is safe."

Hawke stared at her mother's desperate expression for a few seconds. For a second she felt a stab of pity for her. Then she realised she only had concern left in her eyes for one daughter. Lana snorted, "It's nice to know you have a mother that cares about you," she said sarcastically.

"This isn't about you!" her mother exclaimed.

"Of course it isn't!" Lana yelled, pulling her mothers hands away from her, "When is it ever Mother!?"

"_Please!_" Leandra begged again, tears forming in her eyes. Lana shook her head in disbelief and turned away.

"Come on, Bethany," she called over her shoulder, "Let's get out of here."

Hawke opened the front door and walked outside. Bethany approached their mother.

"I'll be fine, Mother," she said, hugging her, "You'll see."

Leandra clung to her tightly, not wanting to let her go. Bethany hugged her back, resting her head on her shoulder. Lana listened from outside as Leandra tried to convince Bethany to stay. She was whispering words of caution and worry into her ear, reserving nothing but spite for her eldest. Hawke felt a massive empty hole in her heart as her mother yelled obscenities at her for disobeying her request. She wondered why her mother had stopped loving her. Hawke had only ever tried her best to please her. Apparently it would never be good enough. A single tear rolled down Lana's cheek as she walked down the steps without looking back. Bethany soon followed, leaving a hysterical Leandra behind her, screaming for her to stay. Her cries echoed throughout Lowtown as the two remaining Hawke children walked into the night.


	7. Chapter 7

"About time you showed up, I've been here all evening!" Bartrand boomed loudly as Hawke and Bethany approached. It was clear that the dwarf's attitude hadn't improved form the last time they spoke.

A crowd of dwarves and men had amassed in Hightown to join them on the expedition. They were standing at the ready, equipped with weapons, giant pickaxes and shovels. Lana wouldn't have minded merely being hired help as well, but she had to admit it felt good to work from the top for a change rather than have to wade through all the crap at the bottom to make something of herself. This time she was in charge, which meant no one would be able to screw her over again. She had learnt her lesson while working under Athenril.

"Sorry...family problems," Hawke answered with a sigh. She sat the chest of gold at the dwarf's feet. "Your payment, Bartrand."

His face lit up as he took a peek at the gold inside.

"You're joking!" Bartrand said in disbelief.

"What did I tell you Bartrand? Not bad for a human," Varric said, making his way over to them with the other gold courtesy of Dougal. Bartrand stroked his beard. It was clear her hadn't expected Hawke to get the coin.

"All right _partner_. Full share of the profits between you, me and Varric," Bartrand said.

"Agreed. Just don't mess me about," Lana answered bluntly, "I need this."

The dwarf laughed. "Don't we all, Human?"

Hawke snorted. It was true. This was an opportunity too good to pass up for any of them, a free ticket out of the slums if you were willing to gamble hard-earned coin to get there. For there was no doubt that this was a gamble...a big one. The Deep Roads were a dangerous place, the homeland of the Darkspawn so to speak. And neither Lana nor Bethany needed a reminder as to how vicious those foul, soulless creatures could be. They had almost swallowed Ferelden whole during the Blight and if not for the Grey Wardens they would have succeeded. On that note, as Hawke scanned the crowd, she couldn't help but realise that there seemed to be a Grey Warden sorely missing today.

Bartrand lifted the chest of gold and walked away as Lana spotted familiar faces a short distance from her. She, Bethany and Varric made their way through the chattering crowd over to their companions who were waiting patiently on the sidelines.

"Where's Anders?" Hawke asked curiously, staring at them all. Her companion's shifted their weight uncomfortably and a few looked at each other, reluctant to respond.

"He's not coming," Fenris said then, "Apparently the mage's manifesto is more important than the expedition we've been working towards for the past year."

Hawke groaned. She had been hoping for some last-minute advice from the Grey Warden before setting off. They all wanted to avoid a repeat of Lothering. Anders had promised her he would be here to advise them. It appears that promises had lost their sway these days though. Maybe after their argument a few days ago in The Hanged Man he had stayed away out of spite.

"Damn it!" Lana said angrily, "Well, screw him, he'll be getting nothing of the spoils then. More for us!"

"Here, here!" Varric exclaimed happily, whacking Isabela on the arm. Isabela didn't react like her usual uncaring self however. It wasn't often the idea of gold didn't bring a smile to her face. She was standing beside Varric, leaning against the nearest building with her arms crossed, wearing a look of uncertainty as she scanned the crowd of workers hired by Bartrand for the expedition. "Aww come on Rivaini! Cheer up. You're one step closer to getting your ship back!"

Isabela exhaled. "Even that isn't making me want to do this enough."

"Don't back out on me now!" Hawke said, "I need you down there."

"Oh, I know you do Sweet Thing," Isabela replied with a smirk. She pushed off the wall and put her arms around Hawke's neck, giving her an appraising look up and down, "And I'd be more than willing to help you out..."

Hawke laughed and looked away from Isabela, knowing she was talking about _her 'Deep Roads'_ instead. She withdrew the Rivaini's arms from around her neck and stepped back. "I can handle down _there _perfectly well by myself."

Isabela chuckled, "Oh, I'll bet!" she said alluringly. Hawke laughed and shook her head, realising how that sounded.

"Well I'll be awful lonely in my tent without you...I wonder what I could get up to..." she joked.

The pirate smirked, the certain image appearing in her mind. "Mmm, you certainly know how to entice a girl, Hawke."

"Are you coming then?" Lana asked, smiling back. Isabela laughed.

"In more ways than one," she joked with a wink. Hawke rolled her eyes as a few of the others laughed.

"Ahh Maker, my ears!" Aveline complained, cringing, a look of revulsion on her face, "I can't take much more of this crass. I hope you're not expecting me to come along to see you off."

Hawke reached out to place a hand on the Guard Captain's shoulder, still sniggering.

"Sorry Av," she apologised, patting the guardswoman's armor, "At least we'll be out of your hair for a while. You can stay here if you want. I'm sure there won't be that many bandits on the roads out of the city. Kirkwall will probably go to ruin with out you anyway. You know what they say about mice when the cat is away."

"The pussy cat," Isabela purred under her breath mockingly. Aveline threw her a glare before turning back to Hawke.

"You know, you're probably right," she agreed, "If it's ok with you then I'll be heading back to the barracks when you depart."

"Fine with me," Hawke said. The guardswoman looked calmer then. At least she wouldn't be subjected to Isabela any longer than she needed to be. The weeks ahead without her making snide comments about everything would be a gift from The Maker. Funny, Isabela was just thinking the same thing.

Bartrand approached them, looking eager to get going. "All set. All we need now is an entrance."

"I have maps," Hawke said, producing the Deep Roads plans from her pack. The dwarf's face lit up.

"Where'd you get these?" he asked in disbelief.

"Didn't I tell you we could find a Grey Warden, Brother?" Varric interjected, "Mother didn't raise a fool...Well ,she didn't raise two of them."

Bethany and the others laughed. They all circled round, scanning the Deep Road options available to them.

"What's this? Three... four entrances, all in the Free Marches?" Bartrand exclaimed excitedly.

"We might as well choose the closest one," Hawke said, pointing it out with her finger, "It's just under Sundermount and looks the most promising. We can be there by midnight."

"Very well, it's settled then!" Bartrand shouted excitedly. "I'll get the men ready. Time to wrap up any business you might have in the city, my friend. We'll be gone for several weeks."

"I'm ready now," Hawke said, beginning to feel excited at the prospect of an adventure, "Let's get this show on the road."

"YES!" growled the dwarf, tensing his fists in anticipation before turning away. Hawke smiled at her sister and packed up the map as Bartrand make his way to the front of the crowd.

"All right you maggots, listen up!" The excited chattering of the crowd died out at once as the dwarf's deep voice echoed throughout the square. "We've chosen one of the hidden entrances. The Deep Roads there will be nice and virginal, ready for a good deflowering! HA!"

Varric and Isabela burst out laughing.

"Now there's an interesting image," Varric mumbled to Hawke.

"I'm starting to like your brother, Varric," the pirate joked, from Hawke's other side "He reminds me of someone I know."

The three of them sniggered. Bethany rolled her eyes. Maker they really were like children sometimes. She had to admit though, it was always entertaining hanging around with Lana, Isabela and Varric. There was never a dull moment when the three of them got together. This expedition, however dangerous, would definitely not be boring. That was for sure.

Bartrand was still continuing with his speech.

"...It will take us a week to get to the depth we need..."

""Ahh, so many potential sexual references that I don't even know where to start," Isabela cried quietly to the other two, "I think this is my most favourite speech ever."Hawke and Varric broke into titters of laughter once more.

"...Big risks, Big rewards..."

"What could be better?" Lana said to Bartrand. "Life is boring without a little risk here and there."

"Exactly!" Bartrand exclaimed. "Now before we just have-What the?... Who invited the old woman?"

Hawke and the others turned in shock. Leandra was walking towards them, her face stained with tears. She looked beside herself with despair. Lana felt her jaw tighten at the sight of her. Her mother had been doing her best to avoid Hightown since they got here, unwilling to run into any of her old friends while she was living in the slums. Hawke couldn't believe her mother was going out of her way to try to ruin this for them now after all the work they had put in to get here.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, Ser Dwarf, but I need to speak with my daughter," Leandra said.

Lana couldn't help but notice that she used the single form of the word. She shook her head in disbelief. Bethany it seemed noticed it too. She reached out and placed a gentle, comforting hand on Lana's back before leaving the crowd and walking over to their mother. Hawke watched her go, wondering what this could be about, then decided to follow. This conversation was as much her business as anyone else's. Her mother owed her an explanation at least. Before Bethany could open her mouth Lana spoke.

"What do you want?" she demanded, "We've had this discussion already. Bethany is coming with me whether you like it or not."

Her mother looked beside herself. "I'm not letting this go," she cried, before turning to her youngest. "Don't _do _this, Bethany!" she pled, staring at her with fear in her eyes. Bethany sighed.

"I told you already, Mother. I want to go!" she said, frustrated at her mother's over protectiveness. The expedition had started to move off now, leaving only Hawke and her companions behind. They were watching the discussion between the three.

"You can't!" Leandra begged, "What if something was to happen to you? I can't lose you, Bethany."

"I'll be fine," Bethany implored. She turned to Lana then. "Let's go, Sister."

Hawke nodded and turned away without another look at her mother. She, Bethany and the others walked to catch up with the crowd. Suddenly they heard footsteps behind them. A hand grasped Lana's arm and spun her around. Leandra had grabbed a hold of her. She reached out and took Lana's other arm as well, gazing deeply into her eyes.

"Lana...You know I'm right," she said, shaking her lightly to try to get through to her, "She's only a girl. We've already lost your brother to the Darkspawn. Do you want to lose your sister as well?"

Lana stared into the sheer desperation in her mother's eyes. She couldn't deny that she feared for her sister's safety in the Deep Roads. Maker's Breath, she feared for all of them, even herself.

"I can't make Bethany's decisions for her," Hawke stated.

"Yes you can!" Leandra pressed, "She'll listen to you Lana. Order her to stay here. For me!"

Lana laughed once, bitterly. "For you?" she asked, gritting her teeth, "_Everything_ I'm doing is for you, Mother. The expedition, the estate, risking my life, stealing, scheming, killing..._Everything_ I have done in my entire life has been for you...And you don't even realise it."

Leandra faltered a bit under the effect of Lana's words. Even she could not deny the things Lana had done. "But none of it mattered in the end..." her mother said, fresh tears welling in her eyes. "We still lost Carver...lost our home. I'm giving you a chance to save something Lana, and you're throwing it away...just like you've thrown everything away...This isn't about with you've done, it's about what you haven't done. And you haven't done anything for this family worthy of remembrance."

Lana's mouth fell open slightly and she felt like she had been winded. She couldn't believe how low her mother rated her. Now the truth was out in the open for all to see. A few of her companions gasped. They were unaccustomed to hearing anyone speak to Hawke that way, and even more unaccustomed to seeing Hawke stand there and take it. If it was anyone else, heads would be rolling...literally. Leandra had crossed the line.

Hawke took a few shaky breaths to steady herself. Her mother's words had hit her like a ton of bricks.

"...Fine...you win," she said hoarsely. "Bethany can stay..."

So much was the wretchedness of the situation between Leandra and Hawke that Bethany didn't even complain. Her mouth fell open as she saw how defeated her sister looked. She couldn't believe that even after everything Leandra had just said, Lana was still trying to do right by their mother. Bethany had never had so much respect for her sister...and she had never had such a lack of respect for her mother.

"Thank you," Leandra said stiffly, releasing her grip on Lana. She turned her back to her and took Bethany by the arm, tugging her in the direction of Lowtown. Bethany lashed out, shaking out of her grip. She turned back and ran towards Lana, throwing her arms around her sister tightly. Lana reciprocated.

"Stay safe Bethany," she said softly, "I'll be back before you know it."

"You know I would have come with you..."

"I know," Lana replied dejectedly, "But its better this way..."

Bethany pulled back then and touched her sister's cheek. She could see the pain that Leandra had caused, etched there like a scar. She didn't deserve that. No one did. Bethany reached into her pack and produced the food which she had taken from Gamlen's house for their trip, handing it to her sister.

"Thanks," Lana said, taking it gratefully and putting it into her own pack. Bethany smiled at her. She didn't like being forced to stay behind but knew it would only hurt the already broken relationship between her sister and Leandra if she went. Her mother wouldn't blame _her_ for her choices, she would blame Lana and that didn't sit well with Bethany at all.

"Come Bethany," their mother said, prying her away from her older sister, "Lana has somewhere to go."

Bethany pulled off the red bandana tied around her neck and handed it to her sister.

"For luck," she said with a sad smile. Lana took it in her hand, staring down at it dejectedly. Her fist closed around it tightly.

"Thank you," she said looking back up at her sister.

Bethany gave her one last smile before allowing her mother to drag her along again. She stared back over her shoulder at Hawke who was standing helplessly, watching her go with regret.

"Mother?" Hawke called.

Leandra stopped and turned back, surprised. Lana was staring at her, sadness in her eyes.

"Yes?" her mother asked coldly. Several seconds passed between them. Leandra could see Lana struggle to say what was on her mind.

"If I should return..." Lana began. She swallowed over the lump in her throat and exhaled, "...Think better of me."

Without another word Hawke turned her back on her mother and the rest of her companions and began to walk in the direction of The Wounded Coast alone, her head hung. Everyone else had frozen behind her, uncomfortable with what they had just witnessed. Leandra stared after her eldest daughter as she walked into more danger for the goodness of her family, realising it could be the last time she ever saw her. She was shocked that Lana eventually gave in to her request. It was the right decision, but it still didn't make up for the many wrong ones she had made in the past.

Isabela was the first to move. She turned to Leandra Hawke and threw her a look of disgust before continuing after Lana, rushing to catch up with her. That had to be one of the most unpleasant conversations she had ever been subjected to, and the Rivaini had lived around pirates for years. There was nothing worse than seeing someone get beat down like that when they didn't deserve it, especially by their mother of all things. And Hawke definitely didn't deserve it. She was one of the bravest, strongest and smartest people Isabela had ever met. Not to mention unbelievably attractive and charming. So why then was she such a failure in her mother's eyes? Leandra wouldn't know what she had until she lost it, and then it would be too late.

As Isabela caught up with Hawke, the others followed behind having left Bethany, Leandra and Aveline in their wake. The pirate found it difficult to see Hawke look so detached from her normal self. She watched her tie Bethany's bandana around her neck, feel a strange sensation of anger run through her at the injustice of her friend's situation. Normally other people's lives and problems didn't have any effect on her. That was the way she preferred it, having no desire to interfere. But this was different. She couldn't help but feel some form of sympathy for the woman walking along ahead of her. She wasn't made of stone after all. Isabela reached out when she was close enough and touched her arm.

"Hawke wait..." she said, grabbing hold of her gently. Lana stopped and turned to look at her. "That was..." Isabela sighed. She wasn't good at this sort of thing.

"Forget it, Bela," Hawke answered back, "It's over..."

Isabela sighed and shook her head. "Don't let it get to you...You don't need her."

Hawke smiled as best she could, staring up to look at the Rivaini, "Thanks," she replied sincerely.

After a few seconds of silence, Isabela let her go as though she suffered from an electric shock. What in Andraste's flaming sword was she doing? This wasn't like her at all, what was she playing at? Confused, and a little annoyed with herself, she turned away at once and walked ahead without saying another word. Hawke caught up and fell into step beside her.

"Did I miss something?" she asked, puzzled by Isabela's change of pace and her sudden coldness. The pirate didn't look at her.

"Nope," she said bluntly, her tone becoming harsher once more, "I just get tired of people moping. It wears on me."

Lana snorted, "Oh, thanks" she said sarcastically, "I'll try to keep the moping to a minimum then."

Isabela turned to her and smiled, "If you'd be so kind."

Hawke continued curiously, "Only... correct me if I'm wrong...but was Isabela, the Sharpest Blade in Llomeryn, Queen of The Eastern Seas and feared raider among men and women alike trying to comfort little old me?"

"Oh shut up!" Isabela droned, shaking her head. She really wished she hadn't of said anything now. She had a feeling this was coming. One moment of weakness shown and she was now going to be subjected to the good-natured ribbing of her friends forever more. Hawke wasn't going to let her live this down.

"Aww," Hawke crooned, using a cooing baby voice. She put her arm around the Rivaini and rested her head on her shoulder, "Underneath all that sex appeal, charm, flirting and vulgar language you're just a warm-hearted, caring, little bunny wabbit."

"Oh get off me!" The pirate answered back, trying to hold back her smile and shrug out of Hawke's touch. She was beginning to get hot under the collar. "I won't hesitate to stick a dagger in you."

Lana began to laugh then. She released her arm from the around the pirate and continued to walk alongside her. Isabela was easier to wind up than she seemed. Any mention of her having a softer side and she immediately reaches for her weapons. Hawke would have to remember this event for future drinking sessions. She could already feel herself cheering up a little under the pirate's influence despite what had just happened back in the city. It seemed that whether Isabela did anything to warrant it or not, being around her automatically seemed to snap Lana back into a good mood.

* * *

They finally reached the tail-end of the expedition then, after having to fight their way through a few bandits along the way. Hawke said her goodbyes to Fenris who had walked with them to the cave entrance.

"Tell Anders I'll be paying him a visit when I get back," she said, angry at the mage for abandoning them when they needed him most. She would have rather had him along instead of Merrill. The Dalish elf was a bit of liability in a fight with her blood magic and Maker knows what they would encounter in the Deep Roads. Merrill didn't have much combat experience and her aim was a bit unpredictable. But they still needed a mage, and the Dalish Bloodmage was the only one left to them now.

"With pleasure," Fenris replied broodingly. "Good luck Hawke."

Lana watched him make his way back from where they came. She then led Varric, Merrill and Isabela up to the front of the small crowd which had stopped outside the entrance to the Deep Roads, concealed in the mountains.

"Personal trauma over with?" Bartrand greeted Hawke rudely. Varric sighed and scratched his head embarrassed at his brother's lack of tact. They were so different it was hard to imagine they were related. Bartrand was hot-headed and violent-natured while Varric was so easy-going and calm. It was going to be interesting travelling with them both under the same roof.

"Let's just get under way," Lana said, not answering his impertinent question.

"This has been a long time coming, eh Brother?" Varric asked as they lined up outside the tunnel, eyeing the road ahead with anticipation.

"That it has Varric, that it has... THE DEEP ROADS AWAIT!" Bartrand yelled loudly.

The crowd behind them cheered as they finally made their way forwards into the cave following the Tethras brothers. This was it. Hawke couldn't help but feel beside herself with excitement. Some of the men ran ahead to clear a path. As they entered further down the air became restricted making it difficult to breathe. Isabela could feel herself go light-headed. There was a foul smell in the air, reminding Hawke of Ferelden during the Blight. The dead bodies of Darkspawn had littered the streets back then. Right now there were no corpses to be seen but no one could escape that horrible smell of rotting flesh which seemed to ooze from the very stone that surrounded them.

"This place makes Lowtown smell nice," Hawke said, trying not to gag.

"Oh I don't like this," Isabela groaned, holding her torch high to examine the dark, endless road ahead.

"Scared, Bela?" Hawke joked. Varric and Merrill chuckled.

"As if!" Isabela admonished, offended by the thought, "I just...prefer to be out in the open air, having the wind beating off my face, sea water splashing up the sides of my ship, and a few dozen greased up sailors under my command."

Merrill gasped, "That certainly sounds exciting!"

Isabela smiled, "It's the best feeling in the world, Kitten," she said longingly. "This bloody Deep Roads expedition better pay up. I can't stay on dry land any longer. I'd hate to waste my time down here for nothing."

"Don't worry, Rivaini, Bartrand knows what he's doing," Varric said, "...I think."

Isabela laughed, "Thanks for the reassurance, Varric."

"Anytime."

* * *

They continued on through the winding tunnels for days on end, encountering no Darkspawn yet thankfully. Eventually the expedition reached a small clearing, providing them with alternative routes. Some of the tunnels ahead had collapsed however and the dwarves had been tunnelling for hours. Bartrand decided they should make camp for the night and continue onwards tomorrow once the roads were clear.

"Get a fire going!" he yelled to his men. "What am even I paying you Blighters for?"

The dwarf's mood had soured greatly over the last week or so and his underlings were paying the price for it. Varric had hung his head in shame as he watched his brother smack the dwarf in the face who told him about the collapsed tunnel. He was used to Bartrand's short temper but that didn't mean he approved of it.

The hired goons immediately began to stack wood for a fire and get to work on the tents before the dwarf exploded again. Hawke slid her pack off her back, feeling the burning ease as the pressure was lifted from her shoulders. She reached into her backpack and produced her own tent, setting it up quickly and unrolling her bedroll wanting nothing more than to collapse onto it. The others did the same beside her and they lit their own fire in the corner away from the others, keeping far out of Bartrand's way.

"So...Your brother's a bit of an asshole," Lana said to the dwarf.

Varric chuckled, "You're telling me, Hawke! He's always has been."

"You don't seem to like him very much."

"And here I thought you had to be a blood mage to read minds," the dwarf joked, "Makes me glad I was never born in Orzammar. I think that's where his bitterness comes from, growing up in these cramped tunnels with nothing but the smell of nug shit and body-odor."

"You weren't born in Orzammar?" Hawke asked chuckling.

"Great Ancestors, no!" Varric said with a rasping laugh, "I was born after my family were exiled, thank The Maker. Can't believe dwarves actually live down here voluntarily. What in blazes for?"

Hawke, Isabela and Merril laughed. Varric had a point.

When the camp was set the four of them cowered around the freshly lit fire which was now burning brightly, the shadows of the flames licking the walls of the Deep Roads beside them. A pot was hovering above it cooking them stew for dinner thanks to the food Bethany had given Lana back in Kirkwall. It wouldn't keep long before going stale. They had to eat it now. Hawke reached out towards the ladle to grab another bowl. As she did so her hand accidentally brushed against Isabela as she leaned over the Rivaini who was sitting beside her.

"Eh...Hawke?" The Pirate began slowly, "Did you just touch my breast?"

Hawke cringed, "Don't get excited Bela, it was an accident," she said as Varric chuckled loudly. Hawke had put her foot in it now though. She knew it. Isabela turned to her and threw her a sly smile.

"Of _course_ it was," she mocked, "I've seen you staring, you know, don't try to hide it Sweetness."

Hawke rolled her eyes, cursing her clumsiness. "Well I think everyone stares at them to be honest Bela, they're...how do you say? Very _in your face_."

Isabela looked down at her assets proudly, "Well, would you rather they be sagging at my feet? Honestly you're the first person to complain."

Varric and Merrill laughed.

"Oh I wish I could have your figure," Merrill moaned wistfully, "Compared to you I'm like a stale, dry biscuit."

"Oh hush Kitten!" Isabela said sympathetically as the mage stared down at her slim figure in disdain, "You need to have more confidence in yourself that's all. Plus, having a figure like mine isn't always a good thing. You become nothing but tits and ass to the men in taverns like The Hanged Man. And they won't hesitate to grab at either...Apparently neither will Hawke."

Merrill giggled innocently.

"For the last time Bela, it was an accident!" Lana declared, making the others laugh even harder. They could tell she felt a bit embarrassed.

"Aww, Hawke, are you blushing?" Isabela teased. Lana knew the pirate was getting her own back for all the teasing she had done the past week about the Rivaini being a big softie inside.

"Oh shut up and leave me along," she said, lowering her face, feeling it burn red.

Isabela laughed cheekily with Varric and Merrill, feeling satisfied that she had managed to make Hawke embarrassed. There was a first time for everything.

"But I thought we were sleeping together in your tent tonight?"

Hawke snorted, "We are...in separate beds."

"Oh Hawke, don't be ridiculous. I know you want to rest your weary head against my bosom..." Isabela answered with a grin, "...Feel he softness of my skin on your face, the touch of my delicate fingers as I run my hands over your-"

"Alright, I think on that note I'm calling it a night!" Hawke interrupted loudly, getting to her feet as the others laughed at Isabela's words. Hawke shook her head, chuckling a little herself.

"Oh Hawke don't be such a bore!" Isabela said, "I was only getting started."

"I know!" Hawke said pointedly, "I'd rather spare myself the details."

Isabela got to her feet and reached out, running a hand down Lana's arm seductively. "Oh, Hawke, stop pretending you're all innocent now...We both know you've done things which would make other people's toes curl."

Hawke laughed quietly, staring at Isabela's hand as it slid up her arm. She looked into the Rivaini's piercing amber eyes then. She hesitated for a second, before leaning in closer, giving Isabela a taste of her own medicine, pausing inches away from her face. Isabela was taken aback slightly, but didn't back away.

"And...what if I have?" Lana whispered to her, grinning mischievously.

Isabela stared back, a wicked look appearing in her eyes. Her smile widened, pleased with the direction this conversation had taken. "Mmm," she groaned, "There's no 'what ifs' about it Sweetness...I can guess."

Merrill and Varric watched with wide eyes as the two women stood inches apart, gazing at each other intensely. They weren't sure whether this was just another of their antics or if the pirate and Hawke really were being serious this time. You could cut the sexual tension with a knife.

"Then... can you guess what I'm going to do next?" Hawke asked softly, exhaling seductively in Isabela's embrace. She ran her hands up along the woman's bare arms and rested her hands on her shoulders. Isabela ran her tongue over her lips, anticipating the kiss from Hawke as she leaned in slowly once more. The woman paused, her mouth merely centimetres away from the Rivaini's.

Unable to wait patiently, Isabela moved towards her, her mouth watering with anticipation. Suddenly she made contact...with Hawke's fingers. The woman had brought up her hand and pressed the pirate's lips tightly, holding off her kiss. Isabela frowned in confusion.

"I'm going to bed," Lana said, answering her own question bluntly.

The sexual atmosphere was broken at once. Varric and Merrill buckled over in laughter as Hawke pulled away from the pirate, leaving her standing there in shock and disappointment.

"Oh, you bitch!" Isabela exclaimed in disbelief after Hawke as she strut away towards her tent, laughing..

"Good night, Isabela!" Lana called back mockingly.

The pirate groaned. She had really got her going there. The woman was such a tease. Lana pulled back to cover of her tent and climbed inside, still laughing to herself, feeling satisfied for getting her own back. She was back in control, having really had the Rivaini singing to her tune there. A part of her had been tempted to steal a kiss but it would annoy Isabela more if she built up the tension then gave her nothing in the end (except for the accidental boob-graze of course). Maker's Breath that latest flirtatious encounter had been fun! Lana pulled back her covers and lay down in her bedroll, resting her 'weary head' as Isabela had put it. She smiled to herself as she stared up at the roof of her tent, her heart still beating loudly in her chest as it did every time Isabela gave her that intense, passionate look that both enthralled her and also scared her at the same time. The next few days would be interesting, waiting for the Rivaini to plan her next attack. For this one had backfired on her perfectly...and like it or not, she was eager for more.


	8. Chapter 8

"So...Hawke..."

Isabela turned to look at Lana as they explored one of the side tunnels of The Deep Roads beside their camp together. The others had stayed behind to make breakfast while she and Hawke scoped out any possible paths to continue their halted expedition. One night of camp with Bartrand was enough. The dwarf was a noble piece of shit with no respect for anyone and they were all eager to collect their treasure and be done with him. The Deep Roads were unpleasant enough without having bad company as well. Lana turned and met the Rivaini's gaze, feeling slightly wary as to what the nature of this conversation would be. The sly smirk on the Rivaini's face told her she was up to something. Wasn't she always though?

"What?" Hawke asked suspiciously, her eyes narrowing. Isabela giggled back cheekily.

"Did you know that you talk in your sleep?" she said innocently.

Lana cursed inwardly. Oh Maker what had she said? There was only one thing that could make the pirate smile in that way. Curse her for not having her own tent! Lana wasn't used to sleeping in front of people who weren't family. She had been told on occasion about her sleep talking but had never considered it a big deal before. Up until now that was. Bethany usually kept it to herself, unless her sister had said something extremely funny that night. Hawke had a feeling that Isabela wouldn't bring it up out of the blue just to remind her of a witty word or phrase she had used. Lana had said something different this time, she knew it. She did remember having some sort of dream last night but she couldn't recall what it had been about. Hawke hoped desperately it didn't involve Sister Leliana again. That would just hand Isabela too much information to play with, and she already had enough as it was.

"I...I do?" Hawke replied, uncertain how to respond. Isabela's smile widened.

"Oooh yes," she said with satisfaction, "You said something _interesting_ last night...and believe me Sweetness, it had nothing to do with Carver this time."

The pirate sniggered to herself and turned her gaze forward. Lana stopped walking and began to examine the Deep Roads map in her hand.

"Is that so?" she asked, scanning the piece of parchment pretending not to be phased by Isabela's words. She was desperately wrecking her brain to remember her dream. It definitely wasn't a wet one...was it? Isabela stopped beside her and peered at the map over her shoulder. She knew the Rivaini had no interest in what was on it. She was just placing her self closer to her, trying to make her sweat under the pressure and anticipation of being the source of interest for her. Lana could feel Isabela's warm breath on her neck, making her quiver slightly. She tried to ignore it, concentrating on being indifferent to their conversation. Let the pirate have her little games. Lana still had the upper hand over her.

"Uh huh," The Rivaini continued in her ear, "It was of a..._sexual_ nature."

Lana froze. Her eyes were no longer focused on the map. She was staring at the same spot as Isabela hovered beside her.

"Really?" Lana asked, trying not to sound worried. "And...What exactly did I say?"

Isabela chuckled seductively, "It was...more of a question actually...a request..."

Lana cringed. "For whom?" she asked, already beginning to guess the answer.

The Rivaini reached up and slid her fingers under Lana's long brown hair and trickled her fingers along the back of her neck. Lana was still refusing to look at her, pretending to be searching for a way out of the tunnel. In actual fact, she was searching for a way out of this conversation. She felt strangely exposed because of it.

"For me," Isabela said, smirking slyly, "You mentioned my name..._moaned_ it actually."

Lana's heart began to beat frantically. She could feel herself become hot under Isabela's gaze.

"And...the question?" Hawke asked, dreading to think what she could have possibly asked the busty pirate for. There had been plenty of questions running through her mind as to what Isabela would be into sexually but she had never dreamt of them before or even entertained the ideas fully. Isabela exhaled, leaning in closer to Hawke's ear.

"How about I just..._reply..." _she said alluringly.

The Rivaini leaned in and nibbled the bottom of Lana's earlobe. Hawke felt her hand falter on the map, allowing it to fall slightly. Isabela's fingers continued to caress gently along the back of her neck, then began to travel down her spine. Lana swallowed hard. Her breath caught as Isabela's hand reached her lower back. The Rivaini felt her quiver under her touch.

"Are you sure you can handle an answer?" she whispered teasingly, her hand hovering dangerously close to its destination. Hawke's breath caught. After several seconds, Isabela took her silence for a 'yes' and slide her hand slowly under the seam at the back of Hawke's pants, exploring some uncharted territory. The hand slipped further then, running along the firm, tense ass Isabela had so longed after last night. She grasped firmly.

Lana jumped. The Deep Road's map dropped to the ground and she spun her body to face the Rivaini fully, causing Isabela's hand to slide out from under her clothes to rest on her waist instead. They stared at each other unblinkingly. Isabela grinned, turned on by the latest feel she had copped. It was only a matter of time before Hawke would just give in. She couldn't win now.

Hawke's jaw tightened. She placed a hand on Isabela's shoulder and walked forwards, backing the Rivaini up against the nearest wall forcefully. Isabela gasped as her back pressed against the cold, hard, damp rock. Her eyes lit up, seeing the dangerous look in Lana's dark brown eyes. The pirate's smile widened, aroused by the rough handling and the obvious anger building behind Lana's stare. Rough sex was always a favourite of the Rivaini's. She didn't dare move an inch, waiting to see what Lana was going to do next, her excitement increasing. Hawke placed her hands on either side of the wall behind the pirate, trapping her there. She leaned in.

"That," she said threateningly through gritted teeth, "is the last time you will ever touch my ass, got it?"

Isabela's smile faltered. "What?" she exclaimed, confused. This hadn't turned out the way she'd hoped. Hawke looked furious.

"I mean it," she continued, her temper rising, "We can flirt all you want Bela, make dirty jokes, sexual references, Maker you can even nibble on my ear lobe when you get the urge...but the moment you slip your hand under my clothes and fondle my ass... we have a problem."

Isabela looked taken aback. "And...What problem is that exactly?" she asked, feeling slightly awkward. Had she taken it one step too far? Lana's face became angrier at the fact that she had to ask. She slammed her hand against the rock, hard.

"What's the problem?" she exclaimed heatedly. "The problem is that your hands are just too damn _cold _Rivaini!"

A moment of tense silence past. Then Isabela frowned, puzzled.

"WHAT?" she blurted, utterly perplexed by Hawke's answer. Had she heard her right? Much to her surprise, Lana began to snigger. She leaned back, releasing the Rivaini from where she had her pinned against the wall and doubled over in fits of laughter. Isabela was staring at her in amazement, still trying to understand what had just happened. Did she just get told off?

"I almost had you!" Lana laughed, holding her side, "You should have seen your face!"

Isabela straightened up off the wall. She shook her head then, her jaw dropping as she realised that Lana had been playing her from the start. The pirate groaned and began to hit her playfully, everywhere that she could reach.

"Oh, you _asshole_ Hawke!" she shouted, beating Lana as she continued laughing, "You complete son of a bitch!"

"Ouch! Stop it!" Lana shouted, covering herself up from the Rivaini's continuous jabs, still giggling at her misfortune.

"You had me thinking you'd turned into Aveline there!" Isabela joked. "Maker's breath I thought you were being serious!"

The pirate began to laugh with her then at her own expense, seeing the funny side at last. She had to admit that Lana had her going for a second. Isabela hadn't been scolded like that since the last time she saw her mother. The pirate wrapped her arms around Hawke and wrestled the joker to the ground, getting her own back.

"Arghh!" Lana complained as she hit the cold ground. Isabela's weight fell on top of her. "Get off me you scurvy bugger!"

"Oy!" Isabela complained, hitting her once more. They stopped struggling then. Isabela leaned on her elbows and stared down at Lana, both of them catching their breaths. She ran her hand through the woman's hair, brushing it from her face. "Don't start talking like a pirate, Sweetness. It's not becoming."

Lana chuckled, looking up into the eyes of the Rivaini. "Hmm, you're right, it takes a different type of talk for one to 'be coming'."

Both women chuckled. Lana smirked smugly. She really enjoyed winding Isabela up. She sighed, reaching up to touch Isabela's face, caressing it with her hand. She was extremely aware of the woman's assets pressed up against her own, the warmness of her skin underneath her clothes. Isabela shook her head and took Lana's hand from her face.

"Don't go and get all intimate on me now," she said, pinning the hand over Lana's head instead. She grabbed her other one and did the same rendering Hawke powerless beneath her. "Let's not pretend that either of us is looking for more than what's on the surface."

Lana gave her a cheeky smile "Well, what else is there to look for?" she asked lightly. "I assume love isn't part of your vocabulary?"

"It was," Isabela answered truthfully, "but then I realised I didn't need it anymore...Love isn't for everyone, it's not for me...I only need one thing to keep me satisfied..."

"And what is that?" Hawke asked, knowing full well.

Isabela grinned then leaned down slowly, towards her face. Lana's swallowed. She lifted her head slightly, anticipating the Rivaini's kiss, the soft lips on hers, the taste of her tongue as it ran along her own. She closed her eyes, just like Isabela, each of them finally willing to submit to the other after months of endless games and pranks. It was the first time their flirting hadn't just been an attempt to break the other's will. This time it was genuine, from both women, without them even realising. Their drew closer, until nothing but the warmness of their long breaths separated them, seconds away from their first real kiss.

"Enchantment?"

The two women paused, their lips almost touching. Their eyes sprung open, eyebrows narrowed in bewilderment. They turned simultaneously to Isabela's left. There, standing in the corner, a giant frozen ogre behind him, stood a tiny dwarf lad with electric blue eyes and bright straw coloured hair. He was wearing a wide, innocent smile on his face, drool dripping from the corner of his mouth, a lantern in one hand, holding out a small grey rock to them with the other.

"Sandal?" Hawke asked in surprise. She recognized him from the expedition. He was the child of the merchant Bodhan who had tagged along with them, offering discounted supplies.

"Andraste's ass, what the-? How long has he been there for?" Isabela exclaimed, pulling her face away from Hawke's and sitting up straight.

"BOOM!" Sandal answered, still smiling his dozy little smile. Hawke tried not to laugh.

"How did you do that?" she asked kindly, pointing to the giant ogre behind him. Sandal glanced up at the ogre which was over ten times his size before turning back to Lana.

"Not enchantment," he replied simply, before walking off back in the direction of camp. The two women watched him go in amazement. Lana looked back up at Isabela then, who was still sitting on top of her. The pirate returned her look of awe. A tiny dwarf had just taken out the same thing which had killed Carver without so much as breaking a sweat.

"Smart boy," Hawke said in wonder. Isabela nodded, eyes wide.

"You don't say," she replied. The grin appeared on her face once more then. "Now where were we?" She leaned down again, eager to pick up where they left off.

Suddenly a horrible gurgling scream echoed from the nearby tunnels. Isabela paused. She and Lana stared at each other, each straining to listen. More shrieking followed. The pirate straightened up at once, Lana following. They both glanced towards the nearby passages of The Deep Roads. Shadows were forming on the walls around them, thanks to the numerous lanterns placed on the walls by the expedition's hired diggers. If the shadows were disturbing it was nothing compared to the long rattling breaths which were echoing up from the tunnels around them. Isabela jumped to her feet at once, grabbing Lana's hand and helping her to hers. The two women pulled out their daggers simultaneously, adrenaline surging through them. The horde was getting nearer.

"Guess we'll have to continue this later," Hawke said, turning her back to Isabela. The pirate pressed her back against Lana's, giving them a three hundred and sixty degree view of their surroundings.

"Looking forward to it," The pirate replied from behind her, swinging her daggers, anticipating the oncoming danger.

Both women raised their weapons in expectation as Darkspawn came pouring out of the blackness, swarming in on them from all angles, leaving them with no escape.

* * *

"Maker's Breath what happened to you two!?"

Isabela and Hawke stood before a bewildered Varric and Merril, completely dripping with black blood, their weapons held limply at their sides, trying to catch their breaths.

"Well," Hawke began, "We found the Darkspawn."

"Or rather they found us," Isabela added, looking at her clothes in disgust. Varric began to chuckle. They had been on the road for just over a week and had seen not one sign of Darkspawn. Trust Hawke and Isabela to find a horde of them first. The two women were just magnets for trouble.

"There must be an opening here,"" Hawke continued, handing the dwarf the bloodstained map and pointing to the tunnel the Darkspawn attacked from. "We can proceed further in by going this way. I think it's worth a shot."

Isabela emptied her flask of water over herself, washing away the tainted blood. She tossed some over Lana as well who wasn't expecting it. Hawke spluttered and choked as Varric darted to the side, holding up the map which had gotten splashed as well, trying to dry it out.

"Andraste's ass Bela, a little head's up would have been nice!" Lana complained, wiping her eyes. The pirate sniggered and entered their tent, searching for a cloth to clean the blood off them.

"Where's the fun in that?" she called over her shoulder. Lana rolled her eyes.

"I'll let Bartrand know there's an open tunnel nearby," Varric said, "The sooner we get moving the better. He's been pissing me off all d-Hey Bartrand! We found a way around your damn cave in!"

The dwarf changed his choice of words as his elder brother approached. He walked away towards him, drawing the grumpy git away from the rest of them, winking back at Hawke and Merrill over his shoulder. They both chuckled.

Bodhan and Sandal approached then from another direction. They were staring up at Lana with massive grins.

"Hello," Lana said, catching the cloth Isabela threw at her and beginning to siphon blood from her clothes.

"Oh you've no idea how pleased I am that you found my son Sandal!" Bodhan exclaimed, "I'm afraid he wandered off. I was so worried he'd-But he's safe now! I won't forget this I swear!"

"It was no trouble, Bodhan," Hawke said, waving her hand. He had sort of found them to be honest.

"Even so," the dwarf continued, "I owe you a debt for bringing him back, my friend. Say thank you to the kind lady for saving your life Sandal."

Bodhan ushered young Sandal forwards. The boy looked up at Lana with those bright, blue eyes, both of them knowing that Lana hadn't really needed to do anything at all. All she was responsible for was leading him home through the right tunnel and even that was by accident as he had seen where she and Isabela had come from.

"Thank you, kind lady," he said. Lana smiled down at him and patted his shoulder. The dwarf grabbed her outstretched hand and placed something in it. Hawke looked down surprised. It was the stone that Sandal had used to freeze the giant ogre. He smiled up at her.

"BOOM!"

Lana closed her fist around the stone and nodded her head in thanks to the young lad before Bodhan ushered him away.

They packed up their tents and waited for Bartrand to gather the expedition goons. It took them half an hour to get sorted before they were ready to take off. Hawke and Isabela used this time to catch up on breakfast. Neither of them mentioned what had happened between them earlier, or rather what would have happened if Sandal and the Darkspawn hadn't of interrupted them. Isabela was slightly worried by the gentle, caring hand which Hawke had placed on her face, the mention, however small of the word love. Hawke was apprehensive about the idea of having sex with Isabela voluntarily, without being under the influence of alcohol and having it to blame for her actions. The games were all well and good, but what happened in the end when you eventually won? Both women were beginning to realise that maybe what they had considered a win was something completely different from the reality.

Lana ate a piece of bread while staring down at the stone Sandal had given her. So this little rock was the difference between her brother being dead or alive. If only she had had one two years ago back in Lothering. Carver would be griping in her ear right now, complaining about the expedition and life in Kirkwall, rather than rotting on the mountains surrounding Lothering beside the corpse of Aveline's husband. Bethany wouldn't have lost her twin brother as well as her father at such a young age. And then there was Leandra. She wouldn't think of her eldest daughter as a failure and their once healthy relationship would be unbroken and unchanged, exactly as it had been back home when Lana's mother could look directly into her eyes with nothing more than love and pride. That look had long since died though, along with Carver. Hawke sighed and stowed the tiny enchanted stone in her pack before getting to her feet. The rest of the expedition was ready to go. Maker help any Darkspawn ogre that approached Hawke down here. It was time to get revenge for Carver's death. She was going to enjoy this. There was no way this expedition was going to get added to another of Lana's failures in the eyes of her mother. She was going to prove to Leandra that she wasn't as worthless as the woman imagined she was. The Hawke family would regain their honour. Lana would make sure of it.

The four of them led the way along with Bartrand, back to the Deep Road tunnels they had just came from. The grumbling expedition behind them held their breath as they passed the numerous Darkspawn corpses strewn across the ground courtesy of Isabela and Hawke. Lana didn't even flinch at the stench. She was becoming used to it already. Maker, that was a scary thought, feeling almost at home in the Deep Roads. Lowtown did smell better, but only a little.

Lana stole a glance at Isabela out of the corner of her eye. She couldn't believe that she had almost kissed her. No, that wasn't it. She couldn't believe that she had actually _wanted_ to kiss her. She knew what Isabela was. A pirate, a raider, a killer, a stealer...a sex-crazed, untrustworthy piece of work who would probably stab her in the back the first chance she got to get her ship back and then set sail without a seconds thought. No one would approve of them sleeping together, least of all Lana herself. So what had happened to keeping the Rivaini at arm's length? Instead, she was inviting her in, opening herself up bit by bit to someone she knew would eventually hurt her in the end. She had to do a better job at controlling her urges. It had just been so long since she had been touched by another woman, been comforted by hands which claimed her for their own even just for an hour or two. Hawke shook her head, ridding herself of the confusing thoughts which were floating around there and continuing onwards, leading the expedition to what would hopefully be treasure beyond measure and a quick way out of shitty Lowtown life.


	9. Chapter 9

The expedition travelled for another week, using the side tunnels to go around the collapse which had momentarily halted their progress. Bartrand, Hawke, Varric, Isabela and Merrill led the way, following an alternative route which the map had thankfully provided. Varric couldn't help but notice that the Rivaini and Lana were deliberately walking on opposite sides of him, as though using him as a barrier between them. He found it odd too that their conversations were lacking in the usual sexual content they normally had in abundance (bar one or two innuendos here and there). The dwarf said nothing though. If Bethany had have been here he might have brought it up, asking for her opinion on the matter, but alas there was only Merrill.

The young Dalish mage was strolling along behind him, humming cheerfully under her breath as though they were all just at a relaxing picnic on the beach rather than wading their way through dangerous, Darkspawn-filled tunnels, lucky to have even made it this far without anyone being killed. Varric often wondered how the little mage survived in Kirkwall. She was as cute as a button, pleasant to everyone, without a single bad bone in her body...well, apart from the whole Blood Mage thing. Varric shook his head. How in the Maker's name did Daisy make a deal with a demon when she couldn't even find her way home without using a ball of twine? The dwarf chuckled to himself. Merrill was as naive as they came. He wouldn't trouble her with his suspicions about Lana and the Rivaini. Why break the perfect little bubble she lived in?

Hawke and Isabela had distanced themselves from each other for the past week, each of them reluctant to talk about how they had nearly had sex in the middle of The Deep Roads (and unknowingly in front of Sandal). Maker, that would have been an 'enchantment' alright! It had recently occurred to both women that their impending kiss had meant something a little more than winning a mere game of seduction, and they had become slightly freaked out by the idea that they had both wanted it there and then despite that fact. Isabela believed that Hawke was starting to have feelings for her which went deeper than plain old lust which was why Lana was willing to kiss her back that time, while Hawke was busy trying to remind herself that having sex with Isabela was a really bad idea and that she just had a momentary lapse in concentration as the pirate took her unawares. Of course, neither woman voiced her concerns to the other. Talking about feelings wasn't really their style. Maker, perish the thought! An emotional conversation of that caliber and one of them was sure to vomit, if not both. So naturally, both women shied away from the topic entirely, unwilling to admit that no matter what ulterior motives lay behind that kiss, they still wanted nothing more than to tear off each others clothes and have rough, passionate sex together (bad idea or not).

Bartrand held up his hand then, and the expedition came to a stop. They had just entered a massive clearing, completely unlike any part of The Deep Roads they had seen so far. Something was moving nearby.

"What's wrong?" Hawke asked, walking over to the dwarf.

"Don't you hear that?" Bartrand whispered, looking up at her. Lana saw a look of worry in his eyes. Suddenly there was another scurrying sound. A ripple of fear spread throughout the expedition hirelings. They muttered and shifted their weight.

"Quiet you idiots!" Bartrand admonished.

Hawke and the rest of her companions scanned their surroundings. The sound was getting closer. Lana closed her eyes, trying to place it. She began to take a few steps away from the group. The others looked at her curiously.

"Hawke?" Isabela whispered, "What in the Maker's name are you doing?"

Lana turned to her and raised a finger to her lips, silencing her. She backed herself slowly towards the nearest wall, staring at her companions with a crazy look in her eye. The pirate was wondering why she was acting so strangely, as were the others. Once Lana's back was an inch away from the wall, she stopped.

"Hawke?" Merrill asked in a terrified squeak, "...You're scaring me!"

The scurrying sound happened again then. This seemed to be what Hawke was anticipating. With lightening-quick reflexes she spun around and reached into the hole in the wall behind her.

"Gotcha!" she shouted.

Some of the hirelings yelled and jumped back as Lana dragged out of the shadows a struggling Dragonling, both hands wrapped around its neck as it screeched and thrashed, trying to escape.

"DRAGON!" a scared digger cried, pointing to Lana as she wrestled the thing to the ground. The entire expedition backed away as far as they could, even Hawke's companions. What were they so afraid of? It was only a damn Dragonling. With one swift movement Lana wrung the creature's neck, killing it instantly. The crack echoed throughout the tunnels. She stood up straight and turned to the others happily.

"Relax," she said unfazed, wondering why they were still backing away, "It's dead."

Isabela pointed behind her, "HAWKE RUN!" she shouted.

Suddenly there was a deafening roar from the tunnel, louder by far than anything down here so far. Hawke's breath caught, her eyes wide. She turned to look behind her, just on time to see a fireball melt the rock and travel up the tunnel towards her. Lana instinctively dived to the side, dodging the flames and landing roughly on the ground. She felt her skin cut on the rocks as she reached out to cushion herself. There were agonizing screams behind her as the fire reached the remains of the expedition. Lana looked up from where she lay. A dwarf was running towards her, completely engulfed in flames, another was rolling in the dirt trying to extinguish himself. Seeing Isabela, Merrill and Varric safely hidden behind a wall, she turned back to where the flames had come from to see the source of the fire. Standing at the end of the direction they had been heading stood a dragon the size of a small house. Holy Maker!

Hawke jumped to her feet as she saw more flames build in its throat. She dived into a crack in the wall, feeling the flames surge past her, the unbearable heat as it scorched its way up the tunnel once more. Lana was breathing heavily now.

"HAWKE?"

"I'm here Varric," Lana replied, hearing the dwarf's voice echo down the tunnel towards her. She couldn't see the others from her position, "I'm fine."

"We need to clear the path. There's a horde of Dragonlings behind us so there's no going back. The rest of the expedition is battling them as we speak so we need to hurry."

"Shit!" Lana cursed to herself.

"Any ideas?" Isabela called out.

Hawke whipped out the Deep Roads map and checked it. The slim tunnel that she was in now happened to lead down to where the Dragon was. She couldn't believe she was actually considering this but there was no other way. Maker, this was insane!

"Just one!" Hawke called back, stowing the map back in her pack, "But it's a long shot! I need to distract the Dragon. Keep its attention focused on you."

"What are you going to do?" Isabela called, intrigued. Lana laughed.

"You'll see, Rivaini! Just try not to get that pretty face of yours burnt! It's your only asset after all what with your vulgar language."

She heard Isabela's laugh echo off the walls. "You'll pay for that!"

Another blast of fire flew up the tunnel past them all. Lana cursed to herself, pressing her back to the wall once more. Sweat was dripping from her body already, brought on by the gathering heat in the tunnels.

"How exactly do you expect us to distract it?" Isabela asked, "Dance naked in front of it, singing the Rim of Gold?"

Lana chuckled. "I think that would just distract me!" she called back. Laughter from her three companions echoed down the tunnel once more. "Just...buy me a bit of time! Flash you're ass, give it some food, talk dirty to it, seduce it...Anything!"

"Alright," The pirate called back laughing, "We'll think of something. Just tell us when."

"Ok...ready?" Hawke asked, "NOW!"

The Dragon screeched once more and began moving closer to the tunnel. What every the others were doing had certainly peaked its interest. Hawke dropped her pack to the ground and made her way down the tiny passage way she was in, withdrawing her daggers as she did so. She could hear numerous fireballs being aimed at her companions back in the main tunnel. The ground here was treacherous and steep, causing Lana to lose her footing several times before finally making it out the other side.

Sliding along the wall to the exit, Lana tried to catch her breath. When she reached the edge she peaked out. She was right in line with the Dragon, about ten yards away. The beast was staring up the other tunnel, throwing more flames at its irritators. Isabela did tend to have that effect. The woman had a talent for irritating things and she knew certainly how to use it. Aveline would readily agree to that. Lana took another look at the Dragon before pulling her head back in again, unable to believe what she was about to do.

"Shit!" she whispered, psyching herself out, "Shit, shit, shit!...Lana you are a crazy ass bitch! What in Andraste's holy knickers are you thinking?"

She took one last peek out at the Dragon and hid again, laying her head back against the wall, her breathing becoming heavy. She reached up and grasped tightly the red bandana which Bethany had given her before she left. Her sister never did like Dragons.

Lana exhaled, "This is for you, Bethany."

Without another seconds hesitation Hawke ran out from her hiding place. She sprinted as fast as she could towards the Dragon, a dagger held in each hand. As soon as she was close enough she leapt. The Dragon reared its head and let out a roar as it felt Lana land on its back. It flapped its wings angrily, trying to throw her off. Lana, still holding her daggers, used the scales on the Dragon's back to climb up along its spine. Suddenly a wing caught her hand. One of her blades slipped from her grasp and clattered along the floor. With no time to spare she navigated her way along the thrashing Dragon's back and seated herself between its wings as though riding a horse. She raised her remaining dagger in the air with both hands and plunged it into the beasts back. Blood bubbled beneath her blade and began to pour out of the wound. The Dragon threw back its head and cried out in pain. It began bashing into the nearby rocks, trying to throw Hawke off even more now. This time it succeeded. Lana's head cracked off the tunnel wall and she fell to the ground unconscious.

Isabela, Merrill and Varric saw her fall and they sprinted the length of the melting passageway to finish the Dragon off before it noticed Lana was at its feet. There was no need though. The Dragon opened its mouth, ready for one last attack as it saw the others approaching, before staggering on the spot and falling to the ground in a heap, shaking the entire Deep Roads with its weight.

"HAWKE!" Isabela shouted. The three of them ran towards her as fast as they could. The pirate kneeled down beside her and shook her roughly. There was blood pouring from the back of her head where she had cracked it off the rock.

"Oh Hawke!" Merrill cried, "Please wake up!"

"She'll be fine Daisy," Varric comforted, "She's just unconscious."

"Know any healing spell's, Kitten?" Isabela asked. Merrill nodded.

"I'll try," she said, kneeling down beside Isabela. "I don't think the cut will heal but I can at least bring her round I think."

The Dalish mage held out her staff and began muttering incantations. A blast of blue light then soared from the tip and was absorbed by Hawke. The woman then began to stir. She opened her eyes slowly and straightened up slightly. Her hand reached up to touch her head and she looked at the blood on her hand.

"Sore head?" Isabela asked jokingly. The pirate was smirking down at her. Lana returned the smile through her grimace.

"Maker, what is it with me hitting my head on things?" she replied, "Seriously, if it's not a headboard then it's just not worth it!"

Isabela and Varric burst out laughing. The pirate stood up then and reached out a hand, pulling Lana to her feet. Hawke stumbled forwards slightly, still a bit dazed.

"Wow!" she breathed, loosing her balance. Isabela caught her, reaching under her arms as she came at her face first. Their bodies pressed together as Lana tied to straighten herself. Isabela raised her up. The two women looked at each other, their faces close. A moment of tense silence passed between them. Hawke blinked once, trying to focus her eyes.

"Oh great," she said, "I'm seeing two of you now. As if one of you wasn't enough."

"Hey!" Isabela said, chuckling slightly, "Don't think I won't give you another blow to the head."

Lana chuckled, pulling back from the Rivaini, who still held her arms outstretched in case she should stumble again. Hawke groaned and rubbed her temples.

"Ugh...I need a drink," she said, shaking her head slightly.

"You're a crazy bastard Hawke, I'll give you that!" Varric said proudly.

Hawke chuckled. "Now you'll have a real story to tell about me."

The dwarf considered this. "You're right. I think I'll add a few more Dragon's to be on the safe side though...and maybe a few Darkspawn Hurlocks, you know...just to even the playing field."

The four of them laughed.

"The day you tell a true story, Varric, will be the day that Anders kisses a Templar," Hawke replied. The dwarf chuckled behind her as they made their way over to Bartrand and the rest of the expedition who had just appeared in the clearing. One of the hirelings had Lana's pack. He handed it to her.

"By my ancestors!" The dwarf said, staring up at the Dragon's corpse. "I didn't think that was possible."

"Anything's possible when you've got Hawke flying around," Varric replied, "Oo that's a good line. Remind me to write that one down."

Hawke chuckled. "Well," she began, lifting her dagger from the ground and pulling the other from the Dragon. "Shall we get a move on?"

"You'll need to cover that cut, Hawke," Merrill said, "Darkspawn can taint your blood though open wounds. It happened one of our hunters before, back in Ferelden."

Hawke sheathed her weapons and took Bethany's bandana from around her neck. She wrapped it tightly around her head, covering the bleeding cut and tied it at the nape of her neck, flicking her hair out from under it.

"Stealing my look?" Isabela teased, gesturing to her own blue bandana on her head. Lana chuckled.

"You've influenced me," she joked, "You know, I think I'm going to get pair of those great big gold earrings you're wearing and pierce my lip as well."

Isabela, Varric and Merrill laughed.

"I'd be happy to _pierce_ you," Isabela replied with a wink. Lana giggled.

"I bet you would."

"Alright," Bartrand interrupted, staring from one woman to the other as though wanting nothing more than to see that happen. And he wasn't the only one. Half the men in the expedition were staring at Lana and Isabela with wide eyes as though their wildest dream was about to come true. "Let's just...get going again before I get distracted."

* * *

"Holy shit!" Varric exclaimed.

Bartrand paused, a look of amazement in his eyes. They had just appeared at a massive clearing after travelling for an hour. It was made of red stone which almost seemed to light the path ahead. This part of the Deep Roads was different from the rest. It seemed like it hadn't been touched in centuries and yet everything still looked shiny and new.

"Is this what you were expecting?" Hawke asked Bartrand. He seemed to be more entranced than the others.

"I thought...and abandoned thaig, something old but...what is this?" he said.

"Did you know it was here?" Lana asked.

"Not for certain," Bartrand replied, still not able to peel his gaze from the view, "Heard about it in old scavenger tales after the Third Blight. A week below the surface they said...at least it would have been if we hadn't had to take so many damn detours...But nobody believed them."

Hawke hadn't realised that when they set off on this expedition, Bartrand had had some idea of what he wanted to find, some specific direction he wanted to go. She had thought it was just a blind treasure hunt. Lana felt uneasy then, wondering if there was anything else that she didn't know about.

"Look's like they were right," Varric said.

"Make camp here!" Bartrand ordered to the others, "...We need to take a look around."

The expedition hirelings began to unpack the tents as the five of them made their way forwards, eager to check this place out. They dropped their tents for the others to pitch while they explored. It was odd. There were no statues of paragons as was usually the case with dwarven thaigs. The walls had strange markings which even Bartrand didn't recognise and there was a cool breeze drifting through the entire place as though there was an opening to the surface nearby. It was a little unsettling. Bartrand stopped to examine some ruins while Hawke and her companions went on ahead. They reached another clearing, bearing the same architecture as the last one.

"Hmm, this one looks still intact," Varric said as they made their way down the slope, "Think we'll find anything?"

Lana smirked, hearing the sceptical tone in the dwarf's voice, "Doubting your brother's good judgement, Varric?"

"This entire place gives me the chills," Isabela said.

"Maybe you should wear pants for a change then," Lana said, smirking at her.

"Oh ha ha!" the pirate replied, grinning back cheekily, "Don't act like you want me to, Sweet thing. We both know you'd be lying."

Lana chuckled and turned back to the way ahead. "Well, let's get down and see what we can find."

"Hopefully it's worth it," Varric said. His unenthusiastic tone unsettled Hawke. Something told them all that they needed to be extra cautious down here. This area wasn't like the others. It was foreign, and none of them wanted to be taken by surprise. The continued onwards, weapons at the ready.

After around half an hour or so, they came to a door. Hawke pulled the latch, surprised to find it opening at her touch. This was too easy. She threw and uncertain stare at Varric before pushing it open fully. Inside was a stair case which led to some kind of altar. The four of them entered the room through the open door and ascended the stairs, immediately becoming entranced by the stone plinth in front of them. Something was shining from it.

When they reached the top of the long staircase the four of them crowded round the shiny object. It was an idol of some sort.

Hawke exhaled, "Are you seeing what I'm seeing?" she asked, her eyes fixed on it.

"What is it?" Merrill asked.

"Who cares?" Isabela replied excitedly, "It's _shiny!"_

"Doesn't look like any kind of lyrium I've ever seen," Varric said.

Suddenly there was a noise behind them. The four of them jumped, breaking out of the strange trance which the idol seemed to have caused. They turned back towards the door. Bartrand it seemed had been following them as they cut their way through numerous creatures to get here.

"Look at this Bartrand," Varric said, "An idol made out of pure Lyrium I think! Could be worth a fortune."

Hawke reached out cautiously to touch it. The idol burned red as her hand approached. After a seconds hesitation she grabbed it. The glow disappeared. Lana turned to Varric and smiled, handing it to him.

"Not bad," he said, smiling back. "Let's see if there's anything else further in."

He tossed the idol back down the stairs towards his brother. Bartrand grabbed it and turned back, walking towards the exit. Hawke was just about to walk further in when she suddenly heard a loud scraping noise behind her. The heavy door they had just come through was closing by itself.

"THE DOOR!" she exclaimed, running down the stairs and jumping the last few. The others sprinted after her. Lana reached it first and stretched out her arm. Her hand closed around the edge and she tried to pull. Something was stopping her though. An unseen force was pulling against her and the door was closing against her will. All of a sudden it snapped shut...on her fingers.

"AHHHH!" Lana yelled in agony. She managed to pull back her hand just in time before the heavy door embedded itself completely against the frame, locking tightly. There were several popping noises and a slight crack. She held her throbbing hand in the other one and kicked the door with her foot in anger. Far from relieving her pain though it just gave her another one on her toes.

"Hawke, what happened?" Isabela asked as the others reached her. She placed a hand on Lana's back as the woman cursed continually under her breath. Lana held up her right hand then, answering the pirate's question. It was shaking uncontrollably and her ring finger and little finger were both bent at an awkward angle. The others recoiled.

"Ouch!" Varric exclaimed in disgust. He began to hammer on the door urgently. "Bartrand! Hawke's hurt! We need to get back to camp but the door shut behind you."

All of a sudden there was a low chuckle from the other side of the thick door. Then Bartrand spoke.

"You always did notice everything, Varric."

Varric frowned. He glanced at Hawke and then back at the door. Hawke became furious. It wasn't some unseen force pulling against her, it was Bartrand.

"Are you joking?" Varric asked in disbelief, "You're going to screw of your own brother for a lousy idol?"

"It's not just the idol," Bartrand replied "The location of this thaig alone is worth a fortune and I'm not splitting that three ways! Sorry brother."

"Bartrand?...BARTRAND!"

They heard footsteps as Bartrand walked away, abandoning them to their doom. The four of them stood in stunned silence, unable to believe what had just happened. Varric mimicked Hawke and kicked the heavy door. Hawke leaned against it then and slid to the ground, holding her hand. She'd had a really shitty day. Knocked unconscious and now with dislocated and possibly broken fingers.

"Let's hope there's another way out of here," Merrill said sadly, staring around with wide eyes at the unfamiliar room.

"Oh, I swear I will find that son of a bitch...sorry Mother...and I will _kill _him!" Varric shouted angrily.

"Get in line!" Hawke exclaimed through gritted teeth, holding her hand in pain.

"What are you going to do Hawke? Wave your dislocated fingers at him?" Isabela joked. Lana glared up at her and raised the two fingers which hadn't been dislocated up at the pirate. Isabela giggled.

"Good to see some of them are still working then," she replied, smirking, "I was worried we'd die down here without us having a bit of _fun _first."

Hawke snorted, regaining her sense of humour, "You said it yourself, Bela. Men are only good for one thing, woman are good for six...I think I could still handle it."

Isabela laughed. "Not what I had planned for us."

Hawke groaned once in response, the pain overcoming the humour now. Her fingers had completely popped out of their socket. "Someone please help me put my fingers back in place."

"I can do it," Isabela said, "Had to pop one of my crew's fingers back in place after her dislocated it on the rigging. Nasty stuff it was!"

"Eugh," Varric said, "I think I could do without watching that right now. I'm sickened enough as it is. Let's go scope out up ahead, Daisy."

Varric and Merrill walked on, back up the stairs. Isabela bent down beside Hawke and took her hand. It looked disgusting seeing her fingers bent like that.

"On three," Isabela said. Hawke shook her head.

"No counting...Just do it..."

Isabela grimaced. "The count to three was more for me to prepare than you," she said, revolted by the deformed hand she was holding.

Hawke groaned, "I thought you said you'd done this before!" she hissed.

"I have!" Isabela said, "It doesn't mean I like doing it!"

"Then just... _bloody hurry up_!" Hawke replied through gritted teeth. Isabela exhaled.

"Here, bite this," the pirate said, holding out a thin piece of stick. Hawke placed it in her mouth, holding it in her teeth.

"Ok...One...Two...Three!"

Hawke bit down on the stick as Isabela shoved her little finger back into place with a sickening 'pop'. She quickly did the other one before Hawke could complain. The stick in Lana's mouth split in two then as she bit down harder, groaning in pain. She spat it out, breathing rapidly as Isabela released her.

"There, fixed," she said satisfied, "Come on."

Lana allowed Isabela to help her to her feet for the second time today. The Rivaini took a bandage from her pack and wrapped it around the already swollen fingers. She handed Hawke a potion.

"Who said drinking never cured anything?" The pirate joked as Hawke knocked it back.

"Definitely neither one of us," Lana replied, grinning. She tossed the empty vial aside then.

"You know, I think Varric is now in the lead for the award for most screwed up family instead of you," Isabela joked, as they both followed the other two up the steps.

Hawke chuckled as be she could, "Thanks, feels good to know that there are families out there worse than mine. I don't think I can take much more of my mother."

"Ah you're mother's nothing compared to mine," Isabela said. "Perhaps you'll get the pleasure of meeting her one day when the Qunari come to conquer us, then you'll be thankful for Leandra."

"Aww," Hawke crooned mockingly, "You going to bring me home to meet the parents, Bela? We'll all sit down and have a nice tea together, talk like ladies do and wear pretty dresses and shoes?"

Isabela chuckled, "Oh shut up Hawke. That's that concussion talking now."

Both women laughed as they made their way through the tunnels, following the others into the unknown passageways of the ancient thaig. Maker knows what was waiting for them up ahead. Treasure was a fickle friend now. All that mattered was finding a way out. And when they did, not even The Maker himself could protect Bartrand from their retribution. That bastard was going down, one way or another.


	10. Chapter 10

The four companions made their way blindly through the uncharted Primeval Thaig together, cursing Bartrand with each step for locking them all in with nothing but the clothes on their backs and their tiny packs of supplies. That bastard! He would get his comeuppance. If not for the lyrium shining brightly from the numerous columns around them and the very walls themselves, they would have been in total darkness, their lanterns having been left behind at camp along with the tents and remains of their food. After only walking for an hour they had already been attacked by numerous Shades, which Merrill had informed them meant a demon was close by. The veil had been torn here. This expedition had taken a drastic turn for the worse. Now they had to worry about a damn demon possessing them, on top of everything else. Darkspawn were becoming the least of their concerns now. They had also been attacked by what looked like a collection of rock wraiths and had no desire to find out what else had been breeding down here in the dark. Lana was glad she had listened to her mother and left Bethany at home.

Hawke's hand had become more swollen and bruised after being squashed and dislocated by the heavy door as Bartrand pulled it shut behind him. Isabela had successfully put her fingers back in place though, enabling her to move them at least (however painful). Hawke wasn't at all surprised that the Rivaini was able to fix them. After all, the pirate had a talent for sticking fingers into holes.

"Any idea what direction we're heading?" Isabela asked then. Varric stroked his chin, thinking to himself. They had stopped momentarily to pick up some Deep Mushrooms to eat, which were growing near by.

"Not particularly," he answered, "None of this looks familiar...It's not even on the map. I doubt anyone's set foot here in centuries."

"Great," the pirate said sarcastically, almost gagging after tasting the mushroom her handed her. "Thank you so much for convincing me to come along, Hawke. I could have been sitting in The Hanged Man right now, sipping a bottle of port, having an endless parade of men hit on me and try to grab my ass. Instead I find myself trapped underground, freezing to death, sucking on a bloody disgusting mushroom!"

Hawke chuckled, "I'm sure you've sucked worse things before, Bela" she joked. Isabela and Varric laughed.

"That was by choice though," the pirate replied, smirking and throwing Lana a wink. "And to be honest even that tasted a lot better than this."

Hawke laughed again, taking another bite of her own mushroom as Isabela chucked hers on the ground. Realising what the Rivaini was talking about, she gagged suddenly and bent over, preparing to vomit. "Eughh," Lana moaned, her eyes watering, "You're probably right."

Isabela chuckled and reached out to rub her back. "And... you would know?" she asked slyly. Hawke straightened up then, realising where the Rivaini was going with this.

"Maybe I would," she teased, "Maybe I wouldn't."

Isabela groaned, "Oh come on Hawke, at least give me a straight answer this time. After dragging me down here for nothing you at least owe me that."

"Oh do I now?" Hawke asked, turning and moving closer to Isabela. She reached out and ran a hand along her arm and leaned in to whisper in the Rivaini's ear, "And...what do I get in return?"

Isabela giggled and slid her arm gently around Hawke's waist, causing their bodies to press together. "I'm sure something could be..._arranged, _Sweet Thing_."_

Hawke grinned, "Well, in that case..." she whispered, pulling back to look at Isabela again. The pirate was smiling cheekily, waiting for her response. Hawke glanced down at the pirate's lips, licking her own in anticipation. She stared seductively into Isabela's amber eyes then, her smirk getting wider.

"Yes...?" Isabela prompted, her impatience getting the better of her. Hawke exhaled deeply and ran a finger along the Rivaini's chin. She leaned in slowly and paused.

"...My answer's still no," she finished. She pulled back and turned away from Isabela, chuckling to herself. Isabela growled in frustration.

"Ugh Maker! How many times are you going to do that to me?" she asked in disappointment, feeling her arousal die once more as Hawke led her on again before chickening out at the last second. She picked up her things and followed Hawke and the others as they continued walking, shaking her head and smiling to herself. Why did Lana have such an effect on her? The woman barely had to touch her for Isabela to become turned on. She had Isabela wrapped around her little finger (now that the Rivaini had put it back in place) and was still playing games, even though she had almost given in a week ago.

Hawke laughed, tossing the Rivaini a cheeky glance over her shoulder. "Until it stops being fun," she answered. Isabela chuckled. So that was a "never". The next time would end differently though, Isabela thought, smiling to herself. There was no way Lana was going to get away with that move again. She would make sure of it.

The four of them travelled further into the thaig, hoping desperately to find something which would lead them out (and maybe a little bit of treasure along the way for their troubles). What they found instead was something completely different. Hawke froze suddenly, causing Merrill to walk into her in the semi darkness.

"Oh sorry, Hawke," the elf cried, "I'm so clumsy sometimes."

Hawke didn't respond though. She was looking up at something above them. The other three followed her gaze.

"By my ancestors-"

"Andraste's ass-"

"What _is _that?" Hawke finished, as Varric and Isabela became lost for words. They all stared up at the thing which had caused Lana to stop so suddenly.

"Holy mother of green cheeses!" Varric exhaled. "It's moving..."

What had appeared to be a large collection of rocks in front of them began to shift. It was a lot bigger than the tiny wraiths which had attacked them earlier. Hawke and her companions backed away slowly. A bright yellow light assaulted their eyes then as the rocks readjusted. The light seemed to be holding the rocks together, forcing them into some kind of bodily form. None of them had ever seen anything like this in their lives. They stared open-mouthed as something which resembled a head appeared and began to speak.

"I've had enough of you," the creature said, "You have proven your mettle, but I will not have you harm any more of these creatures without need."

"It's talking Hawke," Varric said in disbelief, tugging Lana's arm, "The bloody rock is talking!"

"It's the _demon_!" Merrill whispered, her hand tightening around her staff.

Hawke stepped forwards slightly to address it. "Define 'without need', Demon. I'd say being attacked on sight gives us plenty of need to kill."

"Oh nice job, Hawke," Isabela joked, "Make it angry why don't you? As if we're not in enough shit already."

"They will not assault you further, Human," the Demon replied, "Not without my permission..."

A shiver passed through the four of them as the Demon's threat hung in the air. After several seconds it continued.

"The profane have lingered in this place for ages beyond memory, feeding on the magic stones until it is all they know. They hunger, and I will not see their feast end!"

"They eat lyrium?" Isabela asked, "Is it any good? Maybe we should give that a try instead of those Deep Mushrooms."

"I am _not_ as they are," the Demon replied, offended, "I do not feed on the magic stones. I am...a _visitor._"

"As are we," Lana said, skipping over asking what kind of visitor this thing was. The Demon considered this, observing each of them.

"I can sense your desire to leave, but you will need my aid to do so."

"Why?" Hawke demanded. Somehow she had been expecting this.

"There is another door that leads into the paths far above us," the Demon revealed. "That is what you seek. It has been sealed however and cannot be opened without a key."

"And you just happen to know where that key is." Isabela said, her voice heavy with sarcasm.

The demon bowed its skeletal head. "I do," it replied in its deep voice.

"Hand it over then and we won't kill any more of your pets," the pirate demanded. The Demon's laughter echoed throughout the thaig.

"I don't think so," it replied, "You must first do as I ask, then I will tell you where it is."

"Hmph, what do you think?" Varric asked.

"Maybe we should," Merrill said, "We need that key to get out of here and this is the only way."

"If it's get us out of this damn place then why not?" Isabela stated.

They all turned to Hawke, waiting for her opinion. Suddenly a voice appeared in Hawke's head. Her mind momentarily flashed back to when she was little. Malcolm, her father was teaching Bethany magic in the living room one night. She was only eight and had already successfully passed all of her father's tests as he tried to teach her control her magic, concealing it when need be and using it effectively when she had to. This night though, Bethany had awoken in tears.

"Sssh my love," Malcom said, hugging his little daughter as she cried into his shoulder. She had just had a terrible nightmare and couldn't get back to sleep. "You're a strong girl. The demons pose no threat to you."

"B-b-but I saw one," Bethany cried, "I saw on in my dream. It s-s-spoke to me, Father."

Hawke had seen the look of fear on her father's face as she watched the scene from her bunk. Every mage was in danger of demon possession, even him. But he had taught his daughter as best he could. It was clear he still worried though. One slip and either of them could become an abomination. He kissed Bethany on the head and pulled back, holding both her arms and staring into her tear-stained face. She was absolutely terrified.

"Did you remember what I told you to say?" he asked. Bethany took a few gulps and nodded.

"'I will not listen to anything you have to offer demon, so be gone'," she said, using the words her father had drummed into her head everyday from she showed signs of magic at six years old.

"That's my girl," Malcolm said, giving her a proud smile. He ruffled her hair then and picked her up into his arms. "Come on, let's get you back to bed, Sweet Pea."

Bethany rested her head on her father's shoulder. "But I'm scared," she said, clinging to him tightly. Malcolm kissed her again before laying her down in the bunk below Carver's. He tucked her in and sat on the edge of her bed.

"I'll be here, Bethany," he said, touching her cheek, brushing away a fresh tear which had leaked out. "I'll not let anything harm you."

After several seconds Bethany smiled up at him.

"I love you, Father," she whispered. Malcolm smiled back.

"I love you too, Sweet Pea," he replied softly, "Now close your eyes and think of something happy. I'll be here when you wake up."

Bethany closed her eyes then and exhaled, soon drifting off into a deep, demon-free, sleep...

"Hawke?"

Isabela's voice brought Hawke back from her memory. She shook her self.

"What say you, Human?" The Demon asked, "Will you do accept my offer?"

A defiant smile appeared on Lana's face then as she stared up at the giant Hunger Demon before her. "I will not listen to anything you have to offer demon, so be gone," she said firmly, repeating Malcolm and Bethany's words.

The Demon straightened up to its full height then. "Most unwise."

Without another word the creature attacked. Hawke was ready though, she dodged the sharp end of rock as it slashed towards the air towards her. Isabela wasn't so lucky though. Lana heard her yell as the Demon's swipe caught her on the ribs. She was knocked back with the force.

"ISABELA!" Hawke shouted, getting to her feet and withdrawing her daggers.

"Ah, shit! Don't die on me Rivaini you still owe me a pint!" Varric shouted, pulling out Bianca. He began shooting bolts at once, combining with Merrill's spells which were flying through the air. The Demon was still advancing though, only slowed slightly by their attacks. Without a second's pause Hawke sprinted towards it and leapt, holding her daggers over her head. She slipped inside the Demon's armor of rock and connected with the yellow light inside, holding the pieces together. The rocks fell to the ground and the yellow light extinguished as the blade connected.

Suddenly they were surrounded by abominations and other rock wraiths. Varric helped up Merrill who had stumbled over the rocks and they both began to fight the enemies around them. Isabela was slowly getting to her feet. Lana, realising there were too many to fight, ran towards her and threw the pirate's arm over her shoulder. Isabela gasped, holding her side where her white top had ripped and was pouring with blood. She used Hawke for support as they both made their way towards the door ahead of them.

"Let's get out of here!" Hawke called to the others, "There's too many!"

"Ah, please. Bianca can handle this herself!" Varric shouted back.

"Now Varric!" Hawke ordered, "There's more coming out of the walls!"

Varric and Merrill fended off those closest as Lana led Isabela to the exit. Lana shoved open the door with her foot and turned around.

"Oh look, they brought their friends!" The dwarf joked. "Let's dance you sons of bitches!"

There were no fewer than fifty Rock Wraith's and Shades advancing on their position now. Hawke hated running from a fight but there was nothing the three of them could do against such increasing numbers. Merrill and Varric were backing away, still shooting spells and bolts until they passed the door frame. Without a second's paused, Varric pushed the heavy door shut and twisted the lock. The noise of the creatures on the other side was dulled but they could still hear them hammering, trying to get through.

"I'm getting too old for this shit!" Varric exhaled, turning to face them all. Merrill had a few cuts on her arms where she had fallen and Isabela was still hanging off Lana's shoulder. Hawke lowered her to the ground, leaning her against the wall of the long corridor they now found themselves in.

"Are you alright?" she asked, kneeling down beside her. Isabela glared at her.

"You could have bloody warned me before putting us all in the shit!" The pirate replied angrily, clutching her ribs. Lana smirked.

"You know me," she said, "I love being spontaneous."

Isabela chuckled against her will. Damn Hawke for not letting her stay angry. The cut on her side was stinging like a bitch and it was her fault. "Oh, piss off!" Isabela replied, trying to vent off her anger. Hawke simply chuckled.

"Look, for what it's worth, I'm sorry," she said, "Let me see the damage."

Isabela sighed harshly and removed her hand from around her ribs, allowing Lana to check the wound. She flinched as the woman touched the skin around it, feeling for a break.

"You're pretty good with your hands you know?" The pirate joked, trying to take her mind off the pain. Hawke chuckled. It didn't matter what situation they seemed to be in. Isabela was becoming famous for flirting at inappropriate times.

"So I've been told," Lana replied, smirking slyly. She worked her hand gently around the pirate's side, slipping her hand through the whole which the Demon's attack had made in her shirt and feeling for any cracks or pain that Isabela might have been feeling. Suddenly the Rivaini gasped.

"Ouch!" she exclaimed, "On second thought, I take it back. Trust you to find bloody pain I didn't even know I had yet."

Varric chuckled along with Hawke, "She always has been a thorn in your side, Rivaini," he joked.

"Hey!" Lana said, pretending to be offended. "I'll have you know I can very good with my hands when I need to be."

Isabela chuckled, "Ahh you're all talk, Sweet Thing. I'm yet to see any proof."

Lana rolled her eyes. "And I thought you had a talent for seduction," she replied, grinning, "_I'm_ yet to see any proof of that."

Isabela groaned, "Touché."

The three of them laughed, with Merrill looking on. Varric had given her some ointment for her cuts to stop them from stinging. When she was finished dabbing it on, she handed it to Isabela.

"Thanks, Kitten," Isabela replied, taking the tiny vial from her. She handed it to Hawke then. "You do it," she said, "I can't get a good enough look."

"I'm not surprised with those things you carry around all day," Lana joked, gesturing to Isabela's breasts. The pirate laughed again and then gasped painfully, clutching her side once more.

"AH balls, stop making me laugh!" she replied jokingly, "Just put the damn ointment on so we can get moving. I need a bloody drink. The sooner we leave here the better."

Hawke chuckled and began to dab the ointment over the open cut. It must have had some magic in it as the wound healed quickly, drying up the wet blood and forming a scab. Hawke handed Varric the bottle back and pulled Isabela to her feet.

"Can you walk?" she asked. Isabela rolled her eyes and pulled Hawke's hands away from her.

"We're not all as fragile as you, Hawke," she mocked, leading the way, "'Oh, Bela look I hit my head and I'm going to collapse'."

The others laughed as the pirate imitated Hawke's voice in a horrible, high-pitched way. Lana shook her head.

"Oh shut up," she said, "We'll see how long you last without a drink to numb the pain."

She heard Isabela laugh at her response and the three of them followed after the pirate as she led them (hopefully) towards an exit.

* * *

After a few more hours of travelling they came to some crumbling caverns. The very walls seemed to be eroding away around them, leaving only a few slim columns behind. It was darker here, the lyrium veins running in thin red lines along the floor now.

"What is this place?" Lana asked, as they walked further in to explore.

"It think this is the vault," Varric answered, "The dwarves would have brought their-"

Suddenly the rock began to move under their feet. Lana and the dwarf stepped back, ushering the others with them.

"Ow, you stood on my foot, Varric!" Merrill moaned.

"Sorry, Daisy," Varric whispered back. None of them could take their eyes off what was happening in front of them. A Rock Wraith was putting itself together, this time with a red core but with the same skeletal head as the Demon they had just killed.

"Oh balls, not another one!" Isabela complained, staring up at it.

"I don't think this one wants to talk," Hawke said. She was right.

The Rock Wraith immediately began to attack, slashing forwards with a giant swipe, scattering the four of them as they all dived for cover. Hawke scrambled along the ground to get behind one of the columns. She peaked her head out slightly only to see what looked like a bolt of lightning soaring towards her. The lightening collided with the column and bits of rock scattered the ground. She searched for the others. They had all taken up various positions of 'safety' and were staring at Hawke expectantly.

"Do you're thing, Hawke!" Varric called, "We'll draw its attention, you be the hero."

Hawke nodded to show she had understood. She watched as Varric and Merrill left their hiding places and began to attack, giving Lana some covering fire.

"Hello, I'm Merrill and I'll be your distraction!" the Dalish mage yelled. Varric chuckled softly beside her. Daisy never was good at fighting talk. Lana beckoned Isabela towards her hiding spot. The pirate ran as best she could from her own and crouched down beside her.

"I have an idea," Hawke said, "Are you up to it?"

"Say the word," she replied, throwing her a smirk.

"Alright, here's what we're going to do."

Varric and Merrill weaved in and out of the stone columns, drawing the Rock Wraith's attention away from the others. They had no idea what Hawke was planning but it needed to happen soon. Suddenly, out of no where, a bolt of lightning blasted through one of the columns and caught Varric on the shoulder, knocking him to the ground. The dwarf groaned and looked up from where he lay. Bianca was a little ways behind him.

"Someone help Varric!" Merrill squeaked as the Rock Wraith gained on her.

To both the dwarf's and the elf's surprise, Isabela came flying through the air, her dagger held in both hands and she plunged it through the red light, under the Wraith's collection of rocks, just like Hawke had done before. She rolled across the ground as her momentum took her, the Rock Wraith falling to pieces behind her. The red light didn't disappear this time though. Instead it created a ball of energy in the middle of the cavern and began to pulse. Hawke ran towards it, a dagger in each hand and began to take chunks out of it, feeling it scorch her slightly as it came apart. Isabela dragged herself to her feet and ran back towards it, doing the same. Soon the entire place was ablaze with chunks of red light, flying in all directions as the Wraith was whittled down to nothing. After several minutes it eventually blew to pieces, knocking both Lana and Isabela off their feet and slamming them hard into the wall.

Silence fell as all four of them tried to catch their breath after the fight. Hawke got to her feet and dusted herself down, before running to Isabela and helping her up.

"Great bloody plan!" The pirate said, holding her side again. Hawke grinned.

"I always aim to please," she answered cheekily. Isabela chuckled.

"Well, next time I choose where your aim goes," she said, smirking. They both laughed before going to check on the others. Merrill was helping Varric up. The dwarf thanked her and picked up his beloved crossbow.

"I think Bianca's gotten scratched," he said worriedly.

"Don't worry, Varric, she'll be fine," Merrill said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"More than fine..." Hawke said in a strange voice.

Everyone looked up at her. Her voice sounded weirdly excited and she began to walk away slowly. The three of them followed, suddenly becoming entranced by the same thing which had captured her gaze. There, hoarded in the corner, glowing in the light of the lyrium veins, was a massive collection of treasure chests, surrounded by pure gold.

"Check the chests for a key," Hawke said, bending over and opening the closest one. Here eyes lit up once more as she saw the amount of treasure inside.

"Found some," Varric said, "I'll try the door and see if any fit. You collect the best pieces you can find and then we can finally get out of here."

Isabela, Merrill and Hawke rifled through the treasure, unable to believe their luck. Hawke couldn't help but feel a little smug that Bartrand hadn't found this place. Let him have his damn idol. They were going to be richer than any of the expedition now.

"Oh, Maker!" Isabela crooned, running her fingers through the coins, "I just want to lie down on this pile of gold and have sex on it."

Hawke and Varric burst out laughing, while Merrill blushed. Only Isabela would see a collection of treasure and declare it a place for sex. _Pirates_, Lana thought to herself, shaking her head. She had to admit though. This gold was probably turning her on just as much as Isabela. For once she felt light-hearted, as though her life was finally heading in the right direction. Once they got to the surface and received the coin for their troubles, Lana could live like she had always wanted: Free from the servitude of others. That feeling was definitely better than any treasure-educed orgasm which Isabela was having right now.

After a half an hour of choosing their rewards, Varric finally found the right key. There was a sweet sound of metal turning in a lock and the heavy door swung open, revealing a path going up, which as the Demon told them would lead them back to The Deep Roads above.

"Let's get going," Hawke said, handing Varric his pack, which was now full of gold. "I've had enough of this place."

"This should lead us out," the dwarf said, throwing the pack over his shoulder. "Grab a bit of that lyrium to light the way."

"How long to get to the surface?" Hawke asked, hacking open some lyrium veins and placing the liquid in empty vials.

"If we're unlucky, maybe a week," he answered.

"And if we're lucky?" Hawke asked. Varric gave her a cheeky smile.

"We stumble over Bartrand's corpse on the way."

All four of them laughed as they exited the ancient thaig with their winnings.

"I claim first kick!" Isabela exclaimed, making them laugh even more.

Their moods had changed drastically after striking lucky with the treasure. Now all they had to do was survive and make it to the surface. No small feat, but at least they had something worth fighting for. There was no way any Darkspawn was going to stop them from becoming rich. They had already stolen Hawke's little brother, she wasn't going to let them steal her gold as well.

* * *

They travelled for days, surviving on Deep Mushrooms once again. Lana's stomach hurt, and she was sure the others felt the same. A few of the mushroom batches had tasted worse than the others (if that was actually possible). Eventually they made it to The Deep Roads and were able to follow the map again. It wouldn't be long before they reached the surface now. It was pitch-dark though, causing them to move slowly. The only piece of lyrium which still survived was Hawke's. She led the way, each of them touching the other to stay together as she led them out safely. If they thought The Deep Roads were scary in the light, it was nothing compared to blindly navigating them in the dark.

"I don't like this," Merrill whimpered, clinging tightly to Isabela. The pirate stroked her hand.

"Hush, Kitten. We'll be home soon."

"Do you want some water Merrill? I have little bit left," Hawke asked. It was the only thing she could think of to soothe her.

"Yes please," the elf squeaked.

"My flask is in my pocket," she said, "I can't reach though while I'm holding the lyrium."

Isabela sighed, "I'll get it."

They continued walking slowly as Isabela blindly rifled through Hawke's numerous compartments in her jacket and pants. Suddenly Lana froze, taking a sharp intake of breath.

"Um...Isabela?" she asked uncertainly.

"Yessss?" the pirate sang back.

"...That's not my pocket."

The Rivaini chuckled smugly. "...I know."

"Ahh Maker, Rivaini!" Varric groaned in the dark, chuckling to himself. The dwarf shook his head. He could only imagine where Isabela had reached. Hawke's breath caught as Isabela's hand slipped further. Lana reached down and removed the pirate's hand from under pants before she could do anything further. She heard Isabela chuckle and begin search the other pockets again, finding the flask almost instantly and handing it to Merrill.

"You knew where that was all along didn't you?" Lana asked, finally beginning to walk again. Isabela laughed again.

"Maybe," she teased, "You're flask was leaking on your jacket...I just wanted to check if you were _wet_ anywhere else...especially considering we've been in close proximity for the past hour or so."

Everyone laughed. Lana shook her head in disbelief.

"You're touch doesn't have that much of an effect on me, Bela," she said.

"Oh don't _lie_, Hawke," The pirate replied, "We both know I almost drove you crazy just then."

"Dream on," Lana replied. There was no way so was going to admit it. "I already told you your hands are too damn cold to get me even remotely hot under the collar."

Isabela laughed along with her, remembering their last frolic in The Deep Roads. Varric and Merrill were confused.

"Do I even want to know about that conversation?" the dwarf asked them jokingly.

"I'll tell you in The Hanged Man when we get home, Varric," Isabela said. Lana reached back and gave her a light slap around the head.

"Ouch, I deserved that," Isabela admitted, laughing to herself. Lana chuckled with her as she led them all forwards, finally seeing some light at the end of the tunnel.

* * *

"Home, sweet home...Finally," Varric said as they walked back into Lowtown, "Oh I wonder if Bartrand came back into the city. You think I'd be that lucky?"

"Luck hasn't exactly been on our side so far, "Lana answered. The dwarf laughed.

"Well it's on the verge of change," he said, holding up his bag of treasure. All four of them laughed. "Let's get them to The Hanged Man and I'll arrange for a buyer who'll give us the best deal. Then we can relax. We're going to be rich sons of bitches!"

The four of them cheered and made their way through the streets of Lowtown, enjoying being out in the open air again (apart from the fact that it still smelt like shit). As they approached The Hanged Man, Merrill handed them her gold and made her way home, tired from the travel. Varric hid their treasure in a chest in his room and paid his people to guard the door. He then made arrangements for a buyer and the three of them left.

"I'm sure you want to tell Bethany the good news?" Isabela asked, as they hovered outside the tavern. Lana nodded and smiled.

"I can't wait to see her," she said happily. "I assume you're going to The Blooming Rose?"

Isabela chuckled, "How did you g-"

Loud shouting and crying suddenly erupted in the distance, interrupting their conversation. Varric, Isabela and Hawke turned towards the direction of the Alienage. What was going on? Suddenly Lana's blood ran cold. She could hear her mother's voice above all the other baritones. Immediately she began to sprint in the direction of Gamlen's house, panic-stricken. The others ran behind her, wondering what this commotion could be about. The shouts and cries were echoing loudly throughout Lowtown. Lana pulled out her dagger as she made it to the bottom of Gamlen's steps. What she saw at the top made her heart stop. No fewer than five Templars were blocking the way into the house.

"What's going on?" she demanded, running to the top and pushing her way through. To her horror, two other Templars exited the house... Bethany at their mercy. Leandra was screaming and crying, trying to pull her back inside.

"No please don't take her! Not my daughter! _Please!_"

"Let her go!" Lana shouted, raising her dagger.

"SISTER!" Bethany screamed, shocked to see her back.

As Lana went to strike, the Templars behind her grabbed her tightly.

"Get off me!" she yelled, struggling against them. Her dagger fell to the ground. "You can't have her!"

"Calm down, Miss!"

Lana looked up. She knew that voice. It was Knight-Captain Cullen. The man had his hand clasped around Bethany.

"YOU?" Hawke screamed, "Why are you doing this? After everything I've done for you?"

"You're sister was caught conspiring with other apostates to free mages of the Circle," Cullen informed her. "We have to arrest her! I'm sorry, Hawke." Lana was dumbstruck.

"What!?" she exclaimed, turning to Bethany. Her sister looked ashamed then.

"I'm sorry, Lana," she said, tears falling down her face, "I...I had to help..."

So Anders had gone behind her back and poached her sister while she was not here to defend her. An uncontrollable fury overcame Lana then. She began struggling with all her might to break free of the Templar's grip.

"I'm going to _kill_ that bastard!" she yelled angrily.

The Templars mistaking her words as being directed at Cullen, struck Hawke across the face hard. She doubled over on the ground as one of their knees collided with her stomach then. Bethany screamed as her sister spluttered on her hands and knees, holding her ribs. An armored elbow then slammed down hard onto her spine.

"No! Stop it!" Bethany cried hysterically, watching Lana get battered before her eyes. "Please don't hurt her!"

Another boot collided with Hawke's midsection again. She coughed and collapsed forwards, completely winded, landing flat on her stomach. Isabela and Varric tried to get through the Templars to help her but there was too many of them. They pushed the dwarf and the pirate back and began to file down the steps, dragging Bethany with them.

"BETHANY!" Leandra cried, collapsing to her knees and crying uncontrollably, "NO!...Please, not my daughter!"

Gamlen looked on, completely unsure of what to do. He bent over and placed a comforting hand on Leandra's back, his eyes eyeing Lana with concern.

"LANA!" Bethany screamed as she was dragged away, "LANA...!"

She struggled unsuccessfully against the strong Templar hands as they hauled her down the street. Hawke instantly revived at her cries. She got to her feet, lifting her dagger from the ground, and charged down the steps after her little sister. She had to save her! Varric and Isabela ran after her and tried to reach Lana before she could do anything but she was too fast for them. They watched in horror as Lana's dagger connected with Templar recruit. He fell to the ground with a cry, blood sprouting from under his armor.

"Hawke, stop!" Isabela shouted, trying to catch up. She had never seen her in a rage like this before. It was unsettling to see the normally easy-going woman loose control. They needed to stop her before she did something stupid.

"Hawke!" Varric called, running a little behind Isabela.

Bethany was still screaming and crying in the distance, watching as her older sister try desperately to fight her way through more Templars to save her.

"I'm coming Bethany!" Lana shouted, pushing her way through the surrounding onlookers to get to the Templars again. The Templars tried to grab her and stop her from advancing. The closest turned and blocked her oncoming attack, knocking her dagger to the ground from her weakened hand. With nothing else, Lana swung her fists forward and connected with his face, breaking his nose. He staggered back slightly, dazed and off-balance. Hawke continued to punch him with everything she had. Suddenly she released an uppercut, connecting with his chin, and the Templar flew backwards, landing roughly on the ground and falling unconscious.

Lana made to move forwards again, to stop the others who were dragging her sister away to imprison her in the Gallows. The Templars withdrew their swords threateningly. One of them stopped and held his along Bethany's throat. She stopped struggling at once, feeling the cool blade hover dangerously at her vitals.

"One more step and your apostate sister dies!" he threatened.

Isabela finally caught up with Lana, who had withdrawn her other dagger. As the woman made to attack, the Rivaini reached out and locked her arms around her, holding her back. Hawke's remaining dagger dropped to the ground under Isabela's grip.

"Get off me!" she growled, struggling against her. "I'll kill them all!"

"Hawke calm down. You _can't_ win this!" Isabela said desperately, "Let her go!"

"NO!" she shouted, "LET GO OF ME, BELA! I SWEAR!"

The Templar relaxed then, seeing Hawke was finally subdued. He continued on after Cullen, dragging Bethany with him, ordering the other Templars to follow. Lana fought continuously against Isabela's grip on her as she stared after her little sister's terrified face. Bethany sobbed as she saw Lana desperately try to follow where she could not. She was extremely grateful that Isabela had stopped her then. The last thing she wanted was for her sister to get killed trying to save her. Lana had always protected her younger sibling from harm. This time it was hopeless though.

"BETHANYYY!" Lana called in dismay. "BETHANY!"

Isabela could see every muscle in Hawke's neck contract as she called after her sister, her desperate cries echoing throughout Lowtown and giving the pirate the chills. Lana just couldn't let Bethany go. Isabela wrapped her arms around her tighter, pulling her close into her as the woman's strength waned out. Her legs buckled and she finally stopped thrashing, going limp against the pirate's arms in defeat.

"Sshh," Isabela soothed, lowering her to the ground. She was almost out of breath from keeping Hawke restrained. The woman had unbelievable strength. Varric placed a comforting hand on Hawke's shoulder as she heaved roughly, trying to control her rage. Her every muscle was on edge. There was no way Isabela was letting her go just yet. Not until Bethany was completely out of their reach. The last thing she would want was for her older sister to end up in the Gallows along with her.

"Bethany..." Lana said weakly. She couldn't believe that just a few minutes ago she was the happiest she had ever felt. She and Bethany were supposed to move into the estate together, go shopping in Hightown and finally buy some real clothes. How drastically everything had changed. The world was cruel, cruel place.

"Come on," Isabela said, lifting Lana to her feet, "Let's get you a drink."

The pirate kept her arm around her and led her to The Hanged Man, Varric tagging along beside them. Onlookers stared after Hawke in fear after seeing her frenzy. They had never seen anyone willing to fight Templars unarmed to save an apostate before. Lana's broken hand was even more painful now after repeatedly punching the Templar. She didn't care though. She would gladly do it again. She was vaguely aware of Isabela's arm around her waist and found it oddly comforting. Isabela normally didn't do this kind of thing. Lana realised she must have really worried the woman with her outburst, for her to still be consoling her.

Varric pushed open the door to The Hanged Man and led Hawke and Isabela upstairs to his private quarters, closing the door behind them. The pirate sat Hawke down on the nearest chair and pulled a bottle of whiskey from the Dwarf's pre-ordered collection, pouring Lana a large amount.

"Here," she said gently, placing it into Hawke's hand. Lana took it without question and knocked it back at once. The empty mug then slipped from her grasp and fell to the floor. She got to her feet.

"I need to find Anders," she said at once. Before either Isabela or Varric could react Lana was already at the bottom of the stairs and out the door of The Hanged Man. They immediately ran after her, hoping to catch her before she got to him. There wasn't a doubt in either of their minds that Lana would massacre the mage for what he had done. Lana ran towards Darktown with nothing but murder on her mind. She couldn't wait to wring that bastard's neck for putting her sister in danger and bringing the Templars wrath. They had successfully kept Bethany out of danger before now, until Anders had interfered with his own selfish ambitions. He would pay. Hawke would make sure of it.

Reaching the mage's clinic in Darktown, Lana kicked open the door roughly and barged in. Anders, treating patients, looked up in surprise. He threw her a smile.

"You're back!" he said cheerfully, "How was the expedition?"

Without saying a word Lana swung for him. Her fist connected with his face and he fell to the floor. The numerous patients in the clinic screamed and backed away. Hawke grabbed the mage by the scruff and dragged him off the floor before slamming him roughly against the wall.

"Why did you do it?" she demanded, "I told you I would kill you if you put my sister in danger."

"She came to me," Anders croaked, staring at the crazy look in Hawke's eyes with fear, "She wanted to help...so I let her...It wasn't a dangerous task."

The people around them screamed once again, as Hawke kneed the mage in the groin. He gasped in pain and collapsed in a heap.

"The Templars got her!" she yelled. Anders looked up in shock. He clearly didn't know.

"Oh no! I'm so sorry!"

Hawke's foot collided with his face this time. Anders nose poured with blood.

"Save your stinking apologies!" she spat furiously.

"Someone call the guards!"

"She's going to kill him!"

Hawke ignored the shouts around her and reached down then. She grabbed Anders by the throat, squeezing as hard as she could. Anders eyes widened and mana began to swirl in his hands. Lana could see Justice coming to the surface to protect him.

"HAWKE ,LET HIM GO NOW!"

Aveline had just appeared at the clinic. Seeing that Hawke wasn't listening she rushed over and dragged her off an almost completely blue Anders. He coughed, trying to find his breath. Lana struggled against the strong hands around her.

"Get off me, Aveline. I'm going to kill him for what he's done!"

"Not on my watch, Hawke!" The Guardswoman replied forcefully, "Calm down, I don't want to have to arrest you."

Hawke tried to pry Aveline's hands from her, "I mean it Aveline!"

"So do I!" she replied firmly.

Suddenly Hawke got free. She charged towards Anders once again and smacked him as hard as she could. He fell to the ground again. Hawke immediately felt a large welt to the back of the head then and collapsed to the ground beside him. Dazed, she turned over onto her back to see Aveline staring down at her. The room was beginning to spin.

"Sorry Hawke," Aveline said sadly. Her voice sounded like she was speaking through a tunnel. "It's for your own good."

After several more seconds, Lana felt her head go light and drop to the side. He eyes grew heavy against her will and finally closed as she fell unconscious, disappearing into the blackness.


	11. Chapter 11

An ear-piercing scream echoed in the distance, waking Hawke from unconsciousness. Water was dripping somewhere close-by and the air she breathed was damp and restricting. There was a cold stone floor beneath her head, accentuating the pain of a large welt which was forming in the shape of Aveline's fist. Something was nibbling at her toes as she lay on her side. A rat most likely. Her whole body ached thanks to the Templar brutality and she wanted nothing more than to stay in this one spot forever, feeling as though if she moved, she would actually crack into tiny pieces. Blood was slowly dripping from her mouth onto the ground. She couldn't even find the energy to open her eyes.

Suddenly freezing cold water was splashed over her. Lana jumped to her feet immediately, shocked into obedience and backed away against the furthest wall, out of the waters reach. Her heart was beating frantically in her chest and her long brown hair was plastered to her face. She was completely drenched from head to toe. Hawke pushed her wet hair back and looked up, through the bars of her cell.

"Good, you're up," Aveline greeted her. Standing beside her was another guard with an empty bucket.

"Did I have a choice!?" Lana replied angrily, still shaking from the rude awakening. She glared at the Guardswoman, still unwilling to move any closer.

"Leave us," Aveline ordered the Guardsman. He obeyed at once, walking the length of the corridor and closing the heavy door behind him. Aveline withdrew a set of keys and opened the cell door, walking inside and shutting it behind her. She took a seat on a nearby wooden stool and gestured for Hawke to sit on the other. Lana threw her a dirty look before reluctantly obeying, dragging it towards her and placing herself down roughly.

"Here to council me, _Captain_?" she asked spitefully, "Or are you going to apologise for knocking me unconscious?"

Aveline gave her a look of disappointment. Maker, she was getting them from all directions these days. How warm and fuzzy it made her feel inside!

"Hawke..." Aveline began, leaning forwards, "What has gotten into you?"

Lana said nothing but continued glaring at her.

"You've changed," Aveline continued, "I never thought I'd see the day when I'd have to arrest you. I thought I could always trust you to at least try and do right...But it seems I was wrong..."

Hawke shook her head and got to her feet, turning away from the Guardswoman and leaning against the bars of her cell. She was fuming.

"Anders deserved it," she said bitterly, "You shouldn't have stopped me."

Aveline got to her feet as well then and followed her. "I'm not talking about Anders...Hawke you killed a _Templar_!" Lana looked up in surprise. She hadn't realised that in her fit of rage she had actually killed the man. He was so young as well. "You're lucky you're not in the Gallows right now!"

Lana snorted, "You mean this isn't the place where they torture and kill mages for an accident of birth?" she asked sarcastically.

Aveline rolled her eyes and shook her head, "No...This is just the brig. Your pirate whore could have told you that in a second, the amount of time she's spent here."

Hawke sighed, "When are you two going to start being civil to each other?"

Aveline moved closer then and placed a strong hand on Hawke's shoulder. Lana ignored her. "She's not good for you, Hawke," Aveline said firmly, "She's a bad influence and she's dragging you down along with her... I don't like it."

Hawke tried to shake out of Aveline's grip then, but the Guardswoman resisted, instead grabbing her with both arms and spinning her round to face her. She was trying greatly to make her heed her words. Lana stared at her angrily, and tried to relinquish her grip.

"Let go of me, Aveline!"

"Hawke, please," Aveline implored, staring desperately into her eyes, "Listen to me! Isabela is bad news. She has been from day one but you're just too blinded by her good looks and charm to see it. She'll hurt you in the end."

"You don't even know her!" Hawke spat.

"Neither do you," Aveline countered, "You can't trust her."

Lana sighed. She knew that part of what Aveline was saying was true. "I don't trust her," she admitted, "But I like her Aveline...as a friend... Nothing more."

Aveline gave her a sceptical look, "Hawke we both know she wants to be more than just your friend. She's _using_ you."

This time Lana managed to shake out of Aveline's grip. She walked back to the little table in the corner of her cell and leaned on it with both hands, staring down at the numerous stains and marks on its surface. She heard Aveline approach her again. The woman placed a comforting hand on Lana's back this time, seeing her trying to hold herself together. She'd had a lot to deal with in the past twenty-four hours.

"Look...I'm sorry about Bethany," Aveline said gently, trying to leave her businesslike tone aside for a second. Lana didn't move. "I don't blame you for what you did to Anders, even though I can't condone it. Bethany was a sweet girl, and he took advantage of that...But this is my job, Hawke. I must do right by the Guard...Otherwise I'm no better than Captain Jevon was."

Lana exhaled deeply, "I know Aveline...I understand," she replied, her voice finally lowering, "It's just...She's only been gone for a day and... I miss her _so _much already." Hawke's voice broke on the last word. She could feel herself choking up and lowered her head, not wanting Aveline to see. The Guardswoman rubbed her back and moved closer, placing a hand over Lana's bruised one on the table.

"Hey," she soothed, "She'll be alright, Hawke. She's a strong girl...Try not to worry. Cullen is a good man, he'll make sure nothing bad happens to her."

Lana snorted, "He was the one who took her in the first place."

"He was only doing his job...just like I am."

Lana didn't reply. She knew Aveline was right. Cullen had done his best to avoid arresting Bethany in the past. He knew she was a mage but had purposefully kept her out of Circle hands after she saved his life on Sundermount when Wilmod attacked him. However, Bethany's resistance activities with Anders' contacts had given him no choice but to apprehend her. She was actively taking up a hostile position against the Templars and he was forced to bring her in, just like Aveline was forced to arrest Hawke. Lana cursed Anders for the hundredth time for dragging her sister into this mess.

"I'll get you some ice for your head," Aveline said, realising Hawke wanted to be left alone. She could see the swelling her armor had left on Lana's skull and regretted knocking her out back at the clinic in Darktown. It had to be done though. Lana was completely out of control and she would have been in even more trouble after killing Anders as well as a Templar Recruit in the same day. At least now she was in safe hands. Aveline would keep her here until the whole situation died down.

Lana heard the Guard Captain leave her cell. She manoeuvred herself onto the nearby stool and laid her head on the table. She tried to fight her tears, but to no avail. They leaked out and streamed down her face as she thought of Bethany. As much as she missed her she couldn't help but feel a little angry with her sister. Lana had specifically told her not to get involved with Anders manifesto and she had disobeyed her. It was the first time that Bethany hadn't taken heed of her advice, even though she knew that what ever Lana said or did was always to protect her. Why disobey her now though? Maybe Aveline was right, Lana thought to herself, maybe she had changed without even realising it. And maybe Bethany had noticed too and decided she could no longer believe in her sister's judgement.

The cell door opened and Aveline re-entered. She stared at Hawke, who was resting her head on the table, staring at the wall. She couldn't see her face.

"Are you alright?" The Guardswoman asked gently. Hawke didn't answer. Deciding it would just be best to leave her be, Aveline placed the ice wrapped in a cloth on the table beside her and made her way back to the cell door.

"Aveline...?"

Aveline looked back, surprised at how weak Lana's voice sounded. Hawke was still facing the wall and hadn't moved an inch.

"Yes?" Aveline asked. She saw Lana heave a sigh.

"...Thanks..."

The Guardswoman gave her friend a sympathetic smile. "Any time," she replied. Without another word, she opened the cell door and exited, locking it behind her.

When Lana heard the door shut, she blindly reached out for the ice pack and balanced it on the back of her skull. She was already freezing cold thanks to the bucket of water being thrown over her but could feel the pain on her head numb under the ice-pack and closed her eyes. With nothing but painful thoughts for company, she allowed herself to fall asleep, wanting nothing more than to escape this whole mess even just for a few minutes.

* * *

"Ugh, they should really change the decor in this place."

Hawke had just opened her eyes when Isabela came into view. She must have slept for a full twenty-four hours. The pirate was smirking at her, sitting on the other stool nearby and leaning her arms on the table. Lana straightened up and rubbed the sleep from her vision.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"You didn't think I'd let you spend time in the brig alone did you?" Isabela joked.

"Seriously, Bela," Lana replied, getting to her feet. She wasn't in any mood for jokes. She walked to the cell bars and leaned on them, scanning their surroundings. Isabela got to her feet as well and walked over beside her, doing the same.

"One of my girls in The Blooming Rose got arrested," the pirate admitted, "She grassed me up to the Big Girl...and of course _she_ just loves to have an excuse to lock me up."

Hawke snorted, "One of your girls?" she asked, raising her eyebrows at the Rivaini. "Don't tell me you're in the brothel business now."

Isabela chuckled, "Course not," she replied, "It's just a bit of freelance work while I wait for news of this stupid relic."

"Still no word?" Hawke asked lightly. Isabel sighed and shook her head.

"Not a damn thing," she groaned, "Castillon knew it would be no small feat. I think he expects me to fail."

"Don't give up hope," Lana said, "I'm sure it'll turn up."

Isabela chuckled, "I wish I had your optimism."

Hawke gave her a weird look. "What optimism?" she asked, turning back towards the table again. Isabela watched her go, sadly. She really felt for her after what happened two days ago. The memory of the woman's complete frenzy was still etched in the pirates mind. She had never witnessed someone fight so hard to protect something they loved. It broke her heart a little to see it (Yes, she had a heart...Who'd have thought?).

Isabela walked over to where she stood. Lana had her back to her and was leaning over the table, her head low. She looked completely defeated. The Rivaini reached out and ran her hands gently up her back, resting them on her shoulders. She began massaging them gently, feeling how tense Lana was.

"I'm so sorry about Bethany," Isabela said softly. Hawke didn't answer but stayed still, allowing the Rivaini to work out the kinks in her posture. It felt oddly relaxing. She sorely needed it. Every inch of her was in pain right now. Lana closed her eyes, wanting nothing more than just to feel the pirate's skilful hands on her right now. Her head lifted and she moaned involuntarily.

"You're pretty good at that," she said, feeling Isabela's fingers press along her shoulders. Isabela chuckled.

"I know," she agreed, not afraid to admit it. Lana smiled. Isabela certainly knew how to take a compliment. The pirate's hands then moved to her back. She slid her hands under Lana's arms and pressed her thumbs alongside her spine, making small circular motions.

"How are your ribs?" Hawke asked, referring to Isabela's injury in The Deep Roads. Her eyes remained closed as she enjoyed Isabela's hands moving slowly down her back, relieving the tension in her body.

"Nothing a whiskey or two couldn't fix," the pirate joked. She felt Lana chuckle under her touch. "Glad to see you can still laugh, Hawke," she said, serious now. After everything that had happened she was worried that Lana would have lost her sense of humour. Any normal person would have. But then, Lana wasn't normal...she was so much more than that.

"I can't seem to be able to help myself when I'm with you," Lana admitted.

Isabela's hands paused at her waist then. Lana could feel her fingers caress her gently, reluctant to let go even thought the massage was finished. Isabela's warm breath tickled her neck. Hawke turned slowly to face her, realising then just how close the Rivaini was. Isabela's hands still rested on her body. She caressed her sides gently, as Lana ran her hands up her arms. The Rivaini could feel her heart pounding in her chest as she lost herself in Lana's dark brown eyes. She had never felt this way before. Hawke's stare was captivating.

Lana reached up and placed a hand on her cheek then, the two of them slowly getting closer without even realising. The only sound was their gentle breathing, getting slightly heavier as the distance between them disappeared. Lana closed her eyes, the Rivaini doing the same. After a split seconds hesitation, their lips finally met. Lana felt her breath leave her as she kissed the Rivaini passionately, tasting the sweetness of Isabela's tongue as it pressed against hers. Her lips were soft, tender, but with a hint of danger behind them. It was more intoxicating than either of them could have imagined. Neither woman could believe that after all this time, after all their jokes and games, the inevitable had finally happened.

Hawke felt Isabela wrap her arms further around her waist and rest on her lower back, caressing against her soft skin. Their bodies met then, their heaving bosoms pressing together. Lana slid her hand from Isabela's cheek, trickling gently along her neck and down over her breast, before resting it on the pirate's waist. She heard Isabela moan with pleasure at her touch, and felt the Rivaini press her weight forwards, backing Lana towards the table. Hawke leaned back on her hands, realising what Isabela was initiating. Suddenly the Rivaini brought her own hands back from around Lana's waist and began to slide them south. Lana gasped and broke momentarily from their kiss as she felt Isabela rub her through her pants with her fingers. The pirate giggled seductively and began kissing her once more, not wanting to stop. Lana could feel herself become wet with anticipation, her breathing uncontrollable as she felt herself become aroused. Isabela then felt for the hem of her shirt, running her hands up Hawke's abdomen and grabbing her breasts roughly. Lana's back arched and she broke from their kiss once more, moaning with pleasure. Isabela began kissing her neck, running her tongue along the woman's collarbone, feeling herself become aroused. She had wanted her for so long. Her lips found Lana's for the third time then and she nibble the bottom one with her teeth. She could feel Lana, crazy with anticipation, shudder below her. Hawke kissed her eagerly, bring her hand to the back of the pirate's neck and pulling her closer. Both women lost themselves in the other.

Suddenly Hawke panicked. She pulled her lips from Isabela's and placed a hand on the Rivaini's shoulder holding her off.

"What's wrong?" Isabela asked breathlessly. Hawke shook her head slowly.

"I...I can't do this..." she said abruptly, pushing herself away from the table and sliding out from where Isabela had trapped her. She was shaking, caught in two minds. One was screaming at her to continue, while the other was telling her stopping this was the right thing to do.

Isabela stared after her as she walked to the other side of the cell. The Rivaini followed her and reached out, touching Lana's cheek and turning the woman's to face her. She could still see the desire which had been there before, burning in Hawke's eyes. But there was something else now too.

Lana shook her head again, staring at Isabela's confusion and disappointment, "I can't, Bela..."

Isabela frowned, "Can't what?" she asked alluringly, pressing her body against Hawke's once more. She could feel the want from Lana, the craving inside of her to go through with this, but the woman was still trying to hold back for some reason. Maybe she needed some encouragement.

Isabela took the woman's face in her hands and kissed her once more. She ran her tongue along hers, savouring every movement. Hawke was becoming like an addiction for her. Lana kissed her back, a moan of longing escaping her as she felt Isabela's body against hers once more. After several seconds though, she pulled back again. She rested her forehead against the Rivaini's, looking at the floor, exhaling. Isabela caressed Lana's face, curling her fingers under the woman's chin and tilting her head up to look at her again. Her amber eyes poured into Lana's as though searching for an answer to her hesitation.

"Hawke...," she whispered, "Why do you keep fighting this? You know as well as I do that we both want it to happen."

Lana bit her lip. She knew Isabela was right...but she couldn't do it. Aveline's warning rang heavily in her head then, and she knew that no matter what happened in this moment, no matter how pleasurable it might be, Isabela would hurt her in the long run.

"I do want this..." Lana admitted, "But..."

"But what?" Isabela asked, still staring into her eyes.

Lana shook her head, "But it's a bad idea..."

Isabela looked confused. "How?" she asked, "It's just sex."

As soon as the pirate's words left her mouth, Lana knew this was the right decision. She pulled Isabela's hands away from her face and straightened off the bars of her cell, forcing the pirate's body and hers apart.

"I've had one night stands before, Bela," Lana said, "And I can tell the difference between that and this..."

Isabela stared after her as Hawke made her way over to the table and leaned her against it, half sitting on the edge.

"I'm not going to fall in love with you if that's what you're worried about," the Rivaini said. "You know I don't play that way."

Lana folded her arms and sighed, "I know," she said, "But I also know this isn't going to end well. There's something else between us, Bela...and I know you feel it too."

Isabela made her way over to the table and leaned on it beside Hawke. The woman was right, even if she didn't want to admit it.

"And what's so bad about that?" Isabela asked, "Doesn't chemistry make the sex more enjoyable?"

Lana turned to her, pointedly. Isabela looked back. She then finally realised what Hawke was referring to by 'bad idea'.

"You... mean me, don't you?" she stated. Lana said nothing but the pirate could see the truth in her eyes. Isabela snorted once silently, and got to her feet, shaking her head. She walked to the cell bars and leaned on them. "I'm the bad idea..."

"I can't trust you, Bela," Lana said sadly, "You know I'll help you find this damn relic and get Castillon off your back...but we both know the moment you get your ship you're going to sail far away from this place and not give a damn about what you've left behind."

Isabela exhaled angrily. She hated when people thought they knew her. "You think you've got me all figured out, Hawke," she said bitterly.

"Am I wrong?" Lana asked, taking a few steps towards her. Isabela turned to face her, her temper rising.

"What gives you the right to judge me?" Isabela asked angrily, "We're the same, Hawke...whether you want to admit it or not. We both use people to get what we want then discard them. Stop pretending you're better than I am!"

"I don't think I'm better than you, Bela," Hawke replied, her own anger flaring. "But the difference between us is that I've still got something left to hold on to...and I can't let anything I feel for you jeopardise that!"

"When are you going to open your eyes, Hawke?" Isabela yelled, "The only thing you had left is now locked in the Gallows!... _Bethany_ was the only thing you had worth holding on to. You still don't understand that no matter what you do, your mother is never going to love you the way she used to!"

Before Lana could stop herself she swung her fist forwards, punching Isabela square in the jaw. The two women began to scuffle on the ground, their knees and elbows scraping off the hard stone floor as they wrestled. Hawke felt Isabela dig her in the ribs and take the wind out of her. The pirate was on top of her now, trying to restrain her flailing arms. Lana reached up again and smacked her on the face. Isabela rolled to the side and Lana dived on top of her. She was so furious with her. There was shouting nearby, but neither woman could hear as they continued to brawl. Then suddenly a bucket of ice-cold water was thrown over them both.

"What in the name of Andraste are you two playing at!? Break it up!" Aveline yelled angrily. Hawke climbed off Isabela and they sat beside each other in a large puddle, breathing heavily, completely soaked to the skin now. They both glared at each other and then up at Aveline. "Any more fights and I'll put you in separate cells!" The Guard Captain yelled. "Maker's Breath!" She walked off, shaking her head in disbelief.

Neither Isabela nor Hawke moved for a few seconds. Hawke was holding her side and blood was oozing from Isabela's lip. The pirate scooped water in her hand and flicked it over Lana before getting to her feet and walking to the edge of the cell. She leaned on the bars, water dripping from the end of her clothes. Lana remained on the ground, staring up at her. Finally Isabela spoke.

"I wasted a long time trying to gain my mother's approval, Hawke," she said bitterly, though speaking at a normal level now. "But in the end nothing ever came of it...so I moved on."

Hawke shook her head. "I'm not you, Bela."

The pirate turned back to her. "Leandra doesn't deserve you, Hawke. She has blamed you for the death of your brother and for the situation she finds herself in and _neither_ is your fault...even though I know you blame yourself as well. The woman has made you miserable and you're just too damn blind to see it."

"Shut your mouth!" Lana said through gritted teeth, "You know nothing about my family, Bela!"

Isabela sighed. She hadn't meant to make her angry again. "Look..." the pirate paused, "I'm sorry for what I said...and you're right, I don't know your family...but you know deep down what I speak is the truth."

Lana shook her head as she stared up at the Rivaini. "You really will go to low lengths to get what you want, Isabela."

The Rivaini shook her head, "I'm not doing this for me, Hawke...I'm not trying to use your family problems to convince you to sleep with me. Believe what you want...but I'm doing this for you..."

The pirate walked back towards Lana then and reached out a hand. Hawke looked up at her, wondering why Isabela had opened up to her like this. She hesitated, staring into the woman's eyes, then staring at her outstretched hand. Although her words were harsh, Lana realised then that Isabela really did possess some kind of feelings for her, even though she would never admit it. The woman never was one to dish out advice before, and whether she had simply been hurt by Hawke's rejection, or genuinely cared that Hawke was busting her balls for a mother that didn't appreciate her, there was always that mutual respect between them that neither could put into words. Maybe they weren't so different after all. Hawke finally reached out and allowed Isabela to help her to her feet. The pirates give her a little nudge on the chin then, in a keep-your-head-up kind of gesture and smiled at her. Lana managed a smile back.

"You look good when you're wet," the Rivaini joked, staring down at her soaking clothes which were almost see-through. Lana sighed and shook her head. Soon both women began to laugh.

"I hate you, Bela," Hawke joked. The pirate chuckled. As Lana went to walk away, Isabela grabbed her arm. Surprised, Lana turned to her and their eyes met once more.

"Just promise me you'll think about what I said, Hawke" Isabela said softly. She leaned in and brushed her lips against Lana's gently before walking towards the table and taking a seat. Lana exhaled and turned away, leaning on the bars of her cell once more and thinking about everything that had just transpired between them.


	12. Chapter 12

_Hello all, as some of you will probably know already I'm not one to put comments in the middle of my stories, normally preferring to do so at the beginning/end, however due to the amount of support for this story I'd just like to say thanks to everyone for reading and for the great reviews. This is definitely my most popular piece to date and I hope you are all having as much fun reading it as I am writing it. I only ever really have a vague plan when I start to write something, so Maker knows where this story will end up :P...but anyway, here is the latest update ;) Enjoy!_

* * *

Hawke was imprisoned in the brig for another three months, with Isabela leaving the day after their little cell encounter. Three months for a murder was pretty small. Lana had a feeling Aveline had pulled a few strings to get her sentence lessened. The Templars usually weren't so lenient with murderers, especially when it came to the death of one of their own. The isolation in the brig gave Hawke endless hours of inescapable contemplation...even though she would have preferred to drown herself in alcohol, find a nice piece of ass and work through her problems in a more pleasurable way. As it was, the brig wasn't in the business of supplying booze or broads to prisoners (no matter how much Lana tired to convince Aveline it was a good idea). Maker, half these cells were filled with rambunctious women who could probably suck the nails out of a hardwood floor. The thought made Hawke's toes curl. She couldn't stand this type of sobriety. Blight! Why didn't she just let Isabela bend her backwards over the wooden table and take her there and then? Common sense was a real bitch! Why couldn't she just have done the wrong thing for a change...literally! If she had known then how long she would have to spend in this shithole, would she have let the pirate have her way with her? Lana tried not to keep second guessing the whole situation between the two of them. She had made her decision, and no matter what her sex-deprived mind was telling her, it _was _the right one.

The sexual frustration continued to wear Lana down as the weeks passed. Some nights, as she lay on the hard stone floor with nothing more than a paper-thin mattress and a dirty, stained sheet, she would close her eyes and allow her hand to slip down her body and slide under the waistband of her pants to ease the throbbing ache below. Her mind would flash back to that windmill in Lothering, remembering the taste of that forbidden fruit she had savoured all those years ago. Her mouth still watered at the thought. Maker bless Sister Leliana and that magical touch of hers! What Lana wouldn't give to feel the woman's lips on hers once more, the slender fingers stroking slowly along her skin, sliding up the inside of her leg before-

"SERAH HAWKE!"

Lana jumped from her slumber and sat up. For the love of Andraste why did someone always wake her when she was dreaming of Leliana? It was so bloody unfair! Realising she had fallen asleep with her hand still down her pants, Lana quickly and discreetly removed it before turning to the cell door. A Guardsman was fiddling with the keys in the lock.

"What's going on?" Lana asked getting to her feet. Her body was permanently stiff from how uncomfortable she'd been for the past few months sleeping rough. She groaned like an old woman, finally managing to raise herself off the floor. The Guard held the cell door wide open and waited expectantly.

"You're free to go, Serah," he said, "The Captain would like to see you before you depart. She's in her office."

"Aww blast! I was just getting used to this place," Hawke joked, feeling suddenly light-hearted at the good news. She exhaled and exited the cell, finally a free woman.

Aveline brought Lana up to date with the recent goings on in the city and informed her there was still no word of Bethany's fate, though the Guardswoman was keeping an ear out. Hawke knew that the numerous mages in the Circle would no doubt be suffering the brunt of the Templar fury, her sister probably among them. She felt extremely guilty, knowing that it was her fault. But what was she supposed to have done? Let her sister be trailed to the Gallows and not even bat an eyelash? Bethany had been her best friend since they were little. She had reacted instinctively, seeing her in Templar hands and now others were going to pay the price for her actions.

The whole time she had been imprisoned, Lana had killed Anders a hundred times over in her mind, each way more painful and torturous than the last. The Guard Captain had warned her off though, threatening her with another month inside if she did anything remotely life-altering to the mage.

"I mean it Hawke," Aveline said sternly, point her finger at her in warming. She had just handed Hawke a chest full of the first instalment of gold from her Deep Roads earnings (courtesy of Varric) and was now going to lecture her no doubt. The redhead never could resist a good telling-off. "I don't want to see you back here in a few days for a second murder."

"What about torture?" Lana asked, smiling cheekily. The Guardswoman glared at her for not taking this seriously. "Assault?... Can I at least give Anders another kick in the balls?"

Aveline got to her feet and leaned over the large wooden desk. "Not funny, Hawke. Just stay away from him," she scolded, unimpressed with her jokes. At least she hoped they were jokes. "Don't think I won't put you away for another month. Promise me you won't go looking for trouble."

"Trouble usually finds me, Aveline. You know that," Hawke said, smirking still.

"Hawke..." Aveline warned through gritted teeth, "Promise."

"But-"

"Promise me!" the Captain implored, giving Lana that 'don't-mess-with- me' look. Maker, the redhead was scary sometimes. Hawke scanned the Guardswoman's arms of steel and came to the conclusion that she never wanted to find herself in a headlock by her. She groaned in defeat.

"Oh all right!" she relented.

"Say it!" Aveline pressed

"Oh come on-"

"Say it!"

Lana exhaled. Andraste's ass, Aveline wasn't taking any chances.

"Fine," Hawke said grumpily, "I promise I won't beat Anders to a pulp and strangle him with his own entrails."

Aveline rolled her eyes. She knew that was as good a promise as she was going to get. She went back to her desk full of paper work then, and Lana took it as her cue to leave. Ah, that sweet sense of freedom! How she'd missed it! A heavy chest of gold and a lighted heart. _I wonder how long they will last._

Although Hawke had promised Aveline she would leave Anders be, she couldn't help searching for a loop-hole which would permit her to flay him alive. If the mage knew what was good for him, he would stay out of her face. She didn't need another excuse to break it.

As much as she longed for a pint in The Hanged Man, she decided it would be best to check in on her mother. After all this chest of coin was for the Estate, and Lana couldn't really see herself living there now with out Bethany in the picture. It had been her sister and her mothers dream, not hers. Leandra would no doubt be in pieces over losing Bethany (and be in dire need someone to blame no doubt). Hawke wondered why she continuously went back to the woman. Was she just a sucker for punishment? Maybe Isabela was right. But just because her mother had stopped loving her didn't mean that Lana could just switch off her feelings as well. Family was the most important thing to her, even if her family didn't actually include her. Leandra could disown her daughter all she wanted but Lana would use every last ounce of strength she had to prove she wasn't a failure. She didn't know whether that would be enough though. Her strength was already running dangerously low. How much could a person be stretched before they snapped? Now that Bethany was gone there were only two Hawke's left. The once happy family was rotting away into nothing. Could something be saved if it is already in the process of self-destructing?

Hawke hesitated outside the door of Gamlen's home. She took a few deep breaths, steeling herself for what awaited her inside. _Why do I keep doing this to myself?_ There was nothing to stop her from simply turning her back on all of this shit and having that long-awaited pint in The Hanged Man with Isabela and Varric. Leandra didn't even come to visit her in the brig all those months. Why should she care about a woman who clearly didn't give a damn about her? _Maker's Breath, I can't deal with this anymore._ _Please...someone just tell me what to do! _

As soon as the words entered Lana's head, the front door opened. Lana looked up in surprise. She was now standing face to face with her mother. A lump formed in her throat.

"Lana..."

Lana couldn't find her voice. She was breathing heavily, caught in two minds whether to run, or to stand there and take what ever her mother threw at her this time. What should she do? A moment of silence passed between them. Leandra's face was wrecked with grief. She still had that look in her eye that Lana couldn't stand. Hawke shook her head then, realising that she just didn't have the strength to carry her mother's burdens any more. She placed the chest of gold on the ground at Leandra's feet and turned her back on her, walking away without a word.

"Lana..."

Her mother's voice was louder this time, forcing Hawke to a halt. She paused, her foot faltering at the top step. _Please...I can't do this anymore. I'm finished. _She heard soft footsteps behind her. A gentle hand then placed itself on her shoulder. Lana closed her eyes and shook her head. She couldn't turn back.

"Lana, look at me..."

Reluctantly, Lana spun slowly to stare back at her mother's tortured expression. Leandra gazed at her with sad eyes. Then she did something Hawke didn't expect. She opened her arms wide and pulled her eldest daughter into an embrace, holding her tightly against her chest like she did when Lana she was little. Hawke froze. She couldn't even lift her arms to hug her back, but leaned against her mother's chest, feeling her strong arms around her, and tried to come to terms with the first sign of affection her mother had shown towards her in over two years. She had no words.

After a few minutes (or was it hours?) Leandra finally pulled back. She took Lana's face in her hands and stared down at her daughter, seeing the pain in her eyes.

"I'm sorry," Leandra said sincerely, "I'm _so_ sorry, my love..."

Lana's eyes filled with tears as she stared up at her mother. She still couldn't find anything to say.

"I've hurt you, Lana, I know, " Leandra continued, a tear falling down her cheek, "I have blamed you for everything that's happened these past two years...and now Bethany's gone too..."

Hawke pealed her mother's hands away from her face then and took a step back. She shook her head then. "Don't you dare pin that on me." Her voice was shaking with anger that she couldn't control. "Don't you _dare..."_

Leandra shook her head quickly then and took a step towards Lana again, "I'm not, I swear! That wasn't your fault, Lana. If anything it was mine...I was the one who asked you to leave her behind."

Hawke was stunned. She couldn't believe her mother had finally admitted to having done wrong. Leandra had finally taken the blame for something instead of passing in onto her eldest. But there was still judgement in her eyes.

"However you still blame me for Carver?" Lana asked. Leandra didn't reply. She saw the truth on her face laughed bitterly and turned away, beginning to walk down the steps. Enough was enough.

"Lana wait!" Leandra called.

Fuming, Lana turned back to her for the last time. Leandra walked down the steps towards her. She withdrew a letter from her pocket at handed it to her.

"What is this?" Lana asked harshly, holding it limply.

"It's the deed to the Estate," Leandra said, "The Viscount has allowed us to reclaim it."

Hawke took a glance at the envelope and passed it back to her mother in disgust. "I don't want it," she said bitterly. Leandra pushed the letter back towards her.

"There's a letter from Bethany inside there as well. It's addressed to you."

Lana's heart warmed. She tore open the envelope at once and pulled out the smaller piece of parchment. Her little sister's handwriting almost jumped off the page towards her. Each word was like one burden lessened off her shoulders, a gentle embrace from the person she cared most about in the world.

_Dearest Sister,_

_ I hope this letter finds you well. I miss you more than you know. My time in the Circle has been bearable, even though the Templars made a point of putting me through the Harrowing as soon as I arrived. Knight Captain Cullen has been very kind to me. He's a nice man...for a Templar. I'm doing fine so please don't worry about me!_

_I'm sorry for how this all worked out. I know you warned me that working with Anders was dangerous but I felt I had to make the decision by myself. I'm not a child any longer, even though it may be hard for you to realise it. You'll always be my big sister no matter how old I am, and I guess that's something I'll just have to live with. _

_Don't be sad. Even if we can't see each other anymore, I'm not that far away. Take care of mother. She needs you now more than ever. I know that's asking a lot considering how harshly she has treated you, but please do this for me. I'll rest easier knowing she is safe._

_Take care of yourself (and stop drinking so much!)_

_With love,_

_Bethany _

Lana read the letter several times over, smiling to herself. Maker, she missed her sister so much it physically hurt! Leandra smiled as she watched Lana's expression. She hadn't read the letter but could tell it was good news. Lana looked up at her mother then. As much as this was going to kill her she had to try, for Bethany's sake.

"I'll meet with the Viscount tomorrow and buy you the Estate back," she said. Her mother smiled at her.

"And you'll come to live with me in it?" Leandra asked. Lana hesitated.

"I don't know," she said with a sigh. "I need time, Mother...A lot has been said and done... And I just don't think I have any more fight left in me."

Leandra reached out and placed a hand on Hawke's arm. "Then let's not fight anymore...Let's just move on...start a new life together."

Lana exhaled. This was a lot to take in all at once. "I...I..."

"Take as much time as you need, darling," Leandra said gently, "I'll be here."

Her mother leaned in and kissed her on the forehead. Maker she seemed to have changed overnight! _Am I dreaming? _After several seconds Lana shook her head, trying to regain herself. This whole thing had just messed with her head over and over. When would it end?

"I'm going for a drink..." She had only been in her mothers company for ten minutes and it was already too much to take.

"You only just got back!" Leandra called after her. "Where are you going?"

"The Hanged Man, Mother. Don't worry about me." Hawke called over her shoulder.

She walked around Lowtown for a while, trying to clear her head. It seemed like she was going to get no peace at all today. Between Aveline's lecture and her mother's new-found desire to rebuild their broken relationship, Hawke felt like her head was going to explode. There was only one cure for that: A large bottle of Whiskey and a few games of Diamondback. Hawke rounded a corner near the Alienage, still lost in thought and walked straight into someone, knocking them to the ground.

"Oh shit! I'm so sorry, I...Merrill?"

The elf lay flat on her back, looking shaken and disoriented from the fall. Hawke reached out her hand and helped her to her feet, trying not to laugh. "What are you doing out at this hour? It's dangerous to walk these streets alone."

"Oh hello, Hawke. I-I got lost. I was using the ball of twine which Varric gave me to find my way back but-but someone cut it and...well, now I don't know where I am." She squeaked. "I'm so happy to bump into you-well not actually bump into you, I mean-I'm so happy to see you...I'm babbling aren't I?"

This time Hawke could not hold in her laugh. She looked down and Merrill's other hand to see the remains of her ball of twine.

"Merrill, your house is right around this corner. You're almost home." Hawke said chuckling. "Come on, I'll walk you back."

"El'gernahn! I've been walking in circles this whole time? The streets all look the same in the dark," she said, following Hawke through Lowtown. Within a couple of minutes they had reached Merrill's little, run-down home. It made Gamlen's shack look like a palace in comparison.

"Here you are, Merrill," Hawke said kindly, standing outside her house. "Back safe and sound."

"Thank you so much, Hawke. Do you want to come in? I have...water."

Hawke chuckled again. "It's fine Merrill. I definitely need something stronger than water, the day I've had! And I've been locked up for three months. The tavern is calling me. I'll come and see you tomorrow though, if you like."

"Oh please do! I missed you while you were in prison," she said walking into her house, "See you Hawke. And thank you again!"

* * *

"Well, well, someone finally let the Hawke out of its cage!"

"A jigger of your finest for my friend over here!"

Hawke smiled at Varric and Isabela and seated herself beside them. She exhaled, right back where she belonged: The Hanged Man. _Sorry Bethany, but I deserve a little drink after everything. _Varric clapped her on the back.

"How are you holding up?" he asked, "Did Aveline rough you up in the brig?"

"I spent the majority of my time wet," Hawke replied.

"You're not the only one," Isabela said, smirking cheekily. She placed the drink in front of Lana and gave her a wink, both women remembering their brief tumble in the cell (the first one particularly).

"Ho! I'm sensing a story here!" the dwarf said excitedly, seeing that sly look on each woman's face. That only meant one thing where Isabela and Hawke were concerned. Lana laughed and helped herself to Isabela's bottle of port.

"Oh, it was nothing, Varric," The Rivaini said, waving her hand, "Hawke punched me in the face but it turns out she's not as good a fighter as you might think."

"Didn't stop you from hitting the deck though did it?" Hawke teased.

"I did get on top eventually," Isabela said with a chuckle, "Sore ribs?"

"Sore everything," Hawke moaned, making the other two laugh. She took a long drink, straight from the bottle. Ah Maker! How she would love one of Isabela's massages right now. Lana quivered just thinking about it. But she had closed that door for herself. And it was a door best left locked.

"So is my coin safe or not?" Varric asked, "Isabela's been trying to wrangle these two damn sovereigns out of me for a while now. The only way I'm going to hand it over is if I hear the words directly from Hawke's mouth."

Lana rolled her eyes. "Been telling fibs about me again, Bela?"

"Oh, Hawke, you're going to have sex with me eventually," Isabela replied, grinning, "I'm just trying to get Varric to give me an advance on my winnings."

"Whatever," Lana said, "We've had this discussion already, Bela."

"Oh I know, Sweet thing. But we never got to finish," Isabela reached across the table and ran her hand up Hawke's arm. "I had a point...and I had just put my _finger_ on it...Then you interrupted me."

Lana shuddered. She knew exactly what 'point' Isabela had put her finger on. The memory of it made Hawke moist a little. Isabela's smirk was getting wider, seeing the effect her words had, reflect on Lana's face. Andraste's Ass! She must do a better job of controlling her facial expressions. Especially now, after she had told Isabela they were never going to happen. The Rivaini bit her lip, her eyes tracing over the shape of Hawke's breasts under her shirt. Maker, what she wouldn't give to grab a handful of those again.

"Stop staring at my breasts, Bela!" Lana said, crossing her arms to cover them. Isabela giggled.

"Oh Hawke I've already done so much more than stare...Or don't you remember?"

Hawke cursed inwardly. Isabela now knew her reasons for stopping whatever this was between them from going any further, but she clearly didn't care. The pirate was still going to come after her, selfish or not.

"Don't you?" Lana countered, referring to her (eventual) rejection of Isabela's advances back in the cell. Varric looked on, confused. He had never heard them speak so seriously before. There was a hint of a joke still left in their words...but only a hint. Isabela's smile faltered as she realised Lana was reluctant to play their games any more. The woman must have really meant what she said back in the cell.

The Rivaini didn't care though. Hawke could think she knew her all she wanted. But maybe if the woman gave her a chance then she'd find something worth sticking around for, rather than taking off on a ship the first opportunity she got. Lana was scared though, and to be honest Isabela couldn't blame her. The pirate was already aware she had a tendency for hurting people. That was the reason she never went past a certain point in relationships (that point being the bedroom). She enjoyed Lana's company and had never desired anyone more in her life, but how deep that desire went was unclear, and skin deep was all Isabela was looking for.

"I do remember," the pirate replied eventually. The cheeky smirk appeared on her face once more. "But I didn't say it would stop me from trying..."


	13. Chapter 13

Gamlen sauntered into the Hightown Estate which once belonged to the Amells, bringing with him the smell of alcohol, sweat and some whore's perfume. Well, perfume was maybe not the right word to describe it. Let's say _stench_. He had undoubtedly just come straight from a session at The Blooming Rose and hadn't gone home to change. Hawke didn't know what was worse, the fact that he spent the majority of his time there or the fact that it was her coin he was spending. She felt as though she was inadvertently supplying her uncle with..._pleasure_ (ugh, the thought!). Gamlen accepted a cup of wine from the man-servant Bodhan who had taken up permanent residence in 'Casa de Hawke' along with his son Sandal. Lana hadn't asked him, but the dwarf had still wanted to repay her for saving Sandal's life in The Deep Roads so she accepted his offer of being her man-servant. The dwarf almost welled up when she refused him at first. He was pleasant enough to have around though, even if Sandal kept swinging off the chandeliers and making things explode.

Gamlen entered the study and his eyes caught Hawke, who was sitting at the table reading a letter, swirling a glass of whiskey in her hand. He sipped his wine as he hovered behind her, trying to read over her shoulder. Lana wrinkled her nose and looked up from her letter in disgust, realising she wasn't alone. She didn't even have to turn to see who it was.

"Maker's Breath Uncle! Did you roll around in dog shit?" she asked, placing her glass on the table and covering her mouth and nose.

"So... back then are you?" he snarled, ignoring his nieces jibes. He'd lived with her for years. She'd said worse to him. He seated himself at the table. "Didn't think to leave a note? We were worried about you!"

"Well I'm sure the local whore at The Blooming Rose helped you through it," Hawke replied sarcastically."I take it you 'found' the coin in my room again like last time?"

"Well...I...I didn't want it to go to waste on..."

"On what, Uncle? Food? Clothes? An estate? Now why would we need any of those?" Hawke asked , her voice still heavy with sarcasm. "As long as you get your hole every night, everything is great right?"

Hawke laughed at her own joke and turned back to her letter.

"Oy! Don't speak to me like that, you little scamp!" Gamlen replied angrily, taking another sip of his wine. "You need to learn to show me some respect, girl!"

"Well, it's a little hard to when you still reek of _vagina_!" Hawke said disgustedly. Gamlen choked on his wine and dribbled it all over his front.

"Andraste's Ass, Lana!" he exclaimed, wide-eyed.

"What? There's no use beating around the bush, Uncle...oh, wait you already did!" Hawke chuckled again. Isabela would have been proud of that one. The pirate's face entered her mind then. She hadn't seen her in a few weeks. Since she'd moved into Hightown a year and a half ago, they had seen little of each other. Lana got the feeling Isabela was avoiding her now since she lived among the rich folk. The Rivaini preferred to slum it in Lowtown taverns, where there was always someone at hand for a quickie. Everyone in Hightown was interested in courting or going out to fancy dinners and parties. Lana had to admit, it wasn't really her scene here either. Although she'd gained status in Kirkwall after the expedition, she couldn't have fitted in if she'd tried. So she didn't even attempt to put on airs when she was in company. A feat which greatly annoyed her mother.

After much contemplation over the year or so which followed Bethany's imprisonment in the Gallows, Lana finally decided to take a chance and move back in with her mother again. She had bought back the Estate from the Viscount and allowed Leandra to move in without her at first, staying in The Hanged Man herself for the better part of the year while she considered her options. If not for Bethany, Lana wouldn't have bothered. But how could she deny her sister's last request? Leandra was pleasant enough for the most part and their relationship had at last begun to rebuild. They were financially stable now (and then some!) which had helped ease the pressure a little bit. There were still many things left unsaid between them though, but maybe they were better left that way. Hawke couldn't take any more fighting. After everything that had happened, she just needed a bit of normality. And Leandra it seemed was willing to grant her wish.

"Seen that pirate friend of yours recently?" Gamlen asked, disturbing Lana from her letter once more. Hawke looked at him curiously.

"No...Why?" she asked suspicious.

"She was at the Rose last night," Gamlen informed her, "Bitch rejected me, so she did."

Hawke snorted with laughter then. Her Uncle had actually tried to hit on Isabela? She didn't know whether to feel appalled, angry, or regretful that she hadn't been there to see it. It would have made for interesting entertainment. What would Uncle Gamlen say if he found out his niece had gotten further with the Rivaini than he could ever hope to?

"What's so funny, girl?" Gamlen asked, seeing Hawke still chuckling. "You think she's out of my league?"

"Oh Gamlen..." Lana replied, almost crying with laughter, "Isabela wouldn't touch you in a million years!" (She's too busy trying to seduce me)

"Hmpf...Well you would probably know what she likes more than anyone," Gamlen huffed. Lana frowned then. She placed her letter back on the table and stared at her uncle.

"What do you mean by that?" she asked, confused. Gamlen sneered at her then. It was clear he knew something she didn't.

"Friend I know saw you two together down at the Docks one night," Gamlen said, grinning smugly. Lana felt like a rock had slammed into her stomach. She knew what Gamlen was referring to, why there was a stupid looking, satisfied smile on his face. That was the first night Isabela had tried to really seduce her. She remembered it like it was yesterday, could still feel the pirate's hands as they edged down towards her... If someone had been watching them, they would have no doubt seen the Rivaini press herself up against Lana from behind, leaning over her where she sat and kissing along her neck, her hands sliding all over Lana's body. To any onlookers, seeing Lana with her eyes closed, biting her lip, it probably seemed like she was enjoying it. And she was. But little did they know, she was also having an inner battle with herself on how to escape.

Gamlen started to laugh at the look on Hawke's face. His words had just been confirmed.

"So you're little secrets finally out then?" he teased. Hawke glared at him and picked up her letter again, pretending not to care.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she mumbled.

"You've been slipping in and out of that pirate wench, haven't you?" Gamlen asked, sneering at her, "That's why she won't go out with me!"

"Oh shut up Gamlen, I haven't done anything of the sort!" Lana replied, trying to sound convincing. She avoided her uncle's eyes and kept her head low. Technically she _was _telling him the truth. The furthest she and Isabela had ever gotten was a few passionate kisses and very light brazing here and there. Still, admitting that to Gamlen would finally mean admitting she was attracted to women. She had never told anyone that before. Her uncle's head might explode at the thought.

"Don't _lie_," Gamlen continued. He knew she wasn't being entirely truthful. The guilt was written all over Hawke's face, no matter how hard she tried to hide it. "I know you're little secret now, girly. Your mother's just going to love this!"

Lana withdrew the knife hidden in her belt at the speed of light and slammed it down on the table between Gamlen's fingers. Her uncle froze and looked at her in shock. His goblet of wine had spilt due to the force with which the table shook and clattered to the floor. Hawke leaned over the table, her hand still leaning on the dagger.

"If you so much as mention this to Mother," she said angrily, "The next time, Uncle...I won't miss."

With one strong tug she yanked the knife out of the table and got to her feet, stowing her letter in her pocket. She knocked back the remains of her whiskey and slammed the glass down onto the table before walking to the door and leaving the Estate.

* * *

Isabela opened the front door of The Blooming Rose and exited into the blinding sunlight. She rubbed her eyes, screwing up her face, trying to keep her raging hangover at bay. Last night had been fun. Jethann was always more willing to entertain some if her more adventurous ideas. Pity he still couldn't stop talking about that damned Ninette woman though. Just because Isabela had been with Hawke when she found her finger didn't mean she wanted to speculate over the woman's death. She'd have rather he referred to his own fingers instead and got to work. Two damn sovereigns and half of them were spent talking. What a waste.

As Isabela made her way through the Red Lantern District she saw Hawke in the distance. The woman had a stony face. _She's probably had another argument with that bitch of a mother of hers, _Isabela thought to herself. It was the first time in weeks she'd seen her. The pirate smiled to herself. She would know that strut anywhere. Isabela wondered if Hawke knew the effect her ass had on people when it moved that way. She never seemed to notice the numerous men (and a few women) who checked her out as she walked. She only seemed to notice when Isabela did it. The Rivaini wondered why that was. She shook the thought from her mind and rushed ahead to meet her.

"Ouch!"

Hawke jumped and turned around, her hand covering her bum. Isabela was there, wearing that familiar smirk on her face. She had evidently just spanked Lana across the backside and was feeling rather pleased with herself.

"Do you have to do that so hard?" Hawke complained, smiling back. Isabela chuckled.

"Pain is half the pleasure, Sweetness."

They both laughed and continued walking side by side. Hightown was bustling with shoppers and merchants. They eyed Isabela with disdain as she passed. The Rivaini didn't seem to care though.

"So how was The Blooming Rose?" Lana asked. She could smell the same scent coming from Isabela that she had smelt from Gamlen earlier. Somehow though, it didn't seem to repulse her as much when it came from the pirate.

"How did you know I was there?" Isabela asked, curiously, "Spying on me?"

"As if," Hawke said, throwing her a look, "You're not that interesting, Bela...Bit too predictable for my liking."

Without another word the pirate shoved her roughly against the wall of a passing building. People walking by began to stare as Isabela pressed herself into Lana and brushed a lock of hair from her face. Hawke was stunned.

"Bet you didn't predict that," Isabela whispered seductively, smiling. Hawke tried to push her away. People were watching them.

"Not here, Bela. Its broad daylight," Hawke hissed back. The pirate wasn't fazed though.

"And?" she asked playfully, glancing down at Lana's lips and biting her own in anticipation. She groaned slightly. She was slowly leaning in closer. Hawke could feel her heart thumping wildly as the Rivaini's breasts pressed up against hers. She could see the neighbours whispering, giving them icy, disapproving stares. Isabela's hand placed itself on her waist then. She could see Hawke's chest rise and fall rapidly, trying unsuccessfully to control herself.

"And...And..." Lana breathed. Isabela's face hovered inches from hers. She knew the closeness was torturing Lana. Her smouldering amber eyes were almost making Hawke hyperventilate. "I...can't..."

"Why do you keep saying that?" Isabela whispered, "I'm not trying to have sex with you...And we've done _this_ before. So what are you so afraid of?"

"Them," Hawke whispered, glancing over the Rivaini's shoulder at the passing Hightown shoppers staring at them. Isabela turned slightly and saw the small crowd of nobles which had amassed at the closest market stalls. They were all staring at the two women pressed together against the wall in a socially unacceptable way. Isabela smiled slyly. Even this was too risqué for the Kirkwall highborn. She caressed her hand along Lana's side, and cupped her hips, feeling the woman quiver slightly beneath her touch.

"Why do you care what they think?" The Rivaini asked her quietly.

"I don't," Lana replied"...But... I care what my mother thinks."

Isabela sighed. They were back to Leandra again. Why in the Maker's name couldn't Lana just see that the woman made her life a misery and stop trying to win her back? She was still trying to impress her, gain her respect. She held a love for the woman, which she didn't deserve. But Isabela knew that Leandra was only using her. The woman may have become friendlier towards her in the last few years, but that was only because Lana owned the Estate now and she was beginning to be someone in this city. However, Hawke just continued to run back to her like some lost puppy dog. She'd complain about her one minute, then suck up to her the next. It was really starting to piss Isabela off.

"And what would your _dear _mother say if she saw me holding you like this?" The Rivaini asked, "If she saw us kissing passionately against a wall in front of all of the nobles in Kirkwall?"

Hawke gulped. She could only imagine. There was a hint of irritation in Isabela's voice at the mention of Leandra, but Lana didn't care. It wasn't Isabela's place to disapprove of her relationship with her mother.

"Does she not know you like women?" the pirate asked lightly. She leaned in even closer until Hawke could feel her warm breath on her face. Lana's mouth watered. She stared down at Isabela's lips cautiously. They were dangerously close to hers now. She swallowed. Her attention was momentarily distracted from the gathering crowd of nobles nearby. Her mother could quite easily be among them. Or the nobles could know her and tell Leandra what they had seen.

"No..." Hawke said finally, "She doesn't..."

Isabela pulled back slightly. "You... do then?" she asked, surprised a little. Lana's sexuality had been a constant source of interest for her. She had pestered her for the years they had known each other, trying desperately to make her break. Never once had Hawke gave her any kind of answer though. Until now.

Lana nodded slowly. She was finally answering the Rivaini's favourite question.

"And...you don't like...?" Isabela pressed further. Hawke shook her head firmly. The two of them stared at each other momentarily. Hawke felt the pirate exhale. She stepped back then and tugged Lana away from the wall. They both began to walk quickly in the direction of Lowtown, though neither having even said where they were going. It sort of went without saying.

"Does anyone know you're little secret?" Isabela asked then, when they were finally out of the nobles prying eyes. Hawke cringed. _Little secret. _Gamlen had used the exact same words. It made her feel uneasy.

"No one," Lana replied, "Not even Bethany."

Isabela's eyes widened. She had thought the Hawke sisters told each other everything. Apparently not.

"Why not?" Isabela asked. "Why all the secrecy? It's not that big of deal."

Lana snorted, "Have you met my family, Bela? Don't you think there's enough scandal as it is?"

Isabela chuckled, "Still...Why keep it to yourself?"

Hawke shrugged. "I dunno...I guess it's just never really come up before."

"It came up with Bethany though," Isabela reminded her, "How come you didn't tell her then?"

Lana hesitated. "That's complicated."

"Oooo, I'm sensing scandal here!" Isabela said excitedly. Lana chuckled. Isabela's smile widened. "Spill it, Hawke!"

Hawke sighed, "All right," she relented. _I can't believe I'm doing this._ "I...I had sex with one of my sister's friends back in Lothering...Actually I had sex with several of her friends back in Lothering but this one...she was, _different._"

Isabela's mouth fell open. "Oh Hawke! And I thought I was the whore."

"I didn't say you weren't," Hawke said, smirking at her. Isabela slapped her arm.

"Oh ha ha," she joked, "Anyway...how was this one woman different from the others?"

Hawke couldn't keep the smile from her face. She turned to face Isabela who was staring at her expectantly.

"She was a Chantry Sister."

Isabela stopped in the middle of the street, her eyes almost popping out of her head. Several passers-by gave her weird looks. A huge smile spread across her face.

"You didn't!" she exclaimed, "Hawke! I can't believe you haven't told me this before! Why haven't you told me this before? All of the boring shit we've talked about and all that time you've been holding this inside?"

Lana laughed, "Come on, let's get a drink."

The two women entered The Hanged Man and took up their usual seats in the corner, getting a bottle of whiskey between them. The Rivaini continued to question her.

"So how was she?" Isabela asked, "I assume she was a virgin."

Hawke made a face, "Emm...I don't think so. She knew how to pleasure me better than I did. She was something else, Bela. Red hair, pale skin, definitely the best sex I've ever had!" Isabela laughed.

"Only because you haven't had me yet," she joked, throwing her a wink, "Did it happen inside the Chantry?"

"A windmill," Lana replied, "on the outskirts of the city."

"Oh Hawke stop...You're making me quiver!" Isabela said. Lana laughed at the look on the Rivaini's face and handed her a shot of whiskey. They clinked mugs and knocked it back simultaneously.

"Ahh, Leliana..." Hawke sighed, remembering that night in Lothering with longing. Isabela choked on her whiskey then and her mouth fell open.

"What did you say?" she exclaimed, choking still. Lana looked up confused.

"Leliana," she repeated, "That was her name."

A weird look crossed Isabela's face then. Suddenly she threw back her head and burst into laughter. Hawke watched her in confusion.

"What's so funny?" she asked, chuckling a little herself at the Rivaini's reaction. Isabela looked at her, tears in her eyes.

"Orlesian?" she asked, "Adorable accent, fantastic curves?"

Hawke nodded. Suddenly her mouth fell wide open. "No!" she shouted in disbelief. Isabela nodded and they both fell into raucous laughter. "I don't believe it! What are the chances?"

"Oh, Leliana," Isabela said, shaking her head, "You little minx!"

"So when did you...?" Lana asked.

"During the Blight. I was staying at The Pearl in Denerim. The Hero of Ferelden showed up with Leliana, my old friend Zevran and King Alistair. Of course then he was still just a Grey Warden. The Warden wanted me to teach her how to be a Duelist after seeing me beat up a few men who were pestering me. I wanted to get to know her better first though. I suggested cards...She suggested sex."

Lana laughed, "So how did Leliana come into the whole thing?"

"She and the Warden were something of an item. Leliana wanted to come along...and naturally, I wasn't going to complain. Zevran joined us too."

The two women laughed again and threw back another shot of whiskey. They had both slept with the same woman and not even realised it all these years. Coincidence at it's best.

"She's quite feisty isn't she?" Isabela asked. Lana smiled, knowingly.

"She bites a little."

Both women sniggered and finished another shot, remembering their separate encounters with Sister Leliana. They sat and drank together for several hours. It had been a few weeks since they'd had any free time and now was as good a time as any to catch up.

"So," Isabela began a little while later, returning to her seat with a deck of cards. She started to deal. "Have you ever had sex with a man?"

"Once," Lana nodded, "It wasn't disgusting...That's about the best I could say about it."

Isabela giggled. "Maybe he just wasn't that good. I could recommend you a few if you want to try again."

Lana snorted, "No thanks, I'm knee-deep in women at the minute. Adding a man would just upset the balance."

Isabela laughed, "I bet if you told me some of their names we'd have 'crossed paths' a few more times."

Lana chuckled. The pirate was probably right. They both picked up their cards then for a game of Diamondback.

"I'm surprise you're still in Kirkwall," Hawke said, taking a sip of whiskey. "I haven't seen you in weeks. Thought you'd took off."

Isabela snorted, "And where would I go without a ship? Or that damned relic!"

She placed a few coins on the table to bet. Lana checked her cards again and met her.

"How do you even know the relic is still here?" she asked. "It's been years since the shipwreck. That's why the Viscount has had me try to appease that bloody Arishok. They're afraid the Qunari are planning something because they haven't left yet."

Isabela hesitated before taking another drink. She avoided Hawke's eyes.

"I just have a feeling it's here," she replied. "It's hard to find out information though without sticking my neck out too much. I've done my best to avoid Castillon so far."

Hawke laughed, "So starting bar brawls is your idea of keeping a low profile?" she teased, "Isabela you go out of your way to cause trouble. I'm surprised this Castillon hasn't caught up with you. All he would have to do is follow the destruction you leave behind."

Isabela chuckled, "I'm flattered, Hawke," she joked, "And by the way, half the trouble I get into is your damn fault! In fact the last bar brawl in here, you were the one who started it if I remember correctly!"

Lana laughed, remembering, "Hey, that man said I was fat and then tried to grab my ass! He deserved to get thrown into a table."

"Pity it was actually our table though," Isabela said chuckling, "All that drink wasted. I thought Varric was actually going to cry!"

"Ah shit! Was it really?" Lana asked in disbelief. She couldn't remember much from that night. It was all such a blur. Isabela laughed.

"It was!" she confirmed, "You're a bloody menace, Hawke!"

"You love it," Hawke replied, smirking. Isabela grinned back. She slid her foot along Lana's leg seductively then.

"I thought you'd finished flirting with me," the pirate teased, her voice alluring. Lana snorted.

"I didn't say that," she replied, "I don't think I could stop if I tried... I'm just saying you're never going to get into my pants."

Isabela frowned. "Then why do it?"

Lana shrugged, "Why not?"

"Because the whole point is to get _into _someone's pants, Hawke. Flirting is just mild foreplay."

Lana considered this. She stared at Isabela, seeing the longing in her eyes. She then slid her chair back and got to her feet, feeling the Rivaini's leg fall away from hers. Isabela looked up at her. She didn't want her to go yet. They were having fun. Maker, why did subject of sex always have to be so difficult with them? Lana was afraid of getting hurt, and Isabela knew she would. There was no question of her leaving Kirkwall once she got her ship. But why couldn't they just stop thinking about what would happen in the future and finally have sex? There didn't have to be strings attached. She asked Hawke this then.

"Because we can't!" Lana replied, "You may be good at hiding your feelings Bela...but I'm not."

"What _feelings_?" Isabela asked, getting to her feet as well. "Hawke I'm not in love with you! I don't fall in love. What pain could come of us just having one hot, steamy night together?"

Lana said nothing as she stared at Isabela. Finally it hit the pirate. It wasn't that Lana feared the pirate falling in love with her. Hawke was the one who had feelings...for her. That was why she didn't want to sleep with her. If she couldn't have all of Isabela then she wasn't going to hurt herself by taking what little she could. The pirate swallowed over the lump in her throat.

"Hawke-"

"Save it, Isabela," Lana said, shaking her head. "I already know what you're going to say..."

Hawke put on her jacket and threw a few coins on the table before walking to the door. Isabela called after her but she didn't stop. The pirate sat down at her chair in defeat. She watched the liquid in her mug as it swirled in circles. Why did Hawke have to make this so complicated? It could have been unbelievably simple. But now she'd gone and brought feelings into it. This whole situation was a mess right now. Isabela knocked back the last of the whiskey in her mug and got to her feet. She leaned over and checked Lana's un-played cards. The woman had had the winning hand.

"Bitch," Isabela said, smiling to herself. She threw the cards back onto the table and decided to call it a night. She didn't feel much like having sex tonight, not with anyone who wasn't Hawke anyway. She had to satisfy this burning desire within her somehow. It had gone on for too long. As Isabela took off her clothes and climbed into her double bed, she ran through scenarios in her head of how to seduce Hawke in a way where she couldn't reject. There was no chance she was giving up on sex with the woman. Lana Hawke was one of the sexiest things she had ever set eyes on. And if Leliana could have her, then so could she. It might have been 'game over' for Hawke where sex with Isabela was concerned, but Isabela still had a few more lives left, and she was going to use them wisely. Sooner or later, Lana Hawke would be pinned underneath her, at Isabela's mercy, panting for breath.


	14. Chapter 14

"Lana, darling are you in?"

Leandra entered the estate and deposited her shopping on the nearest table. The house was eerily quiet. She looked in the study just off the main hallway for her daughter and up at the mini library she had created for herself. Hawke was nowhere to be found. There were two wine goblets spilt over the table.

"Lana?" Leandra called again, re-entering the main part of the estate. Still nothing. Her mother glanced up at the balcony at the top of the stairs, wondering where Lana could have gone. She seemed content enough to stay inside today and had rejected her mother's offer to go shopping together. Leandra called Hawke a few more times, even louder than before. Suddenly she heard someone moan nearby.

"LANA?"

Lana straightened up at once. She could have sworn she just heard her mother's voice. _She can't be back this soon, _Hawke thought to herself, her heart beating frantically. She glanced up at the beautiful blonde woman lying naked in her bed, moaning erotically, her legs spread wide while Lana pleasured her below with her tongue. Blight! She couldn't remember her name. The woman's hands were intertwined in Lana's hair as she lost herself in her orgasm. They had met in one of the Hightown taverns last night and she seemed up for a good time so Hawke invited her over today, knowing full well Leandra wanted to go to the market and they would have the place to themselves. The woman smiled down her, completely at ease. Lana gave her a strained smile back.

"What's wrong?" the woman asked, playing with Lana's hair with her fingers. Hawke shook her head then. She must have imagined it. She lowered her face and continued to pleasure the woman once more. After several seconds though, she felt strange and raised her head again. The woman stopped moaning and looked down.

"Don't stop!" she complained. Lana had frozen. "Hawke, what's the matter?" Hawke ignored the question, straining her ears to listen for her name. She was sure someone had called her. This time it was unmistakable.

"Lana, I'm back," her mother called from downstairs. "Are you here?"

"Shit!" Hawke shrieked quietly, springing out of bed at once. She bounded across the room buck naked, picking up the discarded clothes which she had torn eagerly from the blond woman not half an hour ago and bundled them up in her arms before throwing them at the wet, naked lady in her bed.

"You need to go!" Hawke hissed, "Now!"

"What?" the woman asked straightening up, looking offended. She slid out of the bed and walked towards Lana, her bundle of clothes in her arms. "I thought we were having fun."

"We were," Hawke lied (the woman wasn't really to her taste). "But my mother's home now. You need to leave, quickly!"

"Ah yes, Leandra Amell," the woman said, smiling, "How nice! She's friends with my mother. I always liked her. I'll get dressed and the three of us can have dinner together. My parent's make the best..."

Hawke's mouth fell open as the woman continued to talk and she cursed inwardly. _What!? _She had no idea she had just seduced a woman who had a connection with her mother. _Nice choice, Lana, you stupid bitch. Way to keep your secret! _The woman began to put on her shirt. Suddenly there were foot steps on the stairs and Leandra's calls sounded closer.

_**Step, Step, Step.**_

"Shit! She's coming up the stairs!" Hawke whispered frantically, waving her arms. "You need to go! Quickly!"

"Are you ashamed of me?" the woman asked angrily, clearly not grasping the sense of urgency coming from Hawke. The only piece of clothing the lady had on was a shirt, open at the front. Lana had ripped the buttons off in her eagerness and the other clothes had been torn to shreds. How in Andraste's holy knickers would she ever explain this to her mother? _Oh, yeah this crazy naked lady just jumped in my window...and I just happened to be naked at the same time. _Hawke cursed out loud this time. This was why she hated sleeping with nobles. A Lowtown woman wouldn't give a damn if you were ashamed of her. And she would at least have the decency to leave before breakfast the next day or get out as quick as she could when someone was about to catch her in a compromising position. This woman clearly had no concept of panic. She was a bit dim.

"No!" Hawke whispered quickly, "You just have to go. _Now! _Use the window!"

She ushered the woman towards the open window and tried to make her go quicker. Maker's Breath, get your naked ass out!

"But I'm in the nude!" the woman exclaimed angrily.

_**Step, Step, Step**_

"Sorry," Lana said, glancing over her shoulder. Leandra's footsteps were approaching. She turned back to the woman. "Just Go! Go! Go!"

The woman swung her leg over the window ledge, still staring at Hawke.

"May I see you again?" she asked. Lana almost strangled her.

"Yeah, sure, whatever!" she replied, not really listening. The woman leaned up and grabbed Lana's face, planting a goodbye kiss on her lips.

"Another time, my love," she said in her noblewoman voice in a way she deemed romantic. She slipped down the hedging on the side of the Estate to the ground below. Thank The Maker!

_**Step, Step, Step**_

Lana bolted over to her bed and jumped under the covers just as the bedroom door squeaked open. Leandra poked her head in.

"Lana! You're here!" she said confused, "Why didn't you answer me the first time?"

Lana groaned, trying to control her heavy breathing. "I was sleeping, Mother," she lied, putting on her groggiest voice. Leandra entered the room and walked towards her bed.

"At this time?" she asked curiously.

"I...I don't feel so good," Lana complained, staring up at her mother. "I think I'm coming down with something."

Leandra sat down on the edge of the bed and placed a hand over Lana's moist forehead. She frowned.

"You're burning up, darling" she said worriedly, "You have a fever."

_Maybe because I've been having sex for the past half an hour, _Hawke joked to herself_. _She closed her eyes, playing into her mother's concern.

"Ughh...I think I'm going to go back to sleep..." she moaned, "My head hurts."

Leandra ran her hands through her daughters long brown hair which was plastered to her face with sweat.

"Good idea, darling, "she said, smiling sympathetically at her, "I'll go get you some water."

Leandra left the room and returned moments later with a mug full of ice-cold water. She sat it on Lana's nightstand. Lana kept her eyes closed, trying to avoid conversation. Her heart was in her mouth. Leandra walked to the window and drew the curtains, putting the room into semi-darkness. Lana wondered if her mother could see the half-naked woman running through the streets below, in the distance. She felt her mother approach her bed again and lean down towards her, planting a gentle kiss on the head before leaving the room. The door shut tightly behind her.

As soon as her mother's footsteps could be heard descending the stairs, Lana opened her eyes and rolled onto her back, flinging her hands over her head and exhaling with relief. Andraste's Ass! That was a close call. She couldn't imagine having to explain that to her mother. It probably would have given her a heart attack. Lana chuckled to herself. She could only imagine how Isabela would react when she told her this story later.

* * *

"Let me get this straight," the pirate said, laughing her head off, "You threw a horny, naked noblewoman out your bedroom window and made her climb down the side of your house, carrying her bundle of clothes?"

Varric, Merrill and Lana were all in hysterics. Even the normally brooding Fenris was chuckling loudly. They were seated at a table in The Hanged Man, three large, empty pitchers of ale in front of them, surrounded by playing cards.

"I know, right?" Hawke said in disbelief, "Maker's Breath, I was absolutely shitting myself about getting caught, and all this woman wanted to do was meet my mother in the nude and have tea with her!"

Roars of laughter filled the table once more, Varric slamming his hand against the table, Merrill tittering politely, Isabela leaning back on her chair and Fenris with his head in his hand. Lana giggled along with them, shaking her head. Only she would get caught in that kind of situation. It was so typical. After several minute the laughter finally faded out, everyone wiping the tears from their eyes.

Varric and Fenris got to their feet then and walked to the bar to refill the pitchers. Merrill lay her head on the table, on the verge of falling asleep. She never could handle her drink. Isabela placed a hand on Lana's leg.

"Oh, Hawke!" she said, shaking her head, still chuckling, "I can't believe you...Thank you for giving me one of the best mental images ever!"

Lana laughed, "Come on, Isabela, I'm sure you've seen better images than that," she joked. The pirate leaned in closer so as Merrill couldn't hear her.

"Only when I think of having you at my mercy back in that cell in the brig," she whispered seductively."Do you remember...?" Her hand began to slide along Hawke's thigh then. Lana felt her breath catch as Isabela moved closer to her. The Rivaini raised her other arm and rested it on the back of Lana's chair. She stared deeply into her eyes, desire rising in her own. Lana stared back, feeling herself become enticed by the smouldering, amber eyes before her.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Lana whispered back, not breaking their stare. Isabela's smile widened.

"Because I want you, Hawke...You know I do," she replied, her eyes flashing dangerously. Lana reached down and placed a hand over Isabela's, which was still caressing along her thigh.

"And _you _know that you can't have me, Bela," she said quietly. "We've talked about this before..."

Isabela leaned her face in closer, glancing down at Hawke's lips and then back into her eyes. "Then let's not talk," she sighed, moving closer still, "Let's just..."

Without a seconds hesitation she placed her lips against Lana's very gently, immediately tasting that sweetness that she had been obsessing over since she had first kissed the woman. Lana felt herself respond, caressing her tongue along the Rivaini's slowly, tenderly, feeling her willpower drain as it so often did with Isabela. Every time she drank she had a hard job fending off the busty rogue, and this time she had been too entranced by the Rivaini's eyes to resist. That familiar conflict raged in her head of good idea vs. bad idea as she inhaled deeply, drawing breath from Isabela. She always found it hard to stop once they had started. Isabela learnt this after the time they had spent sharing a cell a few years back, when Lana had rejected her, then gave in once more before rejecting her again. The Rivaini decided used it to her advantage as she pressed her lips against Lana's for the first time in three years, feeling herself hunger for more of the woman, more than Lana was willing to offer.

Suddenly someone cleared their throat. Lana and Isabela broke apart and looked up at a shocked Varric and Fenris who had returned with the pitchers of beer. Isabela wiped her moist lips, looking sheepish as Lana dropped her eyes, embarrassed, and got to her feet.

"Excuse me," she exhaled, avoiding their questioning stares and rushing to the water closet. She shut the door tight behind her and leaned her back against it, closing her eyes and trying to catch her breath. Maker's Breath! She had done it again. She had stupidly invited Isabela in after keeping her at bay for three years and could feel that infuriating urge to just tear off her clothes like she had done with the noblewoman earlier and claim her right in that moment. Isabela was torturing her. And she was doing it on purpose. Lana still couldn't get her out of her head. As much as she tried to tell herself the attraction was only physical, she knew there was much more to it than that. As if she could do anything about it anyway. Even if Isabela was willing for a relationship, she could hardly bring her home to her family and introduce her as her lover.

Isabela was still the only person that knew Hawke was only sexually interested in women. All of her other friends just assumed she was a free spirit like the pirate, having fun exploring the hidden secrets of the female form while returning to men every once in a while. She had kept her sexuality a secret for so long that it was just easier not to tell anyone. She saw no reason to when all she was looking for was a one night stand here and there, never having any interest in relationships. Isabela was the only person she had ever possessed actual feelings for and she wasn't even sure how deep they went. But she knew it was no use. The pirate had closed her heart and thrown it to the bottom of the ocean, never to be found. And Lana didn't want to waste her time swimming around looking for it.

Taking a deep breath, Lana finally opened her eyes and exited the water closet. She walked back to the table to find Varric sitting alone, sipping his pint. The others had gone, Isabela too. Lana seated herself down opposite the dwarf and grabbed her mug of ale.

"What's going on Hawke?" Varric asked after a few seconds, his face lined with concern.

Lana placed her mug back on the table and looked up. "What do you mean?"She asked, acting as though nothing had happened. Varric leaned across the table, folding his arms. He stared at Hawke seriously.

"Look," he began, "As your friend, I feel like I would be doing you a disservice if I didn't bring this up."

"Bring what up?" Lana asked, knowing full well what he wanted to talk about. Varric sighed.

"You and Isabela," he replied. Hawke said nothing as she stared at the dwarf, waiting for him to continue. "She's a great girl, Hawke, and I know you two joke around and flirt a lot, winding each other up and playing games...But I think you're likely to get hurt in the end...By which I mean stabbed and let for dead."

Lana exhaled. "I know," she answered sadly, staring down into her mug.

"Then why?" Varric asked, not understanding.

"_She_ kissed me_,_" Lana said. "It was nothing."

"Hawke," Varric said sceptically, "I know the difference between a one way kiss and a two way...the first one usually involves someone pulling back and neither of you did. I also know the difference between a meaningless kiss and a meaningful one...and what I just saw looked to be much more than a simple joking tease between you two."

Lana took another sip of ale. "I know you mean well, Varric," she began softly, "And I know what it looked like...but it just appeared that way. There's nothing going on between me and Isabela. We flirt...but that's it. There will never be anything more between us."

"Are you sure?" the dwarf asked. Lana met his eyes. "Look, I'm only watching out for you, Hawke. I know you can take care of yourself but you and Isabela are very passionate when it comes to winning these games...it just seems like there is a lot of room for disaster here."

Hawke said nothing. She knew he was right. She smiled up at him.

"Thanks Varric, but you don't need to worry. I'll be fine."

The dwarf raised his eyebrows. "Don't you even want to know where Isabela went?" he asked.

"...Alright, where?" Hawke asked, acting as though she didn't care.

Varric sighed, his face reluctant to say. "She went upstairs to her room with a woman who came in when you were gone." He watched Hawke for her reaction. Lana didn't even flinch. She already knew Isabela was sleeping with other people. As was she.

"What's new?" she joked, ignoring the mixed feelings of disappointment and gratefulness. Varric chuckled, seemingly happy with her answer. Lana felt a little tug of jealousy inside her, though, which she neglected to mention.

"Alright Hawke, have it your way...Just be careful."

* * *

"Darling, I have great news!"

Hawke broke off her dirty conversation with Isabela at once, as her mother approached her in the Hightown market district. Isabela rolled her eyes as the newly reinstated noblewoman rushed up to her daughter and kissed her on both cheeks in greeting. Maker, she hated her! Leandra reminded her too much of her own mother back in Rivain. It would have been hilarious if Leandra had overhead the conversation she and Lana were in the middle of having. The phrase "Would you kiss your mother with that mouth?" entered the pirates mind as she saw Lana plant a kiss on either of her mother's cheeks. The pirate tried not to laugh and hovered beside Hawke, eavesdropping.

"What is it Mother?" Hawke asked, seeing the numerous shopping bags in Leandra's arms.

"We're having a dinner party tomorrow," she said excitedly, "I've invited all the nobles in Kirkwall. Maker, it will be great to see everyone again! It's been too long."

Lana's heart almost stopped. "A..a... dinner party?" she stuttered. Isabela began to snigger silently beside her. She could tell Lana was on the verge of having an aneurism.

"Yes, dear!" her mother continued. "I sent the invites out weeks ago and organised minstrels to come and play for us. Aveline will be there two. There will be dancing, decorations, the whole works! I'm surprised no one has mentioned it to you yet."

"I don't hang around in Hightown much, Mother," Lana reminded her.

"I suppose you don't" Leandra agreed, eyeing Hawke's tight breeches and jacket with dislike. She hated that Hawke spent most of her time in The Hanged Man. "I got you a new dress for the occasion. We must have you looking your best."

"Indeed," Isabela interrupted putting on her politest voice. She tried hard not to laugh. Of all the years she's known her, she had never seen Lana in a dress. There was just something about long skirts which got in the way of killing everything that crossed her path. "I'm sure your mother has a nice man lined up for you to meet."

Lana heard the mocking tone in Isabela's voice but she wasn't sure her mother did. The pirate was rather enjoying herself. Lana give her a 'shut up now' kind of look and prayed to the Maker that this wasn't true.

"I may have," Leandra said to her, acting coy, "There's been interest from many possible suitors in town."

Lana cringed. Oh Maker no!

"I can see why," Isabela said to Leandra with a smirk, looking Hawke up and down. It was hard for her to hide the longing in her eyes. Lana saw it linger there as she took in her appearance. She hoped her mother didn't. "You have a very beautiful daughter, Leandra."

Lana chuckled. She couldn't help it. Beautiful was definitely not the word Isabela would use to describe her in other company. It was much too polite for her foul mouth. She knew he Rivaini was doing it to wind her up though. Leandra continued talking, noticing nothing unusual. After all, she had never spent much time with Isabela. The only thing she could ever disapprove of was the fact that the woman never wore any pants.

"Thank you, Isabela," Leandra said, chuckling, "Of course I knew that already."

"Yeah, _thanks Isabela," _Hawke said sarcastically, nudging the pirate in the ribs discreetly. She heard her gasp a little as Hawke's elbow made contact with her. "I can handle my own affairs, Mother," Lana continued, feeling herself panic. Leandra reached out and patted her cheek affectionately.

"Oh, I know you can, darling. I'm just being a mother. Just meet with the lad tomorrow and see where things go. He's quite handsome."

Lana wore a reluctant expression. Her worst possible nightmare had just come true: formal dancing and a date with a man. Isabela sniggered at the sight of her, still massaging her ribs. Leandra could have found her the most handsome man in the world and it wouldn't have made her daughter feel any better about this. Unless the man actually had lady parts Hawke was never going to be interested. Leandra chuckled and kissed her daughter, bidding the two women goodbye and returning to the market stalls to buy more delicacies for the party.

"Can you believe this?" Lana asked Isabela ask they walked through the streets together and were safely out of earshot. The pirate laughed freely now.

"Don't worry about it. It won't be that bad," she said, "It's not like she's asking you to sleep with him or anything."

"It's worse!" Lana exclaimed, "She's expecting me to marry him!"

The Rivaini doubled over with laughter. The outrage on Lana's face was priceless. This party tomorrow would definitely be an entertaining watch. She had noticed that Leandra didn't think to invite her though. _Bitch!_ Isabela glanced over at Lana as they walked through Hightown together. There was genuine apprehension on the woman's face as she thought of the pending party tomorrow and the start of a possible betrothal. There would no doubt be pretty noblewomen there who 'strayed' occasionally, serving as further punishment to Hawke who wouldn't be allowed to work her charms on them. Instead she'd be forced to talk all night with a young man who would never, ever have a chance with her even if he was the nicest, richest, most handsome, caring man in all of Thedas.

Isabela smiled and wrapped her arm around Lana's waist then. She just had a sudden urge to hold her. Hawke stopped outside her Estate and turned to the Rivaini, a pleading look on her face. Isabela caressed her sides a few times, comfortingly, smiling at her.

"Stop worrying!" the pirate implored, "You'll be fine, Hawke. I'm sure he'll be nice enough...and if he's not, he'll be dealing with Isabela."

Lana chuckled. She didn't doubt the pirate's declaration of protection. Isabela reached up a tucked a piece of Lana's brown hair behind her ear. Her hand slid along her cheek then and trickled off her chin. The pirate let out a sigh of contentment, feeling Lana's arms slip around her as well. They stared at her other, each smirking slyly at the other. Isabela leaned in to kiss her then. Lana felt herself instinctively do the same. Their lips brush together for a second, slightly parted, just about to get passionate when:

"Isabela!"

Isabela pulled back and both she and Hawke turned to see who had shouted. There was a woman standing a little ways away, smiling and waving at the pirate. She made her way over, strutting in her high shoes and fancy, low-cut dress.

"Lady Elegant," Isabela called, a huge grin on her face. Elegant held out her hands in a look-at-me kind of gesture as she approached. She didn't seem to care about the scene she had just interrupted.

"Nice to see you again," she said, "And you Hawke."

Lana forced a pleasant smile on her face. Maker she couldn't stand Elegant.

"Still up to old tricks, Bela?" Elegant asked, turning back to the pirate. Her eyes checked out Isabela's assets and she flicked her blond hair back, flirtingly. Lana felt like punching her.

"Let's go somewhere and I'll show you," Isabela said alluringly. She dropped her hand from Hawke's waist and took Elegant's hand, wedding ring and all, leading her away at once. Lana stared after her in disbelief.

"See you, Hawke!" Isabela called over her shoulder, waving her hand absentmindedly. Lana watched them run off together, furious that the Rivaini could just turn her feeling on and off like that. A surge of jealousy shot through her as she thought of Elegant. Isabela had played her once again and Lana had taken it like the fool that she was. Fuming, she whacked the wall of the Estate with her hand and pulled open the door roughly, walking inside.


	15. Chapter 15

"You've settled in nicely," Aveline said, taking a look around as she entered the living area.

Hawke was leaning over the balcony of the Estate, lost in thought about Isabela. She didn't even hear the door knock. Last night the pirate had basically tossed her to the side when a better offer came along (if you could call Elegant a better offer). Lana cursed her stupidity for the millionth time. Keeping Isabela at arm's length to protect herself had definitely backfired on her. She had done it to keep from getting hurt, knowing Isabela was a flight risk and knowing she was going to do what she wanted no matter what. How was it then that Isabela was still able to wound her, when she had done her best to keep them apart? Hawke was furious. She shook her head, bringing herself back to her senses and began to make her way down to the Guard Captain below.

"I think I deserve it after all the crap I've went through to get here," Lana joked, descending the stairs, putting Isabela to the back of her mind.

"Indeed," Aveline answered, "Still more coin never hurts, right? Say, if someone wanted to pass some work your way..."

Hawke sighed, "What do you need Aveline?" she asked, "I'm quite busy at the moment...Not to mention this damn dinner party tonight." She walked over to the new mail which Bodhan had left for her, pocketing the numerous coins people had paid her for her help.

"Yes, Leandra invited me. I promised her I would come," Aveline said stiffly. It appeared the Guard Captain was about as fond of these things as Lana was. "Any way, use that tone on him which you've just used on me and get him out of my hair."

Lana turned back to her, giving her a weird look. "What are you talking about?" she asked, confused.

"Remember Emeric, the Templar?" Aveline saw a muscle in Hawke's jaw tense at the 'T' word. Ever since she had killed that young recruit all those years ago when Bethany was taken, Lana had been in the Templars pocket, doing their dirty work, rounding up rogue mages in Kirkwall.

"Yes, I remember him," she said. Emeric seemed like a good man, for a Templar. But Lana still hated them all with a passion. "Why?"

"He wants your help, and some sort of official sanction."

"Official sanction?" Hawke repeated. "For what?"

"For his 'investigation'. Do you remember those murders and disappearances a while back? Ninette and the other women? Well, this Templar is convinced they're all connected...and he won't be quiet."

"So you're asking me to what? Silence the old bugger? You don't think it's worth investigating?" Lana asked, surprised. It wasn't like Aveline to pass up work. Was this not what the guard was put in place for?

"I have," Aveline replied, "He even convinced one of my Lieutenants to raid the Du Puis mansion. There was nothing there of course. You wouldn't believe how much ass I had to kiss after that. The old sod should just spend his declining years building a boat or something, not trying to play investigator."

"What can I do that you can't though?" Lana asked. She was reluctant to do the Guard's dirty work. Doing the Templar's was bad enough. "Don't you think this is a job for some of your men? I'm not in the habit of catching criminals...seeing as I basically am one myself."

"Well, maybe just showing up will calm him down," Aveline said. Lana could tell she felt pestered by the man.

"Is it not possible he has some useful information?" Lana asked. "He could be right about the murders. It should be easy to prove if there are bodies."

"Kirkwall isn't the safest place," Aveline said, sighing, "But that doesn't mean that ever damn murder in the last few years is connected. Just go and see him will you? If it leads somewhere real I'll take it off your plate."

Hawke rolled her eyes. "Alright," she relented, "You'll owe me for this though...and owe me more than my usual price of a pint."

"Anything to shut him up," she said irritated. "Any way... The plans for tonight? I assume its full dress."

Lana chuckled, "Could you imagine my mother organising it any other way?"

"Excited?" Aveline asked, smirking.

"Nauseous," Lana answered. The Guard Captain chuckled.

"I hear Leandra has organised a match for you as well," she said. Lana felt even more nauseous now.

"Thanks for the reminder," she groaned, "My mother must be out of her mind if she thinks I'm going to play the lady all night."

"Give it a chance, Hawke," Aveline admonished, "You haven't even met the man yet."

Lana said nothing. It didn't matter whether she had met him yet or not. It wasn't going to magic her into liking men as soon as she set eyes on him. And there would be so many beautiful women there to! _Curses! _Of all the days when she needed a quick stress relief to take her mind off Isabela and her mother had arranged a date with a man instead. It was almost cruel. Of course Aveline didn't know that. And neither did her mother.

"What about you and Donnic?" Lana asked then, eager to take the focus off herself. "Is he coming?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact we're...going together," Aveline said, blushing slightly. Hawke wolf whistled, a smirk appearing on her face.

"Woo, has Aveline Vallen finally found her knight in shining armor?" she teased, grinning.

"Oh shut up," Aveline replied, blushing further.

"Is he going to establish his canon and Grey your Warden?"

"I said shut it, Hawke!" Aveline said, getting angry. By The Maker, Hawke was getting as bad as Isabela!

"Just don't talk to him about 'blades for every purpose' again," Lana joked, sniggering. Aveline gave her a stony look, her fists clenched. "I'm kidding," she added for fear of being hit, holding up her hands in surrender. Makers Breath, Aveline really couldn't take a joke!

"Anyway enough about me...what's going on with you and Isabela?" the guardswoman asked sourly. "Merrill told me you both kissed in The Hanged Man a few nights back. Tell me that's not true Hawke."

The smile slipped off Lana's face at once. She turned away and sighed. "Nothing's going on, Aveline," she lied, flicking through her letters once more. The Guardswoman moved closer to her. She could see how flustered Lana was becoming.

"But you want it to..." It wasn't a question. It was a statement. Hawke cursed herself for being so transparent. She shook her head.

"No, I don't want...I mean, I..." Lana's words faltered. She wasn't sure exactly what she wanted anymore. Sure, Isabela was constantly on her mind. Anytime she slept with another woman the pirate popped into her head. But she was furious with the Rivaini about how she had treated her last night. Lana knew she deserved better than that.

"Hawke!" Aveline cautioned, giving her a stern look, "Tell me you took my advice and stayed away from that slattern!"

Lana couldn't deal with the thoughts going around her head. Why was everyone pestering her about this? Why was she pestering herself? It was clear Isabela didn't give a damn about her. There was nothing real between them. Their flirting had just simply got a bit out of hand. The conclusion stuck uncomfortably in her throat.

"Look it's none of your business, Aveline," she snapped. She hated when the Guardswoman told her off like a child. She hadn't forgotten what Aveline had said all those years ago. Not that it mattered. As soon as Isabela gave her that look, as soon as her amber eyes pierced Lana's, her breath caught and all common sense went out the window. It was pathetic how much of a hold the Rivaini had over her now.

"Fine," Aveline said, shrugging, "It's your funeral...I'll see you later then."

The Guardswoman turned on her heel and left the Hawke Estate.

* * *

Lana returned home that afternoon, covered in blood and wanted nothing more than a relaxing hot bath and to curl up in bed. The Estate was completely transformed when she arrived, flowers adorning the walls and banisters, a long table going the length of the living area, already equipped with silverware, the bards setting up their instruments in the corner. Bodhan and Sandal were dressed very smartly for the occasion and were busy making final preparations. Lana groaned and swiped a goblet of wine, before making her way upstairs to the water closet. She could certainly see this party far enough. It had been a very long day.

"Darling, you're home," Leandra greeted her at the top of the stairs, "Are you alright?"

"Yes Mother, it's not my blood. I'm fine," Lana answered tiredly. "You look nice." Her mother was already in a full length burgundy ballroom gown, her hair pinned up and a large necklace hanging down her chest. She looked like a woman reborn. Lana had never seen her ever look more formal. She imagined her mother had worn clothes like this before she had met her father, Malcolm. Leandra had given up so much for him.

"Thank you," her mother answered, "I've run you a bath dear, and your dress and shoes are in your bedroom. Be quick, darling. The first guests will be arriving within the hour... And give me that! You can't be drunk before you meet your date!...Or after, Lana!"

To Lana's dismay her mother reached out and took the goblet of wine from her as she tried to take a sip. She groaned.

"Yes Mother."

Stifling a yawn, she closed the door to the water closet behind her as Leandra went to help Bodhan prepare.

Inside, the tub was full of steaming hot water, beckoning Lana's tired, aching muscles. She stripped off her clothes and dipped her toes in carefully, before sliding her long legs into the bottom and easing her body in. As soon as she leaned her back against the tub, she exhaled and closed her eyes. Her mind involuntarily flashed through the numerous dead bodies she had seen today, some killed by her hand, some dead of their own accord. It wasn't exactly the kind of thing you got used to. Over the years it became easier to deal with, but sometimes the faces of the men and women she had killed still haunted her conscience.

After several minutes, the front door knocked downstairs. Lana heard Gamlen and Leandra welcoming in loud voices and realised that the party guests had begun to arrive. Soft music began to drift up from the dinning area as the bards began to play. Reluctantly Hawke lifted herself out of the tub, throwing a towel around her nakedness and picking up her dirty clothes. She made her way through the second door of the water closet, which led straight to her quarters. Lana let the towel fall as soon as she was inside, not caring about the open window nearby. Her jaw dropped in horror as soon as she saw the dress her mother had bought for her hanging from her four-poster bed. It was a floor length, blood-red Antivan dress, made of thin, delicate fabric and complete with a beautifully decorated corset and low-cut front. Lana sighed in defeat and began to put it on.

As she styled her hair in the mirror and applied her mother's make-up, her thoughts fell on Bethany. She hadn't seen her little sister in years. She should have been here too, ready to mingle with the nobles of Kirkwall for the first time. Lana remembered how Bethany used to style her hair for her back in Lothering before she went out on dates. She smiled to herself. Bethany was always good at that sort of thing. Hawke was having trouble already and decided to just loop her hair into a bun, allowing her bangs to curl down the side of her face in shiny, black ringlets. She put on the jewellery her mother had purchased for her and let the thin necklace rest on her chest, the red ruby on the end settling between her cleavage. This whole dinner party would have appealed to Lana a lot more if her sister had of been here to endure it with her.

Leandra poked her head in then.

"Darling, are you ready?"She asked, "The guests are all here and dinner is about to begin."

"Coming, Mother," Lana replied, getting to her feet and straightening her dress out. Her mother stared at her, wide eyed. She gasped.

"You look beautiful, Lana!" she exclaimed, taking in her appearance. Lana felt as though she was someone else. A noblewoman? Well, there was a first for everything. She felt a little silly but knew that everyone else in the party would be wearing the same sort of thing. Leandra reached out and linked her arm around her daughter's and they both left the bedroom and began to descend the stairs together.

The entire Estate below was full of chattering nobles, who all looked up in awe at the beautiful woman Leandra was leading down the stairs. They had no doubt seen Lana running around Hightown in breeches, shirts and armor, normally covered in blood and hanging around with 'undesirable' types (not to mention whoring around). No one had any idea she scrubbed up this well. It was an understatement to say she was the most desirable woman in the room right now. All of the men stared at her in wonder, their mouths watering, as the women tried to conceal their looks of jealousy and stop themselves from turning green with envy.

Leandra sidestepped the other guests and marched Lana up to a handsome young gentleman who was waiting nervously by the fire with which Hawke assumed must be his parents. His brown hair was slicked back and he wore a fine suit which was also of Antivan make. His jaw dropped as he saw Lana approach, unable to believe his luck. Lana felt nauseous once again as the man's eyes poured over her curves, drinking in every bit of magnificence the woman had to offer. Oh, why couldn't she have gotten the balls to tell her mother she liked women and saved herself from this eventual betrothal? _Nice going, Lana, you'll never see a naked woman again._

"Darling, this is Emil Reinhardt," Leandra said, giving her daughter a little nudge forwards. Emil reached out a hand and took Lana's. He bowed his head and brushed his full lips against her knuckles, his eyes never leaving hers.

"Serah Hawke," he said in his deep voice, before straightening up again. Lana shivered. What was supposed to do?

"A pleasure," she answered, trying to speak over the lump in her throat. She forced a reluctant smile on her face. Emil smiled back.

"The pleasure is mine," he answered, "Can I get you a goblet of wine?"

"Please," Hawke said gratefully. She was in desperate need of it. Maybe if she got drunk enough it wouldn't be that bad. Leandra introduced her to a couple more guests as Emil walked off to find Bodhan, who was holding a tray of drinks, handing them out to the nobles of Kirkwall. Lana spotted Aveline and Donnic standing in the corner, looking as though they felt they didn't belong. Seeing her chance to escape, Lana excused herself and walked over to them, relieved to see a few familiar faces.

"Maker's Breath!" Aveline exclaimed, taking in the newly, transformed Lana Hawke. The Guard Captain looked fantastic in her emerald-green dress but she was still nothing compared to Lana. Where Aveline's over-worked muscles made her look a little masculine, Hawke's were perfectly formed, showing her strength and fitness, yet still maintaining that feminine shape. And as for the breast department, let's just say Aveline wasn't as lucky as Hawke. Even the Guardswoman found herself glance down at the full chest of her friend and feel a pang of jealousy.

"I could say the same, Av!" Lana replied, scanning the woman's appearance. She turned to Aveline's date. "Guardsman Donnic."

Donnic shook her hand and nodded, "Nice to see you again, Serah Hawke. You look wonderful."

"And you," Lana replied, smiling. She turned back to Aveline. "I take it you already heard what happened today?"

"I'm sorry for putting you in danger, Hawke," Aveline said, "Emeric's death was a big blow."

"Does this mean you've taken up his investigation?"

Aveline hesitated, "We've...started looking into every possibility, not just Gascard Du Puis."

Lana made a face, "Come on Av! This man gave his life to find out who killed those women. The white lily's they received, all having very few social ties, all being women? And they all traced back to Du Puis. That can't be simple coincidence. He was hiding something, I'm telling you!"

Before the Guardswoman could retort, a loud bell rang, signalling everyone to take their seats. Lana made to sit beside Aveline but was beckoned to the opposite end of the table by her mother, who was standing with Emil. _Curses! _She sighed and bid her friend goodbye. Emil smiled at her as she approached and held out the chair for her to sit down. She thanked him and flattened her dress beneath her bottom, sitting herself down like a lady would. He placed himself beside her, much to close. She could smell his musky scent, making her nose wrinkle. His eyes twinkled as he handed her a goblet of red wine.

As soon as Lana looked around the table her jaw dropped. If this wasn't already her worst nightmare then it definitely was now. The noblewoman she had stripped naked a few days ago, had meaningless sex with, and then made her climb out of her bedroom window without any clothes on was sitting facing her, eyeing Emil with dislike and staring at Lana intensely.

"Andraste's Ass!" Lana whispered under her breath. What were the chances? She was shitting herself even more now. A cool sweat was breaking out under her dress as she fought against feigning ill and disappearing off to bed to get herself out of this sticky situation. This would definitely be the most awkward dinner of her life.

* * *

When everyone had finished eating, the numerous waiters cleared the table away and moved it to the side of the room, making space for the nobles to dance. Lana had been on edge the entire meal, afraid the noblewoman facing her would reveal they had slept together. It wasn't for lack of trying on her part though! Hawke had pounded three goblets of wine out of sheer stress and was now on her fourth. Leandra was in deep conversation with her old friends and didn't seem to notice the young woman licking her lips inappropriately across the table towards her daughter and reaching out unnecessarily to touch her hand every now and then. She kept sliding her bare foot up Lana's leg under the table, with Hawke continuously kicking her away as she tried to focus on her conversation with Emil. Maker it was hard enough to seem interested in a man without a woman trying to bed her at the same time right in the middle of the dinner! This was an absolute disaster.

As the older nobles danced around the room in pairs, the younger ones stood around the edges talking, drinking and laughing. Lana found herself listening to some boring story from Emil before someone collided with her, sending her wine slopping over the edge of her cup.

"Oh sorry, I'm so clumsy!"

It was that damn woman again, Lana noticed as she caught her from falling.

"Are you alright?" Hawke asked, not really caring, as she straightened her up. A mental image flashed through her mind of the woman lying naked on her bed, moaning with pleasure, her sweaty body tensing up under hers. The look of desire the woman was giving her told Lana she was thinking exactly the same thing. And that she was going out of her way to get it again. _My skills in bed are coming back to bite me in the ass!_ Lana thought to herself. The longing in the woman's eyes didn't go unnoticed by Emil.

"Do you two know each other?" he asked, glancing from her to Lana. The woman giggled and nodded.

"We had se-"

"-veral interests!" Lana interrupted quickly, "And her parents know my mother." (Apparently)

The woman smiled slyly up at Hawke. She could tell Lana was trying to keep them a secret. This was becoming a game for her. She was desperate to have sex with her again and that wouldn't happen with this man around. She had to sabotage them.

"How nice," Emile said uncertainly, looking at the woman curiously. She was still holding Lana around the waist and gazing up at her face with desire. Lana was ready to hit her. The woman was clearly a little drunk and was going to give away her secret. Lana cursed herself for ever sleeping with her. It hadn't even been worth it. She'd had better.

"It is," the noblewoman continued, running her hands up Hawke's bare arm. "Hawke is amazing at making people come-"

"-unicate!" Lana interrupted again, throwing the woman a look, trying to get her to shut up. "Communicate." The lady giggled as Hawke shook her head at her, her jaw tightening.

"Communicate?" Emil asked confused, "How so?"

"Well..." Lana began, her heart going a dinger. _Say something, Lana! Anything!_ "I...I like to introduce people and... make new acquaintances..." As Lana continued speaking she realised she sounded like a complete idiot. She wished there was another window nearby to throw the damn noblewoman out of again. The woman was beginning to run her hands through her hair. Lana swatted her away like a fly. "Let's dance!" she blurted to Emil, before he had time to register the bullshit she had just came out with. She hated dancing, and he _was _a man, but anything that would get her out of this conversation would do.

"Of course," he replied with a smile, taking her hand. The noblewoman watched her go sadly, longing to be the one who had their hand placed on Lana's lower back. Lana allowed Emil to guide her around the room. She could see her mother smiling at her, happy to see her matchmaking had worked out. Little did she know Lana was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. After several minutes twirling around the floor, Emil leaned down to kiss her. Hawke froze as he placed his mouth over hers. His lips were harsh, thicker than a woman's, and rougher. His tongue entered her mouth then, untrained, and a little too far for her liking. After a few uncomfortable seconds, Lana stopped and excused herself, dashing towards the staircase without looking back. As she tried to make her way up, her mother stole her and dragged her into the other room, closing the door behind them.

"Where are you going?" she asked, looking at her with concern. Lana's face was bright red.

"I...I...just need to get something," she stuttered. Leandra placed a hand on her arm.

"You don't need to be frightened, dear," she said, thinking Lana was just panicking over the kiss. Little did she know she was panicking over the fact that he was a _he. _"Emil is a nice man and he seems to really like you. They're a very eligible family."

"I know," Lana replied, feeling worse. _Any chance he's got a hot sister instead?_

"Good," Leandra said, smiling at her, "Now don't be long upstairs. It's not polite to keep him waiting."

"Ok."

"By the way, now that I've got you here I need to talk to you about something," Leandra said. Lana looked at her curiously.

"What about?" _Please don't tell me she's going to try and give me the 'bird and the bees' talk!_

Leandra hesitated, "I...I've been wondering if I should remarry..." she said. Lana's eyes widened.

"I assume you have someone in mind?" she asked. Her mother wouldn't just bring this up out of the blue.

Leandra smiled, "Maybe... I'm just thinking ahead though. How would you feel about that?"

Lana considered this. "Emm...yeah, if that's what you want...What about Father?"

Leandra looked sad then. "Your father's dead, Lana...I can't keep thinking about all that we have lost. Bethany, Carver...It's been driving me insane and I've been taking it out on you. I think it's time for me to move on."

Lana hugged her mother tightly then, "You have my blessing," she said softly. She could tell her mother was lonely. Leandra hugged her back and placed a kiss on her cheek.

"Thank you, darling," she whispered back. "All I have to do now is find you a nice husband and you can start making your own little family."

Lana cringed but still she said nothing. She had never wanted children (or a husband) but now was not the time for that discussion (it never was). She released her mother and they both re-entered the party. Lana raced upstairs as fast as she could before either Emil or the noblewoman could find her again. Maker, she felt like the subject of a slightly perverted, game of tug of war! She entered her bedroom and closed the door tight, lying against it and sliding to the floor, exhaling and closing her eyes. Maker's Breath! What a party!

"Rough night?"

Lana's eyes sprung open and she looked towards the window in shock. There, sitting on the ledge, looking as comfortable as ever, was Isabela. She was grinning at Lana, swinging her leg playfully, her arms crossed under her massive chest. At the sight of her, Hawke felt her heart lighten. Then she remembered last night and she riled up with anger.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded coldly, getting to her feet. "I don't remember sending you an invite."

Isabela's breath caught as the full effect of Hawke's appearance hit her. It wouldn't have taken Lana to be insecure about her body, considering that her every curve was on show and her chest was peeking out over the top of her dress in a classy, yet sexy kind of way. There was a thin layer of sweat, shining along her breasts. The woman was obviously flustered. Isabela felt her self become aroused as her eyes lingered on Hawke's perfectly formed ass as she bent over, ruffling through the drawer of her bedside table. _Maker, she's unbelievable! _The pirate got to her feet and approached her, resisting the urge to pin the woman down on the nearby bed and have her way with her right in that moment.

"What's the matter?" she asked instead, confused as to why Lana sounded angry.

"Nothing," Lana lied bluntly. She finally found what she was looking for, withdrawing tobacco and placing it in a pipe. Isabela chuckled. Lana was the only woman she knew who smoked a pipe (apart from herself). There was something about both of them always choosing to shy away from social stereotypes. It was part of the reason why Isabela liked Hawke so much. They were similar in that way.

"Stressed?" she asked. Hawke glared at her before walking to the window and leaning over the ledge, lighting the pipe. The pirate could smell a flowery scent waft off her as she passed. She walked over beside her and they stood side by side, a cool breeze coming through the window. Isabela glanced at her out of the corner of the eye, seeing the woman taking a much-needed puff.

"How's the dinner party?" she asked, smirking.

"Disaster," Lana said, blowing out the smoke with a satisfied sigh, "That bloody noblewoman I slept with is out to get me! She's been pestering me the entire night...and Emil, my 'suitor', just kissed me in front of everyone. I almost threw up in his mouth. It was all I could do to get away."

Isabela chuckled, "I don't blame either of them," she said flirtingly, her eyes scanning Lana's body once more. _Oh Maker! _"You should wear that dress more often, Hawke. It's making me quiver just looking at you." The pirate moved behind Lana then, slipping her arms around her waist, feeling her body heat from underneath the tight corset. The Rivaini felt herself become wet. _Andraste's Ass, I want you under me! _She thought longingly. Lana closed her eyes, trying not to give in to Isabela's touch anymore. Last night she had learnt her lesson well. She remained still, smoking the last of her pipe before setting it on the windowsill, giving the woman the cold shoulder.

"Why are you here?" she asked, feeling Isabela hover over her, her breath trickling along her neck.

"Bodhan wouldn't let me in," she said gently in her ear. "He questioned me...but I'm afraid what I had to say was for your ears only. So I climbed in the infamous bedroom window."

"Really?" Hawke asked, feigning interest. She tried to ignore the Rivaini's breasts pressed against her back, the hands which rested along her abdomen. "And what could be so important for you to call to my estate at this time of night?"

Isabela's grin grew wider. "Wouldn't you like to know?" she asked teasingly, spinning Lana around to face her. "So this is where you live?" she continued, looking around with distaste. She turned back to Lana, shaking her head. "This is _so_ not you."

"And you would know?" Lana asked bitterly. Isabela ran her hand through Hawke's dark brown hair which had fallen in front of her face. She tucked it neatly behind her ear. Hawke felt her self shiver at Isabela's touch. The pirate's gaze locked with hers, and she once again became mesmerised by her amber eyes. It was as though Isabela knew the effect they had on her. After several seconds Isabela leaned in slowly to kiss her. Lana flinched. The Rivaini frowned.

"What's with you?" she asked, confused with Lana's actions. Normally she would have played along with her, especially on her own territory. It was the first time Hawke had ever backed away completely, without even putting up some sort of competition. Lana's jaw tightened. She shook her head, staring at Isabela.

"I'm going back to the party," she said coldly, "Show yourself out."

Without another look at the pirate she eased past her and made her way quickly towards the door.

"Oooh..." Isabela exclaimed, walking after her, "You're such a tease!"

"I'm not playing tonight, Bela," Lana called without looking back. She could hear Isabela follow behind her. Just as Hawke reached the door and opened it, Isabela reached out a hand and slammed it shut before she could leave. She touched Lana's waist again, holding her from walking any further. Lana turned to her, her face impassive. Isabela could tell she wasn't herself. She was hiding it well though.

"What? Did the Blooming Rose not have what you were looking for tonight?" Lana asked angrily, no hint of a smile as she joked. Isabela chuckled, her hands still resting on Hawke's waist.

"It hasn't for a while," she replied, caressing her side, "My attention has been drawn...elsewhere..." Her eyes scanned Hawke's assets pointedly. Maker, how she wanted to press herself up against them! Run her hands along them as she had done all those years ago!

"Ah, yes...elsewhere," Hawke replied, pretending to think of where else that might be, "Did you have fun with Elegant last night then?"

Isabela gave her a look, "Jealous, Hawke? I never thought you'd be the type. You know I would have preferred to have you instead."

Hawke's breath caught. She knew she shouldn't have felt a flutter of happiness at Isabela's words but she did. _Maker's Breath, this is so not like me, _she thought to herself. She was never one to get jealous but a part of her was, no matter how much she wanted to bury that part.

"Is that so?" Hawke asked, her eyes narrowing.

"You already know that," Isabela said firmly, with a smirk, "Or was my kiss last night too subtle for you?"

Hawke groaned in frustration. The pirate couldn't have everything she wanted. "Just leave me alone, Bela!" She pushed Isabela away from her forcefully and re opened the door, rushing to the stairs as fast as she could. Isabela frowned, feeling a little angry herself now. She continued after her and grabbed her arm tightly before she could descend.

"Hawke!"

A few of the nobles below looked up, hearing the pirate shout. They recognised Isabela and Hawke from their behaviour at the market a few days ago no doubt. Lana spun to look at her, her expression furious. Isabela's constant persistence wasn't fair on her and they both knew it. But since when did the pirate care about anyone other than herself?

"What do you want from me?" Hawke demanded through gritted teeth, trying to keep her voice low. The party was still going on below. Her suitor was walking around looking for her and so was the noblewoman she had slept with. And now Isabela was here. She was cracking under the strain of it all. "You're messing with my head, Bela!"

Isabela was a little taken aback. She could see the hurt in Lana's eyes. Maker, what was up with her today? "I think you know what I want..." the Rivaini replied, staring at Hawke's lips, swallowing hard. "I've told you on more than one occasion, Hawke."

"This isn't fair," Lana cried, feeling her resolve crumble once more. The pirate smirked.

"I know," she replied, getting closer again. "But I don't play fair."

Lana brought a hand to her head, stressed out to the max. She couldn't do this anymore. Isabela took her face in her hands then, about to kiss her once again. Lana stared into her eyes, feeling lost as she so often did. Coming to her senses, she backed away again before Isabela's lips met hers.

"Just stop it, Bela!" she pled, pushing the Rivaini away again.

She ran down the stairs as fast as she could. The nobles nearby watched her as she past, trying to get herself as far away from Isabela as possible. The woman was a torture. As she stormed through the crowd, the annoying noblewoman she had slept with reached out and grabbed her arm, trying to plant her lips on her.

"There you are, Hawke!" she said, breathing in her ear, "I've missed you...missed that tongue of yours..."

"Get off me!" Lana yelled, pulling out of the woman's grip. She didn't even wait for a reply before waling away. As soon as she turned though, she ran headlong into Emil. _Andraste's Ass, give me a break!_

"There you are!" he said, relieved, "I've been looking everywhere for you. Would you like to dance again?"

Lana grabbed a goblet of wine from a passing tray and downed it in one, feeling like she was about to have a nervous breakdown. She was so flushed.

"Fine," she said forcefully, placing the empty goblet back as the bewildered waiter looked on. Realising this wasn't the proper way to answer she added, "I mean, yes I would love to."

Emil smiled and took her hand, leading her out onto the dance floor and joining the others.

* * *

On the balcony above, Isabela leaned over the banister and observed the party below. She watched Lana be led around the room by the young nobleman. _He must be the suitor_, she thought to herself, _Lucky Bastard! _She saw how uncomfortable Lana looked with him and knew she was only going through with the whole charade to please her mother. Isabela hated Leandra even more now. She wanted Lana for herself, desired her so much it was starting to hurt. The Rivaini watched after her with longing, wanting to be the one holding her like that. _Maker, Hawke can really work that dress!_ She didn't even notice how many eyes were on her right now. Suddenly Isabela couldn't take it anymore. She wanted a straight answer from Hawke once and for all. This had gone on for too long and the pirate couldn't stand seeing her in another's arms, even if those arms were male. She pushed off the balcony ledge and descended the stairs.

Hawke felt her head go dizzy as the young Emil, led her through the dance, his hand dropping further on her lower back, lingering along the top of her ass. Her mind was still obsessing over Isabela's sudden appearance in her bedroom. Why did Isabela keep coming back for her? She had proved last night that all she wanted was a quick screw...and Lana wasn't going to give it to her. But for some reason the pirate kept trying. Maybe she was just attracted to what she knew she couldn't have. Or maybe she just loved seeing Lana flustered. As Emil held her out and spun her around another hand caught her.

"Sorry," Isabela said, turning to Emil, "Mind if I cut in?"

The pirate didn't wait for and answer before whisking Lana away from the man and continuing the dance. Lana saw the confusion on his face.

"Andraste's Ass, Bela! What do you think you're doing?" she demanded, reluctantly allowing the Rivaini to place her arm around her waist and hold her hand tightly as she lead her around the room to the music with the others.

"Don't tell me you were enjoying that," Isabela said with a smirk. Lana glared at her as she spun her around.

"People are watching us," she hissed. Aveline was giving her a look of warning while Emil and the noblewoman were pining after her. "Why are you doing this to me?"

Isabela stared into her eyes. She pulled her closer, pressing her body against Lana's as she danced, their hips moving together. "I want you, Hawke...right now. I can't wait any longer."

Lana swallowed hard. "No," she said simply.

"Why?" Isabela demanded, "And don't tell me you're not attracted to me. We both know you'd be lying."

"I'm here with Emil," she answered, avoiding the truth.

"Emil?" Isabela repeated, smirking, "But you know he's got a dic-"

"I'm perfectly familiar with male genitalia, Bela!" Lana interrupted. Isabela chuckled. Lana still didn't crack a smile. The Rivaini stopped laughing then and became serious once more.

"Look, I need you to tell me the truth," she continued, "I'm not the type of person who goes running after people."

"So why are you?" Lana asked, "You know my answer already."

"I know the answer you want to believe, Hawke!" Isabela countered, "But I can tell you're lying to yourself...every time you kiss me."

Lana stopped dancing then and removed her hand from the Rivaini's. This wasn't a good place to have this conversation. There were listening ears all around. She shook her head at Isabela and walked through the Estate, entering the room at the side of the hall where she had spoken with her mother earlier. Isabela followed her and closed the door tightly behind them, blocking out the music from the main hall where the other guests were having a good time.

Lana leaned her arms on the table under the window, unable to say what was on her mind. This whole situation was screwed up. She was cracking under the pressure. Isabela pressed her self up against her from behind once more. Lana moaned at her touch. It was driving her insane.

"Hawke..." Isabela said gently, feeling the woman breathe heavily, "Talk to me."

"Why should I?" Lana whispered, her voice full of stress, "What difference will it make?"

Isabela leaned in and placed a kiss on her neck then. Lana swallowed hard, closing her eyes. She fought desperately against every feeling in her body which desired the woman.

"Stop it, Bela," she pleaded. Isabela leaned in to kiss her again then, lingering longer. This time Lana shook her head and walked away from her once more. "I said stop!" she said more firmly now. Isabela sighed in frustration.

"I don't get it, Hawke," she said, staring at her back. Lana still hadn't looked at her. "You tell me to stop but you mean for me to continue...I'm tired of these mixed signals you're giving me. Which is it?"

"Both..." Lana replied hoarsely, realising how stupid that sounded.

"What?" Isabela asked, confused. Lana finally turned to look at her. "It can't be both...Tell me the truth!"

"I can't," she replied.

"_Why?" _Isabela asked desperately, walking towards her again. _Why is torturing me like this? I can't stand it anymore. _

She saw that familiar look in Lana's eyes, the desire, the hunger, the need to be close to her...and then that other something which Isabela could never put her finger on. Lana let out a sigh. Isabela didn't wait for a response. She leaned forwards and kissed her deeply, unable to control herself. She pressed Lana back, up against the bookshelf roughly, running her hands along her breasts and down along her curves, feeling the woman respond eagerly to her touch. Both women moaned with impatience, kissing passionately, breathing harshly as their chests pressed together, heaving with desire and longing. This was the only thing that made sense to both of them, the only thing they didn't have to put into words.

Suddenly there was a sound of glass breaking.

"What in Andraste's name is going on!?"

Lana broke off the kiss immediately. Her mother was standing in the doorway, the goblet of wine having fallen from her hand, shocked to her core at the scene she had just walked in on. The other guests were looking over her shoulder, wondering what all the commotion was. They stared at Isabela pressed up against Lana, her hands holding her inappropriately.

"Mother..." Lana breathed, "It's not what-"

"Get out!" Leandra screamed at Isabela, "Get out of my house, you pirate whore!"

"This is Hawke's house, not yours!" Isabela replied bitterly. Maker, she _hated _her! Leandra looked like she was about to kill her then. _Oh balls! _Isabela didn't need telling twice. She rushed away, realising the amount of damage she had caused for Hawke. Lana called after her as she pushed through the party guests and walked towards the exit, not caring who was watching.

"Bela wait!" she shouted desperately, running to the ballroom. She could feel the eyes of the nobles on her, Aveline looking at her in disappointment. The music had stopped and everyone watched in silence as Leandra grabbed a hold of daughter. Lana shook out of her mothers grip and pushed past the guests, following the Rivaini out of the Estate and into the night.

The cold air assaulted her lungs as she raced after the pirate.

"Bela stop, please!" she yelled, running as fast as her shoes would allow. Isabela sighed as she heard Hawke's heels on the pavement behind her. She stopped walking then. She wished she hadn't of came after her. The Rivaini turned back.

"I'm sorry," she said, knowing she had just embarrassed Hawke in front of everyone. Not to mention revealed her long kept secret to her mother. It wasn't her intention. Lana shook her head.

"Don't be," she said, smiling slightly, "I've been a coward for too long. It was bound to come out eventually."

Isabela smiled back at her. Hawke couldn't stay angry for long. It wasn't in her nature.

"At least you don't have to worry about icky man sex tonight," the pirate joked. They both laughed.

"Believe me, Emil's tongue wouldn't have been fit for the job either," Lana replied, chuckling.

Isabela reached out to stroke her face. "Tell me the truth, Hawke," she pleaded, "Do you want me or not? I can't wait around for ever."

Lana placed her hand over Bela's on her face. "Yes..." she breathed. Isabela stared deeply into her eyes, her face inches away from Lana's.

"Then why are you running scared?" she whispered, edging closer. "Why can't we just have one passionate, exciting night together?" She could see the tears build in Lana's eyes. She had never seen her cry before. The pirate leaned in to kiss her then. Lana closed her eyes, feeling her soft lips graze against her own just for a second, knowing that what she was about to do would change everything. A single tear fell down her face. "Tell me," Isabela said softly, brushing the tear away with her thumb. Lana pulled back and looked into the Rivaini's searching stare. The game was up. She sighed in defeat.

"Because I'm falling in love with you, Isabela..."


	16. Chapter 16

Isabela's breath caught as she gazed at Hawke, her hand still on the woman's cheek. _She's falling in love with me? _The Rivaini had only ever had a declaration of love once before and she had run for it, for fear of hurting him. That was a long time ago. This time there was nowhere to run...and she sorely wished there was. She liked Hawke a lot. She had never met anyone like her before and she enjoyed her company. _But love?...It always comes back to bite me in the ass, _Isabela thought to herself_. _Things were going to change now. _Maker, why did I have to push her this far? We were fine the way we were. _The Rivaini realised by the look on Lana's face that she had been reluctant to tell her this all along. But, as usual, Isabela didn't know when to quit, and she had forced her into revealing not only one secret today, but two.

Finally Isabela understood. She could see in Lana's eyes the pain she was causing by persisting to flirt with her even after she had said no. She had wounded her a little without even realising. _Oh Balls! Elegant! _Isabela remembered, cursing to herself as she recalled how she had left Hawke for her last night, after they had kissed. _That was why she was angry with me earlier. _Now that she could see it from Hawke's point of view, Isabela realised that her actions seemed more hurtful than she had intended.

The pirate shook her head then. She placed both her hands on the woman's cheeks, staring in to chocolate-brown eyes, wishing she could give her a different answer. She had to make her listen though. It was going to hurt her as much to say it, as it would hurt Hawke to hear it.

"Look, Hawke...I...I was in love once before...and it didn't work out," she said gently, gazing directly into her eyes, "Love is not for me... It's just _messy_...and I end up hurting people in the end." She ran her hand through Lana's hair soothingly, trying to fight against kissing her once more. _Maker, I want to kiss her! _It was just going to hurt the woman further when she eventually walked away from her though. And Hawke was her friend. She didn't want this to end badly. This couldn't go on any longer. The game was well and truly up now. It just wasn't fun anymore.

"Sometimes it's unavoidable though," Hawke countered. Isabela sighed in frustration and let go of her, pulling away from her touch. Lana wasn't getting her meaning. She walked to a wall a short distance away and sat on the edge of it, staring at the ground. This wasn't how things were supposed to pan out.

"I don't care!" Isabela replied bluntly, unable to withhold the frustration in her voice. "It can go pester someone else! I don't want it, and I never have!" The temperature around them became colder then, the warmth between them a few minutes before having been shattered by the pirate's harsh words. The look on Hawke's face told Isabela that she had hurt her again. _Damn it! _The pirate finally understood why Hawke had held her off all these years. She was causing her pain without even meaning to. She always would. It was the same old story over and over. The Rivaini hadn't intended for her words to be so brutal just now, but she couldn't spell it out any other way. Andraste's Ass, she was a pirate, not a lady of the court. Eloquence wasn't one of her strong suits.

"It isn't always up to you, you know..." Hawke said, frowning, hurt by the cold unforgiving tone the pirate had used with her. She shook her head at Isabela's stubborn expression, cursing herself for coming clean. _Nice job, Genius, you confessed feelings for a heartless pirate who had been stringing you along from the start...And the worst part was that you knew from the beginning. _Hawke exhaled, smiling bitterly to herself. Of all the people for her to have feelings for. And this woman couldn't even look at her for it now. She shook her head in disbelief at Isabela, who was still staring at the ground and then turned, walking back home. _I didn't want this either!_

Isabela looked up at her regretfully, about to apologise for how cold she had just been. She suddenly realised Lana was walking away. _Shit! No! Not like this you're not!_

"Hawke!" she called, pushing off the wall and running after her. Her voice echoed in the night, cutting through the deafening silence. They were the only ones in the dark street. Isabela stopped in front of the woman, impeding her footsteps and grabbed both her arms tightly. Lana's dark brown eyes were filling with tears. The pirate could see her struggle to fight them back. The woman never cried. Isabela knew she had pushed her to the limit today though, not to mention left her a massive mess to return home to. Everything was so screwed up and as usual it was her fault. "Hawke..." she began once more, caressing her cheek. "It's just..._easier_ this way. Look, I...I've never told anyone this but...I was married once before."

Hawke was shocked. "That's hard to imagine."

Isabela dropped her head, staring at the ground. She couldn't look into Lana's sad eyes anymore, knowing she was responsible for them. She took a deep breath.

"When I was freed I swore I would never be tied down again." Her jaw hardened in anger. "I was his _play thing_. After seeing me in the market in Llomerryn with my mother he just had to have me... That bitch sold me off for a goat and a handful of gold coins. She didn't even haggle over the price!"

Lana stared at her sympathetically. She had never heard Isabela mention her life back in Llomerryn before. The Rivaini never opened up to anyone, and Lana knew she was doing it now to try and make her rejection of her love less hurtful. But Hawke still felt her heart break. _Maker, what were you expecting to get from this? A declaration of love from Isabela? You knew what you were getting yourself into. _Lana cursed herself for opening her mouth. But the pirate had just kept pushing and pushing her. She eventually cracked under the strain. There was no way she could have dealt with another day like today. At least now she wouldn't have to. Maybe there was a silver lining here somewhere after all.

"When you were 'freed'?" Lana asked, curiously.

Isabela nodded. "The bastard took an assassin's blade to the back of the head. I thanked Zevran profusely afterwards...I took control of The Siren and left then." Hawke reached out and tucked her fingers under Isabela's chin, making her look at her once more. Silence fell between them as their faces hovered inches apart. There it was again. That exciting, moment of desire and longing between them that always happened when their eyes met. Only now the chemistry seemed tainted somehow. Neither wanted to pull away, but neither wanted to advance either. Hawke felt for the woman. But she still couldn't see what all this had to do with her.

"I'm sorry...but I don't understand, Isabela," she said sadly, "How is this anything like that?...You came to my door remember? You're the one who is chasing _me! _Why did you ask me to reveal how I felt if you were going to reject it?"

Isabela sighed. She realised Lana was right. She was usually always the one to initiate things between them. Lana just used to play along. It was a game back then though, and both of them knew it. Now it was...something else entirely. Isabela _was_ the one doing the chasing...but she didn't have an answer for Lana as to why. Not one that wouldn't hurt her anyway.

The pirate's face hardened then. She didn't like how vulnerable she felt right now. She felt like she was being scrutinised by Hawke. The Rivaini stared coldly into Lana's eyes as best she could, trying to distance herself from her once more. "Stop trying to confuse the issue, Hawke...You're not going to like what I have to say, so...I'm going to go."

She gave her one last look, wishing things could just have remained simple between them, before pulling the woman's hand away from her face and walking away. Lana felt so angry that after everything that had just transpired, the Rivaini still couldn't talk to her, even after making her come clean. It just wasn't bloody fair.

"You're not afraid of love, Isabela," Hawke called after her angrily. Isabela paused, listening. "...You're afraid of being loved...Thank you for making me look like a _complete_ idiot today! Thank you _so_ much for forcing me to say how I felt when we both knew you were going to act like this. I hope you have fun with Elegant! You both deserve each other!"

The pirate opened her mouth to reply and then closed it, knowing nothing she could say would make the situation any less painful for either of them. After several seconds, she looked regretfully over her shoulder to see Hawke walking back towards her Estate, shaking her head in fury. Isabela sighed. This was how it always was for her. She screwed up people's lives even when she didn't mean to..._I'm better off alone._ She then continued walking in the direction of Lowtown, leaving Hawke to pick up the pieces of all the trouble she had caused her.

* * *

Lana rested on the wall outside the Estate, trying to calm herself. She was so angry. And she was reluctant to face what was waiting for her inside. Her mother would want an explanation. How do you explain your sexuality though? _Umm, penis just isn't for me, Mother..._Damn Isabela for messing with her like this!She forced herself not to cry, fighting back the tears which were still building in her eyes. Everyone had been warning her that this would happen. Maker, she had been warning herself for years! In the end it was always going to come down to this, and Isabela had reacted exactly as she expected her to. There was only so much one person could take though. The pirate had forced her into coming clean and she hadn't wanted to. Hawke slammed her hand against the wall in frustration.

"Are you alright?"

Lana straightened up at once and turned towards the doorway. Aveline was standing there, giving her a sympathetic stare. Lana could hear the chattering going on inside and turned away. She heard Aveline close the door tightly behind her, keeping anyone from listening to their pending conversation.

"If you're here to lecture me, please don't," Hawke begged, shaking her head. Aveline looked like she was ready to start and tonight Lana was at her wit's end.

"I don't think I need to," the guardswoman admonished, "You already know what I think. I warned you this would happen."

"Just leave me alone, Av," Hawke said, "It's been a long night and I'd hate to take it out on you."

Aveline could hear the strain in her voice. She didn't know how to comfort her without saying 'I told you so'. And that was definitely something which Hawke did not want to hear right now.

"There's going to be rumours about this, you know that right?" Aveline asked.

Hawke snorted, "At least the nobles will finally have something else to spread rather than just their legs then...I couldn't care less, Aveline."

The guardswoman sighed. Lana never made things any easier with her deflective humour.

"As you wish," the guard captain replied gently. "You know I'm here if you need to talk." She reached out and patted Lana on the back as the woman leaned against the wall with both hands, staring at the ground. The guardswoman then re-entered the Estate to find Donnic and get out of here before the second storm hit, between Hawke and her mother.

After several minutes, the nobles of the party began to file out into Hightown, all talking animatedly about what they had seen. It was no doubt going to be top gossip for months to come. By this stage, Lana was sitting against the wall of the Estate, feeling no desire to move. She could hear the nobles whisper as they passed. Some even made derogatory comments towards her.

"You ought to be ashamed of yourself, Serah!" a woman yelled to her.

"Oh yeah?" Lana called back, "Tell me, did it hurt when you fell off a whore tree and banged every nobleman on the way down... Walk on, Lady before I put my foot up your ass!"

All Lana wanted to do was crawl up into bed and forget about everything that had happened in the last twenty-four hours. Instead she was yelling sarcastic comments at bitchy noblewomen. She dreaded the next time she and Isabela would be face to face. Where would they go from here? That was if the pirate hadn't left already.

When the majority of guests had left the Estate(after yelling obscenities at Hawke, which she replied to in kind), Lana finally plucked up the courage to enter. There was only the noblewoman she had slept with and the Reinhardt's inside, talking to Leandra who was sitting on a chair, nursing a mug of wine. Her face was white. Lana approached then with her head down. Maker, it was as though she had done something wrong! What was so wrong with being herself? At least she wasn't fake like the rest of these bastards. Everyone turned to look at her, apart from Leandra who was staring at the ground, unblinking.

"Mother?" Lana said hopefully.

Silence followed. Her mother didn't even look up at her, acting as though she hadn't spoken. Or maybe she was just in shock still. Seeing your daughter kissing and touching another woman like that was bound to be a shock, but she was still your daughter no matter what. That thought never really seemed to enter Leandra's head though. It was so easy for her to just turn away. The rest of the guests gave Lana judgemental stares which wore her down until she felt about an inch tall.

"You've let your mother down, Serah," Emil's father said, disappointedly. "And your family name."

"Oh really? I've let _her_ down? Tell me, Sir Reinhardt, does your ass ever get jealous of the shit that comes out of your mouth?" Hawke replied sarcastically. "Don't pretend you know anything about my family." _Asshole! Who is he to judge me? _

"You ought to curb your tongue, girl!" he scolded angrily.

"You ought to get out of my Estate!" Lana replied. "And take your son with you because as you no doubt know by now, I'm not interested!"

Hawke sighed and shook her head, continuing onwards, ascending the stairs tiredly. She had no desire to fight anymore. She was eager to get away from everybody and just close her eyes for a second to try to figure this all out. Lana entered her bedroom and slammed the door behind her. She then wrapped herself in her covers, without even changing out of her dress and tried to force everything out of her head as it hit the pillow.

* * *

After several hours, Lana was still awake. She hadn't really expected to be able to sleep. Isabela was still in her thoughts. Her mind flashed back to their brief fumble in the room downstairs during the dinner party. If Leandra hadn't of interrupted, Lana had been Isabela's in that moment. The pirate had completely worn down Hawke's resistance to her charms. But something always got in the way when they made it that far. It was probably a good thing though, seeing as to how the pirate reacted afterwards. Suddenly there was a knock on the bedroom door. Her mother entered.

Lana?" she asked uncertainly. Hawke opened her eyes and sat up, surprised. _So she hasn't cast me out once again?...Oh, Lana give it time. I'm sure she will eventually._

"What you're not ignoring me now?" she asked spitefully. Leandra sat down on the corner of the bed. Her face was stern.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked, staring into her daughters eyes. Lana's jaw tightened.

"Tell you what?"

"You know what!" Leandra said, her voice getting louder, "Why did you have to embarrass me like that in front of everyone?"

Lana's mouth fell open, her eyes wide. She shook her head, laughing bitterly. Her mother really was unbelievable. "I might have known you'd make this about you!" Hawke replied angrily. "What about me, Mother? Do I ever enter your thoughts? Or do you just use me to get what you want?"

Lana realised then, as the words left her mouth that they sounded just like Isabela. Suddenly she remembered the pirate's words back in that cell in the brig all those years ago: "_We're the same Hawke, whether you want to admit it or not". _It was pretty much what the pirate had been telling her all these years. That Leandra was only being civil to her because Lana had everything, whereas she had nothing anymore. The woman had used her daughter to get back into Hightown and regain her status as a noblewoman, then lashed out when Lana had 'soiled' her good name. Now she didn't want anything more to do with her. That realisation hurt Hawke more than anything else which had occurred tonight.

"How can you ask me something like that?" Leandra said, exasperated. "I am your mother!"

"When it suits you!" Lana yelled, jumping up out of bed. She began to pace the floor then. "I'm an embarrassment to you!?"

"You were being..._filthy _with a pirate whore!" Leandra countered. "After everything I went through to set you up with Emil, you go and pull a stunt like this?"

"A _stunt!?" _Lana repeated in disbelief, "I like women, Mother! I always have. Maybe you would know that already if you paid a speck of attention to me! But all you're interested in is reclaiming your lost youth. The Amells this and the Amells that! As far as I'm concerned the Amell family can kiss my ass! I never wanted to be one of you. Lay all your shit at my feet like you usually do, though! By all means...I'm used to it by now."

Leandra looked furious. "Don't you talk to me like that! And how dare you bring _her_ into this house! She's nothing but a common criminal. Aveline told me!"

"This is my house, Mother!" Hawke yelled, "Not yours! And Isabela is my friend!" (Or was...that still remains to be seen)

"More than friends by the looks of it!" Leandra spat disgustedly. "She was touching you all over!"

"AND WHAT!?" Lana screamed. She was completely loosing it now. "What's business is it of yours who I...What I...UGH!"

Hawke grabbed her jacket and stormed over to the door. Why was she being made to feel this way? She didn't ask for any of this.

"Don't you run away from me, young lady!" Leandra yelled after her, getting to her feet, "You have some explaining to do!"

Hawke turned back furiously as she reached the top of the stairs. "I have _nothing_ to explain to _you_!" she spat, "No matter what I say or do I'm always going to be a disappointment in your eyes! Well, screw you,' _Mother!' _I don't give a damn what you think of me anymore! I don't deserve to have you blame me for everything that goes wrong in your life! And you don't deserve any of us, me, Bethany, Father or Carver! Mourn them all you want, Leandra, but in the end that guilt will always come back to you and _your_ failures as a parent! Not my failures as a daughter!...You never wanted to be a Hawke! So go marry some piece of shit nobleman like you were always destined to do and get out of my life forever...because I don't need _any _of this anymore!"

Leandra's hand rested over her heart and her mouth fell open at Lana's words. Hawke gave her one last look of disgust and turned on her heel, sprinting down the stairs and out of the Estate, passing a shocked Bodhan and Gamlen on the way. With nowhere to go Lana headed in the direction of Fenris' Estate. She needed somewhere to stay and he was closest. Normally at times like this it would have been The Hanged Man. But Isabela was no doubt there, flirting with whoever took her fancy tonight. She would no doubt be burying away her feelings in another's bosom. Fenris wasn't one for small talk, which suited Hawke perfectly. It wasn't like she wanted to relive any of this bullshit anyway. The brooding elf welcomed her in with open arms and gave her a bottle of wine and a bed without prying into her business. After taking a few much-needed sips to drown her sorrows, she passed out on the bed, hugging the bottle tightly, forgetting everything which had transpired this disastrous day and falling into a terrible nights sleep.


	17. Chapter 17

Lana was finally going home after staying with Fenris for a week. The elf had enjoyed the company but Hawke believed it was time to face the music and finally claim back control of her Estate so to speak. Fenris insisted on coming with her though. She guessed for moral support against her mother. _I hope he uses that fist thing on her! I bet if he reached inside her chest though there wouldn't be a heart for him to steal. _Hawke had purposely stayed indoors to avoid Leandra and any other noble in Hightown who had witnessed her 'embarrassing' her mother the night of the dinner party. Bodhan had delivered her clothes to allow her to change out of the revealing red dress. She hadn't seen anyone since then, Isabela included. Fenris had informed her that the pirate was still living in The Hanged Man. It made Hawke a little happier to know that the Rivaini hadn't run for the hills after their last confrontation. Or maybe she just hadn't left because she had no ship to escape on. Either way, Hawke was glad that Isabela had stuck around, even though she couldn't imagine where they would go from here.

"You look nervous, Hawke," Fenris observed, as they approached the Estate, "Do you want to guess what colour my underclothes are again? Would it make you feel better?"

Lana laughed, "Believe me that would be much more fun than what I am about to do...I'm fine though, really."

The elf gave her a sceptic look. "If you say so. I don't even know why you bothered with a dinner party in the first place. Don't people usually just try to kill you the moment they meet you?"

"Pretty much," Hawke said chuckling, "I can't go twenty minutes without getting jumped. And after that dinner party I think I prefer it that way. At least then I don't have to listen to the crap that falls out of their mouths. I can just silence the old buggers. You wouldn't believe how much my sword arm was twitching at that party!"

Fenris laughed. He didn't doubt her for a second. Under the jokes he could still see the strain on Lana's face though. However, he knew it wasn't only to do with Leandra.

"Are you going to see Isabela today?" Fenris asked carefully. He saw the frown on Lana's face deepen.

Hawke hesitated. "I...I don't know...I could use a drink in The Hanged Man but..."

Fenris saw Lana cringe a little. She still hadn't told him what had happened between her and the Rivaini, but he could guess. Their games of flirtation had taken on an entirely new form recently and they had probably taken it a step too far. Isabela tended to push things to the limit, and Hawke wasn't far behind her in that respect. The two women had a talent for trouble. That was part of the reason they got on so well. They were very similar, but at least Hawke hadn't tried to sleep with him yet. Isabela on the other hand had tried to seduce Fenris a few days after they had met. If not for the games she played with Hawke, he might have considered it. The pirate was cold inside, and Fenris shared that with her. He knew Hawke had a heart though. He envied her a little for it. That was probably the main difference between her and Isabela. There was a certain warmth to Hawke which drew others to her like a moth to a flame. She didn't notice it herself but Fenris certainly had, and so had her other companions. For Hawke to draw in someone like Isabela as she had, there must be something the Rivaini liked in her other than her looks. But they were distant now. The jokes were done. Something had definitely happened between them.

"I'm sure whatever it is you can work it out," the elf assured her, "A few drinks wouldn't go amiss."

Lana said nothing. She dreaded to think what a few drinks would do to this situation with Isabela. _It couldn't hurt, could it? _Sometimes what seems like an antidote can turn into a poison though. And their relationship was poisoned enough by the mention of 'love'(however little). Lana didn't want to give Isabela another excuse to run away. She was really surprised the Rivaini was still here.

At the door to the Estate, Hawke heard Gamlen shouting within. _What is he even doing in my house? _At first she thought he was calling her mother but after entering the living area with Fenris she realised he was shouting at Sandal. The little dwarf was none the wiser though.

"LE-AN-DRA!" Gamlen yelled, spelling out each syllable for the young dwarf. Sandal stared up at him with his large blue eyes, drool sliding from his mouth as it usually did. Lana sniggered. He was a cute child. A bit odd, but then weren't they all?

"How long have I been gone?" Lana interrupted from behind him, her voice heavy with sarcasm, "Leandra has learnt to become a dwarf! What a transformation! A definite improvement!"

"Enchantment!" Sandal shouted, breaking into a wide grin at the sight of Lana.

Gamlen turned around, rolling his eyes, "Very funny, Girl...Where's your mother?"

"What Mother?" Lana said bitterly. Gamlen sighed.

"Look, I know you two aren't...I...I felt for you after that dinner party, I did...Leandra was..." he stuttered. Hawke's eyes widened in surprise. She hadn't expected sympathy from anyone, least of all Gamlen. They had never gotten along. The sorrow in his eyes seemed genuine though, the most genuine look Hawke had ever seen there. _In his own way I guess he really does care about me._

"Thanks..." Lana answered stiffly, lowering her gaze and scuffing the ground with her foot. Gamlen shuffled uncomfortably as well. Neither of them was accustomed to being nice to each other. Fenris stared at them both strangely, feeling slightly uncomfortable himself. After several seconds Gamlen cleared his throat.

"Well...yes...anyway," he began, "Leandra was supposed to visit me as she does every week, but she hasn't shown up. Do you know where she is?"

Lana shook her head. "I haven't seen her since..."

An awkward silence passed between them once more. Suddenly Bodhan entered.

"Serah Hawke!" he exclaimed happily, "Great to have you back! This week was very dull without you. Lady Leandra has barely been here. It's just been me and Sandal for the most part. Isn't that right my boy?"

"Enchantment!" Sandal said loudly, with a nod.

Lana smiled, "Thank you, Bodhan. It's good to see you too. We're looking for Leandra as it happens. Have you seen her today?"

"Not since this morning, Serah," Bodhan replied, "I gave her a bunch of flowers from her suitor and she left at once, a huge smile on her face."

"Suitor?" Gamlen exclaimed, "Leandra never mentioned a suitor!"

"Actually, she told me something about it," Lana revealed, "The night of the dinner party. She was considering remarrying. I knew there was someone on her mind."

Gamlen looked gobsmacked. "Well...did she say anything about him?"

Lana shook her head. "Nothing in particular."

"Eh, Hawke," Fenris interrupted. Lana turned to him. He was pointing to something on the mantelpiece, his brooding face frowning in suspicion. "Recognise them?"

Hawke followed his gaze. There, resting in a vase, threateningly beautiful, was a bunch of white lilies. _Oh Maker, No! _Her blood ran cold.

"White lilies..." she whispered, turning back to Fenris with wide, fearful eyes. Her tone turned businesslike at once. "Go to The Hanged man and round-up the others. Varric and Aveline said they'd be there. I'll meet you in Darktown in five minutes."

Fenris hesitated before leaving. "And Isabela?" he asked uncertainly. Lana paused, considering. A part of her wanted to see the pirate but then she remember the cold look on Isabela's face the last time she had seen her. _It's easier this way. _Her jaw tightened.

"No," she said stiffly, "Don't ask her. She won't care anyway and...I can't...No."

Fenris nodded once and set off at a run, without asking the reason for Hawke's reluctance. It was none of his business.

"What's going on?" Gamlen asked worriedly. "What's so bad about a bunch of white lilies?"

"I know something about that," Hawke said, grabbing her daggers from the rack on the wall and running to the door of the Estate. She had no time to explain. Time was running short as it was.

"Don't just leave me waiting, what is it?" Gamlen demanded jogging after her. They ran out into Hightown, heading in the direction of Darktown as fast as they could. Gamlen was confused as to the sudden seriousness of this situation. He struggled to keep up with Lana's speed.

"There's a killer on the loose in Kirkwall, Uncle!" Lana shouted over her shoulder, pushing through the crowds of Hightown shoppers. "He sends his victims white lilies before he takes them!"

"What? Don't be stupid. Your mother would never fall for someone like that...and besides I've never heard of him. I bet she's fine. You're overreacting."

Lana rolled her eyes, hearing her uncle mumble in denial behind her. "He's murdered several women already, Uncle! Trust me!"

Gamlen stopped running then, his face white as a sheet. He looked unsteady. Hawke looked back and halted, seeing her uncle frozen still. She couldn't believe it. _Andraste's Ass now's not a good time for a rest!_ She ran back and tried to drag him with her.

"Hurry up, Gamlen! We don't have much time! What are you waiting for?"

"I...Maybe she just...took another path to my house, Lana," Gamlen said, trying to convince himself. He looked beside himself with worry. "I'm sure I just missed her. I should just...wait for her there, shouldn't I?"

Lana saw the fear in her uncle's eyes. He always was a coward. This time she couldn't blame him though.

"Fine!" she exclaimed, "Go wait at home! I'll let you know when I find her."

Lana patted him on the shoulder and sprinted down the numerous steps which would eventually lead to Darktown. _If that bastard has touched a hair on my mother's head I'll tear him apart!_

* * *

Hawke ran the length of Darktown searching and searching. It was hard to find one individual among the sick and the weary, even if he was wearing noble clothes. Fenris was waiting with Varric by Anders' clinic.

"Where are the others?" Lana asked, trying to catch her breath. She expected more than two.

"Aveline's on her way. She went to get Daisy," Varric informed her. "We're to send word where to meet her.

"Alright let's go!" Hawke said, about to set off. "We need to find Gascard Du Puis!" Suddenly the door to the clinic opened behind them.

"Hawke..."

Lana spun around, feeling her anger flare at that voice. _Anders_.

"What do you want, Asshole?" she growled, her eyes flashing dangerously. She was in no mood right now. There was no time for pleasantries (or insults). Her only hope was to find her mother alive and well. What ever their differences, she couldn't help but still care about her. This flaming mage had some nerve to try and speak to her in this moment, especially after what he had done. She had managed to avoid him for years. Why now, of all times did he decide to show himself?

"I heard about, Leandra," Anders continued, stepping outside. "I want to help."

"Like you helped my sister all the way to the Gallows?" Hawke spat before turning away. "Go screw yourself! If you think I'd ever turn to you for help you're more stupid than I thought."

"Hawke wait!" the mage shouted running after her and grabbing her arm.

"Get your hands off me before I slit your throat!" Lana said through gritted teeth, trying to shake him off.

"Look, I'm coming whether you like it or not!" Anders yelled back, "This is dangerous blood magic we're talking about. You need me, Hawke!"

"Andraste's Ass I do!"

"Hawke," Varric began, "He's right...We don't know a thing about what this bastard is capable of. Think of Leandra."

Hawke pulled out of Anders' grip and sighed. They were wasting time here. She glared at Varric before turning to Anders, giving his a look of utmost loathing. "Whatever," she said shaking her head, "Just don't get in my way. I don't need another excuse to kill you."

The four of them set off at once to find Gascard Du Puis. Lana was reeling at the fact that Anders was running alongside her. She held back the urge to just run him through and be done with him for good. But now was not the time. They had to find Leandra before it was too late. The apostate Du Puis had been searching for this 'white lily' killer himself, after he kidnapped his sister a few years back. Perhaps he could help them. He was their only lead.

"Gascard!" Hawke yelled, spotting him leaning against the dirty wall of Darktown, beside a tunnel entrance. The nobleman looked up in surprise. Lana pushed through a crowd of dirty beggars and approached him.

"Hawke, what are you doing here?" he asked, looking a little worried.

"I need your help," she said desperately, "The killer has stuck again. I need to find him."

Du Puis turned away and leaned over the edge of a nearby ledge, staring out at the Gallows in the distance.

"I you're talking about Alessa...He already has her," the man said sadly. "She went missing not long after you 'rescued' her from me."

"I'm not talking about Alessa," Lana said, trying to speed things along, "Wait! You used blood magic on her right? To track her? If what you said is true, and she has been taken, can you use it to find out where the killer has brought her?"

Gascard turned back to her. He nodded. "I have enough of her blood for one ritual."

"You mean you could have stopped him this whole time!?" Lana asked in disbelief. "What haven't you done it?"

"I lost the power to confront him after you killed my shades the day that fool Emeric sent you to my Estate then got himself killed...But with your help, we could do this together."

Hawke felt wary of accepting his offer now. There was something fishy going on here. She had no choice though. Every moment spent talking was another wasted. Leandra's life hung in the balance.

"Fine, let's do it! Use the blood", she said. "I need to find my mother!"

"Blood magic's never the answer!" Anders exclaimed. Hawke turned and slapped him hard across the face before she could stop herself.

"Shut up!" she growled, "I don't care if you disapprove! I need to find my mother!"

Anders felt the side of his face where a red mark in the shape of Lana's hand was forming. There was a desperation in the woman's eyes. He could tell she was terrified. Maybe this wasn't the time for morals. He fought down Justice rising up to defend him.

"Sorry," he replied softly.

"Stand back," Gascard said, "If there is anything of Alessa left in this world this ritual will find it."

The four of them watched as the blood mage pulled out a knife and rolled up his sleeve. Lana had only ever seen blood magic being performed a few times before, but it always repulsed her. She felt her stomach heave as the mage sliced open his wrist with the blade with a sharp intake of pain. The blood that came out was a darkened red, tainted and congealed. You could almost smell the corruption from it. Suddenly Gascard was lifted off the ground as though hovering. He glowed bright red then fell back down, landing of his hands and knees. Hawke rushed to help him up.

"Well?" she asked eagerly. "Where is he?"

Gascard gave her a look. "A place I think you've been once before."

Lana kicked open the foundry door, breaking the lock with the sheer force, and entered with her companions (minus Fenris who had run to get the others). Anders, Varric and Gascard stalked along behind her, each of them wrinkling their noses in turn as a putrid smell assaulted their nostrils, which seemed to be rising from the very floor they were walking on. Lana covered her mouth, fighting the urge to gag.

"Do you smell that?" she asked, trying no to hurl. "It's worse than the bloody Deep Roads."

"Smells like blood," Anders said in a muffled voice, talking through his sleeve, "A lot of it."

Suddenly a rat appeared and skirted out the open door behind them. They all turned back, watching it go, feeling as though they should be doing the same. This place was unsettling.

Varric choked slightly, "It stinks so bad here even the rats can't stand it."

"Let's look around," Lana ordered, turning back to scan the insides of the foundry. This was where they had found Ninette's remains all those years ago. _That's not a good sign. _"Mother must be here somewhere."

The four of them walked further in, trying to find footing on the uneven floor. Varric glanced up at Hawke. He had never seen her more worried. The normally pretty, impish face she had was now lined with worry making her look almost twice her age in this dark foundry. The dwarf dreaded to think what would become of her if Leandra wasn't here...or was already dead. Hawke was strong but she always had a weakness where Leandra was concerned. Suddenly, just as Lana was about to walk up the stairs, there was a horrible, squelching sound and her foot slid a little to the side. She froze.

"Oh Maker," she whispered, her eyes shut tight, "Please, please don't tell me I've just stood on my mother's hand as well now."

Varric snorted in response, remembering a few years previous when Hawke had accidentally stepped on Ninette's remains in this very place. He looked down at her feet and exhaled with relief. "Don't worry, Hawke. It's just..._blood_."

Lana opened her eyes and looked down. Her entire boot was covered in fresh blood. She gagged, feeling the warmth of it seep through her shoe. Whoever's blood this was had to still be alive. _It could be Mother's...or the Killers._.

"Ughh, that's going to be hard to get out," she said, shaking out her boot, hearing the blood splat to the ground beside her. "These are brand new too." She continued up the steps. "There's more of it up here... I think it's a trail."

"Be careful!" Gascard whispered in the semi darkness. "He's here, I know it!"

"How do we know it's a 'he'?" Anders asked. _He has a point, _Lana thought to herself. _Maybe we have gone about this all the wrong way._ Gascard seemed certain though. And so did Emeric.

They searched the nearby hallway, following the bloody footsteps which stained the ground in front of them. More rats scurried past, making Hawke jump. Her every nerve was on edge. She had never been this terrified in her life. She wasn't afraid of the killer, but by what she might find at his feet. As much as Hawke hated her mother right now, she still loved her. It was a reflex action to care for her, no matter how much pain the woman caused her. Even if Leandra didn't feel the same way, she was the only immediate family Lana had left now. She couldn't lose her too.

"Look, a trap door!" Varric hissed, "That wasn't there before."

"Look's like someone forgot to conceal their hiding place. How inviting of them," Lana said sarcastically, "Let's drop in for a visit, shall we?"

"Right behind you," the dwarf whispered, "Bianca's getting twitchy."

Hawke lowered herself to the ground below the foundry, hearing the others jump down beside her. The horrible stench was worse in here, as though flesh was rotting somewhere nearby. Actually, maybe it was. Lana shivered.

"Ugh, Maker's Breath that _smell_!" she complained, her eyes watering as it wafted up once more. There was an annoying buzzing sound of flies nearby. They were no doubt revelling in the human remains scattered on the ground around them.

"What's that!?" Gascard gasped, pointing to a makeshift bed in the corner. A woman was lying on it, unmoving. Lana ran towards her.

"Mother!" she exclaimed, rolling the woman over. The dead woman's hand fell limply beside her. It wasn't Leandra.

"Alessa!" Gascard hissed, shaking his head, "I tried to save her...but she wouldn't listen to me."

Hawke felt sick. "You did the best you could, Gascard. Let's move on. We don't have much-"

Suddenly the ground erupted all around them and deafening screeches filled the air. Hawke and the others turned around in surprise.

"SHADES!" Anders yelled.

All four of them withdrew their weapons and charged.

* * *

Isabela, Fenris and Aveline waited outside Merrill's home. The mage had only just woken up (or rather been wakened by a fierce-looking Aveline) and told of Leandra's disappearance. She was busy getting ready as quick as she could while the pirate, the elf and the Guardswoman gave her some privacy. The two women leaned on either side of the door frame, glaring at each other while Fenris stood with his arms folded, grumbling impatiently.

"Why do you even want to come, Whore?" Aveline asked annoyed, "You don't even like Leandra."

Isabela chuckled, "You got me there, Big Girl. The woman's a stone cold bitch and I couldn't care less about what happens to her...But Hawke's my friend. I'm doing this for her."

"More than friends it seems," Aveline grumped, referring to the dinner party.

"That," Isabela began, "is none of your business, Prude."

"It is when you mess my friend about," Aveline replied angrily, "You caused her a lot of pain that night."

"I know," Isabela began with a smirk, "I pressed her up against that bookshelf so _hard_...oh, you should have heard Hawke moan from the roughness of it all. I can still feel her body writhe against me now. She almost cam-"

"Oh don't be so vile!" Aveline interrupted, "You know what I mean, Isabela!"

The pirate chuckled. She knew exactly what Aveline meant but did not want to discuss it, especially not with her.

"Hawke didn't want you to come," Fenris informed her then, "She was adamant that you stay out of this."

Isabela sighed. She knew perfectly well that Hawke didn't want to see her after that disastrous dinner party a week ago. She had hurt her badly, caused her a lot more pain and humiliation on top of what she was already feeling. But just because Isabela didn't love her back didn't mean she didn't care about her. _Maker's Breath, Hawke's the closest thing I've ever had to a proper friend!...Not that the Big Girl needs to know that. _There was no way she was running out on her when she needed her most. The pirate knew that no matter what Hawke said about her mother, no matter the trauma Leandra had put her through, she would be devastated if the woman died. One person could only take so much loss, and Hawke had already had her fair share of it.

"Well, she can tell me herself when she sees me," Isabela replied, refusing to stay behind, "I'm still coming."

"Have it your way," Aveline groaned. Isabela smirked.

"I always do, Big Girl."

"I know," Aveline agreed angrily, "And Hawke's usually always the one who pays for it."

Isabela straightened up ready to have a go at her. Just then Merrill emerged from her house, breaking up the impending fight. She lanced from Isabela's glare to Aveline's.

"Ready?" she asked innocently, as though they were all just going for a picnic.

"Let go!" Fenris ordered, rolling his eyes. Maker, he couldn't stand that Dalish girl sometimes. It was bad enough she was a mage but did she have to be so infuriating too? "We've wasted enough time here!"

The other three ran after him, heading in the direction of the foundry at the other side of Lowtown. Isabela glared at Aveline as they ran. _As if that iron lady is going to be able to comfort Hawke if this all goes tits up! _The Rivaini thought to herself,_ she probably can't even hug something without squishing it to death. _ Just then Isabela realised that she was just as inadequate. _ I'm really not good with emotional crap...Maybe I should have stayed behind. _It was too late though. They were already nearly there and there was no way the pirate was going to give the Big Girl the satisfaction of seeing her bail. _Hopefully we'll get there before anything bad happens._ It was a conclusion the pirate sorely wanted to believe.

* * *

"Oh shit..."

Lana bent down and lifted a piece of jewellery from the dusty, blood stained ground. Her breath caught.

"It's Mother's locket!" she whimpered, gripping the cool metal tightly in her hand.

Varric placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry, Hawke. We'll find her. Let's keep moving."

Hawke stowed the locket in her pocket and got to her feet. This wasn't looking good. _She can't be dead...She just can't be. _The four of them walked further, descending a nearby stair case. Suddenly it was as though they had stepped into someone's sitting room.

"Does he..._live_ here?" Anders asked incredulously, scanning the nearby bookshelf. "What a collection. Necromancy, Dark Magic, Blood Magic..."

Hawke felt lightheaded. "Please stop talking," she said. She didn't know whether it was Anders' voice or the words he was saying that was irritating her. None of this was giving her any hope. _And that smell! Maker's Breath! _

"Don't touch anything!" Du Puis ordered as Anders made to lift one of the books, "He has set up shades against us if anything is disturbed."

"Let's keep going," Varric said, "We must be getting close now."

The dwarf gave Hawke a gentle nudge in the back, who seemed to have become frozen with fear. She didn't move however. Lana was staring up a painting, her mouth hanging open.

"Maker's Breath!" she gasped. "What-What is this?"

The others turned as well, Varric and Anders mirroring Hawke's expression.

"That...That looks almost like Leandra!" Varric exclaimed. The portrait hung eerily over the fireplace. It was almost set out as some sort of shrine.

"A shrine dedicated to a wife?" Anders ventured, looking equally disturbed.

Hawke started to breathe rapidly. "I need to find her!" she said forcefully, turning and walking on ahead, "NOW!"

"Keep it together, Hawke," Varric said gently, as he and other others followed."This isn't over yet."

Lana swallowed hard and nodded. She shook herself slightly, trying to stay in control of her emotions. _I'm going to kill that bastard if he has touched my mother! _The four of them proceeded down a dark winding tunnel. After a few minutes they finally came to another staircase and made their way down. As Hawke and her companions turned the corner they stopped suddenly. A man in a robe was standing before them, talking to someone they couldn't see who was sitting in a chair. He looked up then, noticing he was no longer alone. A smirk appeared on his face.

"I was wondering when you'd show up," he greeted them. His voice was creepy, giving Lana the chills. "Leandra was so sure you'd come for her."

"You bastard!" Hawke spat, "I'm going to kill you!"

"Quentin!" Gascard shouted, stepping forwards.

"Gascard! So you've reached me after all these years!" the killer replied, amused. "I figured you'd give up!" Hawke turned to the Orlesian Bloodmage in shock.

"What?" she exclaimed, "You lying dirt-bag, Gascard! Why didn't you tell me his name was Quentin?"

"You promised you'd teach me, Quentin!" Du Puis yelled, ignoring Hawke, "You're going to deliver on that promise!"

"I promised to teach you, Gascard...But not teach you everything," Quentin corrected. He turned back to the chair then, staring down at its inhabitant. "When my wife died I lost all hope. I was not able to be the mentor you deserved. But now...my work is finished. I am free to teach you everything...if you join me..."

"You'll let me be a part of this?" Gascard asked interestedly. "You'll teach me the ins and outs of necromancy?" Hawke couldn't believe her ears.

"Come over to my side, Gascard," Quentin enticed, beckoning him. Du Puis smiled and made to move towards him, his dream finally coming true.

"I don't think so!" Hawke exclaimed in a fit of rage. She slashed her dagger so quick that no one saw it move. A splash of blood decorated the nearby wall and Gascard hovered on the spot. Suddenly a gash appeared on his throat and his head slid from his torso, falling to the ground with a sickening crunch. Anders, who was standing beside him, wiped the blood from his face and stared at Lana in shock. That was brutal even for her.

Hawke turned back to Quentin, murder in her eyes.

"Where is my mother!?" she demanded, breathing heavily. Quentin smiled.

"Do you know what the strongest force in the universe is?" he asked, walking back towards the chair and looking down into it.

"ME!" Lana replied strongly, "When someone messes with my family!"

"I can vouch for that," Anders added in a small voice. Varric and Lana glared at him. Quentin snorted.

"Love," he said answering his own question. "I pieced her together from memory...I found her eyes, her skin, her _delicate _fingers..."

Hawke shook her head, her hands sweating on her daggers. Quentin reached down and raised the figure's head who was sitting on the chair.

"...and at last...her face!" he continued. "Oh, this beautiful face!" Suddenly the figure got to its feet. It seemed to be in some sort of wedding dress. "I've searched far and wide to find you again beloved."

The zombie-like figure turned to face them. Hawke's mouth fell open, her chest tightening. Her heart stopped dead. _Blood of Andraste! _There, standing before her, was all that was left of her mother. Every inch of Leandra's skin was sewn together roughly, mismatched in places as though from a different body. Her face was blackened and rotted, eyes as white as the moon, empty and hollow inside. The white dress was covered in blood and dirt, torn in places revealing the extent of her torture. How she was even standing was a miracle. This was obviously a combination of blood magic and necromancy. It was the sickest form of magic Anders, Varric and Hawke had ever seen.

All of a sudden the ground burst open around them. _Skeletons! _Lana still couldn't move though. As the others began to fight around her she simply stared, broken-hearted at her abomination of a mother who was shuffling towards her. As she neared, Lana reached out to touch her. Suddenly a shield erupted around her, cast by Quentin.

"She is mine now," he sneered, hiding in his own magical shield. Hawke started to lose control. Her entire body shook in fury and she charged forwards with her daggers.

"You bastard!" she shouted in a fit of rage, attacking the shield which was protecting him with everything she had. Quentin laughed from behind it, knowing he was safe even as the giant pieces tore away with Hawke's blades. Demons and shades began to close in on Lana from behind then, surrounding her. She directed herself towards them, unleashing the sheer fury that boiled in her blood. It was darker than any tainted creature and ten times more powerful...and she couldn't control it. There was hatred inside her she had never felt before and it was all she could do to keep her head. As each of her enemies fell to the ground in pieces she felt her self slip away into the blackness, until all that remained was her hunger for revenge.

By now Aveline, Isabela, Fenris and Merrill had arrived. After their initial shock (to put it lightly) of seeing Leandra they immediately joined the fray. Isabela fought her way through until she found Hawke, battling with a demon by herself. She rushed over to help her. _Maker's Breath, she looks..._ No word in the Rivaini's head seemed to be able to describe Lana's expression. Isabela was just glad she was on her side. She cut down the creatures attacking her, protecting the only person she was here for.

When all the dark creatures were dead Quentin's shield disappeared. Lana lunged for him right away, feeling his magic assault her body as she advanced. But she couldn't feel the pain. The mage's spells, however powerful, were not enough against such sheer hatred and before her could stop her, Lana had grasped him by the neck and was strangling him to death without a hint of mercy. _Die, you son of a bitch! _Quentin choked and spluttered, feeling Hawke's fingers close around his windpipe. He scratched and clawed at her to get her away, his mana draining with his strength. Then after several minutes, his eyes went blank. For good measure, Lana snapped his neck, feeling pleasure at the crack which echoed off the walls around them.

The only sound which broke the silence was Lana's heavy breaths. Every one of her companions was staring at her in utter shock. They had never seen anyone lose control like that, let alone charming, sarcastic, lovable Hawke. Suddenly something began to approach from behind. The others separated as Leandra staggered over to her daughter. Hawke jumped to her feet.

"Mother!" she screamed, running forwards. She reached out and caught Leandra before the woman hit the floor. Lana lowered her to the ground gently, holding what remained of her in her arms. "Mother!" she cried, feeling the tears fall from her face. "I'm sorry...I'm so sorry!"

Lana held her tightly, rocking her back and forth. Leandra looked up at her.

"I...knew you'd come," she said weakly.

"D-Don't move, Mother. We'll find a way to..." Lana was lost for words. _This can't be happening!_

"Sshh," Leandra soothed, staring up into her eldest daughters distraught face. She reached up and stroked her cheek as best she could. "Don't fret darling...That man would have kept me trapped down here...You freed me."

"I should have been there for you!...Protected you better!" Lana said, "I...forgive me Mother...I failed you."

"There's nothing to forgive...Lana," Leandra whispered, shaking her head, "I...I've b-been a terrible mother to you. Carver's death wasn't your fault...I-I'm so sorry, my love. Its better this way...Now I can't hurt you anymore."

"No!" Lana said, shaking her head. "You can't leave me! Don't leave me here alone!" She ran her hand through her mother's hair, feeling the air leave her lungs. She pulled her in close, smelling the familiar flowery scent of her mother, reminding her of her childhood.

"I have to, Lana," Leandra said, a tear leaking out of the corner of her eye, "At...At least I'll see Carver and your father again..."

Hawke couldn't speak anymore she touched the hand her mother had placed on her cheek, feeling the warmth leave her already. She didn't have much time left. _No, please!_

"Lana..." Leandra breathed, struggling to stay alive, "Listen to me...I never stopped loving you...You've always made me proud." Tears were streaming down Lana's face as she watched her mother fade away in her arms. "Please..." Leandra begged, "Please forgive me...for everything..."

Hawke tightened her hand around her mothers, trying to find the words. After everything her mother had put her through, every time she had disowned her, every time she had blamed her for her little brother's death, called her an embarrassment, threw her out onto the street, slated her for loving women...and now she was asking for forgiveness? Lana swallowed hard. It was a lot to consider with such little time. Her mother stared up at her, waiting desperately, clinging on to hear her answer. Lana opened her mouth, struggling to find the words.

Suddenly Leandra's hand slipped from hers and went limp. Her eyes went blank, staring at nothing ever again.

"Mother?" Hawke whispered, shaking her a little. Leandra didn't move. "Mother!?" Still nothing. She was gone. "MOTHER!" Hawke cried, leaning down and burying her face in her Leandra's hair. "I forgive you," she wept, holding her tight, shaking her back and forth, "I forgive you!"

All of Hawke's companions watched in disbelief as Lana fell to pieces, hugging her dead mother and repeating her forgiveness over and over again. Her entire body was heaving with sobs, her cries the only sound in the foundry basement. It was a heartbreaking sound from such a strong woman. Not one of her friends knew what to do.

"Anders?" Hawke asked desperately, turning to the mage, staring up at him through her tears, "Please, do something! Help her!"

Anders looked close to tears himself. "I'm sorry, Hawke," he said gently, "Quentin's magic was all that was holding her to this world...I can't do anything, I'm so sorry!"

Hawke let out a squeak of despair, "Merrill?" she asked, looking up desperately. The Dalish elf was sobbing silently, unable to speak.

"There's nothing anyone can do, Hawke," Varric said sadly.

"Bethany..." Lana cried, hugging Leandra to her once more.

Isabela bit her lip, trying to hold herself together. She hated Leandra for everything she had done to Hawke, but if there had have been a way to bring her back right now she would have done it in a heart beat. The look on Lana's face was tearing her apart to see. _She's inconsolable...I can't see her like this anymore. _Realising no one was able to do anything for sheer shock, the pirate bent down beside Hawke. She touched her hair.

"Hawke?" she asked, gently, caressing the woman's dark brown hair as she clung to Leandra tightly. _Maker, what am I supposed to do? _Isabela thought to herself. _Nothing I say is going to make a difference. _ She touched Lana's hand, trying to relinquish her grip on Leandra. "Come here..."

Lana shook her head, "No, I can't let her go...I can't!"

"She's gone, Hawke," Isabela said gently, "I'm sorry..."

When Lana didn't budge Isabela looked back to the others for support. They all suddenly came to their senses then and crowded round, prying Lana gently away from Leandra's disintegrating body. Merrill was crying silently to herself in the corner as Aveline lay Leandra gently down on the ground. Her body was so fragile if they moved her she would fall apart, now that the magic holding her together had left. That was the last thing Lana needed to see.

Isabela reached down and lifted Lana to her feet, wrapping her arm around her waist. She could feel her shake uncontrollably under her touch. _Maker's Breath, she's going to collapse! _The woman swayed unsteadily. Fenris supported her from the other side then and both he and the Rivaini wrapped their arm around her together. Suddenly Hawke doubled over on all fours and threw up the contents of her stomach. The pirate cringed and bent over beside her, rubbing her back gently and holding back the woman's long, dark hair until she was finished.

"Sshh," the pirate soothed, "Come on, let's get you out of here. It stinks."

Hawke straightened up and allowed Isabela and Fenris to guide her back out of the foundry. They followed behind the others as Aveline led the way. Isabela glanced down at Lana worriedly every few seconds. The woman seemed to have gone into shock. _Not that I blame her. _The pirate held her tighter then, allowing Fenris to relinquish his grip once they reached the exits, all of them wishing they had never set foot in that Maker-forsaken place.

"I'll take her home," Isabela said, her arm around Lana's waist.

"Over my dead body!" Aveline exclaimed angrily, as though everything that had just happened was the pirate's fault.

Isabela snorted, "Nice expression, Big Girl... Great timing!"

Aveline cringed. _Damn it! _ "Give her to me," she growled, "You're probably the last person she wants to see right now! You'll only make things worse!"

"Are you two actually going to fight about this?" Varric asked in disbelief. "After everything that has just happened?"

"Get out of the bloody way, Aveline!" Isabela said irritated, "I'm taking her home whether you like it or not."

Reluctantly the Guardswoman bit her tongue and stepped aside, allowing the pirate to guide an almost comatose Hawke through the streets and back to her Estate. Aveline glared after them both, not trusting the Rivaini as far as she could throw her. She had messed with Hawke one too many times. Aveline would be watching her from now own.

As Isabela and Hawke reached the Estate, Bodhan opened the door.

"By the Maker! What happened?" the dwarf asked hysterically, seeing Lana slung across the Rivaini.

"Not now, Bodhan. She needs rest," Isabela said, guiding Hawke into the house and up the stairs. As soon as they were in Lana's bedroom she closed the door behind them and placed Hawke down on the bed. The woman sat still, staring at the ground. Isabela sat down beside her, extremely uncomfortable in these types of situations.

"I...I feel I should say...something," the pirate said, feeling stupid. Lana glanced up at her.

"It's alright," she said hoarsely, "I know you're not good at...emotional stuff."

The pirate sighed. "I'm sorry," she said softly, pushing back Lana's hair back behind her ears. The woman's beautiful face was lined with so much pain right now. Isabela wished there was something she could do to help her.

"I guess this is what it feels like to be an orphan," Hawke replied in a small voice. Isabela placed a hand on her thigh, squeezing her reassuringly.

"Family's not just the people you're related to by blood, Hawke. There are other people who care about you." Lana looked up into the Rivaini's eyes then. They both stared, becoming lost in each other as they so often did. Amber eyes piercing chocolate-brown ones. Isabela could see the sadness in Lana's, wishing for someone to come and save her. The Rivaini _so_ longed to lean in and kiss her, make her forget just for a second. But the woman wasn't emotionally stable for anything like that right now. Isabela placed a hand on her cheek instead then, caressing it gently.

"Like who?" Lana asked dejectedly, feeling more alone than ever. Isabela hesitated.

"Like...Aveline," she blurted, unable to say what was on her mind. _Great, now I'm putting a word in for the Big Girl instead...Oh Isabela you daft bitch!_

The pirate's hand fell from Lana's cheek then. _I can't do this sort of thing. _She got to her feet, feeling as completely inadequate in these situations as she always did. She longed to tell Hawke how much she cared for her, but she couldn't explain it. _It's not like I'm in love with her... I just...like her. _The Rivaini pushed Hawke down gently then, making her lay back on the bed.

"Get some rest, Hawke," she whispered, "Try not to think about it all."

Lana allowed Isabela to pull the covers over her. She was still in shock from everything that had happened. Her body felt like it was cracking into tiny pieces. The pirate blew out the candle on the bedside table then said goodbye and left the bedroom, leaving Lana to her thoughts. Hawke lay awake for hours, unable to etch the image of her mother's mangled body from her mind. Despite everything that had happened, she managed to cry herself into a deep sleep then, hoping and praying that she would never wake up so that she didn't have to face her grief again in the morning.


	18. Chapter 18

Hawke sat in the armchair in her Estate, staring into the fire. Yesterday had been the worst day of her life. She could still see her mother's face as she clung to this world, her eyes fading as what ever magic the mage had used was leaving her. There were stitch marks all over her body where that bastard had tried to reconstruct her into the form of his dead wife. It was the sickest form of magic Hawke had ever seen. She felt bile rise in her throat once more as she remembered the horrifying state she had found Leandra in. _How could anyone do that to another person? _Lana closed her eyes tight, trying to block out the flashbacks: cutting of Gascard's head, breaking the neck of the mage responsible, holding Leandra as she lay dying in her arms, the smell of rotting flesh.

Once again fury burned in her blood. She had just explained to Gamlen what she had seen. The man broke down in tears and blamed her for not taking care of her mother. It was like Bethany and Carver all over again. She couldn't save Carver from the Ogre, she couldn't save Bethany from the Templars and now...Leandra. Hawke grabbed a handful of her hair in both hands. She was starting to lose it. Maybe the Templars were right to lock the mages up. _What would Bethany think if she heard me say that? _Lana asked herself, disgusted that the thought had entered her mind. The magic that ran in her family had always been a curse though, a curse which Bethany and her Father had suffered from. She had never considered having magic a bad thing before yesterday. Her father had taught Bethany to use it sensibly. Lana wished it wasn't just mages who could be made tranquil. She didn't want to feel anymore pain.

"I wish you hadn't told me what that bastard did!" Gamlen cried. "I wish I hadn't asked."

He was sitting in the armchair beside hers, sobbing into his hands. Lana couldn't look at him. She was holding a quill and parchment in her hand, trying to write a letter to Bethany to explain what had happened, that they were both orphans now. Her shaking hand was hovering over the page, ink dripping from the quill all over it. She didn't even know where to begin. _Should I start with the fact that I broke my promise to you about taking care of Mother?...Or should I just jump into the juicy story of how she was tortured and killed by a necromancer? _Suddenly Quentin's face appeared in her mind once more. The agony that tore at her now was killing her. Unable to sit there any longer, she stood up suddenly. The ink bottle on the arm of the chair crashed to the floor along with the quill and parchment, spilling all over the place. Gamlen looked up. He saw the torture on Lana's face. She was shaking.

"I...I'll write the letter to Bethany, dear," he said as strongly as he could, getting up and placing a hand on her arm. It was his turn to be strong for her for a change. He was sickened just by hearing about Leandra's final moments. Maker knows what Lana had seen first hand. "Don't worry about it."

Lana couldn't stand to be in the Estate anymore. Without replying, she turned and headed for the door before Gamlen or Bodhan could try to comfort her again.

Aveline was sitting in her office at the barracks, writing reports when all of a sudden the door burst open. She looked up in surprise. Lana was walking towards her, her face wrecked with grief. Aveline stood up as she approached, staring at her sympathetically.

"Hawke...I'm so sorry about Leandra" she said instantly, her face falling. But Lana hadn't come for her condolences. There was fury reverberating off her that she needed to release. She strode up to Aveline until she was an inch from her face.

"Save your sorrys!" Hawke spat furiously. "This was your fault, _Captain_!"

Aveline looked taken aback. She knew Hawke was grieving but wasn't going to take her accusations standing down.

"My fault?" she asked confused. "I don't understand."

Hawke looked more enraged. "Don't you? You're Captain of the Guard! If you had of done your job correctly this wouldn't have happened! That mage wouldn't have had the chance to...m-my mother would still be..."

Lana's words faltered. She was breathing heavily, her anger out of control. Aveline stared into her face. She could tell that Hawke wasn't in any fit state to be reasoned with. And she wasn't in any state to be fought with either, even if that was what she wanted.

"I see..." the Guard Capitan said bitterly. "Well, if that's how you feel...fine!"

Hawke wasn't finished however. She riled up again. "You had leads and more than enough evidence to find that man! He's been killing women here for the past couple of years, right under your nose...and now my mother is one of them!" Hawke waited for Aveline to admit her guilt but Aveline shook her head in disagreement. She had never seen Lana look so deranged, but considering the state she found Leandra in, Aveline couldn't blame her. Even though she was angry, the Guardswoman relaxed out of her offensive stance and lowered her voice.

"We all grieve in our own ways, Hawke," she said gently, "You came here looking for someone to blame, to take your pain out on...but I won't argue with you." Aveline backed away. "I'm sorry for your loss."

Hawke shook her head and glared at her. She wanted Aveline to hit her, yell at her. But the Guardswoman just submitted. Lana gave her one last look of disgust before she stormed out of the barracks. The other guards stared at her as she passed having heard her scream blame at Aveline. By now they had no doubt read the reports about what had happened to Leandra. Their sympathetic stares made Hawke feel even angrier for some reason.

As Lana exited the keep she was still fuming. The rain was falling fast and thick, suiting her mood perfectly. She stood outside the doors to the keep and felt the rain soak through her clothes. Suddenly a wave of guilt washed over her. She shouldn't have accused Aveline, knew it wasn't fair to blame her. But her mind wasn't thinking rationally at the minute and all she knew was that she couldn't cope with anymore of her family's deaths being her fault. _Was I wrong though? _Part of her still stood by what she had said. The Guard Captain had slipped up where Quentin was concerned. Maker, she had even passed off the job of catching him onto Hawke! And now he had killed someone close to her. After staring up at the night sky, feeling the raindrops bounce off her face, Lana knew there was only one place to go to drown her sorrows: The Hanged Man.

* * *

The Hanged Man was packed to the brim as it usually was at night. Hawke walked up to her usual spot at the bar and bought a mug of ale. She knocked it back in one go and signalled for another one straight away. Corff, the bartender, gave her a concerned look before passing it to her. She knocked it back again. _It's too weak. I can still feel, still see the images in my head...I need something stronger._

"Give me a bottle of whiskey," she said. Her voice had a hollow tone. Corff hesitated momentarily, before he reached under the bar and set a bottle of his finest on the counter. Hawke threw all the coin in her purse onto the bar and grabbed the whiskey, swigging it straight from the bottle. Corff gave her another look of concern and reluctantly took the money. He clearly knew about Leandra. It worried him that Lana wore none of her usual charm. He also knew how much the woman liked a drink.

Hawke turned away and began scanning the bar, taking sips from her bottle. She noticed a couple of regulars but couldn't see any sign of Varric or Isabela. _Good, _she thought, just wanting to be alone. Isabela was more likely with which ever suitor had taken her fancy tonight. Feeling worse, Hawke turned back to face the bar. The whiskey was nearly all gone now. It had done the trick and numbed her pain for the time being. She leaned on her arms, staring down at the stained bar surface. _Where do I go from here? _She thought.

Suddenly Hawke heard a man's voice behind her.

"Well, hey there sweat thing! Fancy a drink?"

Lana ignored the voice and continued daydreaming, finishing the remains of her bottle. The man however persisted. He closed in beside her, hovering over her shoulder. Hawke suddenly sensed there was more than one man now.

"Oy!" shouted his friend in her left her. "He was talking to you, you little wench!"

She felt them both linger over either shoulder but found she didn't care. She didn't have any more fight left in her. Hawke drained the last of her whiskey, unfazed by the potential danger behind her. _It's not like I can hurt anymore than I already am. _The first man spoke again, hissing in her ear.

"How about we take that sweet little ass of yours upstairs and you can..._entertain us_."

Again Lana didn't flinch.

"What's the matter with this whore?" the other man shouted, confused by Lana's lack of care. "She some kind of retard?"

The two men began to laugh loudly, along with a few others they were with. Lana was still in a daze. She hadn't moved an inch, almost welcoming the pain the men were about to cause her. She was so weak right now that she wouldn't be able to fight them off.

The man on her right moved in again then. "Maybe...But I don't care if she is," he sneered, "I'm not interested in talking anyway...not when she has an ass like that."

The other men watching began to howl and whistle then, egging on their friends. The man reached out to grab her ass. Before his hand could reach however, his face suddenly collided with the bar with a sickening crunch. He collapsed to the ground, his nose pouring with blood. Hawke stayed where she was, still unconcerned by the commotion behind her. Suddenly she heard the other man gargle as though being held around the throat.

"Touch her again and I'll cut off your balls, got it?"

It was Isabela.

"Ugh! Let me go!" he choked.

The man fell to the floor in a heap as she released him. He retreated quickly back to his table, followed by his friend who was covered in blood. Isabela looked at Hawke then. The woman still had her back to the bar, staring into nothingness. _Maker, she could have taken those men out with her eyes closed, _Isabela thought to herself. It worried her that Lana hadn't even flinched the whole time they were harassing her. The Rivaini sighed. She eased in beside Hawke, leaning her own arms on the bar.

"Another bottle of whiskey for my friend here!" the pirate shouted to Corff, who had watched the scuffle. He grabbed another bottle right away and sat it on the bar. Isabela grabbed it and took a sip before handing it out to Lana. Hawke didn't even look up. She simply leaned on the bar with both arms and stared at nothing in particular. Isabela took another swig before speaking.

"Think you can come into my local and not have a drink with me?" she said, jokingly.

"I don't want any company," Hawke replied, dryly, not looking up at her. "Shouldn't you be upstairs with some whore right now rather than wasting your time with me?"

Isabela looked at her sadly. She had watched Leandra die as Hawke held her, clinging onto the last of her family. The woman had completely broken down. Now though, she looked as cold as ice. Isabela wasn't good with emotional stuff but it worried her that Lana had turned so cold in a matter of hours. As much as she hated to admit it, the Rivaini had begun to care for Hawke over the past couple of years. _I'm not in love with her though...I don't fall in love. _Anyone else would have been insulted by Hawke's snide comment but Isabela knew her too well.

"Well seeing as all the men in this place are trying to feel you up rather than me, I think I'll take my chances with you," she replied smiling. Hawke didn't know what to say. Normally a comment like that would have made her laugh but she couldn't even crack a smile. Isabela slid her arm around her waist then and gently tugged her away from the bar.

"Come on," she said softly, taking her hand. Hawke went with her reluctantly, grabbing the whiskey bottle as Isabela led her through the crowded bar and up the stairs. She brought her to her room at the end of the hall and sat Hawke her down at her small, rickety table before closing the door tightly, blocking out the noise from the tavern below. Isabela grabbed two mugs from the cupboard and placed them on the table. She took the bottle from Hawke's grasp and filled them up, handing her one then sitting down opposite her with the other. Hawke raised the mug to her lips at took a sip. Isabela stared at her for a second and then spoke.

"How is Bethany doing?" she asked. Hawke looked up at her.

"Gamlen's telling her today," she said sadly. _Because I'm too much of a coward to even write to her._

The pirate took a sip of her whiskey. Silence fell between them. It wasn't awkward though, just peaceful.

"You don't have to feel alone Hawke," Isabela said, placing a hand over hers on the table. After several seconds she pulled back, seemingly embarrassed by the effusiveness of her own words. "Have you spoken to Aveline?" she added lightly. _Maker, the Big Girl seems to be my shield against intimacy now. _Hawke nodded gloomily.

"I paid Aveline a visit...screamed at her...blamed her for what... happened," she said, putting her head down in shame. "I wanted her to argue with me...hit me even...but she just stood there and took it. I know it was my fault I just...can't deal with anymore guilt."

Isabela reached across the table and placed her hand over hers again then. "It was not your fault," she said. "You have to stop blaming yourself for everything, Hawke. You can't always be there to save people." Hawke looked up again, finding Isabela's amber eyes with her brown ones. Isabela continued with a smirk. "And if you still want to take your anger out on someone, well...angry sex is a great reliever of tension."

This time Hawke managed a small smile. Isabela may not be good at dealing with emotions but she sure knew how to make someone laugh. The pirate drained the last of the whiskey and stood up. "I'm going to get us a bottle of port. Wait here." Isabela left the room, leaving Hawke to her thoughts. Lana could no longer hold back her tears. They spilled out, falling down her cheeks until she was overcome with uncontrollable sobs. Angry with herself she got up and walked around the room trying to regain her composure. On the bedside table she suddenly spotted playing cards. _Well this is Isabela's room, right? _Wiping her eyes, she crossed the room and grabbed them, bringing them back to the table.

Isabela returned with another bottle in her hand. She poured them another drink and sat down facing Hawke, who handed her, her cards. Isabela could tell that Hawke had been crying. She suddenly felt the urge to reach out and wipe the woman's moist cheeks. _No, things are confusing enough between us as it is. _She knew as well, that Hawke hadn't wanted anyone to see her cry and didn't want any sympathy either. She just wanted to be left to grieve in her own way. And Isabela was fine with that.

The pirate smiled as she shuffled the deck. She loved playing cards, as did Lana. They drank and talked as they played. Hawke felt herself cheer up a little as the night went on. Isabela was doing a good job taking her mind off Leandra and all that had happened. They began to argue then as usual, as Isabela continued to cheat as she usually did. After a few hours Hawke jumped up in frustration and leaned over the table towards her to get a look at her cards.

"What are you hiding?" she demanded, "Let me see! You stacked the deck again didn't you?"

Isabela pulled them away, laughing slyly, while Hawke lunged over the table and tried to wrestle them from her hands.

"I didn't!" she yelled, grinning cheekily. "Get your paws off me!" Lana snorted. Isabela couldn't hide her sleeked ways if she tried. It was written all over her face.

Suddenly the pirate lost her balance and fell backwards off her stool, Hawke falling over the table and landing on top of her. The entire table overturned then, tossing all their cards and coin on the ground. The bottle of port and their two glasses bashed loudly as they hit the floor, their contents spilling everywhere. The women continued to scuffle on the ground as Hawke continued trying to pry the cards from the Rivaini's fingers. Isabela couldn't hold on any longer then. Hawke snapped them away roughly.

"SEE!" she exclaimed, examining them. "I always knew you were a cheating bastard! You palmed these cards the last game so you would get them this hand." Isabela laughed cheekily and pushed her off, rolling on top of her instead. She pinned Hawke's arms over her head, straddling her, their faces only inches apart.

"What are you going to do about it?" she teased, breathing heavily after the brawl.

Hawke smirked and struggled against her grip, trying to break free. "Get off me, Whore," she said through gritted teeth. Isabela snorted.

"Make me," she replied, "Or are you scared?"

There was a moment's pause then as the two stared at each other. Then suddenly their lips met before either could resist. Lana leaned up hungrily as Isabela bent down towards her at the same time. They kissed passionately, both moaning with eagerness. _Oh, Maker! _Isabela had wanted to kiss her the whole night. Lana had just looked so lost. Suddenly, after several irresistible seconds, the pirate pulled back (who'd have thought she could.)

"Hawke..."

"Shut up, Isabela," Lana replied bluntly, looking up at her. She knew where Isabela was going with this and didn't want to talk about what had happened between them the night of the dinner party...or what happened yesterday. _Maker, it feels like another lifetime ago I was worried about a stupid betrothal._

"You're not thinking straight," Isabela said, shaking her head. She desired Hawke more than anything right now, but was a little bit reluctant to have sex with her when the woman was this vulnerable. _And then there's that whole thing about her falling in love me._

Lana's face fell, "I don't want to think," she replied hoarsely, feeling the pain returning after her short period of release. _No, I can't face it! _She didn't want to relieve it again. She reached up and pulled the Rivaini towards her once more, kissing her eagerly, using the woman's embrace to bury her grief.

At the taste of her lips again, Isabela was powerless to resist now. _Oh balls! _She had desired her for so long and Lana was finally giving her what she wanted. The Rivaini didn't stop to wonder why. _How can I say no? _She laid her full weight back down on top of Lana and pinned the woman's arms over her head. Their tongues moved together, finally taking what both had been threatening to pursue for so long. The games had been fun, but the prize at the end was so much better.

Both women tossed and turned on the floor, each of them fighting to get on top, lips still glued together. The glass crumbled underneath them and the remains of alcohol soaked into their hair and clothes. Neither woman noticed though. Lana bit down on hard Isabela's bottom lip as the pirate trapped her below. Isabela groaned in pain (and pleasure), the metallic taste of blood lingering in her mouth. _Oh she's for it now! _She leaned down hard on the woman with all her weight, pinning her hands above her head. Lana's face screwed up in pain as the glass below her cut into her skin.

"Ughh," she moaned, gritting her teeth and closing her eyes tightly. Isabela giggled, satisfied to have gotten revenge. She leaned down towards her again, their faces close.

"Don't play rough if you can't handle it, Sweetness," Isabela whispered teasingly, placing a kiss on Lana's lips once more. Lana struggled beneath her again, giving her a bitter smile. Isabela leaned back and began to slide her hands down along Lana's perfectly formed body, caressing her sides before tearing her shirt open, hearing the buttons scatter to the floor. The pirate felt herself become wet as she took in Hawke's full, pointed breasts. She ran her hands along them roughly as she had done back in the brig all those years ago.

Momentarily distracted from her dominance, Isabela was caught unawares as Lana rolled her over until she was on top instead.

"Who says I can't handle it?" she said seductively, as she restrained the pirate's hands as she did hers. Isabela felt the glass below where they lay, cut into her as well. She laughed bitterly, revelling in the pain. After everything had recently spiralled out of control, it gave Lana pleasure to regain a little back over the woman beneath her. She ran her tongue along the pirate's gold lip piercing, taking it in her teeth and tugging gently. She heard the pirate chuckle. _That's a new one, _she thought to herself, amused. Hawke then brought her lips to Isabela's neck, kissing along her collarbone, sucking gently, while slowly moving her hands down to grasp her breasts. Isabela felt her massage them through her white top before reaching down and undoing the blue sash she had tied around her waist. Lana's hands found the hem of the Rivaini's shirt then and pulled it up over her head without a second's hesitation.

_Why is she in such a rush? _Isabela wondered to herself. It was as though Hawke was doing everything quickly before she could change her mind. Or maybe her mind wasn't in it at all. Before Lana could get a look at the naked body of the Rivaini beneath her, Isabela had pushed her over onto her back. Hawke could feel the liquid spilt on the ground soak into her naked skin. Suddenly Isabela stood and pulled her to her feet. Kissing her eagerly, their breasts pressed together she began to back Lana over to the bed before shoving her back onto it forcefully. Hawke fell backwards and leaned on her arms, watching as the pirate removed her boots then pants, sliding them down her long legs before letting them fall to the floor. Isabela smiled at her dangerously before removing her own boots until they were both stark naked, with nothing else between them. The pirate leaned her head down between Lana's legs then as though to pleasure her with her tongue, before pausing and getting to her feet with a wicked grin.

"Change your mind?" Lana teased as Isabela advanced on her once more. The pirate chuckled and knelt on the bed on either side of her, straddling the woman beneath her. Hawke allowed herself to lay back fully, her arms wrapped around the pirate's body, holding her close. Her tan skin was softer than Lana would have believed. Isabela always had such a hard outer shell of a personality. It was strange to think of her as soft in any way.

As the pirate gained control again, she reached down between Hawke's legs and began pleasuring her. Hawke let out a moan of ecstasy, aroused by the roughness of it all. _Maker, what am I doing? _She knew this was reckless even for her, knew she was lining herself up or more hurt. _But it's impossible to feel worse than I already do._ She bit down on Isabela's lip again, taking her pain out on her in every way she could. She knew Isabela liked it though, and that she would reply in kind. The Rivaini cried out and began to penetrate her harder. She could feel Lana tensing and quivering below her, could feel her breasts rubbing against her own as Lana pulled her in further, digging her nails into Isabela's back and then spanking her hard on the ass. The pirate chuckled.

Unable to be at her mercy anymore, Lana rolled over, bringing the Rivaini with her. They kissed again as her fingers travelled along the woman's abdomen, then further down and began to pleasure the pirate now. Isabela moaned continuously as she felt Lana inside of her. _Maker, she's good at that. _It was a strange experience for her to take, preferring to give out instead. Untrained hands on her womanhood revolted her normally, but this was different. Isabela had to admit, Lana knew what she was doing. After several minutes she lost her head and screamed out erotically. Lana collapsed on top of her exhausted and they accidentally rolled onto the floor, landing with a hard thud.

Isabela's lips moved to Hawke's neck. She could smell the gorgeous scent of her skin, almost taste it on her tongue as she ran it along her collarbone. _Is there a reason why this was so much more enjoyable for me than my other sexual exploits? _Hawke's perky breasts and voluptuous curves drove Isabela wild as she traced them with her hands, exploring the contours of her body. She dropped her attentions further down, first grazing each of Hawke's breasts with her lips, then following the tense muscles in her abdomen down past her naval until she reached her destination.

Lana let out an involuntary moan of pleasure as Isabela's adventurous tongue worked its magic. If the woman had a talent for witty and flirtatious banter, it was nothing compared to this. Hawke's hands rested on the pirate's head which was buried in her lap. She pulled off the blue bandana Isabela always wore, feeling her dark brown hair tickle her body as it fell loose. Hawke brushed it away from Isabela's face as the pirate stared up at her, with wickedness in her eyes, knowing she had Lana at her mercy.

When Lana had finally reached her limit, the pirate stopped and collapsed to the ground beside her. They lay there for several minutes as they caught their breaths, neither of them speaking. This had been a long time coming. Neither of them could believe that they had finally had sex with each other. Isabela never knew that another person could sexually satisfy her this much. She had long since reached the conclusion that she enjoyed giving out rather than taking but this encounter with Hawke had proved her wrong. She had never fought so hard for her breath at another's touch. Part of her wondered why Hawke had such an effect on her. She turned to face her.

Hawke's chest was rising and falling rapidly as she lay exhausted in all her glory. Isabela couldn't help but take another eyeful of the woman's body. She had seen her fair share of nakedness in her time but Hawke's was definitely something to be envied (even with the numerous cuts forming after their tussle over the broken glass). The best part was that Hawke knew it as well. She lay completely exposed, perfectly comfortable with how she looked. It was one of the reasons Isabela had been attracted to her. She liked a confident, beautiful woman. They knew how to play rough, just like her.

Isabela stood up and directed Hawke over to her bed again. They pulled back the covers and climbed inside, lying down and kissing each other once more. It was several minutes before they pulled apart.

"Thank you," Hawke said, staring up into the Rivaini's eyes. "For before, when we were downstairs at the bar."

Isabela smirked. "You didn't look like you had much fight in you. And there was no way one of those ugly bastards was going to get to grab your ass before I did."

They both chuckled. Hawke suddenly felt drained. She had lost so much and it was all crashing down on her once more. Tears welled up inside her as grief caught up with her again. She turned over, away from Isabela, not wanting her to see. _I hate feeling this weak. _For a brief couple of hours she had been numb to her pain. Now her tears streamed onto the pillow. Suddenly, to her surprise, she felt Isabela's warm arm around her midsection. The Rivaini wanted to just hold her, knowing that nothing she could say would comfort her. She enjoyed being close to her. It felt...right.

After a few unbelievable seconds of feeling the Isabela's arm around her, Lana pulled back the covers and got to her feet. _I can't be here right now, not with her. _Isabela watched her race around the room putting her clothes back on again.

"Where are you going?" she asked confused. Hawke didn't answer but continued to dress at full speed. "Hawke?"

"I can't do this," Lana replied finally. Isabela frowned.

"Do what? We've already done it!" she exclaimed in confusion. "Are you going to tell me what's changed in the last few seconds?"

Hawke said nothing but sat on the edge of the bed, beginning to pull on her boots. The woman stood then and made her way to the door, wanting to escape. Isabela jumped up at once, feeling angry now.

"Damn it, Hawke! You're not walking out on me like this!" she shouted. She rushed after her before Lana could reach the door handle and spun her around to face her. Only then did she realise that Hawke had succumbed to tears once more. Lana shook roughly out of her grip.

"Don't pretend you care about me, Bela," she spat bitterly. Her mood had changed drastically, taking Isabela by surprise. "We both know you got what you wanted."

"What?" The pirate exclaimed, shaking her head, "I'm not pretending anything, Hawke."

"So why comfort me?" Hawke asked, "You're not the type to let others cry on your shoulder."

"I...Hawke..." Isabela said sadly, lost for words. She tried to reach out to touch the woman's face but Lana flinched away from her.

"Let's not act like I'm anything more to you than another notch in your bedpost," she said bitterly, staring at Isabela coldly as though seeing her truly for the first time. Little did she know that she was, but she had interpreted it the wrong way. The pirate felt hurt by her words.

"...You are, Hawke..." she replied, truthfully. Lana froze, unable to believe her ears. _Isabela has feeling for me? _The two of them stared at each other, realising the whole dimension of their relationship had changed. The only problem was that Lana was in no fit state emotionally to be a part of it.

Hawke snorted, "Don't lie to me," she said hoarsely, shaking her head. "I don't want pity from you, Isabela."

"It's not pity!" the pirate yelled angrily, "I...I've recently started to feel... _something_ for you, Hawke...I was just too much of a coward to mention it before...and I know you feel the same way!"

Lana's eyes were cold. She sighed. "What makes you think I can feel anything any more?" she whispered painfully, feeling another tear slide down her cheek. "Don't think I don't know that this was all about your bet with Varric to seduce me."

"WHAT!?" Isabela exclaimed. _I finally admit feelings to someone and they reject it? Typical! _"Hawke that was just...before! It doesn't mean anything!"

Lana reached into her pocket and produced two gold coins. "Here," she said sadly, forcing them into Isabela's hand, "Here's your two sovereigns….I thought I would have at least been worth more to you than that."

Without another word Lana turned and opened the door, heading for the stairs in pieces. _I was wrong before...It is possible for me to feel even more pain. _Isabela looked down at the coins in her hand then up at Hawke.

"Hawke!" she called after her. Lana didn't turn back. Isabela raised her hand and threw the two coins after her in a fit of rage. They smacked off the wall and fell to the floor. When Lana had disappeared from view the Rivaini slammed her bedroom door shut and leaned against it, breathing heavily. She never thought one person could cause her this much hurt. She knew Lana loved her. She had admitted it. But now because of a stupid bet made years ago, the pirate was rejected the first time she had ever admitted to someone she had feelings for them. She sighed. _Nice job, Isabela...This is why I never let myself fall in love._


	19. Chapter 19

The morning after, Hawke found herself lying in her bed, unable to recall how she got there. She brought a hand to her head and rubbed her temple, trying to stop the room from spinning. Suddenly it all came rushing back. Her mother, Bethany, Aveline...Isabela. _I'm losing it. _She opened her eyes, not wanting to relive it all again. Hawke had no idea what she was doing anymore. Her head was all over the place. After years of flirting and near misses, she had finally given in and slept with Isabela last night. But there was no logical explanation behind her decision (if indeed that's what it was). She still had feelings for the pirate, without a doubt, even after all the pain Isabela had caused her. However, none of that had even entered into the equation last night. _Why did I go through with it?_ It was Isabela's actions which confused Lana more though.

As they lay in bed together, Hawke felt safe. She had managed to put her problems to the back of her mind for the time being and just enjoyed spending the night with someone who cared about her, never haing felt so lonely before in her life. But once the Rivaini had put her arm around her as she started to cry, Lana realised that she had just succumbed to pity sex. She'd finally scraped the bottom of the barrel and it was all she could to do get out of there. Isabela was never one to cuddle. She had said so herself on multiple occasions. '_Cuddling and sex just don't mix...but sailing and sex, they go hand in hand'. _So why did she even try? Hawke realised at that point that she had completely lost all her self-control and she had lashed out at the only person who was nearby. Her mind just wasn't thinking rationally at the minute. _Try seeing your mother mutilated by a necromancer and see how you feel! _But that was no reason to hurt Isabela, who had comforted her the only way she knew how. Somehow, Hawke had to apologise to her.

Lana straightened up and swung her legs over the edge of the bed, feeling a little queezy. She leaned forwards, resting her arms on her knees and exhaled. Nausea crept over her and she broke into a cool sweat under her nightshirt. _I'm never drinking again. _She knew that wasn't going to happen though. She went through those thoughts every time she woke up feeling like shit after a few too many the night before. But she realised that she had to stop drinking so much at least. _Bethany was right_. Lana got to her feet then and made her way to the water closet, wondering how she was ever going to make this up to Isabela.

* * *

Isabela rolled over and opened her eyes. Her entire room in The Hanged Man was in tatters after last nights 'events' with Hawke. There was glass, coin, clothes and alcohol spilt all over the floor and the rickety table was overturned and lying upside down beside two knocked over stools. The pirate got up and walked over to her little cupboard in nothing but her skin, trying to avoid standing on the broken glass in her bare feet (even though she had been rolling around in it with Hawke last night). _If it doesn't happen during sex then it's just not worth the pain. _She pulled out a small bottle of whiskey she saved for rainy days, poured a small amount into one of the remaining unbroken mugs and raised it to her lips, lost in thought.

Last night when Hawke had run out on her, she was fuming. Someone had finally done to her what she had been doing to others for years. She had been used. And it didn't feel good. _Bitch. _As she lay in bed alone afterwards though, Isabela realised that she couldn't stay mad at Hawke for long. The woman hadn't been herself since Leandra. It was obviously still fresh in her mind. _Maker, it was only two days ago! _Isabela did feel sorry for Lana, and although last night was anything but pity sex, she could see why Hawke's irrational mind seemed to think it was. _It was the wrong time for me to tell her I...liked her. _

The pirate could barely even utter the words in her own head. She slammed her empty mug down onto the top of the cupboard, frustrated with herself. _Andraste's tits, what was I thinking?_ Isabela never spoke of feelings to anyone. She was pretty inexperienced when it came to talking about how she felt (though she made up for it in other ways). But even she knew that the day after someone sees the last of their family being brutally murdered in front of their eyes, it's never a good time to talk about love. _Especially seeing as I'm not going to be around for much longer anyway...Not if Castillon has anything to say about it. _Hawke was right in the end. The pirate had finally gotten what she wanted last night. _And I don't want anything more. Just sex, _she tried to convince herself. _And if the sex was as good as last night then more sex after that. _Satisfied with her conclusion of denial, the pirate grabbed her clothes off the floor and put them on, before leaving her room and descending to the tavern below.

* * *

Lana walked with Varric, Fenris and Aveline to The Hanged Man after a hard days work. Unable to sit around moping all day she had thought it best to get on with things. Bethany had been told of their mother's fate and she hadn't replied. Hawke was worried about her. She needed a distraction and a few battles certainly did the job. _Pity I ended up finding the Viscount's son dead in the Chantry. Just once I'd like to have a day without seeing a dead body. _Aveline had accepted her apology this morning without question, for her accusations last night. Lana had expected a lecture but she got nothing in return. She wished people would stop treating her as though she was some fragile doll. She had done her crying. Leandra was gone and she was never coming back. There was no use sitting around thinking about it.

"What's got you slumming it with us today, Av?" Hawke joked. The Guardswoman purposely tried to avoid The Hanged Man when she could. Hawke couldn't understand why. The Guardswoman could make half her wages on the riff raff which hung about in there. A drink in one hand, chains in the other, rounding up the scum like cattle while enjoying herself simultaneously. _That's how I'd do her job anyway._

"I...I thought you might like some company," she replied, averting her eyes. Hawke sighed.

"I'm a big girl, Aveline. You don't have to look after me...I'm fine," she replied as convincingly as she could, trying to hide the irritation in her voice. The redhead was going to question her about her mother sooner or later, she knew it. Aveline was all about talking about feelings and problems. _Maker's Breath, for such an iron lady on the outside, she's just a big softie on the inside!_ Hawke smiled to herself then. If she said that out loud there would be an Aveline-shaped bruise on her arm right about now.

"Hawke, it's only been three days!" the Guardswoman replied, looking at Lana as though she was insane. Hawke shrugged.

"And...? What do you want me to do?" she asked with a grin, "Shall I cry on your shoulder? Do you want to comfort me with kisses and pat my head, whispering in my ear that everything will be alright? Or shall I blow my runny nose into your tissue and have you put me to bed and sing me a lullaby to make the bad dreams go away?"

Varric and Fenris burst out laughing as Hawke gave Aveline a cheeky grin. The Captain rolled her eyes, furious.

"You know Hawke, it takes forty-two muscles in my face to frown, but it only takes four to reach out and smack you across the side of the head!" Aveline retorted. This made Lana and the other two laugh even harder. Maker, the guardswoman hated it when Hawke deflected serious issues with humour.

"Ouch, that's more like it, _Captain_!" Lana replied, satisfied with Aveline's answer. "Pick your spot, I know you want to!"

"Don't tempt me," Aveline replied sourly, "I think you'd just enjoy it too much though. I still don't understand how you can joke about something this serious so soon! She was your mother, Hawke!"

Hawke sighed, "Sometimes Aveline, there are things which happen that are so serious... all you _can_ do is joke about them...Either that or go insane."

"I hear that," Varric agreed. Fenris nodded, understanding as well. Aveline looked at them all like they were nuts.

"Well, you won't hear me joke about Wesley anytime soon," she said grimly.

"But you don't talk about him either," Lana countered. Aveline considered this.

"You have a point," she agreed reluctantly, nodding her head, "I'll leave you be then."

"Thanks," Hawke said, smiling at her and throwing her a wink. "You're _so_ kind."

Fenris reached out and opened the door to The Hanged Man and they took their favourite table in the corner in front of the fire. As soon as Hawke sat down facing Aveline, something caught her attention over the Guardswoman's shoulder. She glanced past the redhead and her eyes found Isabela, standing on her own at her usual spot beside the bar. She froze. A sudden image shot through her mind of the two of them naked, writhing and squirming together on the glass-covered, bedroom floor, breasts pressed together, breathing heavily, moaning, feeling the glass cut into their skin...

"Hawke?"

Lana snapped out of her flashback and turned to Varric, realising she hadn't heard a word he'd just said. "Ah...What?"

"I'm getting the drinks in. What'll it be?" he asked again, confused she hadn't heard him the first time. Hawke hesitated.

"Oh...um...I'm still a bit hung-over from last night, Varric. Nothing for me," she replied. The dwarf looked shocked. It was the first time he had ever heard her deny a drink. He shrugged then.

"Suit yourself. More for the rest of us!" he said, walking towards Isabela at the bar. The pirate turned to greet him. She stared over at the table he was gesturing to and her gaze caught Lana's then. Hawke averted her eyes at once. _Am I blushing? _She shook her head. _How in Andraste's name am I going to explain what happened last night? _

"Hawke?"

Lana looked up again. Aveline had been speaking to her this time and she hadn't heard a thing. She and Fenris were staring at her curiously.

"What?" she asked absentmindedly, looking at either of them.

"I said how come you're not drinking? It's not like you," Aveline continued. Hawke blanked out of the conversation once more as Varric walked back from the bar, drinks in hand, Isabela in tow. Her eyes met Lana's then and they both stared at each other as she approached, each of them unsure how this was going to go. Hawke swallowed hard.

"HAWKE!" Aveline pressed, disliking being ignored. Lana wasn't paying attention at all now, though.

Varric seated himself at the table, however Isabela remained standing beside it, leaning on the back of a Aveline's chair. She and Lana hadn't taken their eyes off each other.

"Drink?" the Rivaini asked simply. Lana opened her hands in a welcoming gesture.

"Join us if you want," she replied. Isabela smirked and shook her head.

"I have a bottle of port by the bar," she said pointedly. The others were looking at them curiously. They had never heard them speak so carefully to each other. Normally conversations in The Hanged Man between Hawke and Isabela either made people's skin crawl or made them quiver with excitement. Now though, they were being very dry to each other. Lana bit her lip, hesitating a little, before nodding and getting to her feet. _I'm for it now! _

"I though you were too hung-over to drink?" Varric asked confused. "Or is my coin not good enough for you?"

Hawke cringed at his words. Talk of Varric's coin had come up last night with Isabela, she was sure of it...A whole two sovereign's worth. Lana refrained from answering him and slid out from behind the table. The others watched her follow Isabela back to her spot at the bar, wondering what this was all about. The pirate, indifferent to their staring, poured her a mug of port and handed it to her. Their fingers grazed momentarily as Hawke took the mug from her, sending shivers down her spine.

"Look...," she began, not knowing where to start. Isabela knocked back her drink and placed the mug back onto the bar as Lana looked down at hers, swirling it around the cup. "I...I'm sor-"

"You don't have to apologise," Isabela interrupted bluntly. Lana looked up at her then, seeing she was smirking. "I had fun."

Lana snorted, "So did I..."

"Then let's leave it at that, shall we?" Isabela asked, pouring herself another drink. _Shit, I hope she doesn't remember what I said last night._

"I shouldn't have handed you that coin," Lana said regretfully, cringing once more. _Why did I even bring up that damn bet? _

"I shouldn't have thrown it at you," the pirate joked, "I could have bought a bottle of The Hanged Man's finest with that."

They both chuckled. Lana placed her untouched drink back onto the bar. Isabela gave her a weird look.

"What, you don't like it now?" she asked. Lana shook her head.

"I do but...I'm trying to cut down," she replied, looking down gloomily at the redy-brown liquid in her mug, "The way my head is right now...I don't think I would be able to deal with it. Last night proved that."

Isabela frowned, seeing the pain on Lana's face. She remembered seeing her in tears last night as she left her room. As much as Hawke was trying to act like everything was normal, it was not. Isabela had a feeling it was only visible to her though. She was the only one who could see through the humour Lana used as a wall to shield against her grief. _Because I do it too._

"Hmm, I see what you mean," the pirate joked. "Your head was terrible last night."

Lana looked up then, seeing the pirate's cheeky smirk, "I didn't give you head," she replied confused.

Isabela chuckled, "Exactly," she teased. Hawke rolled her eyes and they both laughed.

"You know yours wasn't exactly mind-blowing either," she replied.

"Ooo nice word play," the pirate said, her smirk getting wider. "And don't lie to me...I can always tell."

Lana laughed. Isabela was too cocky for her own good.

"I got something for you, by the way," Hawke said just remembering. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a tiny ship in a bottle, handing it to her.

"Oh what's this?" Isabela asked, taking it in her hand. The Rivaini gasped. "Maker, isn't that just the cutest thing?"

Hawke smirked, "You can't see it, but below decks there's a prefect replica of you, and a dozen greased up sailors in attendance."

The pirate chuckled, "You tease," she said, laughing, shoving Hawke playfully on the arm, "I'm sure there isn't."

Hawke sighed. "I wanted to thank you in some way for...well, recently," she said, trying to avoid reliving it all again. "I don't know what would have happened to me if I only had Aveline to comfort me."

Isabela laughed, "The Big Girl would have had you wrapped under her iron wing, encouraging you to break down in tears, reliving each happy moment you spent with Leandra."

They both laughed. "No doubt," Hawke replied, shaking her head. She looked up at Isabela then, their eyes meeting. "Just when you think you've finally hit bottom...someone tosses you an anchor."

The pirate smiled and reached out to touch her face, "You're stealing all my analogies, Sweet thing" she joked. Lana grinned.

"Thought you'd like that one."

Isabela chuckled, "For what it's worth," she began, moving closer, "I'm glad I could be of use."

"You were...In more ways than one," Hawke said quietly, their faces drawing nearer. She heard Isabela laughed quietly as she leaned in. Their lips met then, bring with them all the memories of last night. Hawke felt the Rivaini's hand slid along her lower back, pulling her closer. She didn't care that they were in the middle of a crowded tavern, surrounded by their friends and pervy, drunken scoundrels. Lana reached up and touched the Rivaini's cheek as their lips moved together. She could taste the sweet wine off Isabela's tongue as it pressed against her own. Then-

"MAKER'S BREATH!"

Both women were forced apart by rough hands as Aveline stepped in between them. Without even looking at Hawke, the brutish Guardswoman shoved Isabela back roughly, before squaring up into her face.

"How dare you prey on her when she is this vulnerable?" Aveline spat. Isabela frowned.

"WHAT!?" she exclaimed, "Get your stinking hands off me, Griffon Lips!"

"I mean it, Whore!" Aveline growled, "You stay away from her! The last thing she needs right now is to be associated with the likes of you!"

Isabela shoved Aveline back then. Hawke quickly jumped in as she saw the pirate reach for her dagger.

"All right! Cut it out!" Lana yelled angrily, realising the whole tavern was watching them.

"I'll cut _her _out!" Isabela shouted, staring at Aveline with loathing. "Cut her a nice smile with my dagger...ear to ear!" The Guardswoman glared at her, her nostrils flaring.

"Maker's Breath, are you two ever going to get along? I'm tired of this shit!" Lana spat, still holding each of them back as they tried to get at each other.

"Hawke doesn't need you to babysit her, Big Girl," the Rivaini growled through gritted teeth, ignoring Lana.

"I'm not babysitting her. I'm trying to protect her from poxy tarts like you!" the Guardswoman yelled.

Isabela laughed, "_Please, _Aveline. I reckon you're just jealous!"

Aveline snorted, "Of you? As if!"

"Or maybe the fact that you haven't even had anyone look at you in years...let alone kiss you!" Isabela mocked, "You're splitting hairs over Hawke, while wishing someone would split yours!"

"I've had enough of your loose lips!" Aveline raged, "Like many I'm sure!"

"Hawke hasn't," Isabela joked, "In fact we were just getting started before you got your big steel-covered bollocks in the way!"

Lana was surprised that smoke wasn't coming out of the Guardswoman's ears by now. Her face was a furious red and she was still struggling to get at the teasing pirate behind Hawke.

"Take it down a notch, Aveline," Corff interrupted from behind the bar, "Or am I going to have to throw you out as well now?"

At his words the redhead stopped squirming and relaxed, though still glaring at Isabela who was smirking cheekily at her. _Come on, Big Girl, give me your best shot! _Lana turned to Aveline then.

"What in Andraste's Ass was that about?" she demanded.

"Why were you kissing _her _of all things, Hawke?" Aveline asked angrily.

"It's none of your damn business, Av!" Hawke replied.

"I'm trying to look out for you," the Guardswoman said sincerely, "That slattern is bad news and she's already hurt you once. How could you be so stupid?"

Lana could feel herself getting angry. "You are _not _my mother, Aveline Valen. Stop acting like it!"

"No...You're mother would be spinning in her gr-"

Before Lana could stop herself she lashed out and struck the Guard Captain across the face, unable to believe what she had been about to say. Aveline realised it too, and saw the surprise in Lana's eyes as she looked down at her hand as though it had acted of its own accord. _What have I done? _The Guardswoman straightened up, feeling the burning sensation of Hawke's hand on her already red cheeks.

"I guess I deserved that one," she replied bitterly, feeling the sting with her hand. She was embarrassed with what she had been about to say. "Sorry, Hawke."

"Listen to me, Aveline," Lana said furiously, placing a firm hand on her shoulder, "And listen to me good...You are my closest friend and I have known you for many years...but it's not up to you to fill the shoes of my mother."

"I know," Aveline sighed, "And I'm sorry...I'm just trying to look out for you."

"I _know,_" Hawke said gently, smiling at her. "And I appreciate it. Just... don't _ever_ interrupt me mid-kiss again...unless I'm kissing a man."

Her other companions burst out laughing then, including Isabela. The tense atmosphere was cured at once. _See, jokes are great in all situations. _Aveline sighed and rolled her eyes. "Fine," she relented, realising her hatred for Isabela had made her over step her boundaries where Hawke was concerned.

"Good," Lana sighed with relief, turning back to the bar. Aveline threw Isabela one final glare before she and the others turned and walked back to their table, leaving the pirate to lean against the bar beside Hawke.

"Bitch," she said angrily, "I was enjoying that kiss."

Lana chuckled, "So was I..."

The two women looked over at each other, brown eyes meeting amber ones. A moment of silence passed between them. Why did things always have to be complicated? Why couldn't both of them be able to love each other at the same time? One of them was always running away, for one reason or another. They had both been trying to win the game, without even realising what the game meant. Or maybe there was no game anymore. Isabela thought that after seducing Hawke, she would feel differently. That it would simply be a one night stand to top all of the others in her past. But she felt something entirely the opposite. Something she had never experienced before, and she could feel herself withdrawing away from it.

"Did you mean what you said...?" Hawke asked softly, "...Last night?"

Isabela hesitated. She swallowed over the lump in her throat. "About what?" she replied, playing dumb. Lana sighed. Isabela wasn't going to make this easy for her. _When did she ever?_

"About starting to feel ..._something..._ for me?"

The Rivaini tore her gaze from Lana's then and poured herself another drink. _Balls, I knew this was going to come up! _She picked up the mug, ready to raise it to her lips, when all of a sudden Hawke's hand reached out and covered it, pinning it to the bar, stopping her.

"Isabela..."

The pirate sighed. Hawke wasn't going to let this drop. She turned back to her, meeting her eyes again, "No," she said firmly, "I didn't mean it."

Hawke stared at her, feeling foolish for even having asked. Isabela fought hard to stare into her eyes and make her believe her lie. Lana couldn't see through the deception. _Of course it had just been said out of pity._ She exhaled then, feeling stupid for doubting her original thought and released Isabela's arm, looking away from her. Isabela raised the mug to her lips then, swallowing down the remains of her port. She glanced at Lana out of the corner of her eyes, wondering if she should have told her the truth. _No, she has too much going on at the minute...the way she had lashed out last night proved it...I don't want any of this anyway, no matter what I feel._

"I'm sorry, Hawke," she said regretfully, placing a hand on her arm, "But either way, I don't regret what happened between us."

Lana snorted lightly, "Me either," she replied. Isabela smiled.

"Well...Good...If you ever want to do it again..."

The pirate retracted her hand then and leaned over the bar, alongside Hawke, satisfied with the easy outcome. _Oh, you're such a coward Bela. After all these years and you finally found someone who you can stand to be around...and now you're running away. _The Rivaini sighed and took one last glance at Lana. _It's for the best...She doesn't need a screw up like me messing her up anymore than she already is. Better I lied than told the truth. That way, we both win. _


	20. Chapter 20

"SHUT UP!"

"I NEED-"

"BITCH-"

"GOING TO-"

"WHOLE CITY-"

"HAWKE!"

Aveline and Isabela jumped simultaneously as Lana appeared before them. She stared back at them both in confusion, surprised to see them in the middle of her Estate, arguing over the top of one another in loud voices. _Well, the arguing I'm used to by now. _Hawke had only made out a few words before both women turned and yelled her name.

"Eh...Hellooo?" she replied, grinning at them weirdly, looking from one to the other, "To...what do I owe the pleasure?"

"I'M GOING TO-"

"THIS IS-"

"CASTILLON-"

"SELFISH PRATTLE-"

"PRIG-"

"SLATTERN-"

"Maker's Breath!" Hawke interrupted, taken aback as the two women began shouting again. They fell silent at once, glaring at each other. Lana chuckled. "I know I have two ears, but that doesn't mean I can listen to the two people at once. What's going on?"

Aveline jumped in at once at full speed, as Isabela made to open her mouth. "HawketheARISHOKisshelteringtwofugitiveswhohave'co nverted'Ineedyourhelpsothisdoesn'tgetoutof-!"

"I'mgoingtoDIE!" Isabela interrupted loudly. Lana blanched, blinking a few times a she tried to process everything she had just heard.

"I-Ok...Um...WHAT?" she blurted out, even more confused now.

"Got your attention yet?" the pirate asked, "Real problem."

Aveline turned back to Isabela angrily. "This is important! Don't interrupt again with your selfishness!"

"_Selfishness?" _Isabela repeated in disbelief, "Why you little!"

The pirate raised her hand ready to strike the Guardswoman. Hawke, reading the danger (and nothing else so far), jumped in and intercepted, before her fist could connect. She recieved a welt to the head as the metal buckle of the pirate's gauntlet grazed off the side of her skull.

"OH! Damn it, Bela!" she exclaimed, screwing up her face, feeling her eyes water. It seemed like she was spending most of her time in between the pirate and the Guardswoman. _Well I can think of worse ways to spend my time then pressed between two women, _she joked to herself. _Isabela's beyond attractive and Aveline's, well...Focus Lana!_

"Stop!" she yelled, holding them apart. She could feel blood dribble from the cut on her head. "Maker's Breath! Calm down, both of you! All I heard was 'Arishok' and 'Die'!"

The pirate and the Guard Captain stopped struggling finally. Aveline shook out of Hawke's grip roughly then and exhaled, walking away a few paces, breathing heavily.

"Now, tell me what's happened, Isabela? Is it Castillon?" Lana asked worriedly, her hand still holding onto the pirate's arm. Isabela reached up, a look of concern on her face as she examined the cut she had made on Lana's head with her hand. _Andraste's Ass, she's bleeding, _the pirate thought regretfully,_ that must have hurt. It was intended to, seeing as it was originally meant for the Big Girl. _

"Remember the Relic?" she asked, while putting pressure on the open wound with her hand. Lana grimaced.

"Yeah," she replied through gritted teeth, "The one Castillon wants you to find. What of it?"

"A man called Wall-Eyed Sam has it," Isabela continued. Aveline held out a piece of cloth then, attempting to clean Hawke's bloodied head herself. The Rivaini snapped it out of the Big Girl's hand and did it instead. _The Iron Woman couldn't be gentle if she tried. _Aveline glared at her with utmost loathing as she watched the pirate dab Hawke's wound. The cut was a lot deeper than it originally seemed. Not surprising considering the size of the pirate's gold buckles.

"So you need help getting it?" Lana predicted, her eyes closed as Isabela tended to her head.

"_Please,_ Hawke!," the pirate begged. Hawke has never heard her so desperate before. "If you help me get it Castillon won't kill me."

"I'm trying to keep the entire city from rioting against the Qunari and you're worried about _this_?" Aveline spat disgustedly. Isabela hesitated.

"Well...maybe it's connected..."

Hawke opened her eyes then. She reached up and grabbed Isabela's outstretched arm, lowering it, preventing her from continuing.

"What do you mean?" she asked suspiciously. Isabela sighed and began to fidget with the bloodstained cloth in her hand, avoiding Lana's eyes. _Oh bugger!_

"I just mean...maybe it will help. It's important to someone, right?" she replied vaguely.

"_Now _you start being responsible?" Aveline blurted out, "Shit!"

Lana stared at Isabela's worried face. There was genuine fear there. The woman desperately wanted this Castillon off her back. _And I'm the only one who can help her. _Hawke thought for a minute. By the sounds of it, Aveline was passing off more guard duty onto her. And look what happened last time she did that. What did Hawke care if the Arishok was hiding fugitives? Isabela was her friend...and more. And she was in danger. Lana could only see one way forward.

"The relic issue must be resolved before we take on the Qunari," she said finally. Isabela looked up in shock. She hadn't expected Lana to accept, seeing as Aveline's problem affected more than just her. The Guardswoman groaned. She had a feeling this would happen. Isabela had been a thorn in her side from day one.

"You trust her this much?" Aveline asked Hawke. Isabela chuckled.

"Probably not...I wouldn't," she joked.

"The Qunari won't wait at the compound forever Hawke," Aveline said seriously, "I really do hope this helps because if it doesn't-"

"Relax Av, we'll get it done," Lana said firmly. The Guard Captain nodded then and made her way out of the Estate, leaving Isabela and Lana alone together for the first time since they slept with each other a few months back.

Since that last drink in The Hanged Man, Lana had purposefully made sure she was never in one-on-one situations with the pirate after all that had transpired between them. Their night together had been fun. But she didn't want to do it again, knowing the pirate wasn't interested in anything more than a meaningless fling. _I've had enough of those to last me a life time...Bethany's friends can atone to that. And my little sister was very popular back in Lothering._

"You're bleeding again," Isabela said, breaking the slightly awkward silence between them. She moved forwards again and continued to dab the blood which was running down Hawke's temple with the cloth. Lana gasped, feeling the cut sting.

"You hit like a girl," she teased, closing her eyes again. The Rivaini chuckled as she examined the cut.

"Really?" she asked sarcastically, "Is that why you're cringing like a little flower every time I touch the wound?"

"Well, you're not very good with your hands," Hawke joked. "I don't think you know how to be gentle."

All of a sudden she felt the pirate's soft lips on hers. They pressed together gently, a subtle hint of a tongue brushing against her bottom lip. After several stunned seconds, Hawke opened her eyes, just as Isabela finished kissing her.

"Was that gentle enough for you?" the Rivaini whispered seductively, her face hovering inches from Hawke's. Lana swallowed over the lump in her throat, overwhelmed by what had just transpired. After not spending much time with her during these past few moths, she had expected her feelings for Isabela to die. Instead it seemed to have the opposite effect. If anything, she liked her even more now. Isabela was so close Hawke could hear each of her deep breaths, feel each one breeze warmly against her face. That uncontrollable desire rose up from the pit of Lana's stomach once again, the one that appeared every time she gazed into the pirate's smouldering amber eyes. Her own breath caught, surprised by the pirate's bold move.

After a moment to regain herself, Lana pulled back, averting her eyes from Isabela's.

"Wh-Um...Where exactly are we going to find this relic?" she asked, continuing on as though nothing had happened.

"The exchange is happening in a Lowtown Foundry, tonight," Isabela said, watching Hawke try to regain her composure. She had clearly caught her off guard. _Balls! Maybe that wasn't the best move, _the pirate said to herself. She had already presented Lana the opportunity to close the door on her feelings towards her back in The Hanged Man after their night together, and now, on a whim, she had just re-opened it again. _I couldn't help it! It was there for the taking. Hawke's just too damn attractive for her own good!_

"Then let's get going," Hawke continued, turning away from her. "We'll pick up Varric and Fenris on the way. "

Isabela sighed and nodded, following her out of the Estate while trying unsuccessfully not to stare at her ass.

* * *

Lana and her companions stopped outside the Foundry to catch their breaths having just been attacked by a few giant Qunari. Varric was examining Bianca for scratches, a concerned look on his face, while Fenris and Isabela looted the bodies.

"Well, if the Arishok asks why we killed his men, we'll just say...It was an accident," Lana joked, sheathing her blood-stained daggers on her back. Varric chuckled.

"I think the only accident that could take down these giants would have to be a natural disaster," he replied.

"Well, Hawke's death toll is approaching those kinds of results," Fenris added, as he pocketed some coin from the dead Qunari Sten at his feet. Varric and Hawke laughed. Isabela however remained silent. Lana looked at her suspiciously then. It wasn't like her to be this serious. _She never passes up an opportunity to giggle at my expense. _The pirate searched the dead bodies around them more thoroughly than usual, going over the same ones as Fenris as though looking or something in particular. The brooding elf, seemingly happy with his bounty walked back over to Varric and began a conversation. Lana, concerned now, approached Isabela as she leaned over the horned giant at her feet, searching the inseams of his loincloth.

"What's wrong?" Hawke asked, bending down beside her. Isabela ignored her. Lana reached out then and grabbed her arm, stopping her frantic search. "Tell me, Bela."

The pirate sighed. _Shit, I really didn't want to involve her in this. _Seeing now that she had to come clean, she decided to fill Lana in on the details she had purposefully left out.

"About the relic..." she began, "It...It belongs to the Qunari and...well, there's a small chance they want it back..."

"What!?" Lana exclaimed, making the others break from their conversation and stare at them both, "Do the Qunari look like the sharing type to you? Andraste's Ass, what are we going to do now?"

Isabela gave her an apologetic look. "I've always known what the relic is," she said, grimacing, "I just...didn't want to worry you."

Hawke released her arm and got to her feet, exhaling and running a hand through her hair. _Shit! Shit! Shit!_ She thought, pacing the alleyway, shaking her head in disbelief. _Oh, the Arishok is just going to love this! _

"And you didn't think to even tell me?" Lana demanded, turning back to Isabela. _Maybe Aveline was right about all of this. _Isabela got to her feet as well then and walked towards her.

"Look, the relic is a hand-written Qunari text by that philosopher of theirs...Kelan...Cousland...or whatever his name is," she said, "I stole it from them, then they followed me here to get it back. That's why I never entered the Qunari compound with you and...well, that's why the Qunari are still in Kirkwall."

"For a book?" Lana asked in disbelief, "You mean to tell me they stayed here for a book? I didn't take the giant, horn-headed brutes for big readers...thought they were too busy ripping off people's heads."

Isabela chuckled, "They take their reading very seriously," she joked.

Lana rolled her eyes, calming down slightly, "Is there anything they don't take seriously?" she asked sarcastically. All four of them chuckled. "So what are were going to do?"

"Look," Isabela began, serious once more, "The book's right in this building and I'm not letting it slip away again."

"But this could solve, Aveline's problem," Hawke said. Isabela moved closer to her then, grabbing both her arms, trying to make her listen.

"Please, Hawke," she said desperately, staring deeply into her eyes, "If you feel anything for me...This is the only thing which will get Castillon off my back!"

Lana's jaw clenched. She tried to look anywhere except Isabela's face, which was right in front of hers. The Rivaini was clinging to her frantically. She had never seen her look so worried before. _She lied to me, _Lana thought angrily, _and now she wants me to rob the damn Qunari?_ Aveline's face appeared in her mind then. _This relic could stop the Qunari from rising up against the city._ Finally, Lana allowed herself to look at Isabela. The woman was staring at her expectantly. As soon as their eyes met, Hawke realised she couldn't refuse her if she tried.

"Oh shit!" she exclaimed, "Fine! We'll get the relic for you...Your life depends on it. I guess the Qunari will just have to wait a bit longer."

"Thank you!" Isabela said with relief, smiling at her. "It's nice to have someone on my side for a change."

"Don't make me regret it," Lana answered sourly. Isabela touched her cheek affectionately, without replying. They turned and made their way inside the Foundry. Hawke watched her go, wondering if she'd just made a really big mistake.

* * *

Inside, the air was damp and restricting, as though they weren't the only one's here.

"What now?" Hawke whispered, searching through the semi-darkness for any signs of movement.

"Now, we wait," Isabela whispered back, "Let's hide behind these crates until the buggers arrive. I want to find out who Sam's been dealing with."

Varric and Fenris took up a position on the left-hand side of the door, while Isabela and Hawke ducked in behind crates on the right. The space was very small, causing them to squash together, closer than either would have liked. As if things weren't awkward enough between them. Lana felt herself go crazy with desire as she felt the shape of Isabela's breast against her arm. The four of them stayed silent for several minutes, on either side of the door, unmoving, waiting to ambush Wall-Eyed Sam and whoever he was selling the relic to. The only sound was both women's breaths as they sat together, pressed against each other in the tight space.

"Why didn't you tell me about the relic, Bela?" Hawke whispered, breaking the deafening silence between them.

"I already told you," the pirate replied quietly, "I didn't want to worry you."

Isabela shifted her position slightly, feeling her bare leg brush against Lana's hand, making her quiver. _Damn, she smells so good, _she thought to herself, as Hawke's gorgeous scent wafted under her nostrils. It was killing her being this close and trying to control herself. Every nerve in her body wanted to relive that night they had spent together back in her room in The Hanged Man.

"Don't give me that bullshit," Lana whispered back, "Do you not trust me?"

Isabela hesitated. She didn't trust anyone. Trust was for the weak. "Do you trust me?" she countered, saving herself from answering. She felt Hawke heave a sigh beside her. It was several seconds before she answered.

"Yes," Lana breathed.

Her words filled Isabela up with guilt. _She does? _She was glad the lighting of the Foundry was dim and that Hawke couldn't see her face. _I was right, _the pirate thought to herself, _she's too good for me._ "I haven't given you a reason to," she whispered back, surprised by how much faith the woman had in her.

"You don't have to," Hawke replied gently. Isabela's breath caught.

"Why not?" she asked, her heart beating rapidly.

Lana swallowed over the lump in her throat. She was unable to hold it in any longer. It had been eating away at her for months.

"Because I love you," she whispered back.

Isabela's heart stopped. She turned to face Hawke in the darkness, her mouth falling open. _What? _Before she could respond, the door to the Foundry opened and a skinny man entered, followed by a crowd of what looked like mages. Isabela directed her attention towards them then, distracted momentarily by what had just transpired.

"Where's the relic?" a woman demanded roughly, staring at the nervous looking man before her.

The small, old, battered-looking thief shifted uncomfortably.

"I..eh...I have it," he answered, his voice shaking, eyes darting back and forth from the balconies of the Foundry.

Suddenly Qunari appeared out of nowhere, surrounding them from above.

"The Tomb of Koslun will not fall into Trevinter hands! Atash Qunari!"

Fighting broke out at once, flashes of light and spear flying through the air and ricocheting off the walls of the building around them. Wall-Eyed Sam turned on his heel, racing out of the Foundry as fast as his legs would take him. Isabela jumped up out of their hiding place and rushed after him, without looking back.

"He's getting away!" she yelled, chasing him out the door.

"ISABELA!" Lana shouted jumping up as well. Suddenly a bolt of lightening flashed past her head. She turned on time to see another heading her direction. Fenris bounded out from behind the crates and knocked her to the side forcefully, both of them landing on the ground. Varric began to shoot his bolts at the offending mages as the elf helped Hawke back to her feet. The three of them continued to fight off both the Qunari and the Trevinter mages until eventually the only people left alive inside the Foundry was them.

"Great Ancestors!" Varric exclaimed, catching his breath. The three of them were covered in blood. "Wasn't expecting that!"

"Let's go!" Lana yelled, running towards the door as fast as she could. Isabela had gotten a head start on them. The other two followed her back out of the Foundry and in to the night.

As soon as they set foot outside, Hawke almost tripped over a body lying on the ground. Fenris reached out to steady her and the three of them looked down. It was Wall-Eyed Sam. Lana reached down and searched his body. The relic was gone. Suddenly her hands closed round a piece of paper. Lana pulled it out of his pocket and unfolded it. It was a letter.

_Dear Hawke, _

_I have the relic and I'm gone .I'm sorry it had to be this way. I know you would have kept your end of the bargain and given it to me. You were a loyal ally...and more, but this is best for use both. I've already dragged you too far into this mess and I can't let you fight Castillon for me. It wasn't fair of me to use you that way. This wasn't exactly how I'd imagined saying goodbye, especially after everything that has happened between us, but I can't string you along anymore. _

_I don't expect you to forgive me, but I hope you understand._

_Isabela_

As Hawke read the words her heart dropped. She stared at the pirate's hastily written words, her jaw tightening. _She had been playing me from the very beginning. _Lana felt like a fool for trusting her. _Why did I have to fall in love with her? _Everyone had warned her that this would happen, but she was blinded by her feelings for the pirate, too busy flirting with Isabela to realise the danger she posed. And now she was gone, leaving Lana to clean up another mess she had left behind. Hawke scrupled the letter up in her hand, closing her fist around it angrily. She was furious with herself. She had let her guard down and basically handed the Rivaini all the munitions she needed to hurt her. _I guess Isabela screws people in a whole manner of ways, _she thought to herself bitterly.

Fenris and Varric, who had read over her shoulder, stared at her sympathetically.

"Hawke..." Varric began sadly, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. Lana shook him off and got to her feet. She dropped the letter to the ground and shook her head in disbelief. _How could I have been so stupid? _Realising the size of the mess they were now in without the relic, Lana pulled herself together as best she could.

"Come on," she said to the others, heading towards the Qunari compound, "We're about to have a full-scale war on our hands now."


	21. Chapter 21

"Hawke! Where in the Maker's name have you been?" a harassed-looking Aveline demanded angrily, as Lana, Fenris and Varric arrived outside the Qunari compound. She was standing with two of her guard. "I've been waiting here for ages. Did you get it?"

Hawke's companions shifted uncomfortably and averted their eyes. Neither of them wanted to be in Lana's shoes right now. They knew she was about to get slated by the Guardswoman. Lana took a deep breath. _I'm going to be treated to the lecture of a lifetime. Thank you very much, Isabela!_

"It's gone," she replied guiltily, "...and so is Isabela."

Aveline's eyes almost popped out of her head. "_WHAT!?"_ she yelled loudly, her voice echoing off nearby buildings, "You mean to tell me you left that pirate whore escape with the only damn thing which could save this city!?"

"I didn't _let _her escape!" Hawke shouted back, "The bitch played me...she'd _been_ playing me from the very beginning..."

Aveline shook her head and ran a hand through her red hair, beginning to pace up and down, "I told you this would happen!" she spat, turning back to Hawke, "I _told _you from the start! But all you saw was tits and ass. How could you be so-"

"I KNOW ALRIGHT!" Hawke interrupted angrily. This already hurt enough without Aveline's insults. The only person she had ever loved had stabbed her in the back and basically left her for dead. For that's what she would be when the Qunari rose up against Kirkwall. Everyone would look to her to save them and there was no effing way she was going to fight that ox-headed, beast of an Arishok. He'd tear her apart and eat her for breakfast. "I'm just another stupid wench who slept with Isabela and then got screwed in every way possible, can we leave it at that!?"

Steam was flowing from Aveline's ears now. "YOU SLEPT WITH HER!?" she screamed hysterically. Lana cursed loudly at her revelation. It had just slipped out. No one had known about her hot, steamy night with the pirate. She felt the questioning eyes of Varric and Fenris on her as Aveline had an aneurism. _Andraste's knickers, this day just gets worse and worse! _

"Yes," she replied, through gritted teeth, cringing, "We had sex...a few months back..."

"ARE YOU _COMPLETELY_ INSANE!?" Aveline asked, her voice more high-pitched than Lana had ever believed it could be. Hawke groaned, feeling her own temper flare now.

"Oh, all right, Av! Take it down a peg, only cats can hear you now!" she yelled back, disliking being told off by the prudish Guardswoman. "I made a bloody mistake, I get it! I don't need you making me deaf as well."

Aveline looked ready to explode. "Ohhhh don't you dare make jokes now, Lana Hawke! You're going to march into this complex with me and tell that damn Arishok what happened to his stupid relic in exchange for those fugitives!"

Hawke squared up to the Guardswoman. "That is the last time," she growled, pointing a wagging finger at Aveline's face, "that you will _ever..._call me by my first name!"

Varric and Fenris burst out laughing at Hawke's joke as Aveline lost her patience. In any argument it was only a matter of time before Lana's humour came out. She wasn't good at being serious for long. Aveline was pushed to far today though. She grabbed Lana roughly by the ear and dragged her up to the gate of the Qunari complex, the others following behind, sniggering. Only when they were inside did Aveline let Hawke go. Lana turned and glared at her, rubbing her ear. _Bitch, that bloody well hurt!_

The four of them and the two Guardsmen walked up to the steps, a top of which the Arishok stood, balancing a large axe on his shoulder, surrounded by his heavily armed Beresaad. He eyed Hawke respectfully as she approached, flexing his muscles. Lana had already had numerous dealings with him before and he seemed not to detest her as much as the other people of Kirkwall.

"Serah Hawke," he greeted her in his deep voice, walking down the steps towards them, "Shanedan."

"Greetings, Arishok," Aveline said, as Lana bowed her head respectfully. The Arishok eyed the Guard Captain with dislike, "We come regarding the elven fugitives that took refuge here."

"Irrelevant," the Arishok said firmly, "I would speak to Hawke about the relic stolen from my grasp."

Hawke cursed Isabela once more. _I can't believe she did this to me. We'll be lucky to get out of this alive. _She might have known that the Arishok already knew about them murdering his men.

"Your relic could be anywhere," Lana replied carefully, feeling unwilling to comply. Aveline whacked her on the arm.

"Why are you still protecting that slattern?" she hissed angrily at Hawke. Lana glared at her, rubbing her arm.

"I speak the truth," she replied bitterly, turning back to the Arishok defiantly. Even though Isabela had wronged her, she couldn't sell her out. It wasn't in her nature.

"Indeed," the Arishok agreed, "But you minimise your role."

"An issue for another time," Aveline interrupted, bringing them back on track, "We're here for the fugitives."

"The elves are now Viddathari. They have chosen to submit to the Qun. They will be protected," the Arishok informed them threateningly.

"Oh, how lovely, we'll just be on our way then. Byeee" Lana said lightly, turning around. Aveline grabbed her by the arm and pulled her back.

"_Don't you dare!_" she admonished, veins popping out of her head. Lana shook out of her grasp and sighed angrily. She hated the Guardswoman treating her like a child. This was all more trouble than it was worth. _I'm a bloody fugitive. Why am I here trying to bring others to justice?_

"Let us see your dangerous criminals," the Arishok said, gesturing to his right, "Speak Viddathari, whom did you kill and why?"

Lana and her companions turned in shock to see two skinny little elves walking towards them. _This has to be a joke,_ Lana thought to herself. The taller one spoke in a squeaky little voice.

"A city guard forced himself on our sister," he said to Aveline, ""We reported him...or rather, tried to. But they did nothing about it, so my brothers and I paid him a visit."

"Is this true, Aveline?" Hawke asked, disgusted. If someone had even touched a hair on Bethany's head she would have them castrated. And this sounded a lot more disturbing. The Guard Captain looked shifty.

"There have been...rumours," she admitted, "I will investigate. But that still doesn't allow them to take the law into their own hands."

"Sometimes it is necessary," the Arishok countered.

"I agree," Lana admitted, feeling sorry for the little elves. Her hatred for the City Guard was increasing even more now. _What are these assholes doing all day, standing around scratching their arses?_

"Hawke! You're not helping!" Aveline said angrily.

"You didn't bring me to help," Lana joked with a smirk, "You brought me for shits and giggles, remember?"

"Are you ever going to grow up!?" Aveline scolded, rolling her eyes.

"That depends," Lana replied, serious now, "Are the City Guard ever going to start doing their jobs instead of letting people be murdered by necromancers or raping the very citizens they're supposed to be protecting?"

"That's not fair!" Aveline shouted.

"Isn't it?" Hawke countered.

"The Viddathari will submit to the Qun and find a path your way has denied them," the Arishok declared, breaking up the argument.

"You can't just decide that!" Aveline admonished, turning back to him, "You must hand them over."

The Arishok glared at her and began to pace. He was like a charging ox-man at the minute, ready to unleash his dominance over Kirkwall and kill them all. _How do I get myself into these messes? _Lana asked herself, _I'm a good person...well, sort of. And now I'm about to decorate the axe of this Arishok in a pretty smear._

"Tell me, Hawke," he said, turning to Lana, "What would you do, in my place?"

All eyes stared at Hawke. _Oh shit! Why is it always me? _With one glaring look from Aveline, as though trying to imprint a message in her brain, Lana stepped forward, shitting herself.

"As a guest in this city," she replied reluctantly, "I would keep the peace and hand them over." _Even though I would have done the same in their place...Oh, I feel like such a hypocrite. _Aveline seemed satisfied with her answer. She turned back to the Arishok as though that settled it.

"I see..." he replied, staring at her. He knew she wasn't telling the truth. "I cannot leave without the relic, but I also cannot sit by and remain blind to this dysfunction...I see only one solution now."

Aveline's face fell, "Arishok, there's no need-"

The giant beast held up his hand, silencing her. He turned and walked back up the steps.

"Vinek kathas," he growled at his men, without looking back.

At once, the Beresaad sprung to life. Numerous spears flew through the air towards them all. The two guardsmen collapsed to the ground beside them, pierced by the flying weapons. Hawke took out her dagger just in time to parry one away that was aimed at her heart. She turned and stabbed the nearest Qunari giant with her blade, seeing his blood spurt out, and watched as he feel to the ground at her feet.

"Not here!" Aveline shouted, grabbing her shoulder and backing away with the others. "Hawke, move!" Lana took one last glance up at the Arishok. He was staring down at her, as though silently declaring a challenge. Hawke cursed inwardly. _Great, I'm not going to make it through this day. Say goodbye to your head, Lana. _She felt Aveline drag her back towards the exit and what remained of them ran down the steps (dodging numerous spears and javelins being thrown after them) and back into Lowtown. The inevitable war had just begun, and Lana knew it would be down to her to finish it.

* * *

Isabela jumped over a large rock and landed roughly on the other side. She had been walking for a few hours now, a large tome under her arm, Kirkwall left well behind her. _What do the Qunari even want this for? _she wondered, glancing down at the cover of the old book, _Koslun was a crack-pot old fool. It's full of mind-washing bullshit. If anything I'm doing them a favour by stealing it from them. _The pirate heaved the tome up once more, maintaining her sweaty grip on it. The sooner she gave this to Castillon the better. _And then that bastard can go finger himself. I'm done with him. _She walked a little faster then, wanting this to be over and done with. It had hung over her head for too long.

As Isabela made her way along the dusty, debris-littered path to Ostwick, her mind fell on Hawke. She had been fighting thoughts of the woman since she had left Kirkwall, hating the guilty feeling which came with it. Although she knew Lana had feelings for her already, it was the first time the woman had just came out and said it straight: I love you. Three simple words which Isabela had been afraid of her entire life. The pirate was still shocked by Hawke's words. Lana had purposefully distanced herself from her since their night together in The Hanged Man, all those months ago. _And what a night it was! _Isabela still had wet dreams about it. Hawke was well worth the wait, and then some. _As I had a feeling she would be._ She looked down at the numerous tiny scars on the back of her hands, made by the glass they were rolling around in that night. Hawke could give as good as she got.

A horrible sensation of guilt overcame Isabela once more as she thought about what she had done. _What was I supposed to do though? Let Castillon kill me? I had to take the damn relic...__**You should have been honest with her from the start...**__Oh, come on, honesty isn't my policy. I'm all bout deceit and lies...__**Only with people you don't care about...**__Please, it's no big deal, I screw over everyone... __**Even someone you love?...**_

Isabela stopped dead then. _I love her? _She considered this then. Suddenly the pirate realised it was a possibility. Maybe that's why she was feeling guilty. _But I can't be in love, love isn't for me...__**How long are you going to keep telling yourself that for?...**_The pirate felt breathless then. She had feeling for Hawke, but they were only sexual right? She clutched her chest then, this idea of something more weighing down on her heart, and walked to a nearby rock, which littered the sides of the roads. The pirate sat herself down, overwhelmed by the revelation in her head. _I don't love Hawke...__**Yes, you do**__...No, I don't. _

As Isabela wrestled with her conscience, she realised then that it was the truth. This was the real reason she was running away. It had nothing to do with Castillon. She could easily kill that son of a bitch with her eyes closed. That guilty feeling took over her once more. She had left Hawke with little more than a hastily-written letter for company, straight after the woman had declared her love for her. And now Lana would have to fight the damned Qunari for her as well. _Either that or she'll send them after me. _Even as the pirate said the words she knew Lana would never do that to her. The woman was loyal to her friends. It was one of the main differences between her and the pirate. _I do trust her, _Isabela realised then.

The Rivaini sighed and got back to her feet. She had to get going. Castillon was waiting for her at the meeting place. If she didn't get there on time he'd probably send someone after her and she could do without an arrow in the back. The pirate began walking towards Ostwick again, her arm becoming weak under the strain of the tome. Hawke's face appeared in her mind once more. _Forget about her, she's just someone you love._

Suddenly Isabela stopped walking. _Someone I love._..._Some I..._

"I love her," she said out loud. She felt a strange sense of release. "I ...love her?" she repeated. She looked up then, as though just realising then where she was and what she was about to do. "Andraste's tits, what am I doing?" she asked herself.

The Rivaini turned on her heel at once and began to sprint back towards Kirkwall, the relic stored firmly under her arm. She had to get there before anything bad happened. The Qunari were sure to rise up against the city. But it wasn't the city she cared about. Hawke would no doubt be in the middle of it. The woman was a magnet for trouble. _That's how she met me._ The Arishok was a giant beast of a thing. Lana was a skilled rogue, but against such a brute even she would have difficulty. _Oh balls! What if something happens to her? It's my fault! My damn fault!_

The pirate ran faster then, ignoring the burning pain in her arms and legs. There was no way she was letting Lana take the fall for this.

"I love her," she said out loud again, unable to believe it herself. She felt positively giddy. Just uttering the words seemed to give her the strength to carry on under all the strain. Hawke's face burned in her mind again. Isabela had finally fallen in love with her. She could finally admit it to herself. There was no way she was going to lose her now.

* * *

"Varric's out!" Hawke yelled, trying to dodge the spear of the giant Qunari Sten who was determined to stick her with it. She had just noticed the dwarf fall to the ground in a heap on top of his beloved Bianca. She parried to the side and thrust her tiny dagger in between the beast's ribcage all the way up to the hilt, feeling it tear at flesh and bone. The Qunari collapsed onto her, knocking her off-balance. The beast's corpse landed on her roughly, taking the wind from her where she lay trapped under its weight in the middle of the street in Lowtown.

The entire city of Kirkwall was aflame, buildings turned to rubble in the smoky mess. Men and women alike were running for their lives, screaming as the Qunari Beresaad dragged people off to the Viscount's Keep. It had taken little more than a few hours for the Arishok to gain a strong foothold in the city, as Hawke and all of her companions attempted to stop the wreck and ruin of the population around them. This time Hawke had some assistance though. _Thank The Maker, I'm tired of doing all of this on my own. A whole damn City Guard and Templar Army and I get stuck wiping people's asses._

Lana pushed the giant beast off her to find Aveline standing over her.

"You're not making your death my fault," the Guardswomen said, her hand outstretched. "Not today!"

Hawke smiled and accepted the Guardswoman's help, getting pulled to her feet by the strong arms of the Iron Lady. _I really need to stop calling her that. One of these days I'm going to say it out loud. _Lana clutched her side, her ribs feeling very tender after the sheer weight which had fallen on her. _Maker, what do they feed those things?_

"Who were those men fighting with us?" she asked, watching them run off into the distance.

"Grey Wardens," Aveline replied, "Maker knows what they were doing here. They aren't supposed to involve themselves in political struggles."

"Well, I won't turn away their help," Lana said, shrugging. The two women rushed over to Varric then, where Anders was trying to revive him.

"Will he be alright?" Hawke asked the mage. There was still a lot of bitterness between them, but in a life or death situation, old grudges must be put aside for them to have any chance of survival.

"He's fine," Anders answered, "Just knocked out."

With one simple spell, the dwarf came to and got to his feet. Taking one look at the mage's face, he groaned.

"I knew I wasn't dead," he said, eyeing Anders with dislike, "There would be _more _women around...and none of them would be blonde."

Hawke laughed and patted his shoulder, receiving a friendly smile in return. Any joke at Anders' expense gave her satisfaction. _Ok, maybe I haven't put all my grudges aside. The bastard sold out my sister! _Anders rolled his eyes. He was getting tired of people being condescending towards him, especially after he just helped, but this was no time for an argument. He realised he had a lot of making up to do to Hawke. The fact that he was still breathing made him count himself lucky.

"I need a drink," Fenris grumped.

"Me too," Lana agreed, "Ever hear than saying 'I'd kill for a pint'? Well, we might just have to. That Arishok needs to die...Bastard, I thought we were friends."

Fenris, Varric and Merrill laughed at Lana's sarcastic tone.

"Oh, is that all we have to do?" Varric joked, "Kill the Arishok? We'll be back at The Hanged Man by supper then. First round's on me!"

More laughter filled the air as the Hawke and her companions continued onwards into Hightown.

It wasn't long before they ran into another section of the Beresaad. The fighting broke out in the main square, scattering the companions all around in private battles. Lana found herself fighting three Qunari at once. She couldn't help but think how easy it still would be, compared to fighting the Arishok. The only thing she would have on her side against him was speed and agility. _That's clearly causing these bastards trouble, _she thought to herself as she dodged every giant swing which came towards her. She slashed the nearest Qunari's throat with the dagger in her left hand before lunging forwards with her right in a killer combination, catching the second on off guard. The blood-soaked blade cut across his chest and he toppled over. Now there was only one left. A Saarebas. This was going to be a lot trickier.

Suddenly a giant sword flew through the air came out of nowhere, catching the remaining Qunari square in the back. His giant body collapsed, jerking around a though an electric current was travelling through his corpse. Lana looked up surprised. A heavily armed woman in silver armour and a red hood was standing before her.

"That one still counts as mine," Hawke joked, withdrawing the sword from the giant and tossing it to the woman. She caught it skilfully and placed it on her back.

"I am Knight-Commander Meredith," she replied, "And that kill is very much mine."

Lana gritted her teeth. _A Templar, _she thought bitterly, _and not just any Templar. She's the Queen bitch! _

"Don't you just prefer to kill mages?" Lana asked sarcastically.

"Funny," Meredith replied sternly, "You might even make the Arishok die of laughter the rate you're going."

Hawke snorted. "Well, I intend to try," she said, "Because I have no desire to fight that big bastard one-on-one."

"Do not underestimate yourself, Serah Hawke. You may not have a choice," Meredith warned. "They are bringing the nobles to the Keep. I will need your help to stop this."

"They've got all the important people in the one place to avoid a power struggle," Aveline realised, "It won't be long before they have complete control."

"I will scout out up ahead," Meredith said, turning away, "Good luck."

"WAIT!" Hawke called after her. The Knight-Commander turned back. "How do you know my name?"

"How could I not after you killed one of my men trying to save your apostate sister? I don't forget, Hawke. Your friend here pulled strings to get you out of it, but you will answer." Meredith replied, frowning, "Your name has crossed my desk many a time...Too many! I know what you are capable of, Serah. Suffice if to say that your sister is running free in the city as we speak. How long can she and Orsino hold out against Qunari brutality I wonder, now that her 'heroine' has arrived?"

"Where is she!?" Lana demanded, feeling truly scared for the first time since the uprising began.

"Near the Keep I imagine," Meredith replied uncaring, "She and First Enchanter Orsino led the mage charge against these beasts. You might still catch them on time."

Hawke pushed past the Knight-Commander at once and sprinted in the direction of the Keep. _Oh Bethany, why do you do this to me? Why? _Didn't her sister know when she put herself in danger, she worried frantically about her? It had been almost four years since she had seen her little sister. _Maker, has it really been that long? _Bethany hadn't replied to any of her letters since she heard of their mother's murder. But Hawke didn't have time to think about that now. She didn't have time to be nervous. Bethany needed her. Mages couldn't hold out against the strength of the Beresaad for long!

"Hawke, wait!" Varric called from behind her. He had seen her frenzy all those years ago as Hawke cut down Templar recruits to save her sister when they captured her. There was no Isabela to hold her back now. She would kill any poor sod that stood in the way of her protecting her family (or what remained of it.)

As soon as Hawke and her companions reached the grounds of the Keep they were surrounded by Qunari. The air was filled with war cries and the sound of iron on steel as the two sides collided. The ground was scattered with dead mages. _Any one of them could be Bethany! _ Lana relished the pain she inflicted on the Sten before her, his brute strength no match for her new-found frenzy. It wasn't long before her dagger was fixed firmly in heart and the others fell dead beside him. Eventually the battle was over.

Suddenly someone groaned nearby. Hawke tip-toed over the numerous bodies at her feet and reached out a hand, helping an elven mage in a purple robe to his feet. He seemed to be the only one still alive, a little dazed though. Lana noticed a First Enchanter's ring on his finger. He must be Orsino

"Thank you my friend," he said, groaning as he got to his feet.

"You're Orsino right?" Hawke blurted out, "Where is my sister?"

"I...I don't know who you're...Surely they cannot all be dead," he said looking around at the lifeless forms of the mages around them. Suddenly his eyes caught a woman in blue robes. He ran towards her worriedly. Lana followed after him. A horrible sense of recognition hit her then.

"BETHANY!" she exclaimed, pushing Orsino out of the way and dropping to her knees beside her little sister. She was unconscious, blood pouring from a gash on her head. Lana checked her pulse. She was still alive. "HELP HER!" she shouted at the First Enchanter. Orsino held out his hand and used the same revival spell which Anders had used on Varric earlier. Suddenly Bethany began to stir.

"What were you thinking, child?" Orsino asked, staring down at her, "I told you to let them take me."

Bethany groaned, "I had to do something. We couldn't just..." he voice trailed off as she set eyes on her older sister for the first time in four years. Lana swallowed hard. There was no warmth in her sister's features, not like how she remembered them.

"I...I'm glad you're safe," Lana said gently, feeling slightly cautious. Bethany didn't soften.

"The city is under attack," she replied bitterly, giving her sister a stern look, "None of us are safe."

"First Enchanter Orsino, you survive."

Knight-Commander Meredith and a few of her Templars interrupted the awkward moment between Lana and Bethany and began talking to Orsino. Hawke reached out a hand to help her little sister to her feet. Bethany ignored it.

"Bethany..." Lana began, reaching out and placing a hand on her arm as she went to walk away. Bethany glared at her.

"You can't fix this, Lana," she replied sadly, shaking her head, "There's no point in trying..."

She shook out of her sister's touch and turned her back on her. Hawke followed after her and grabbed her again.

"Wait!" she pled, her face falling, "I don't understand..."

She saw tears fill in Bethany's eyes as her sister looked back at her. "Mother..."she said simply. Lana felt as though someone had winded her. She saw the unforgiving look on her sister's face and her hand dropped limply to her side. Bethany stared at her for several seconds before shaking her head and turning back to the ongoing conversation between the mages and Templars. Hawke's companions stared from Bethany to Lana, shocked at what had just happened. Four years ago they would have been inseparable, before all this business with the mages and with Leandra kicked in. Now though, Bethany had spoken to her older sister as though she was a stranger. There was no warmth there anymore. Varric stared at Hawke sympathetically. Only he and Isabela had properly seen the agony Hawke went through after Bethany was taken by the Templars all those years ago. It hurt him a little to see how the once close relationship between Lana and Bethany had soured over the years. Remembering the danger they were still in, Hawke straightened up then, pushing the pain to the back of her mind and wearing her usual mask of deception. She would figure this out later. She rejoined the battle plans with the others.

"There is no time to talk," Meredith declared, "We must strike back before it's too late."

"And who will lead us in this fight?" Orsino asked bitterly, "You?"

"I will fight to defend this city as I have always done, Orsino!" Meredith argued back. Orsino moved closer then.

"To control it you mean!" he yelled, his temper flaring. "I won't have our lives tossed to the flames to feed your vanity!"

"Stop this!" Lana interjected, coming between the Knight-Commander and the First Enchanter. "I won't have you two at each others throats. I'm in charge."

"_You?" _Meredith spat, "you're not even from this city."

"Neither am I?" Orsino said, "Yet I don't hear you complaining about us both fighting to defend our homes."

Meredith glowered at them both. "Very well, then," she relented.

"Why am I not surprised?" Bethany said bitterly, staring at her sister. It hurt Lana to see the anger in his sisters eyes.

"Bethany..." Lana said softly, shaking her head, "I..."

Bethany averted her eyes, her jaw clenched. Hawke couldn't believe what had become of them now. She hadn't seen her sister in four years. She missed her everyday. The bandana Bethany had given her all those years ago before their Deep Roads expedition was wrapped around Lana's neck still, under her amour, along with their mother's locket which she had found in the foundry where Leandra had died. Hawke loved her sister more than anything in this world. This wasn't how she imagined their reunion to be. She felt like someone had reached inside her and torn her heart to pieces. Her sister's bitterness towards her hurt even more than when their mother had died. Bethany was the only thing that had kept her going all these years. And now she had lost that.

"What ever you plan be quick about it," Meredith interjected, "That's if you _can_ plan something without a joke escaping your lips. Otherwise we'll be here all day."

Lana sighed and turned back to the Knight-Commander. "Let's get to the Keep," she ordered, ignoring the woman's jibes. She'd had enough of this day already. "We can figure out what's going on and plan accordingly."

"An excellent idea," Orsino said.

"Let us move quickly," Meredith added, rallying her men and women.

Hawke led the way as her group of the most unlikely band of mercenaries made their way up the large staircase towards the Viscount's Keep. _I've managed to unite the mages and Templars under one banner...Shocking!_

* * *

Isabela panted harshly, trying to catch her breath. She doubled over, leaning on her legs as exhaustion overcame her. The Rivaini had been running for miles with the large tome under her arm. _Shit, Hawke better be up for some stress-relief when I get there. Otherwise this is just not worth the pain. _As much as she joked, the pirate knew that Lana was definitely worth every bead of sweat which dropped from her forehead as she ran. Not wanting to linger further and waste more time, Isabela straightened up, eyeing the city of Kirkwall in the distance.

Her blood ran cold. The entire city was engulfed in flames. Screaming could be heard even from outside the city walls. Her worst fear had come true. The Qunari had attacked. _Oh bollocks! Hawke's definitely going to be in the think of it. _The pirate pulled out her dagger in her free hand and began to descend the hills surrounding Kirkwall. _I can't believe I'm doing this...__**It's the only way...**__What about Castillon?...__**The greasy bastard can bend himself over a barrel and let his ship's mast ram up his ass...**__Then I'll take it from him and sail away into paradise, knowing that the beautiful piece of wood at my helm screwed Castillon so hard to escape his clutches before I ever had to...__**Hmm, that metaphor kind of got away from me there... **_Isabela shook Castillon out of her mind and continued running towards Kirkwall. _It must be nerves, _she though. Time was of the essence. Castillon and his men could wait. They would die later, when this business with the Qunari was finished and Hawke was fixed firmly by her side.

* * *

Holding the growing pain in her ribs, Hawke stepped over the numerous Kareshok bodies at her feet and stumbled into the throne room of the Viscount's Keep, her companions at her flanks. Shouting and screaming could be heard from inside. Lana pushed open the doors and silence fell upon the crowded room. At the head of the pack stood the Arishok.

"Here is your Viscount!" he yelled, throwing something round and bloodied down into he crowd. Screaming filled the room once more. It was Viscount Dumar's head, severed from his body. The Viscount's blood-covered crown rolled off his head and streaked across the floor.

"You dare! You're starting a war," Emil Reinhardt shouted out. As Lana pushed her way through the crowd she heard the sickening snap of a neck breaking and Emil fell to the ground. People began to scream. Lana felt sick as she stared down in shock at the man who had once been promised to her. She wished she had gotten here sooner.

"Look at you," the Arishok growled, "Like fat Dathrasi you feed and feed, and complain only when your meal is interrupted! You do not look up, you do not see that the grass is bare. All you leave in your wake in misery! You are blind, I WILL MAKE YOU SEE!"

Lana stepped over the Viscount's head without a second glance and the crowed parted to let her pass then. There were numerous whisperings among the nobles who she recognised from that disastrous dinner party at her Estate. Some were spouting sympathy and regret at the death of Leandra while others were as condescending as ever, given her sexual orientation and how bluntly it had been unveiled with Isabela and her joined at the mouth, pressed up inappropriately against a bookshelf only to be interrupted by Hawke's mother. _Ah, good times, _Hawke joked to herself. She ignored them all and approached the intimidating ox-headed giant holding two of the biggest axes she had ever seen. She only had eyes for the Arishok now.

"It seems we have guests," the Arishok declared, beginning to descend the steps, "Shanedan Hawke, I expected you. Maraas toh ebra-shok. You alone are Basalit-an." He turned to the surrounding nobles, staring at them with disgust. "This is what respect looks like, Bas! Some of you will never earn it."

"Yeah, some of these people wouldn't know respect if I tied them up and spanked them with it," Lana joked, following the Arishok's disgusted glare. He turned back to her then.

"So tell me Hawke, you know I am denied Par Vollen until the Tome of Koslun is found. How would you see this conflict resolved without it?"

Suddenly there was noise behind them. One of the Kareshok fell face down in a heap of blood and a giant boot stepped over him.

"I believe I can answer that."

Hawke turned her head in shock, never thinking she would hear that teasing voice ever again. There, standing before her, the Tome of Koslun under her arm, was a rather sweaty looking Isabela.


	22. Chapter 22

"Isabela..."

The pirate smiled that familiar, cheeky smirk that Hawke had come to associate with her, as she climbed over the dead Qunari warrior at her feet and made her way towards Lana and the Arishok. Hawke had never been happier to see her, and had never been as angry at her since the years she had known her. There was something different in the Rivaini's eyes though as she stared at her. _Fear? The Arishok's a big, ugly-looking brute, _Lana thought to herself, o_r maybe its guilt? She did stab me in the back after I agreed to help her. _Whispering broke out among the surrounding nobles and Hawke's companions as Isabela entered the middle of the large circle of people who had formed round Lana and the Qunari leader.

"Sorry I'm late," she said calmly, to stunned crowd, as though they were all simply waiting to start dinner or something. "I would have gotten here sooner if not for all the fighting going on everywhere."

The pirate stopped in front of a furious looking Arishok. Apparently Isabela seemed to have that effect on everyone, though this time it was definitely warranted. She looked from the Qunari to Hawke, whose face was just as impassive. _What did I expect? A slobbering kiss of forgiveness?, _the Rivaini thought to herself, _I'm just surprised she hasn't hit me yet ._Taking a deep breath, Isabela turned back to the menacing Arishok and held out his beloved Tome of Koslun. He accepted, taking the book in his hands and examining the cover with reverence.

"I'm sure you'll find it mostly undamaged," she said, still smirking. She glanced at Hawke then, feeling pleased with herself. "And you thought you'd never see me again," she joked, her smile getting wider. Lana didn't flinch.

"Actually I hoped I wouldn't," she replied sourly before turning back to the Arishok. Isabela's smile faltered. Hawke's harsh words hurt her deeply. _Ok, maybe I deserved that, but still..._As the Arishok was distracted, Isabela leaned in closer to Lana, not wanting the rest of the crowd to hear their conversation.

"Look, Hawke-"

"Save it, Bela," Lana interrupted shaking her head bitterly. She turned to Isabela then."...Though I am curious as to why you're here. Shouldn't you be making sweet love to Castillon right about now? After all, we both know now that your little 'friendship' with him was worth far more than ours ever was."

"Oh, don't be like that," Isabela pled in an urgent whisper, "I was half way to Ostwick to meet him before I knew I had to turn back. Your damned influence is the reason I'm here, if you must know. I could have been away with that bloody relic, but now here I am, giving up my only chance of saving my own neck...It's pathetic."

Hawke snorted, "Heroic acts of sacrifice? What will people say?" she asked sarcastically. "Don't think you're getting into my good books that easily...Though I am glad you decided to return the Tome. At least now I won't have to fight this horn-headed maniac."

Isabela chuckled. "Well, in that case, you're welcome."

"I should bloody hope so," Hawke replied angrily. "Do you know what a day I've had because of you?" Isabela stopped laughing at once. She could tell she had a lot of making up to do, but this was the first time in her life that she was prepared to do it. She had run all the way here for this woman, and she hadn't done it half-heartedly.

The Arishok handed the Tome of Koslun to one of his Karashok. The nobles watched as the soldier took it carefully and bowed his horned head, before backing away from his leader. A collective wave of relief washed over them all as the Arishok turned to address Hawke once more.

"The Tome of Koslun has been recovered," he said in his deep, menacing voice, "I am now free to return to Par Vollen...with the thief."

Isabela almost shat herself. "What!?" she exclaimed, staring at him wide-eyed. She turned to Lana who looked just as shocked. Suddenly Aveline jumped in.

"Oh, no, no, no," she said loudly, "If anyone kicks that bitches ass, it's going to be me!"

The Arishok balanced one of his giant axes on his shoulder, "She stole the Tome of Koslun. She must return with us."

"Sounds like you have something very specific in mind," Hawke said, at hint of a joke in her tone.

"She will submit to the Qun and the Ben-Hassrath. More than that, I will not say," the Arishok answered.

"That sounds like a good punishment," Hawke replied. Isabela's mouth fell open.

"WHAT!?" she said, louder this time. She couldn't believe her ears. The woman she loved was about to hand her over to the Qunari?

"On the other hand," Hawke continued, after taking in her fair share of seeing Isabela look horrified, "As fun as that would be to see...You got what you came for and this pirate whore owes me a drink...or fifty. So I'm afraid she has to stay here."

Isabela exhaled with relief. _Maker's Breath, perfect time for a joke. I almost soiled my...Hey wait, I don't wear any underwear._ The Arishok's eyes narrowed.

"Rivaini, you might want to move a bit this way," Varric said worriedly.

"Then you leave me no choice," he said, staring at Lana who was beginning to sweat now, "I challenge you, Hawke. You and I will do battle to the death with her as the prize."

"What!? No!" Isabela shouted before Lana could respond. This hadn't gone at all the way she'd planned. She imagined the Qunari would leave and she would get to share a passionate kiss with Lana for saving the day, everything being forgiven. "If you're going to duel anyone, duel me!"

The Arishok looked at her in disgust. "You are not Basalit-An. You have proved yourself to be nothing more than a common thief. You are not worthy."

Hawke wiped the sweat from her brow. "Why not just leave?" she asked hopefully.

"We do not suffer thieves," the Arishok replied, turning back to her, "She cannot walk away from this insult."

_Oh shit! _Hawke's heart was beating so fast she wouldn't be surprised if that killed her before the Arishok could even raise an axe. She swallowed hard, glancing from Isabela's white face to the giant beast who was threatening to take her.

"If you object, duty demands we fight," the Arishok growled, with a deadly finality in his voice.

Hawke looked at Isabela once more. _I can't let him take her...__**She betrayed you...**__But, she came back...__**To save her own skin, not yours!...**__Oh, balls...__**Let her go, Lana...**__No...__**That bastard ox-man will kill you...**__But I love her...__**She doesn't deserve it, let him take her!...**__NO!_

"Alright," she agreed reluctantly, turning back to the Arishok, her jaw tightening. "Let's dance."

"MARAVAS! SO SHALL IT BE!" he yelled, swinging both axes in triumph. Lana couldn't help but notice how one of his arms was the same size as her body. _Holy Maker, he could crush my skull in one hand!_

The crowed backed away at once, including Hawke's companions. All except for Isabela. She grabbed Lana's arm.

"Hawke, don't do this!" she pled, "Please...not for me! I won't let you!"

Hawke shook out of her grasp and stared at her angrily. "You make the mess, Bela. I clean it up. That's how it's always been, right? That's the only reason you've been with me all these years," she said bitterly. Isabela could see the genuine hurt and fear in the woman's eyes. She had never felt so ashamed of herself for everything she had done to her. Hawke was the most loyal person she had ever known. _Maybe my being in love with her would never be enough._

"Not this time," Isabela replied, shaking her head, "It's too much..."

Hawke sighed, "Oh, don't worry your pretty little head, Precious... I'm used to it by now."

With one final shove, Lana pushed Isabela back towards the rest of the crowd, unable to look at her face anymore. The pirate struggled against Fenris and Aveline who had grabbed her, making sure she couldn't run off again or intervene. She had caused enough trouble as it was. _I can't ask her to do this for me!_ _It should be me fighting this duel!_

Hawke scanned the surrounding crowd, picking out Bethany's face. Her sister looked beside herself with worry. _I guess she doesn't totally hate me, _Lana thought to herself. The notion gave her a small amount of comfort as she withdrew her daggers and turned her gaze to the giant Qunari leader before her. Her weapons looked like nothing more than tiny, little toothpicks in comparison to the giant, double-sided axes the Arishok was swinging in either hand. They both began to circle the playing field then, the eyes of the crowd fixed firmly upon them, holding their breaths as they watched in shock and horror.

Suddenly, without warning, the Arishok charged. Lana had no time to react as the horn of the beast's head came soaring directly towards her. She felt the full force of the Arishok's weight as he knocked her back, lifting her completely off the ground and into the air. She felt his horn tear at her ribs, breaking open the skin in one excruciatingly painful movement.

Hawke landed on the ground hard, flat on her back a few feet away, hearing the cries from the surrounding crowd. _Well that wasn't a good start! _One of her daggers fell from her hand and slid across the floor. She looked down at her side to see it pouring with blood. Finding it difficult to breathe, she brought her arm across her midsection, covering the wound with right her hand. _I think he broke a few ribs. _Before Lana had time to stand, the Arishok was upon her once more. He slammed his axe down hard, forcing her to roll to the side to avoid it, the ground cracking to pieces behind her. He repeated the attack three more times, following Hawke as she rolled across the floor, before finally using that momentum to get back to her feet.

With her one remaining dagger, Hawke blocked the Arishok's swing, feeling the sheer brute force he was exerting. She dodged to the side then, her lightening-quick reflexes kicking in, and lunged with her dagger towards the Arishok as he made to collect his breath from his heavy swing. The tiny blade cut into his skin, barely making more than a scratch. The crowd cheered as they saw it connect. Lana knew that she would have to do more than that though.

Hawke backed away at once, still holding the pain in her side, as the Arishok made a wild, sweeping swing towards her, enraged that she had even got a hit in. _The only way I'm going to have a chance is if I flank him, _she thought to herself. Suddenly the Qunari charged again. This time Lana was ready though. She gracefully sidestepped the horned head as the giant flamed towards her faster than she had ever seen anything move. Without hesitating, Hawke stabbed the Arishok in the back with all the force she could muster. This time, she felt her blade sink a few inches into the think skin of the Qunari leader and heard him growl in fury.

The battle seemed to go on for hours as Lana slowly began to chip away at the Arishok's muscled body, using the same tactics of backstabbing him after her charged at her. By now her energy was almost gone and she was loosing blood rapidly from the gaping wound in her side. All of a sudden, the Arishok caught her unawares as she went to stab him for what seemed like the millionth time. His axe connected with her dagger, sheering it clean in half with a clang of metal on metal. The broken piece fell to the ground as though in slow motion, the eyes of every single person in the room on it. _Well, at least it's not my neck, _Lana joked. Just as the thought entered her head, the heavily armored shoulder of the Arishok caught her across the forehead as he lashed out empty-handed, in berserker rage, his axe having embedded itself in the floor. Lana hit the ground hard, dazed, a pain like she had never known gushing through her head. The room began to spin, the faces of the surrounding crowd blurring into one. She could hear her companions yell and scream at her to get to her feet, could make out Isabela calling her name frantically as the Arishok approached. But she had nothing left. Her strength had gone.

Hawke stared up, into the unforgiving eyes of the Arishok. She held her broken dagger in her sweaty grasp, trying to find one last bit of energy to raise it and defend herself. The Arishok's torso was dripping blood from the numerous stab wounds she had made, but it had done little to stop him, only slowing him down slightly. He smiled down at her, grabbing his remaining axe in both hands. Hawke watched as he raised it slowly over his head, knowing this moment was going to be her last.

With a cry of pain she raised herself off the blood-stained floor with a last-ditch attempt and thrust the jagged edge of her broken dagger into the stomach of the Arishok's unprotected body. The crowd fell silent as the Arishok's axe fell behind him and clattered to the ground loudly. He looked down in shock, seeing the broken dagger lodged in his midsection all the way up to the hilt. Lana held it tightly, twisting the blade in the wound with everything she had. The giant beast fell to his knees, blood beginning to pour from the corner of his mouth. He and Lana were now face to face. They stared painfully into each others eyes. Hawke gritted her teeth as she managed to manoeuvre herself onto her knees, continuing to push the dagger into his midsection. She could hear the ragged breaths of the Arishok as he clung to life.

"We...We will...return," he threatened hoarsely, "...One day..."

Lana shook her head, breathing heavily.

"But not today," she replied. With one final ounce of strength she pulled the broken dagger out of the Arishok and made a swift circular swipe in the air. The blade sliced through the think neck of the Arishok with one powerful, fluid motion and his horned head toppled to the ground. After several seconds of stunned silence, the headless body fell the floor in a heap...and so did Hawke.

The crowd of nobles erupted into cheers as the Beresaad moved out of the Keep, realising their master was defeated and they no longer had any purpose here. Hawke's companions ran towards her where she lay unconscious, none as fast as Isabela. The pirate bolted towards where she lay as fast as she could and fell to her knees beside her. _Don't be dead, _she thought, _Please don't be dead! _She slid a hand under Hawke's head, laying it on her knees gently.

"Someone get her healing magic!" the pirate shouted. _I'll not have anyone dying for me. _Bethany fought her way through the surrounding crowd and fell to her knees beside her older sister. She placed her hands over the horrible, gaping wound on Lana's side and began to knit her broken bones together with magic.

"Everybody get back!" Aveline shouted, ushering the crowd back away from the scene. Fenris, Anders and a few of the surrounding Templars began to force the crowd of people backwards a few paces to give Bethany more room to work. Everyone was staring down a Lana worriedly.

Isabela ran her hands through Lana's blood-matted hair, her hands shaking. _I can't believe she did that for me. I didn't deserve it after everything I've done._

"Anders, can you help?" Bethany asked, "The spell will be much more effective with two, and this is a big wound."

Anders dropped to his knees immediately and the entire Keep watched in anticipation as the two mages worked simultaneously to try to mesh the torn skin together. After several minutes the only thing that remained on Lana's body for her troubles was a dark scar running from the length of her left side. Bethany slid up towards her head then, seeming not to care that she was kneeling in a pool of deep red blood. She placed a shaking hand over her sister's head and conjured a ball of blue light in her hand. Isabela watched as the light began to seep into Lana's body, slowly beginning to revive her. After a few torturous minutes, Hawke's eyes finally opened.

Lana looked around, confused at the numerous faces all staring down at her in amazement: Her companions, the nobles, Knight-Commander Meredith, Orsino and numerous Templars and City Guard. Her head felt like she had a terrible hangover, like the kind where you wake up lying face down in a ditch, wearing nothing but your underwear and don't remember how you got there. After a day like today, that sounded like something she might like to do actually. That's if The Hanged Man was still standing.

One face in the crowd stood out above all the others.

"Bethany...?" she asked confused, recognising her sister first. For one wild moment she thought they were back in Lothering. That was until her eyes found Isabela's. The pirates face was upside down as she hovered over her, a huge grin on her face, mixed with sheer relief. Lana could feel something soft under her head and realised she was laying across the pirate's lap. Isabela stroked Lana's cheek with her hand, not caring that the others were watching nearby.

"You had me worried there," she said jokingly, her grin turning into a cheeky smirk as it so often did when she spoke to Lana.

" Why?" Hawke asked, as though it was nothing, "Cleaning up your mess is what I do best. Didn't I tell you I'm used to it by now?"

The surrounding crowd laughed at the joke, feeling the tense moment become diffused, but Isabela found that she couldn't anymore. The grin fell off her face as she stared down at the hurt in Hawke's eyes. Lana wasn't smiling either. _I'm an idiot for not realising what I had, when I had it _Isabela, thought to herself regretfully_...I had to go and mess things up as usual...and now I'm beginning to wonder if any of this is enough. Maybe I should have continued on towards Ostwick._

After the laughter had died out, the nobles began to applaud and cheer as Isabela and Bethany helped Hawke to her feet.

"The city has been saved!" people began to shout with glee.

Knight Commander Meredith grabbed Lana's left hand and raised it into the air, declaring her Champion of Kirkwall. The nobles cheered louder then and began to move in to get a good look at their hero. Lana smiled at them as best she could, accepting their handshakes, pats on the back, kisses on her head, ruffles of her hair and words of gratitude. _Yeah, that's right, this waste of space has saved you all even after you treated her like shit. _To be honest, the only thing Lana really wanted to do was to fall asleep in the arms of either Isabela or Bethany who were supporting her on either side and walking her out of the Keep.

As soon as they got out into the early morning sun, the cheering crowd waiting outside overwhelmed them. Lana felt Isabela slip from her grasp, ushered to the side by the men and women around them. Hawke looked to her left, reaching out her hand, trying to see where she went. Suddenly Aveline moved in beside her and took the pirate's place, wrapping Lana's arm around her shoulder. Hawke was barely listening as the people of Kirkwall continuously thanked her and wished her well. She became lost in thought about Isabela, who was no where insight. _Did she release me? _She wondered, _Or was she pulled away by someone else? _Hawke glanced over at Aveline, wondering if she anything to do with the Rivaini's sudden disappearance. _No...Why would she?_

Turning to her right then, Lana's eyes found Bethany's. Her little sister gave her a strained smile. It was clear there were a lot of things they needed to talk about. Four years had come and gone with little contact and a lot had happened in that time. She knew it hadn't been easy of her little sister to be locked up in the Gallows, but the last four years hadn't exactly been a walk in the park for her either.

Lana opened her mouth to speak but before she could utter a sound, Bethany shook her head.

"Not here, Sister," she said quietly, as the crowd continued to shout excitedly around them. Lana closed her mouth then and forced a smile on her face. She was right. Now wasn't the time. This was supposed to be a good moment, a time to celebrate. She had just singlehandedly defeated the Arishok and forced the Qunari out of Kirkwall after years of not budging from their compound. Kirkwall was in her debt and they all knew it. Pushing Isabela and Bethany from her mind she tried to enjoy the moment, ignoring the pain overwhelming her entire body. She found it ironic that the people months ago who were shouting abuse at her after that disastrous dinner party were now the same people who were congratulating her and inviting her to social functions (which she had no intention of going to).

After several hours of crowd playing, Lana managed to shake off her newfound admirers. Bethany was taken back to the Circle along with Orsino by Knight-Commander Meredith, who promised Hawke she could have a special visit with her little sister the next day as a gift for saving the city. Lana waved goodbye to her, pleased that they would finally get to talk tomorrow and maybe work things out. She had no desire to lose the one Hawke family member she had left. They had been close once before, and Lana was determined that they would be again. She missed Bethany everyday she had been gone.

"I'm sure it felt good cutting off that bastard's head," Aveline said to Hawke as they walked towards a nearby wall to sit down and catch their breath. Lana shrugged.

"To be honest I didn't feel anything," she admitted, shrugging, "He hadn't done anything to me personally. I was just trying to save the city."

"And Isabela?" the Guardswoman pressed curiously. Hawke's jaw clenched.

"Yes...," she admitted, "And Isabela..."

Lana eased herself onto the wall with Aveline's help and the others sat down beside her, Varric and Aveline choosing to stay on their feet. Hawke could tell the Guard Captain hadn't finished talking about the pirate and was glad when Varric intervened.

"Well, Hawke," Varric began, "I can't say that travelling with you has ever been dull..."

The others chuckled in agreement. Lana giggled a little herself.

"I need a vacation," she droned, making them laugh even more. "Why is it that wherever I go, the resident idiot heads straight for me?"

"You're a magnet for idiots," Fenris replied, "Dangerous idiots at that."

Hawke chuckled. Truer words were never spoken.

"That was definitely the biggest one though," Merril squeaked, "I've never see you try to fight anyone that scary before."

"Well when choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before," Lana joked, "And the other Qunari were just too _regular sized _for me."

Hawke's companions laughed, none more so than Merrill. Hawke looked up at Aveline about to ask her something, when all of a sudden her eyes caught sight of a pirate in the distance. _Isabela. _Lana got to her feet, using Merrill's skinny shoulder as leverage and squeezed through Aveline and Varric, feeling the questioning stares of everyone at her sudden movement. All eyes found Isabela then, who had stopped walking as she saw Lana limping towards her. The others watched from a distance as the two approached each other and began to talk.

"Feeling better?" Isabela asked concerned. Just as she said the words Lana almost doubled over in pain in front of her eyes, the effort of walking without support making her unstable. Isabela reached out her arms and caught her, "Guess you're lucky I'm here," she joked, steering her over to a low wall much like to one the others were sitting on opposite them, a short distance away.

"For once," Lana replied unemotionally as the pirate sat herself down beside her. The two women sat in silence. They both looked at each other simultaneously, neither knowing where to begin.

"I'm sorry," Isabela said finally, unable to hold it in any longer. She had to make her see how much she regretted leaving her in the lurch like that. Lana didn't soften at her apology.

"I've heard that before," she said, staring into the pirate's amber eyes painfully. Isabela exhaled.

"I mean it this time," she said sincerely, placing a hand on Lana's thigh. "I made a mistake leaving you like that, Hawke, probably the biggest one I've ever made in my entire life."

"Even compared to stealing from the Qunari?" Lana joked before she could stop herself. Isabela snorted a laugh. She gazed at Lana for several seconds before nodding.

"Even bigger than that," she replied, serious once more. Hawke swallowed hard, surprised by the effusiveness of Isabela's words. _What is she saying?_

"I...I don't think I can ever trust you again after what you did," Hawke said sadly. She had given the pirate her trust blindly and look what had happened. The woman had betrayed her and took off, leaving only a note as a goodbye after everything they had been through together. Isabela frowned.

"And you would be a fool to," the pirate agreed, "I used you...I manipulated you...and you fell for it, hook, line and sinker..."

Isabela saw tears build in Lana's chocolate-brown eyes. Hawke swallowed over the lump in her throat, feeling like a complete idiot. She had known that Isabela had been playing her, ever since the woman ran off with the relic, abandoning her in the middle of a Qunari uprising. But it still hurt to hear the words come directly from her mouth.

"You really hurt me, Bela," Hawke said painfully, dropping her head and staring at the ground. She felt Isabela's hand tighten on her thigh.

"I know," she replied softly, "And I am _so _sorry for that...Hawke look at me..."

When Lana didn't move, Isabela reached out with her other hand and touched her cheek, turning her to face her. "I don't think you know how difficult this is for me to say but...I..._do_ trust you," the pirate said, finally answering the question Lana had asked, after being afraid to before. Hawke's eyes widened with surprise. She sighed.

"So why did you leave?" she asked, feeling a little angry now, pulling away from the pirate's hand on her face, "I was prepared to give you the relic to get Castillon off your back, prepared to fight the damn Qunari off just to save your life...And you went right around and stabbed me in the back anyway, making me look like a complete and utter fool!"

"Look, I'm sorry alright!?" Isabela replied, her own voice rising, "How many times do you want me to say it? I came back, didn't I? Surely that must be worth something to you!"

"I don't know what its worth," Hawke yelled. "You tell me!"

"Try to see it from my point of view!" Isabela yelled back.

Hawke snorted, "I'm trying to but can't seem to fit my head that far up my own ass!"

"Oh HA HA!" Isabela replied sarcastically. She ran her hand through her hair and got to her feet with a groan. Lana watched her pace as she wrestled with her thoughts. "This was probably the only time I wasn't thinking of myself...and it's your damn fault!"

"Well, I suppose this is the first selfless thing you've ever done," Hawke admitted, "These people owe you their lives."

"It was a stupid thing to do!" Isabela replied, "Now I'm probably going to wind up dead in some alley way with a blade of the Felicisima Armada lodged in my back."

"You saved Kirkwall by coming back," Lana said, getting to her feet with difficulty. She reached out a placed a hand on Isabela's arm, not wanting her to doubt the first selfless thing she had ever done.

"Bullshit!" she exclaimed, "The city couldn't have been saved without you. I'm just the pirate whore who started this whole mess as usual."

"Maybe," Hawke admitted, rubbing her arm and tucking a hand under her chin, "but at least this time you came back to try and clean it up."

Isabela stared into her eyes, seeing that same look there which had always confused her before. She understood now though, for she was looking at Lana the exact same way for the very first time.

"You saved these people, Bela," Hawke whispered, smiling at her.

Without another word, Isabela leaned in and placed her lips on Lana's. She knew the others were still watching but she hadn't come all this way for nothing. She wrapped her arms around her waist and pulled her close, savouring every breathtaking moment. Lana's lips were soft and gentle against hers, their tongues moving together slow and tender, intoxicating and passionate. It was a feeling that neither of them could describe, a feeling that Isabela wanted to remember forever as she realised what she was going to do next. Something that would change everything.

After several seconds, the pirate pulled back. She pushed a bit of hair from Lana's face and tucked it behind her ear.

"I didn't do it for them, Hawke...," she said gently, "I did it for you...It was always about you..."

Without waiting for a response Isabela leaned in once more and placed a quick, firm kiss on Hawke's lips before releasing her and walking away.

Lana opened her eyes after the kiss, shocked to see Isabela's back to her.

"Bela, wait!" she called to her, limping after her as fast as she could. She finally reached out far enough to grab her arm and spin her around. "You can't just say something like that and walk away!"

Isabela pulled out of her grasp, avoiding her eyes. She wanted her more than anything, but a sudden realisation had come to her.

"I can't do this, Hawke, I thought I could but...I don't like the person I'm becoming around you," she said, finally looking into Hawke's confused eyes. "I'm not the type of person who changes to be like those around them."

Hawke frowned, "What...what does that mean?" she asked, shaking her head, puzzled.

"I'm tired of hurting you," Isabela continued, "I'm tired of being a constant disappointment. I'm not ever going to be this person that you want me to be, Hawke...the one who comes back and saves the day. It's just not me."

"That's not what I want!" Hawke replied, her frown deepening.

"Isn't it?" Isabela asked, "Are you saying you preferred when I stabbed you in the back then?" Lana said nothing. Isabela sighed, "I ran the whole way here you know...Half way to Ostwick and to saving my own skin and I ran back to be with you...I had this fool notion in my head, you see, that we would be good together...That I loved you..."

Hawke couldn't believe what she was hearing. _She loved me? _"Then... what's changed?" she asked, "Why are you walking away from me again?"

Isabela exhaled, "This is not me," she said sadly, "It was your damned influence which made me come back with that relic, nothing more...Your actions rubbing off onto me...and I don't want to change who I am, Hawke...So I think we...I think we should spend some time apart until I figure out what I do want..."

"What?" Hawke breathed, "But-"

"Don't try to follow me..." Isabela interrupted.

Lana stood speechless as she watched her go. _She loves me, _she couldn't help but thinking. _She loves me, and she trusts me...but she thinks I'm changing her? _Hawke couldn't make sense of it all.

"Isabela!" she called after her. She need more of an explanation than that, "Isabela, come back!... _Please!_"

The pirate continued walking as fast as she could, without looking back.


	23. Chapter 23

The last three years in Kirkwall had brought about a lot of change in many respects. After winning the battle against the Qunari, there was a certain positive energy surging up from the most unlikely corners of the city: the slums in Darktown and Lowtown. The idea that a Ferelden immigrant had defeated the Arishok in single combat had given the poor something to hope for in themselves and aspire towards instead of succumbing to a life of petty crime and murder. The biased views of the nobles towards them were beginning to distort and reform. Suddenly they didn't seem so worthless anymore. The city still hadn't appointed a new Viscount after Dumar's beheading and instead the control of the city fell into the hands of the Templars, much to the fury of the mages...and one in particular.

"You're driving me crazy again with that shit, Anders," Hawke groaned. "You need to calm down before you end up in the Gallows along with Bethany."

They were sitting in Anders' clinic in Darktown, catching up on recent events that had been transpiring throughout Kirkwall. Lana's relationship with the mage and started to repair after whole Qunari extravaganza, much to the delight of Aveline who wouldn't have to worry about throwing her in prison again. She still feared that one day Hawke would lash out and silence Anders for good after what had happened all those years ago with Bethany. Lana still couldn't forgive him for going behind her back and recruiting her little sister to aid the mages, resulting in her being found by the Templars and imprisoned in the Gallows. However, it was clear to her now that Anders deeply regretted his actions (or he just didn't want another beating...one of the two). He had tried desperately to fix things between them the last few years and Lana found it hard to ignore the lengths he went to to help her out. She'd had a difficult few years (no change there then).

"I'm sorry," Anders replied, running a hand through his long blond hair where he stood. "I know you don't want to hear about what conditions are like inside the Circle of Magi right now, but I have no one else to talk to about this who will understand."

"Any word of Bethany?" Lana asked worriedly. The last time she had seen or heard anything from her little sister was the day of the Arishok battle, three years ago.

"Nothing," Anders said, re seating himself beside her on the chair in front of the fire. "I asked around but none of my contacts had any information on her. I think Knight-Commander Meredith is keeping a close eye on her, given her connection to you. No one wants to get too close to her at the minute for fear of Templar backlash."

Hawke sighed, fearful for her sister's life. She stared into the dying embers of the flames in the grate, lost in thought about the day she had went to see Bethany a few days after her battle with the Arishok...

* * *

Lana woke up to the smell of breakfast wafting up from a tray on her bedside table. _Bodhan, _she thought, smiling to herself. _He's such a caring fellow. _Gingerly, she used her arms to straighten up in bed and reached out, grabbing the tray of steaming hot food and placed it on her lap. Her entire body was still in pain after the duel with the Arishok a few days before, but nothing ached more so than her heart. Watching Isabela walk away from her after declaring her love hurt more than when she had betrayed her and stolen the Tome of Koslun. Lana had never believed in a million years that the hedonistic pirate would fall in love with her, even if it was what she had wanted. Now it seemed that, even though she had gotten her wish, whatever she and the Rivaini had possessed before that was lost. No one had seen her since after the battle when she had kissed Lana then walked away. Hawke was dreading coming face to face with her again, wondering where in all of Thedas they could go from here.

After finishing her breakfast, Lana had dressed and left the Estate. As she made her way towards the Gallows her thoughts fell on Bethany. She was so excited to see her again. Finally they would get a chance to talk, Maker knows they needed it. A lot needed to be said and Lana was determined to rekindle her relationship with her long-lost sister. It was so long since she had been surrounded by family (excluding Gamlen who came round occasionally to borrow money for whores). Sometimes at night when she found it hard to sleep, her mind would flash back to happier times in Lothering when all five of the Hawke's were together again. It was hard to believe that there were only two of them left now. They couldn't be angry with each other forever.

Lana smiled at the Templars guarding the doors to the Gallows as she approached. _First time I've ever done that, _she joked to herself. She paused before them.

"I'm...here to see my sister," she said. When the guards exchanged a confused look she added, "Bethany Hawke?"

Suddenly a look of recognition overcame them.

"Ah yes," the Templar on the right answered, nodding, "You must be the Champion, Serah. My apologies...I had assumed you were a man."

"Excuse me?" Lana replied, frowning. "My breasts speak for themselves, don't you think?" The young Templar spluttered and stuttered as he tried unsuccessfully not to stare at the top of Lana's shirt where a decent amount of cleavage was showing. He realised how his words had sounded.

"No, Serah...I –I mean yes, Serah...They're very nice breasts...That's to say...Sorry, Serah...I simply meant...I-I had no idea the Champion of Kirkwall would be a woman...The stories, My Lady. They say you defeated the Arishok in single combat, cutting off his horned head with a broken dagger!"

Lana held in her laugh at the two blushing Templar recruits. She rather enjoyed making men flustered. She remembered Isabela used to do it all the time and it always looked like fun. Of course the pirate would, more often than not, bed them afterwards. That wasn't Lana's style though (not with men anyway). She pretended to think for a minute, then nodded, "Hmm...Yeah that sounds about right. Tough big bastard he was," she joked. The other Templar looked at her in awe.

"And is it true," he asked, "that you once arm wrestled with a Darkspawn ogre during the Blight and then rode the Arch Demon into the Battle of Denerim with the Hero of Ferelden, before helping her kill it?"

Lana's eyebrows narrowed, and a curious smile appeared on her face, "Umm...sure," she replied, rather liking that one. _Someone_ had clearly put a lot of thought into it.

The Templars looked at each other in disbelief. The one on the right continued, his eyes almost popping out of his head in awe.

"And is it also true," he asked eagerly, "that you danced the Rim of Gold naked on the top of the Frostback Mountains after downing a full barrel of ale and seducing a ship full of pirates, stealing their treasure?!"

Lana's frown deepened. "Eh..._that_ one I don't remember," she said, beginning to curse the rumours.

Since saving Kirkwall from the Qunari she had become something of a celebrity in Kirkwall, even though many didn't even know who she was (and clearly that she was in fact a 'she'). The nobles had taken notice and were constantly inviting her to social events and calling for her to be Viscount, while Lowtown men and woman insisted on buying her drinks in The Hanged Man. The drinks always sounded more appealing. Rumours had been spreading throughout the city about her 'accomplishments' and many people came to her for confirmation. Their eyes lit up with reverence as they asked about a certain battle, or seductive as they asked her of a certain sexual encounter, or in general people just wanted to hear her speak to them so as they could run and tell their friends they were friends with the Champion of Kirkwall. Lana played along for the most part, rather enjoying some of the stories. Others though, were just downright disturbing.

"Well, gentlemen, I can't say it hasn't been fun," she said, addressing the Templars once more, "But I have a meeting with my little sister which I have been waiting for for four years."

"Yes, Serah, my apologies," the Templar on the right said, "Knight Commander Meredith's office is just up the set of stairs to your left inside."

"Thank you," Hawke replied happily, walking through the door the other Templar held open for her.

As she made her way to the Knight-Commander's office she smiled to herself. Varric had been very busy telling stories it seemed. At least his were something she could feel proud of. _I must remember to buy him a drink in The Hanged Man later...and also ask him who invented the Rim of Gold story. _Lana reached out and opened the door to the Knight-Commander's office. She had expected Bethany to be sitting waiting for her, having given word days in advance that she would be coming today at this time. What greeted her though, was a rather unpleasant looking Knight-Commander Meredith.

"Champion," she greeted her, looking up from where she sat at her desk, "Please sit down."

The smile slid from Lana's face. She stayed on her feet.

"Where's Bethany?" she asked, feeling uneasy all of a sudden. The Knight-Commander got to her feet and stared out of the barred window of her office. A few moments of silence passed between them.

"Your sister decided she does not want to see you," Meredith said, her back to Hawke. "I am sorry."

"What?!" Lana blurted out, "What are you talking about?"

Meredith turned back to Lana then. "I offered her the opportunity to receive a visitor but she refused. She asked me to pass on a message instead."

"Which is?" Lana demanded, feeling angry all of a sudden. Meredith's jaw tightened. She stared into Hawke's troubled eyes.

"'I never want to see you again,'" she said, "'I can't forgive you for mother's death and my life is better off in the Gallows away from all the pain you have caused.'"

Hawke's mouth fell open. She slowly dropped onto the nearest chair, feeling the wind knocked out of her. _Bethany said that? How could she?_

"I am sorry, Serah," Meredith said in her cold voice. She didn't seem sorry at all. Lana looked up at her in confusion.

"I don't understand," she said, "Bethany...she wanted to talk. She told me so herself."

"Did she though?" Meredith countered. Hawke hesitated then. Her head dropped. She though back to after her duel with the Arishok a few days previous. She had opened her mouth to speak to Bethany, to work things out between them...But Bethany had silenced her. 'Not here Sister', she said. Had Lana misread her words? She had taken 'not here' to mean that they were indeed going to talk, only later when they were alone instead of in front of half the nobles in Kirkwall. Technically, the Knight-Commander was right. Bethany hadn't exactly said she wanted to talk. Lana had just assumed.

"Why would she do this to me?" Lana asked, looking back up at the Knight-Commander. "It doesn't make any sense..."

"I think her words were clear, Champion. She blames you for Leandra Hawke's death," Meredith answered harshly, "I offered you this visit as a privilege for protecting this city from the Qunari. Your sister has refused."

Hawke shook her head, still trying to come to terms with this. Bethany was never one to just shut her out completely. Even when they were little she could never stay angry for long. Sooner of later Lana would do something to make her laugh or hug her in apology and she would forgive her for what ever had happened between them. This was just so unlike her to not give her the chance to ask for forgiveness. Something fishy was going on.

Hawke stared into Meredith's eyes, considering her for a second. Something wasn't right here. "I hope for your sake, Knight-Commander," she said suspiciously, " that nothing has happened to my sister."

"Are you threatening me, Champion?" Meredith replied, amused. Lana knew then that her instincts had been right.

"Yes," she replied intimidating, "I am."

Knight-Commander Meredith leaned back on her giant, throne-like chair and laughed evilly.

"Do you know who I am?" she threatened back, unfazed by the fearless killer before her.

Lana got to her feet and leaned over the giant table that separated her and the Knight-Commander. "Someone very stupid if you think you can mess with my family," she said dangerously, her eyes narrowing. "If there is so much as a hair out-of-place on my sister's head, you are the first one I will be coming for."

The smile slid off the Knight-Commander's face then. She got to her feet as well, leaning over the table until their faces were only inches apart.

"I'd be careful about what you say, Champion," she replied through gritted teeth. "Or your sister may find a little poison tipped into her morning porridge. Wouldn't that be fun?"

Lana growled in fury and raised her hand, grabbing the Knight-Commander by the throat. Suddenly she felt the point of a blade pressed up against her bad ribs. Her hand on the Knight's Commander's neck didn't tighten, but she didn't let go either.

"I'm warning you, _Commander_," she snarled, "Leave my sister alone or poison will be the least of your worries. A dagger in the side will not be enough to keep me from you."

"And I'm warning _you, Champion_," Meredith replied roughly, "Your sister's life depends entirely on your actions right now. If you want her safe then you will do _exactly_ as I say. I'm in charge here."

Lana stared at her for several seconds before reluctantly releasing her hand from around Meredith's neck. The Knight-Commander sat back down then, gesturing for Hawke to do the same.

"So what was the point of this charade?" Lana asked, "Make me think my sister had abandoned me and then you swoop in and be the hero?"

"Pah!" Meredith spat, "Don't be stupid, Hawke. I had originally intended to let you see her. That was before I realised that it would be a mistake on my part, considering the company you keep. In this present climate I cannot allow anyone with affiliation to mages pass information into the Circle to incite rebellions within."

"That's what you think I wanted to see her for?" Lana asked in disbelief. "I couldn't give a damn about your dispute with the mages! I just wanted to see my damn sister!"

"Seen your friend Anders recently?" she asked. Hawke said nothing, realising what she was getting at then. Anders had been responsible for Bethany being in the Gallows in the first place. He also helped heal Hawke in front of everyone after her fight with the Arishok. In the heat of the moment he had a complete disregard for his own safety and exposed his magic to help save Lana's life. Suddenly it struck Lana. Meredith had known about him all along. She was just waiting for the right time to play her hand. Hawke didn't realise up until that point that Anders had really cared about making up for his mistake with Bethany. So much so that he preformed illegal magic in front of Templars and half the population of Kirkwall just to try to make things right between them.

"Exactly," Knight-Commander Meredith replied, knowing she had Hawke exactly where she wanted her. "If you want your friend to continue the life of an apostate and for your sister to see tomorrow...you are going to do something for me."

"Hmm, sorry but you're not really my type," Lana said sarcastically, "I prefer women with...backbone."

Meredith laughed, "Then I wouldn't suggest the Blooming Rose either. As tempting an offer as that is, that's not what I meant."

Hawke got to her feet and walked towards the door. "Good," she replied, "Then there are no other services I am offering. I won't be blackmailed by some wench who thinks she runs the city."

Meredith wasn't fooled. She got to her feet as well. "You'd really turn your back on you little sister like that?" she mocked.

Lana turned back, "She turned her back on me remember?" she joked, referring to Meredith's attempted lie. Hawke turned on her heel and left.

"I'll be in touch," Meredith called after her, knowing she had won. The Champion of Kirkwall was now firmly in her pocket.

As soon as Lana stormed out of the Gallows she headed towards The Hanged Man in a fury. _That bitch is going to pay for this! _She had been so excited to see her sister and work things out and now because of some stupid Mage-Templar dispute that chance had been stolen for her. Then there was Anders. The mage had put himself in danger for her out of guilt and now she was not only responsible for Bethany's fate but his. Maker knows what the Knight-Commander wanted her for. The Templar leader was in the strongest position in Kirkwall right now. What could the Champion do that she or her Templars could not? Lana had a feeling it had something to do with mages. The thought made her feel uneasy. Where mages were involved, there was always trouble.

Finally reaching The Hanged Man, Lana pushed open the door forcefully and walked straight to the bar.

"Good day, Serah Hawke," Corff greeted her, "What can I get you?"

"The Knight-Commander's head?" she replied bitterly. Corff laughed.

"Didn't think she was your type, Hawke," Varric's voice interrupted. He climbed onto a nearby stool and smirked up at Lana.

"Not that kind of 'head', Varric," she replied, sniggering, "Though would you believe that I did consider sleeping with her today in exchange for my sister and Anders' lives?"

"WHAT?" Both Corff and Varric blurted out in disbelief. Hawke turned to the bartender.

"Umm...little privacy here, Corff?" she asked.

"Sorry," he replied. Lana watched him pour her a large whiskey and leave the rest of the bottle on the counter before walking off to serve another customer.

"So what's this about?" Varric asked, confused. Lana held up a hand stopping him. She then knocked back the jigger of whiskey in one and slammed the mug back down onto the counter.

"Ok, now I'm ready..."

Varric laughed. "That bad, huh?"

"Worse," Lana replied, "The bitch wouldn't let me see Bethany. She tried to feed me some crackpot old story about her not forgiving me about mother's death blah blah blah...Then I realised she was full of shit, grabbed her by the throat and she held a dagger to me...Anyway, basically I'm now in the pocket of the power-hungry, Knight-Commander who is willing to kill Bethany and stick Anders in the Gallows if I don't do as she asks."

Shaking her head, Lana poured herself another whiskey and knocked it back as Varric sat trying to process her rushed story.

"Maker's Breath, Hawke," he said with a small laugh, seeing how on edge she was, "You never do get a fair end of a deal."

"Tell me about it," she replied, exhaling.

"And your story telling is horrendous," the dwarf joked, "You went about as quick as a woman running from Gamlen."

Lana snorted into her drink and began to laugh. "Sorry," she said, "I just couldn't be bothered going into detail. I'm still ready to go back and throttle her."

Varric chuckled. He helped himself to a mug of Lana's whiskey and turned to see Lana's face fall as she began to calm down.

"Sorry about Bethany," he said, "I know you were looking forward to seeing her again."

Hawke nodded bitterly, "Well...I've wait four years to talk to her...Guess I can wait a bit longer. That is if she doesn't die in the process."

"Just do as the Knight-Commander asks," Varric said, "Even if she only wants you for sexual favours."

"Already offered. She wasn't interested," Lana joked. Varric laughed.

"How dare she?" he teased, "A fine-looking woman such as yourself."

Lana turned to him with a smirk, "Well, well," she began, "So it's finally out in the open? I always knew you had a thing for me Varric."

The dwarf chuckled, "I may have...noticed your dashing good looks and pretty brown eyes...but you're no Bianca. There's only one woman in my life, Hawke, and that's her."

Hawke laughed, "How romantic," she replied, "You never did tell me the story of how Bianca got her name."

"And I never will," he replied, "Bianca is the only story I'll never tell."

"Ooo, now I want to know even more," she joked. The dwarf gave her a cheeky grin and a wink.

"Exactly."

Both of them laughed and knocked back another shot of whiskey.

"Speaking of stories," Lana began, "I must thank you for the Arch Demon and Ogre arm wrestling one. I rather enjoyed it."

Varric laughed. "Don't mention it. It started off simple then just started to snowball. I may add more to it later. It's one of my favourites too."

"However," Hawke said, holding up a finger of warning, "The dancing naked one on the Frostback Mountains to the Rim of Gold? Please tell me that wasn't you..."

The dwarf gave her a guilty look.

"VARRIC!"

He began to laugh. "Sorry Hawke. I was drunk. Anyway, it's not like I could make you the perfect soldier in all of them. People will start to believe I'm just making it all up!"

Lana laughed, "Oh Varric," she chuckled, shaking her head, "Don't ever change."

"Right back at you," the dwarf said, raising his mug. Hawke raised hers and toasted with him. They both knocked back the whiskey and Lana refilled their mugs.

"So...Heard anything?" she asked. Varric didn't need to ask about what. Lana had asked him the same question every day since the Qunari had left Kirkwall.

"You're not going to like this," he said. Hawke turned to him, glad he had some news but knowing it wouldn't be good. The dwarf hesitated before continuing. "Her rooms been emptied. Corff told me she checked out that very same night. She's gone Hawke...I'm sorry."

* * *

...Anders' voice brought Lana back from her memories. He handed her a mug of whiskey and seated himself on the chair beside hers. Lana's face fell, still absorbed in her thoughts. She stared down into the honey coloured liquid in her mug and swirled it around miserably. So Isabela had meant what she said. The pirate had left without even a goodbye all those years ago. Lana hoped wherever she went she was at least happy. She couldn't deal with the idea that she would never see her again but didn't want to be the reason why Isabela was emotionally unavailable, not when the pirate realised that she could indeed love someone again. If the Rivaini thought that time apart from Lana would do her good then Hawke had to let her go. This wasn't what Isabela wanted, and Lana felt guilty for making her fall in love with her, as stupid as that sounded. It seemed like a lifetime ago that they were just flirting back and forth and playing games with each other when they had just met. What Lana wouldn't give to go back to those days where everything was so uncomplicated between them. She missed their jokes, the pranks they played on Aveline, the endless drunken nights in The Hanged Man with Bethany and Varric, playing cards and gambling, getting into brawls...Maker, those were the days. Now, three years on, Lana realised that she didn't just love Isabela like a lover, she loved having her as a friend as well. Without her, nothing was the same, and it never would be again.


	24. Chapter 24

**_SORRY FOR THE DELAY...HAPPY READING XD_**

* * *

Hawke dragged her feet along the uneven pavement in Lowtown, her head hung, large, heavy raindrops falling heavily onto her shoulders. She had never been more sick and tired of Kirkwall than in the last three years. Knight Commander Meredith had her firmly in her pocket and she was manipulating her at every turn, getting her to do her dirty work in the city in exchange for her sister's life and Anders' safety. _First Isabela, now Meredith...Am I always going to be someone's puppet?_ The amount of apostates she had either killed or handed over to the Templars in the last year alone under Meredith's orders was criminal. The guilt and hypocrisy had been eating away at Hawke's conscience as she thought about all the damage she had caused the mage's families, inflicting the same pain on them that had been done to her own family all those years ago when Bethany had been torn away from them.

But she had no choice. Even though her sister hated her, Hawke would not fail her again. So if that meant selling her soul and working for the Templars, then she would do it. Even if Bethany never found out what she did, Hawke felt she owed it to her. So every time she handed over an apostate to the Templars, Hawke pushed the guilt to the back of her mind and reminded herself why she was doing it: To keep her little sister safe.

Lana sighed and shook the wetness from her hair as she pushed open the door to The Hanged Man. The warmth of the fire inside assaulted her face and she shivered a little, feeling the cold disappear rapidly. She crossed the tavern and put her things down on a nearby table before walking to the bar, pushing her worries to the back of her mind and looking forward to a well-earned pint. As she made her way to order a drink she was intercepted by a familiar-looking dwarf.

"Oh, not now Varric, _please_," Hawke groaned, her face falling, "I've had a really shit day and I just wan-"

"Hawke, I don't think you want to be here right now," he said, blocking Lana's attempts at escape. After several seconds of him mirroring her, Lana stopped trying to go around him then and looked down, seeing the seriousness on his face.

"What do you mean?" she asked curiously, her eyes narrowing. Anything that makes Varric's face look like that can't be good. Varric grimaced, as though what he had to say would be painful. Lana heard him sigh.

"Just go home, Hawke," he pled, "...Unless you want that shit day of yours to get worse. Trust me."

Lana was in no mood for riddles. She was so exhausted. "Just tell me what the deal is, Varric or get out of my way. I really need a drink to drown my guilt. I put three apostates in the Gallows today, _Three! _That's three more families I have torn apart for my own selfish needs and those of my sister. So if you have something to say then spit it out, otherwise I'm going to go through you in order to get a drink."

"All right..." he relented, shaking his head, "Don't say I didn't warn you."

The dwarf nodded his head to the other side of the bar behind him, gesturing towards a woman. She was standing alone, mulling over the contents of a mug in her hand. A bottle of port rested on the counter beside her. Lana froze when she saw her. Her breath caught. The woman hadn't been seen in three years. _Three years! _And now here she was. Other than wearing a black corset and a red bandana on her arm she looked completely unchanged. Varric watched Lana's face change as she stared at the familiar figure. He could see the pain and betrayal forming, that which Lana had tried so hard to hide from them all since the day the Qunari left Kirkwall. The dwarf frowned, not wanting his friend to get hurt any more than she already was. Even though Hawke had been concealing it well, it was obvious that she missed Isabela. Everyone knew it, though no one ever mentioned it to her. Seeing now, the look on Lana's face, Varric knew that their suspicions had been correct.

Lana was still frozen in the middle of the floor. She didn't know what to do. _What do you say to someone after three years? After they disappeared without a trace? _She continued to stare, stunned to see the woman she had thought endlessly about before her. _Andraste's Ass..._Finally recovering from the shock, Lana turned and rushed back to her table, dwarf in tow. She began to grab her things as quickly as she could, her hands shaking uncontrollably.

"I have to get out of here..." she said, more to herself than Varric. Varric watched Lana frantically try to pack up her stuff. He could see how flustered she was. It wasn't like her. He couldn't take it anymore.

"Look, stop!" he said, grabbing her arms. "Relax. Here..." He held out a nearby chair for her, "Sit down ...I'll get you that drink."

Lana eased herself onto the chair, running a hand through her hair and exhaling harshly. What a stressful day it had been. This was the last thing she needed. She glanced up at Isabela again. The pirate still hadn't noticed she was here. She stood with her back to the tavern as she normally did. It was like the woman hadn't moved from her regular spot at the bar at all. But she had. So why in The Maker's name was she back?

Feeling angry now, Lana got to her feet. _This is ridiculous! Get a grip Lana...Why should I be the one afraid of seeing her? She's the one who left. She's the one who used me then discarded our friendship like it meant nothing! _Sick of being a plaything for others and then being tossed to the side, Hawke decided she wanted some answers now. She'd had enough. How dare Isabela come back and act as though she had never been gone?_ Surely she knew she would run into me here! Typical! Still thinking of no one but herself._ Before Varric could return with her drink, Lana braced herself and crossed the tavern towards Isabela.

She stopped behind her, her sweating hands balled into fists.

"Waiting for someone?"

Isabela jumped at the sound of Hawke's voice. She hadn't heard that voice in ages. It sounded different now, almost foreign.

"Not particularly," the pirate replied, not even turning around to greet her.

"Well, sober up," Lana ordered, "We need to talk."

Isabela sighed, "I'm sober," she said dryly, pouring more port into her mug, "And no...we don't."

Hawke gritted her teeth in anger and moved in beside her. As Isabela made to raise the mug to her lips, Lana reached out and grabbed her arm, forcing it back on the counter roughly. The contents spilled over the sides. Varric looked up over the other side of the bar, an anxious look on his face. This had clearly been what he wanted to avoid. The muscle in Isabela's jaw twitched as she stared down at the hand on her arm. But Lana didn't remove it.

"Three years," Hawke said, shaking her head, "Three years...and that's all you have to say to me?"

The pirate brushed her off roughly, still avoiding her eyes.

"What else is there?" she asked, her tone uncaring, "You don't need me anymore. You're _the Champion of Kirkwall _after all_."_

Lana noticed the heavy sarcasm in her voice.

"Oh, shut up," she replied bitterly, "I didn't ask for the title."

"Meanwhile I'm still just the selfish, pirate whore responsible for the whole mess," Isabela continued resentfully.

"You're just afraid of being anything else!" Hawke countered. "You're still using the same excuse for your actions all those years ago."

"I told you then, Hawke, that I'm not going to change who I am...not even for you," Isabela spat, "So if that's what you're here for, to try and spout some bullshit speech to me about what a good person I am inside and how I just make bad decisions then you can forget it, _oh Champion of Kirkwall._ You and I have nothing in common anymore."

Hawke's face hardened. "That's not why I'm here. I'm done trying to get through to you. You brought this on yourself...And I'm glad to hear I'm such a big joke to you. Cheers, Bela."

"Ah Hawke, don't be like that," Isabela replied, regretting what she said immediately. Her face softened. She looked up at her at last. Their eyes met. _Maker's breath, she doesn't look good._ There was no usual positive energy coming from Hawke like there had been in the past. Her face was lined with stress and she seemed tenser than Isabela had ever remembered her being. The last three years mustn't have been kind to her. _But when are they ever where Hawke is concerned? And I suppose I'm to blame a little...well maybe more than a little._

"Don't tell me how to be Isabela," Hawke responded angrily, shaking her head, "I'm tired of being nothing more than a mere stepping stone for others. I'm tired of doing everyone's dirty work while they sit back and laugh at the puppet."

"I'm not laughing," Isabela said, surprised at how different Hawke seemed to be now. Normally she would have responded with a joke, or an insult as equal. "And I don't think you're a puppet."

"Well I seemed to be yours for more than I care to remember," Hawke replied.

Isabela hesitated. She saw the hurt on Hawke's face, the bitterness. It was then that the pirate realised that she wasn't the only person to blame for it being there.

"And now?" she asked, concerned.

Hawke sighed and shook her head. She leaned on the bar with her elbows, her head bowed.

"Now I'm another's...only at least this time it's with good reason."

"Who's?"

"None of your business," Hawke replied, ashamed.

"And Bethany?" Isabela pressed. "How is she doing?"

Lana snorted. "Don't act like you care..."

The pirate reached out and touched Hawke's arm. "I do care," she said, her brow creased in worry. "What's happened?"

"What, you mean since you left?" Lana continued, her tone becoming harsher, "Oh I don't know...Let's see...The Templar's own me, apparently I don't have a sister anymore, Gamlen is bleeding me dry and as I'm first choice for the City Guard everyone thinks they can dump their shit on me. The only place I had to relax was here...so thank you so much for ruining it for me. I'm sorry I don't have another heart for you to break in return."

Isabela's jaw dropped. _Shit, I'm a complete idiot for asking. Seems like Hawke is still a magnet for trouble then. Why am I not surprised?_

"I'm sorry..." she said softly, rubbing Hawke's arm. Lana shook her off. She was colder now, colder than the pirate could ever remember her being. She cursed herself for leaving all those years ago, especially leaving the way she did.

"That another lie, Bela?" Lana asked, glaring up at her, "Because I don't know how much more of them I can take..."

"I _am _sorry," the Rivaini replied, wanting to reach out to her again. "Really..."

"Why should I believe you? Why should I believe anything that comes out of your mouth?" Hawke asked, disgustedly, "And anyway...I didn't come here for your sympathy...I just want to know why?"

"Why what?" Isabela asked, confused.

"Why you left!" Lana said impatiently, looking up at her.

Isabela's jaw tightened. She stared back into Hawke's chocolate-brown eyes and her breath caught. She had forgotten the effect they seemed to have on her. Over three years and the woman still possessed the power to woo her with a single glance (even if that glance was icier than before). After several seconds of hesitation the pirate finally found the words.

"Because I had to figure this all out in my head..."

"And have you?" Lana pressed, her brown eyes boring into Isabela's amber ones. After several seconds of silence, Isabela averted her eyes and stared once more into her mug of port, not knowing what to say. Hawke sighed. "Then I guess you were right..." she continued, "We don't have anything to talk about..."

Lana pushed up off the bar and made her way toward the door, too distracted to even remember her things were back at her table. Isabela looked up, seeing her leave.

"Hawke wait!" she called after her. She raised herself from the bar and raced after her, out the door of The Hanged Man and into the cold, damp night. As Lana tried to race off, the pirate caught up with her and grabbed her arm, spinning her around to face her.

"Don't walk away," she pled. The rain was pouring down around them, heavier than before. Within seconds they were both soaked to the skin. Both women stared at each other, trying to catch their breaths. "Just...Don't..."

"Why?" Lana asked, shrugging, "Isn't that what we do?...Tell each other how we feel, then one of us walks away leaving the other to pick up the pieces?"

"Look I..I..." Isabela's eyes darted from side to side, as though trying to find the words to say, "I didn't... _mean_ to stay away for so long," she continued, looking back at Lana now, "I'm _sorry_...Balls...Seems like all we do is communicate in apologies now..."

"I don't want your apology," Lana replied, pulling her arm out of Isabela's grasp. She stared into her eyes, her expression cold. "I just want you to know that you have missed your chance..."

Hawke's words hit Isabela like a tonne of bricks.

"Have I...?"

The rain poured down harder as the two women stood staring at each other in the night. Isabela's question lingered in the air, echoing off the walls of the surrounding buildings. Lana could feel her eyes burning with tears as she stared into the manipulative pirate's face.

"Why don't you come back in three years and tell me..."

With her final words, Hawke turned on her heel and raced through the night before Isabela could try to follow. The pirate watched after her with regret, wishing desperately that she could have turned back time and changed the past.

* * *

"Get up, Hawke. Greet the day!"

Lana screwed up her face as Aveline flung open the curtains in her bedroom, allowing the light to shine through the window and blind her tired eyes.

"Ughh, give me a break, Av," she moaned, "I woke up without a hangover today for a change, don't I get a reward?"

"You're reward is my foot up your ass," the Guardswoman replied, "When would you like it?"

"Tomorrow morning," Hawke moaned, rolling over and closing her eyes again.

"Don't you get smart with me," Aveline scolded, "Now get yourself out of bed and get dressed."

"Go away, Av," Hawke sang back, relaxing into another sleep. Suddenly the blankets were yanked off her.

"Ah, you bitch! It's bloody freezing!" Lana yelled, jumping up. She was wearing nothing but her underwear.

"Good, you're up now. I set your clothes out for you. Don't take too long," Aveline replied, still holding the blankets, lest Hawke try to steal them back.

"What's got you so cheerful and upbeat today?" Lana asked grumpily.

"Nothing..." Aveline answered, beginning to fold the sheets in her arms. Hawke straightened up, a wicked grin appearing on her face. She gasped.

"You got your paragon pampered last night, didn't you!?" she exclaimed.

"WHAT!?" Aveline yelled.

Hawke's grin widened cheekily, "Donnic dampened your Divine, didn't he? Did a little Deep Roads exploration? Tasted your forbidden fruits? Ate your deep mushroom?"

Aveline's face turned a horrible shade of red. "I...I don't know what you're talking about..."

Hawke laughed triumphantly, "I _knew _it!" she shouted, still laughing at the look on Aveline's face. "I'm surprised you're up so early though. Didn't he tire you out?"

The redness on Aveline's face deepened, much to Hawke's delight.

"Or does Donnic's stamina not live up to expectations?" she continued, "Nothing left in the tank?...so to speak..."

"He has plenty in the 'tank', if you must know!" Aveline retorted angrily, offended. Hawke grinned evilly.

"Oh really? Going to try and make little City Guard babies?" she joked, "Carry them around under your heavy armor for nine months then sign them up for duty?"

"Oh, shut up!" the guardswoman snapped.

"Is that what Donnic says?" Lana continued, knowing she was close to hitting her mark, "Or does he tell you? Or...maybe he gags you...hmm..."

"Hawke..."Aveline warned, her anger bubbling. She glared at the mischievous woman before her who was thoroughly enjoying herself now.

"Maybe...you two play heros and heroines..." Lana said with a smile, "'Donnic the Daring dashes into the room, cocksure and ready for action. He spots the muscled, red-headed prisoner, tied to the bedpost in nothing but her smalls. Aveline smiles with delight as her knight in shining, City Guard armor comes to save her at last. She shanks his Jory so hard-'"

"SHUT UP!" Aveline yelled, lunging out with the folded blankets and hitting every inch of Hawke she could find. "SHUT UP, SHUT UP!"

Lana burst out laughing and jumped out of bed, protecting herself, trying to get away from the raging Guard Captain as she attacked her with the heavy, rolled up blankets. They were so heavy it was like being hit with a bag of oranges. _Yes, that has happened me once or twice, believe it or not._

"You're a mischievous, annoying, little imp, Lana Hawke!" she yelled, swinging the blanket roll as hard as she could. She could still hear Hawke's giggles underneath. "STOP LAUGHING!"

This only made Lana laugh even more. "Is that...what Donnic told you...when he showed you his-"

WACK

Hawke's head felt like it was cleaved in two. Her eyes watered. Aveline had properly hit her this time. She could feel the shape of her armored fist forming on the side of her head. The guardswoman stopped flailing the blanket roll about and both women froze.

"Ouch..." came Lana's groan of response. She reached a hand up to her head and held the welt, feeling it pulse underneath her touch.

"Sorry..."Aveline breathed, trying to catch her breath, "I was... instinct..."

Lana started to snigger again. She had more jokes but Aveline had been pushed beyond her limit today. _I'll save them for later._ She got to her feet, trying not to laugh and steadied herself.

"Damn it, Av, I'm seeing stars," she moaned, trying to adjust her vision a little.

"Good!" the guardswoman replied, "Maybe tomorrow you'll think twice about teasing me!"

"It's alright. It's Varric's turn tomorrow anyway."

Lana felt another slap to the side of the head, lighter than the first one but still with enough force to make her grimace again.

"Get dressed," Aveline ordered. "I'll meet you down stairs."

Hawke pulled on her clothes and descended the stairs on the Estate half an hour later. Aveline was standing in the living area, pouring over the letters on Hawke's desk which Bodhan had left before he went to get the shopping.

"Little nosy, aren't you?" Lana joked, walking up behind her.

"Hawke some of these are dated weeks ago," the Guard Captain admonished, "Why haven't you opened them?"

"Are any from Bethany?" Lana asked.

"No."

"Then I don't care..."

Aveline turned back to her friend, seeing the sad look on her face as she began to pour herself a glass of whiskey. There had been no word from the youngest Hawke since the day the Qunari left Kirkwall. Aveline worried for her safety, they all did...but none more so than Lana. Everyone knew it was killing her working for Meredith, but it just proved that Hawke really would do anything to protect her little sister. It was admirable, but Hawke didn't see it that way. She saw it as her duty to make up for her past failures. Bethany was the only one she had left. If she failed now, she had nothing.

"Don't you ever stop drinking?" Aveline asked, seeing her knock back her glass in one.

"I didn't drink last night," Lana said shrugging, "I'm making up for it this morning."

"How come?" Aveline wondered, "Didn't you go to The Hanged Man after we rounded up that last apostate?"

"I did..."Lana admitted, "But I left early..."

"Shocking!" Aveline stated, her tone heavy with sarcasm, "What genius found a way to force you to go home without even one drink? I'd like to kiss them."

Lana gave her a smirk, "I am _so_ glad you asked it that way, Av...It was Isabela."

The Guard Captain's eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "What!?"

Hawke nodded, "She's back..." she said grimly.

Aveline watched her friend go to the nearest chair and sit herself down. She couldn't believe her ears.

"I take it the reunion didn't go well then?" she asked, a little worried. Hawke shrugged uncaringly.

"I didn't expect it to," she answered, "I didn't even think I would see her again."

"And now that you have?"

Lana looked up, confused, "I don't understand..."

"Do you still have feelings for her?"

Aveline saw Hawke hesitate. She bit her lip.

"I...no...I mean...I don't know...maybe..."

"That's a 'yes' Hawke," Aveline informed her. "And if you feel this way then you shouldn't let her go again."

Lana looked up in complete shock. "You're the last person I thought I would hear tell me that! What happened to 'you're making a mistake', 'don't touch that filthy, pirate whore', 'I can't believe you could even kiss her, never mind sleep with her'..."

"Is that really what I sound like?" Aveline asked, when Lana was done impersonating her in a horrible voice. Lana smirked cheekily.

"More or less...I'm still working on some dialogue for you though," she joked.

Aveline rolled her eyes. She dreaded to ask what kind of dialogue. "Anyway...Hawke it doesn't take a genius to work out how miserable you have been these past few years...You miss her..."

Lana shook her head. "No, I don't. Isabela can go and rot for all I care."

"Don't lie to me," Aveline said sceptically. Hawke got to her feet and began to pace the floor.

"Look, I don't want to talk about this, ok?" she said, turning back to Aveline.

"Fine," the Guardswoman answered, "As long as you do one thing..."

Lana sighed, "Fine...What?"

Aveline grinned at her and held up the open letter in her hand. It had very fancy writing and looked to be some sort of invitation.

"Come with me and Varric to this party in Chateau Haine."


	25. Chapter 25

Since Hawke had been avoiding reading her mail for a number of weeks, she and her companions had little time to respond to the party request at Chateau Haine and get themselves ready. The invitation had come from an Orlesian noble named Duke Prosper Du Montfort, who had taken up the seat as head of his powerful dynasty, that of Ser Gaston du Montfort, a chevalier who had risen to prominence during the Fourth Blight. The invitation had originally been for Leandra Hawke née Amell, who had obviously been doing some mingling amongst the highborn after Lana re-purchased the Estate in Hightown for them, gaining back the respect the Amells once held in Kirkwall. However, seeing as her children were also addressed, Lana couldn't see any reason why she shouldn't represent her family at such a social event, seeing a she was the only one left capable of doing so. Although she didn't feel like a party much, Aveline had coaxed her into it to try to break her out of her current state of despair. A few days after Lana had reluctantly told Aveline she would go, they were finally on their way, though not without trouble (obviously).

"Why are we here again?" Lana asked, staring around the dark, desolate streets of Hightown. Something didn't feel right about this. She could feel it in her gut.

"All I know is it had something to do with you and nobles..." Varric said, almost apologetically. They had been standing waiting on an unknown contact for a few minutes along with Merrill and Aveline, and everyone was feeling a little twitchy.

"And yet there's no one..." Lana replied, leaning against the wall, her arms folded. "Why am I not surprised? This is looking more and more like an ambush by the second."

As though on cue, Hawke and her companions all glanced around nervously, waiting for someone to jump out of the shadows and attack them.

"Maybe...he got lost?" Merrill asked innocently, "I'm always getting lost in Kirkwall. It's so confusing. All the buildings look the same."

Hawke groaned. "Oh, Merrill," she said, rolling her eyes along with the others. How did the little elf survive this long in a city as dangerous as Kirkwall? So was so naive. Lana suspected Varric had something to do with it. He was forever using his contacts to look out for his friends, mostly behind their backs. The dwarf's numerous dealings were normally very reliable. This particular deal though seemed to have taken a turn for the worst. Lana was convinced they were being set up.

"Look Hawke," Varric began, defensively, "Things don't always have to be an ambush, you know. Maybe we're just a little early..."

As soon as the word's left Varric's mouth, the four of them were surrounded. They dropped from the buildings around them, popped out from behind numerous hiding places, pointed arrows at them from a nearby staircase and withdrew swords from scabbards until there was absolutely no way out for their prey. The dwarf cursed loudly.

"You were saying?" Lana hissed at him. He smiled back sheepishly.

"All right, maybe sometimes they _are _ambushes," he replied, mirroring Hawke and readying his own weapon in order to play.

Hawke eyed the numerous mercenaries who were raining down on them. Their faces were covered with masks as usual, all except one, a tall blonde figure who seemed to be the leader. Lana watched him closely as he approached, holding her daggers in her sweating hands ready to use them if need be. As the man moved into the moonlight, Hawke realised he was smiling at her, satisfied.

"Ah, there is the Champion of Kirkwall," he said, his Antivan accent breaking the tense silence that had filled the night air around them.

"Congratulations," Lana replied sarcastically, clapping her daggers together in mock praise. "You appear at last. Poor Merrill here was worried you'd gotten lost...It seems you're not as stupid as you look."

The man laughed, "Enjoy your little joke, pretty thing. It will be your last. You die...Today!"

Hawke braced herself, ready to fight. She needn't have. All of a sudden a dagger whizzed past her head and lodged itself in the man's shoulder. He yelled out in pain. Everyone in the square looked up in surprise to see a flash of red and green as a red-headed elf jump from a nearby roof and slit the nearest archer's throat with a quick swipe through the air. Using his body as a shield she moved swiftly throughout the courtyard, tossing numerous daggers in all directions, each of them connecting with the surrounding mercenaries. One by one they fell to the ground, dead. Then, moving with a speed and agility which came with years of training, the elf flipped and dived through the air, avoiding arrows and blades, killing as she went before running straight past a stunned Hawke until she came face to face with the blonde leader. He was still desperately trying to pull the tiny dagger from his arm. The elf held her blade to his throat, winking impishly.

"KILL HER!" the man yelled to his remaining soldiers, "KILL ALL OF TH-"

Before he could finish his last order, the red-head slit his throat, showering them all with a rain of blood. She turned to Lana, who whipped a drop from her forehead and stared back.

"Well?" the elf said expectantly, "What are you waiting for?"

A huge, cheeky grin appeared on Lana's face.

"Just admiring the view," she joked, scanning the woman's body in one sweep.

The fighting erupted once more after a momentary pause. Hawke and her companions happily cut down the rest of the mercenaries, assisting the unknown woman who was adding to her tally. It only took them a few minutes to clean up the entire square, the majority of the mercenaries who remained clearly having just been there as a scare tactic, rather than to actually make a fighting difference. Lana shoved her dagger into the last man's heart, watching the life leave his eyes before taking it out and wiping the blood on his shirt. She let him go and watched as he fell to the ground in a heap, blood oozing out of the wound and staining the ground below.

"Who in The Maker's name is that?" Aveline whispered beside Hawke. They all looked up at the elf that they had fought alongside. She was pulling her daggers out of her victims and cleaning them on her leg.

"My next conquest," Lana joked. Aveline groaned as Varric chuckled at her response. Hawke never gave a straight answer on anything.

"I have a feeling we're going to find out," Varric answered, as the elf turned and began to walk towards them.

"Sloppy..." the woman began, looking around at the dead bodies strewn across the square, "You'd think the Crows would be better at this."

"Interesting entrance," Hawke said with a cheeky smirk, "You have some _fine_ moves..."

"Oh Maker's Breath!" Aveline blurted out, shaking her head.

"I do, don't I?" the woman responded, "My name is Tallis...and I've been looking for you."

"I'll bet," Hawke replied, making Tallis smile.

"Well, looking for someone with an invitation to Chateau Haine to be more specific," the elf replied.

Varric started to laughed, "Ouch, shut down early," he muttered to Lana. She chuckled too and threw him a wink.

"Kill me... now..." Aveline drawled, holding her head in her hands in embarrassment. Hawke and Varric burst into sniggers once again. They loved winding the Iron Lady up. She was so easy to annoy and everyone knew she was uncomfortable with flirting.

"Anyway," Varric continued, "This must have been what Edge was on about. Something to do with a hunt. Remember? Duke Prosper was one of the many who fawned all over you at the Champion of Kirkwall banquet. You know, the Orlesian grease ball with the funny hat who talked endlessly about Wyverns or some shit?"

Recognition struck Lana around the face. Her jaw dropped. "_That's _who Duke Prosper is? I thought I'd never met him before...though I was half-cut at that party because of Isa...Anyway, a hunt doesn't sound like something I'd be interested in. Why do you need to get into Chateau Haine, Tallis?"

Hawke's companions shifted uncomfortable, noticing her swift shift in conversation. Since seeing the pirate again unexpectedly in The Hanged Man a few nights ago, anytime her name was brought up in conversation, Hawke zoned out. As much as she wanted to though, she couldn't stop thinking about her. It was driving her insane. _The woman has a talent for driving people insane._

"Well, I was hoping you would reconsider," Tallis continued, noticing nothing unusual, "The Duke's gatherings are very entertaining...or so I've heard."

"And you sought me out to what?...Ask for my arm at this gathering?" Lana joked. Tallis considered it.

"In a matter of speaking," she replied, "I need to relieve him of something he has no right to possess."

"Those horrible hats?" Hawke asked jokingly, "No one should ever have the right to possess those."

Even Aveline managed to chuckle at that one. They had all witnessed the Duke at the Champion's Banquet. He looked completely and utterly ridiculous. Tallis rolled her eyes.

"Do you always make jokes like this?" she asked, disappointed at Hawke's stalling of the conversation.

"Uhm...sometimes," Lana replied, smirking.

"_ALL THE TIME_!" Aveline corrected her, irritated.

"Without fail," Varric added, chuckling in agreement.

"Sometimes she makes me laugh so much I almost pee my pants," Merrill chimed in. Everyone turned to stare at her, making her face flush red. Her head dropped and she scuffed the ground with her feet, embarrassed.

"Anyway..." Tallis continued, after the awkward silence, "I can't do this alone. I need your help."

"You want to rob him?" Lana asked.

"This isn't the way I imagined asking but...yeah."

Hawke frowned, "What makes you think I steal things just because people ask me to? I'm not just somebody's puppet."

"Uh-oh," Varric sang, exchanging a nervous glance with Aveline over the anger forming in Hawke's tone.

"Well...I assumed...," Tallis replied, surprised by Hawke's sudden flare of rage. She glanced at Varric who made a face.

"I...uh...I may have talked you up a bit," he said apologetically. "Well, a lot actually..."

Lana placed a hand on her forehead, trying to calm herself. She moved towards Tallis, who looked taken aback.

"Let me get one thing straight," Lana snarled, glaring at the red-head, "I am nobody's puppet. I'm not going to do your dirty work while you sit around sipping champagne and fraternizing with nobles all night."

"Look," Tallis replied, "All I've heard is that you get things done. I'm hoping it's true. Otherwise I'm wasting my time."

"So if we did this it would be together?" Hawke asked, "You're not going to make me shovel the shit while you smell like roses?"

"That's right," Tallis said with a firm nod. Lana considered her for a second. She exhaled.

"So tell me then...what exactly is it you want to steal?"

"It's a..._jewel..._called the Heart of the Many. The Duke thinks its valuable...and it is...just not in the way he believes," Tallis stated, beginning to pace up and down as she recounted the details. "Come with me the Chateau Haine and I'll explain along the way. If, nothing else, you will still get fine wine and fancy company...but I hope you want more than that..."

"I know I do," came a voice from the shadows.

The five of them turned around in surprise, none more so than Lana. Isabela was strolling towards them, a smirk on her face.

"Maker's Breath, about bloody time you showed up!" Aveline scolded her. The pirate gave her a wink.

"What's _she_ doing here?" Lana asked, her voice full of bitterness. Isabela gave her a small smile.

"The Big Girl invited me," she replied gently, "A few days ago..."

If looks could kill, Aveline would have been joining the mercenaries around her and have begun her journey to meet The Maker. Lana glared at her fiercely, furious with the Guardswoman for the situation she had put her in.

"Was this your plan all along?" she yelled at her in disbelief, "Trick me into letting my hair down after months of stress only to bring along the one person I really didn't want to see?"

The guard captain hesitated, guilt apparent on her face. Hawke's jaw tightened and she shook her head in disgust, glancing to Isabela and back again.

"Nice try Av. Maker's Breath, I thought you were my friend... I'm going home. Screw this shit..."

Lana turned and headed in the direction of her Estate, absolutely fuming. She heard calling and heavy footsteps behind her, trying to catch up. Someone grabbed her arm.

"Hawke stop!" Aveline yelled, "STOP!" Hawke turned and glared at her, waiting for her explanation, "Look I...I'm sorry, alright... I only had your best interests at heart, believe me."

Lana shook her off roughly. "My 'best interests'?" she repeated, "My best interests would be to never let me see that woman again. Do you have any idea how much she hurt me? But instead you invite her along on a bloody field trip and expect me to accept it without question...If you thought that was in my best interests Av, then you don't really know me at all."

"I thought it would give you two some time to talk," Aveline countered, "...You know, work things out between you."

"We've done our talking," Lana shouted, feeling her eyes fill with tears. "She played me for a fool, Aveline. She used me, manipulated me then left me to clean up the mess...And why am I even explaining this to you, of all people? Andraste's Ass, you can't even stand her yourself!"

"It's not about me," Aveline hissed, lowering her voice as the others watched from afar. "It's about you, Hawke...I know you love her, but you're too stubborn to admit it."

Lana took a deep breath and shook her head. "You're wrong," she said, lowering her voice.

"Then prove it," Aveline challenged, "If you really believe that, then prove it to yourself. Let her come with us. You don't want to talk then fine...at least you'll know for certain how you feel...and I'll let it drop or good this time."

Hawke continued to glare at her, swallowing over the lump in her throat. She fought against the tears which were threatening to fall down her face and betray how she really felt. Her eyes glanced over at Isabela, who was watching along with the others. The pirate's face was impassive, impossible for Lana to make out what she was thinking. But her eyes were sad. _Is that regret?_ She clearly hadn't expected Hawke to react the way she did. _Well, what did she think I was going to do? Agree wholeheartedly? Welcome her with open arms?...I did that before and look where it got me._

"Fine," Hawke relented, looking back at Aveline, who was watching her, "She can come...But don't expect me to play nice."

"Do I ever?" Aveline replied, giving her a proud smile and a comforting pat on the shoulder. Lana glared at her and gritted her teeth as she rejoined the party, purposely avoiding Isabela's amber eyes which were staring after her as she led them out of Kirkwall.

* * *

"Lovely day for a hunt, don't you agree?"

Lana stared up at the giant, imposing man wielding a battle-axe before her and wasn't at all surprised to see her joke didn't go down well. They had finally made it to the Chateau in the mountains where the party was to take place.

"Umm...very...outdoorsy," she continued nervously, swaying back and forward on the balls of her feet.

"AH! The Champion of Kirkwall!"

Hawke was saved the displeasure of decorating the giant man's blade with her blood as he was ushered aside and replaced by a smaller, greasy-haired man with a ridiculous hat on his head and multi-coloured clothes which just screamed Orlesian. Lana fought the urge to laugh.

"Duke Prosper," she said with a bow in her best noble voice.

"These are honoured guests," the Duke said to the menacing man beside him, "A pleasure to see you again, my Lady. Please excuse my bodyguard...But I must admit, I am surprised to see you, considering the Amells, or rather the Hawke's, are already represented here by another."

"What?" Hawke exclaimed, surprised, "Who?"

"Sister..."

Lana's heart warmed at the sound of a delicate voice to her right. Her jaw dropped as her chocolate-brown eyes met those of her little sister.

"Bethany...?"

Hawke's companions were just as stunned as she was (well, maybe not quite as much).

"Sunshine!" Varric exclaimed, smiling widely.

"Perhaps you should join forces," the Duke continued, "To avoid any appearance of collision between parties."

Hawke was pretty sure the Duke had no idea about the collisions amongst this party. Lana's words were lost as she set eyes on her little sister for the first time since that day in Kirkwall all those years ago when she had thought they would be reunited. Aveline struck up a conversation with the Duke about the hunt that they would take part in, drawing his attention away from the Hawke sisters as they made their way towards each other. The others followed her tact and left Lana and Bethany with some privacy.

"You're the last person in the world I expected to see here," Lana said at last, still not believing her eyes, "I was beginning to think you were no longer alive. I've been so worried!"

"Is that why you never came to see me after the battle?" Bethany replied, in the same harsh tone she had used all those years ago. "Or was it because you had become the most important person in Kirkwall and no longer had any need for a sister in the Circle who brought shame on the family name?"

Lana frowned, "What are you talking about?" she asked, confused, "I didn't say that...I would never say that about you."

"Don't lie to me, Lana," Bethany argued, "The Knight-Commander told me in person..." Her face fell and tears began to build in her eyes, "I was waiting you know...I was sitting in her office waiting for you to appear, Lana..." A tear fell down her cheek as she stared into her sisters eyes, "...but you never came...You promised you would come, but you didn't..."

"I did come!" Hawke exclaimed, her heart breaking as it did every time she saw her little sister cry. She reached out and held her arms, looking down into her face. "I did come for you!...I came as soon as I could, Bethany..."

"Don't lie to me, Lana," Bethany repeated, crying openly now and staring at the ground in defeat.

"Look at me, Sister," she said, shaking her a little, "Bethany...?"The youngest Hawke stared up at her sister, gazing into her eyes through her tears. "I came for you...I promise..."

As Bethany looked into her sisters eyes, she saw there was no lie there. Lana was telling the truth. But it didn't make sense. "Then what happened?" she asked, puzzled. "How come I didn't get to see you?"

"Meredith happened," Lana stated angrily, cursing the bitch for the millionth time, "I didn't know she had gotten to you as well...I should have bloody known." When Bethany still looked confused, Hawke continued. "I was sitting waiting in that exact same office Bethany, waiting eagerly to see you a few days after the battle when I had recovered. The Knight-Commander told me you had changed your mind...That you refused to see me and had instead passed on a message."

"What message?" Bethany asked, not believing her ears, "I didn't send anything!"

Lana made a face. "Well, that was Meredith's work as well," she informed her, "She told me... you blamed me for mother's death and you never wanted to see me again...or something to that effect."

"_What!?_" Bethany exclaimed, "That bitch! I though she was being nice when she comforted me when you never appeared! What a manipulative shrew!"

Lana was fuming even more now. "Ughh, you don't know the half of it, Sister," she said, exhaling, "She's had me in her pocket ever since that day...I'm the reason you have survived this long under her care."

A flash of recognition flashed across Bethany's face. "There have been...looks thrown my way," she told her sister, "By Templars and Mages...only different. The Mages look at me as though they know something I don't, and the Templars are more threatening than ever."

"Anders' contacts most likely," Lana informed her, "I've been trying to keep an eye on you from the outside, but they are afraid to approach you or send any info for fear of bringing the Templar's gaze down upon themselves. We have had little contact but at least I know now they are doing their jobs."

Bethany exhaled, "Well, that's one worry off my mind at least," she said with relief. "I expect Meredith allowed me to come here to keep me out of the way. Of course she never anticipated that you would be here."

Lana shook her head. "Don't trust any of them," she warned, "Some could be working for Meredith as well. That wench is as slippery as they come."

Bethany gave her a small smile," Thanks Sister..."

An awkward silence passed between them. If this had of been years ago, there was no doubt they would have hugged. But they had been apart for so long that a distance had formed between them. A distance which only time would heal. And time was something they didn't have right now.

"Did...Did Meredith have it right, though?" Lana asked, hesitantly, thinking back to her words that day, "Did you...I mean...Was there a part of you that didn't want to see me because of mother?"

Bethany saw the sadness on her sister's face. She dreaded telling her the truth. But she owed it to her at least. They had always been honest with each other. She took a deep breath.

"Yes..."

Although Lana had guessed as much, her face fell and her breath caught in her throat. She covered her mouth with the back of her hand and tried not to let herself fall apart. _I always get the blame...For everything. And now Bethany blames me too._

"I'm sorry, Lana," Bethany whispered, wishing her answer could have been different. "Let's just...Let's just enjoy the party together, yes? I haven't been out of the Circle in so long...And it is good to see you again. Despite our differences, I've missed you."

"And I've missed you," Lana said hoarsely, pulling herself together, "But you're right...Now is not the time for this I suppose...Let's go."

* * *

Hawke and her companions made their way through the nearby forests of Chateau Haine, searching for 'the biggest Wyvern' which would undoubtedly get them into the social gathering inside and score them points with the Duke, lessening his suspicion over them as being something more than simply guests. It was a beautiful day in the Free Marches, the sun shining down on the grounds surrounding the Chateau and accentuating their evergreen beauty.

"So...what exactly does a Wyvern look like?" Isabela asked, from behind Hawke, as they walked together keeping an eye out for the so-called beast.

"Probably something like your last conquest, I imagine," Lana said bitterly. The pirate glared at her.

"Oh, really?" she asked, smirking, "How do you know my last conquest wasn't you?"

Lana snorted, "Three years without sex? How ever would you make your money?"

Bethany, Aveline, Tallis and Merrill all chuckled. Varric looked between his two friends, wishing to The Maker that he wasn't playing piggy in the middle.

"Ha, funny," the pirate replied sarcastically, "Coming from a woman who has no money left because it actually _was_ spent on whores...and that worst part was that she didn't get to have sex with any of them. How is old Gamlen these days?"

More chuckling broke out amongst the travelling party. One a piece the scoreboard read. It appeared they had begun playing a different sort of game now. Hawke scowled, ready with a retort.

"Why don't _you_ tell me?" she countered, throwing her a look, "After all you two have more in common than we ever did...Paying for sex because no one else will have you."

Isabela chuckled, unfazed by the insult. "Well what does that say about you?"

"I seem to remember throwing two sovereigns at you," Lana replied smugly, glad the pirate had taken the bait, "More than you were worth, believe me."

The look on Isabela's face told Lana she had won this round. Hawke stared straight ahead and smiled to herself, taking a grim satisfaction at beating the pirate at her own game. Tallis was looking from both women in amusement, realising that there was something more between them than what met the eye.

"I assume you two have a past?" she asked interestedly, glancing from a scowling Isabela to a gleeful Hawke.

"Well, we certainly don't have a future," Lana responded, trying to sound like she didn't care. The smile slid slowly from her face. Isabela stared at her back, her frown deepening. _Damn it, Hawke...Like this isn't hard for me as well. _Tallis caught the look on Isabela's face and decided to drop the issue. It wasn't really any of her business anyway, and she sensed that the past between the two women wasn't exactly a happy one.

"Look! A Wyvern!" she yelled, spotting one in the distance. It seemed to be chasing two hunters who were running for their lives, screaming comically at the top of their voices.

"That's our cue, people!" Hawke yelled, "Move it!"

The six of them ran forwards at once and engaged the beast in a duel, allowing the other scared hunters to escape. Suddenly it was apparent why they were running. There wasn't just one Wyvern, but four of them.

"Andraste's Ass!" Isabela exclaimed, "What do they feed these things?"

"Probably people, Rivaini," Varric shouted back, firing bolts from Bianca at the nearest beast. "Or vegetables, who knows?"

The pirate chuckled as she charged forwards with the rest of them, withdrawing her daggers and beginning to tear the Wyverns apart. She had missed Varric and his endless wit. Nothing ever seemed to faze him. He was fearless, just like the pirate's former crew on The Siren's Call had been. _Poor buggers, _she thought again, remembering their faces.

After several minutes the last of the Wyvern's were good and dead. Isabela placed her blades at her back once more, after wiping them clean. She glanced up, seeing Lana bending over a fallen Wyvern a short distance away. The pirate found herself in a daze, gazing after her longingly, against her will. It didn't help that she was moist under the scalding sun, a bead of water dropping from her brow a she fought to catch her breath. The pirate's mouth fell open as she watched Lana take a sip of water from her flask, a small dribble slide down her beautiful face and off the end of her chin.

Suddenly something moving behind Hawke in the distance caught the Rivaini's eye. It was a small, spiky-looking creature that she had never seen before in her life. Before she could react, Lana turned and noticed the creature about to attack her. She backed away, instinctively reaching for her dagger on her back. Before she could however, her foot caught a hole in the ground and she lost her balance, falling flat onto her back as the creature ascended.

"Hawke!" Isabela yelled, catching the attention of the others. The pirate ran towards her as fast as she could and managed to reach her just as the creature was about to lunge. Her silver blade swiped through the air and cut the weird-looking beast down, before it could harm a helpless Hawke.

After a moment of stunned silence, Lana looked up, surprised to see her saviour had been Isabela. She looked down and saw her foot was stuck in a tiny hole in the ground. Her ankle was soaring with pain. She must have twisted it when she fell. As Hawke pulled her leg out gingerly, a shadow formed over her. She looked up. Isabela was standing looking down at her with concern. She extended a hand, offering to help her to her feet. Lana looked at her face, then glanced down at her outstretched hand. After a seconds hesitation she dropped her head and got to her feet, ignoring the pirate's offer of assistance. Isabela's hand fell to her side in defeat as she watched Hawke walk away, limping slightly from her fall.

Of course Isabela had missed Hawke the whole time she was away. The woman was still angry with her though, and she had every right to be. But her bitterness was beginning to piss the pirate off a little. All she could do was apologize over and over, and she had done. She couldn't change the past and there was no way she was going to grovel at Hawke's feet if that's what the woman was expecting._ I don't grovel to anyone, least of all Hawke. Let her play the game of insults...I can play dirty too._ Exhaling, Isabela tore her gaze from Lana and joined the party, who were choosing which Wyvern to bring back.

"You alright Hawke?" Varric asked, "Damn Ghast holes."

Hawke burst out laughing, "A what hole?"

"A scholar might call it something else, but they don't know their ghasts from a hole in the ground."

Everyone laughed, bar Aveline.

"I'm going to hit him. I'll do it," she said, shaking her head. Lana rolled her eyes at the Guardswoman.

"Come on, let's get the biggest one and bring it back to the Chateau."

* * *

"These bastards tried to steal my rightful kill!"

Hawke stared angrily at the Orlesian who had been seen running from the Wyverns back in the forest.

"Last time I saw you, you were running from the beast and your pants were on fire," she retorted, as the Duke looked on, "I guess they still are..._Liar_."

"Now, Now!" Duke Prosper interrupted, staring at his Orlesian counterpart, "Is that any way to speak of the Champion of Kirkwall?"

His words seemed to make the man angrier. "This is your fault for inviting a stinking, turnip in the first place!" he yelled, "Your mother would be ashamed!"

Prosper just laughed. "Says the man whose mother has slept with half of Val Chevin," he replied. "My apologies, Champion. Now what would you have me do with this...idiot?"

"You don't mean..." Tallis blurted out. She turned to Lana, a desperate look in her eye. "Just let him go. He can't be more than he is. He's not worth your time, Hawke."

The Duke looked amused at Tallis' mercy. He turned to Hawke for her answer. She turned back to the Orlesian man and considered him. He was glaring at her with dislike.

"Ahh, what do I care?" she replied, "His blood probably smells worse than the Wyverns. Do with him what you will, Duke Prosper. I believe the fine wine in the Keep poses more of a threat to me than he does."

Prosper laughed loudly, "Indeed," he said, "As you wish, Champion. Congratulations on your hunt once more. You may now enter the Chateau with your companions while I deal with this...stain upon my people."

Hawke bowed her head and led her companions towards the grand Chateau Haine. She was envious of the giant walls, wishing she possessed them around her own Estate to keep her numerous admirers from gazing in her windows or hovering around outside waiting to ambush her and pepper her with questions on her battle with the Arishok.

"You let him go?" Tallis asked in shock, walking alongside her, "That was merciful."

"That's Hawke," Isabela interrupted from Lana's other side, "_Merciful."_

"Obviously," Hawke replied, hearing the sarcasm in her voice, "_You're_ still here."

Isabela snorted, "Your words stab more than your daggers, Hawke...but not nearly enough to wound me."

Hawke gritted her teeth and didn't reply.

They reached the Chateau and entered its grand gates for find the real party within. Hawke and her companions headed straight for the wine (well, it was Orlesian after all!) and began to enjoy themselves in the scorcher of a day. As Lana reached out for a glass, her hand covered Isabela's unexpectedly, who had reached for the same one simultaneously. They both looked at each other momentarily, before Hawke cleared her throat and let go, reaching for another one instead and trying to hide how flustered she was becoming. Isabela watched her, staring over the top of her glass as she took a sip of her wine. _What was that all about? I thought she hated me now..._She watched the woman take a drink of her own wine, seeing the sun glance off the sweat on her brow. Either Lana was lying to herself, or that brief moment between them had just been merely awkward for her. The pirate had a feeling she knew which it was. Realising this was good a chance as she was going to get to try and fix things between them, she placed her glass of wine back on the table and made her way towards Hawke, who had joined Aveline who was a few feet in front.

Suddenly out of nowhere, arms wrapped themselves around Isabela's waist from behind. She jumped, and turned in shock to find a familiar face before her.

"Thought you could slip in unnoticed, did you?" the woman asked with a grin.

"Elegant!" Isabela exclaimed, a sly grin appearing on her own face, "Look at you, mingling with the Highborn. People would actually think you belong here in a dress like that."

Lady Elegant laughed and held out her arms, giving the pirate a twirl.

A short distance away, Lana's eyes caught Isabela giving the woman an appraising look, a hunger on her face. It was similar to the way she used to look at her, only not a strong obviously. Hawke's glass hovered in front of her mouth as she froze, watching the scene, then slowly lowered as she lost her thirst. She placed the glass back on the table forcefully and shook her head, feeling angry once more.

"I can't take this anymore," she hissed to Aveline. The Guardswoman glanced over to where Hawke had been looking to see Lady Elegant all over Isabela. She cursed the pirate for wasting this chance she had granted her to make up with Hawke. Lana was fuming. She could feel herself starting to loose it. As Aveline reached out to comfort her she shook her off, her face fuming.

"Just leave me alone, Av," she said, still shaking her head. The Guardswoman could see tears forming in Lana's eyes as she backed away from her, "I told you I didn't want her to come...I can't..."

Not wanting to break down in front of them all, least of all Isabela, Hawke pushed her way blindly through the crowd of nobles, fighting to get as far away as possible. She glanced behind her, still walking, trying to see what Isabela was doing with Elegant, even though it would hurt her even more. Suddenly she walked into someone nearby and tripped up, her swollen ankle aching with pain once more. She hit the ground hard, the nobles scattering as she fell to the floor.

"Ah!" she exclaimed, feeling her hands scrape off the ground as she reached out to save herself. A few of the nearby nobles began to laugh at her misfortune. Suddenly someone spoke.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't see...Are you alright, Miss?"

Lana straightened to a sitting position and stared up at the second-hand that had reached out to pick her off the ground this day. She reached out reluctantly and allowed the woman to help her to her feet.

"Thanks," Lana muttered, embarrassed to look her in the eye. She turned and began to walk away once more when she realised the woman was still holding her hand. Hawke tried to pull out of her grasp, not wanting to mingle with any nobles, especially one she had just run into and when her eyes were ready to overflow with tears. Then the woman spoke.

"Lana...?"

Hawke turned around at once, hearing her first name being uttered by the complete stranger. Her eyes met the woman's then and both their mouths fell open. _Andraste's Ass!_

"Leliana...?"


	26. Chapter 26

Lana was stunned. There, standing before her, dressed in a beautiful, Orlesian pink dress, her red hair glowing in the sun, was Sister Leliana. Before she could say or do anything she was almost knocked over by the force of Leliana's hug. The woman, despite being surrounded by curious onlookers, threw her arms around Hawke tightly, kissing her on the cheek. After several seconds of shock, Lana did the same. _It's been so longer since I've had just a simple hug._

"Andraste's Grace!" Leliana chimed in her ear, overwhelmed, "Oh Maker, I can't believe it! I thought you were dead!"

Lana chuckled lightly and held her close, melting into the woman's warm embrace. The sweet scent of Sister Leliana's perfume wafted under her nose once more, stirring up old feelings and fond memories of some ten years previous. _Maker's Breath! Of all the people to run into! (Literally)_

"I though you were too," Hawke replied, as they released each other. "Then I found out you survived the attack on Lothering." Leliana held her face in her hands, caressing Lana's cheek. She tilted her head, puzzled.

"How? Been spying on me from afar?" she joked, grinning at her. "I thought you weren't interested in Chantry folk."

Lana laughed. After all this time and the woman still remembered her words. Even back then she had hated Templars and the Chantry with a vengeance. Now, her hatred had multiplied tenfold. Meeting Leliana once again was causing her thoughts to be conflicted once more, as had been the case another lifetime ago back in Lothering. Sister Leliana was still as beautiful and charming as Hawke remembered, though something about the woman now was more mature. She seemed a lot more self-assured. Her words still warmed Lana's insides though, as they had done the very first moment she had heard her speak. _I swear it's that accent she has, _Hawke thought to herself, _it's honestly the most attractive one I've ever heard._

"Let's...just say we have a mutual friend," she replied, glancing over Leliana's shoulder towards where Isabela had been standing with Lady Elegant. The two women were gone now. Hawke could feel the anger and jealousy build up inside her once more. _Where did they go? What are they doing? Damn you, Bela! You don't even have to be near me to drive me crazy!_

"Really?" Leliana asked, releasing her and glancing over her shoulder to follow Hawke's preoccupied gaze towards the wine table, "Who?"

"Uh..." Hawke hesitated, not wanting to get into the complicated topic that was Isabela. _Like I want to talk about her anyway. That would be some conversation: 'Hey, guess what! We both had sex with the same pirate whore! Isn't that wonderful?' _

"_..._No one," she finished lamely. Leliana turned back to her, confused.

"'No one?'" she repeated, raising an eyebrow at her. "The person you were running from perhaps?" she joked with a grin.

"...I wasn't _running._..."

Hawke sighed and ran a hand through her hair, feeling stressed and a little overwhelmed by everything that had just happened. _Leliana! Here?...and Isabela...and Bethany! Holy Maker, I need a drink. _The look on Lana's face told Leliana she was right. Suddenly something caught the woman's eye. She reached out and grabbed Hawke's arm, which was still balancing on her head.

"Maker, you're hurt! Why didn't you say?" she exclaimed with concern, turning Lana's hand over to see the bloodied scrapes on her palm where she had tried to save herself from the fall. "And here I've been blabbering on like a fool."

Hawke shrugged, examining her own hand in Leliana's. It was covered in gravel and small spots of blood. The other one was the same way. She glanced down at her knees then and saw that they were slightly dirty as well. But she hadn't even noticed. Her mind was elsewhere, as it had been since the day Isabela showed up in The Hanged Man.

"I'm fine," Lana said embarrassed, feeling the softness of Sister Leliana's delicate fingers as they traced over her hand, cleaning away the dirt. Truth be told, the cuts were stinging a little, but it was nothing she couldn't handle. _I've had worse. Sex with Isabela all those years ago had me rolling about in glass..._ _Stop thinking about her, Lana, _she scolded herself. _Elegant can have her if she wants. Maker why do you do this to yourself? _

Hawke felt a shiver at the gentle hand caressing hers and pulled her hand back at once. Leliana looked up at her, surprised at how distracted and cold she seemed to be now. It wasn't the Lana she remembered from back in Lothering, the cool, collected, mischievous, care-free woman with an impish grin and twinkling eyes. Instead the woman before her seemed harsher, full of worry and above all else...tense. It was strange to see.

"Is...everything alright?" Leliana asked, her eyes narrowing. Lana seemed like she was on edge...or maybe pushed over it. "I...I thought you'd be happy to see me."

"I _am_," Lana replied truthfully, her eyes keeping glancing over to the spot where Isabela had been moments before. She exhaled and finally looked back into the Sister's blue eyes. "...It's just...bad timing...that's all."

"Bad timing?" Leliana asked, chuckling. "We were at a party, last time I checked. As good a time as any, don't you think?"

After several seconds Hawke smiled as best she could. Leliana was had a point. She was here to try to relax (and to steal a jewel)...and also to prove to Aveline that she was over Isabela so as the Guardswoman would stop hassling her over it. _Only instead she saw me slam a glass of wine onto a table and then slam face first against the ground...Way to show everyone you're over her, Lana! Well played._

"I guess you're right," she admitted, sighing. "I'm sorry. I really am happy to see you. It's been too long."

"Don't worry," Leliana said taking her by the arm. "Let's go get you cleaned up. We can't have you walking around the nobles dressed like this. Then we can talk properly."

* * *

Isabela followed after Lady Elegant who was leading her by the hand to her room at the end of a long corridor inside Chateau Haine. She never really liked being lead around (unless leashes were involved), but this time the pirate had a feeling that something else was making her reluctant to follow this beautiful woman to her quarters and have sex with her (as she had done on may occasions).

"Stop dragging you feet, Bela," Elegant scolded as the Rivaini slowed her pace, "I know you like to play games but we don't have time. The Duke will be wondering where I am."

"Well, look at you 'Queen of the Nobles'," Isabela mocked, slowing up even more. "I don't care how far up the Duke's ass you are though, nobody tells _me_ what to do."

Elegant turned back to her and grinned cheekily, "We'll see," she replied firmly. The pirate chuckled. Lady Elegant really loved a challenge. _Makes me wonder why she always chooses me, _Isabela thought to herself, _I don't exactly play hard to get. _

They finally reached Elegant's room. She dragged the pirate inside and shut the door. Isabela looked around the room with distaste. It was _so _Orlesian. Everything was in order, silk sheets on a large four-poster bed, freshly cut flowers sitting in a decorative vase on the nightstand, the smell of a scented candle burning nearby and a large fur rug strewn across the floor in front of an impressive mantle piece. _Ugh, I think I'm going to vomit. _The pirate was a sucker for expensive things (to steal) but this type of decor was too much. She preferred places like The Hanged Man, run-down, old, and dirty. At least then there was always a story to tell. This room looked like it had never even been used before. _How boring._

When the pirate turned back around, her eyes were greeted with a treat.

"You don't waste much time," Isabela said, grinning, her eyes scanning the now completely naked Lady Elegant whose dress was lying in a heap on the floor along with her under garments.

"And you're wasting a lot," Elegant answered, pressing herself up against the pirate at once. Isabela caressed the woman's smooth sides, hearing a gasp of desire from her.

"Maybe you should punish me," Isabela replied cheekily, gazing at her. Elegant smiled and leaned in, placing her lips on hers. Their mouths moved together, lustful, hands exploring each other from all angles. Elegant backed Isabela across the room, towards the direction of the bed. Before they could reach it however, an extraordinary thing happened.

Isabela pulled back.

"What is it?" Elegant asked, shocked. "Did you hear something?"

She half glanced towards the door, as though waiting for someone to burst in. Isabela didn't answer. Her forehead creased into a frown. She stared at nothing in particular, frozen, lost in thought.

"I..."

"What!" Elegant demanded, getting a little impatient, "What's the matter with you? You're acting really strange today. Normally you can't wait to take my clothes off. I had to do it myself this time!"

The pirate glared at her, "Nothing's the matter with me!"

"Well why did you stop?" Elegant asked. Not waiting for an answer she threw herself at the busty pirate again, trying to press her down onto the bed. Isabela lost her balance and found Elegant lying on top of her. _Oh balls, I'm in trouble! _The woman leaned down and began to kiss her again, eager to get her fill. Isabela kissed her back, giving into her greatest weakness and her greatest strength: Sex. She couldn't escape while Elegant straddled her on the bed, trying desperately to relieve her of her clothes. _Bugger, I don't want to do this! __**Yes, you do**__, No I don't! __**You love it! You love how it feels to have someone at your mercy like this**_**! **_I do...I love it...But I don't love Elegant..._

Isabela rolled over until she was on top, pinning the naked woman below her. Lady Elegant grinned up at her, thinking she was just taking control lie she normally would. To her complete and utter shock, Isabela however, straightened up and climbed off her. The pirate stood up and grabbed her black corset from the floor and began to put it on.

"_Isabela!?_ What-"

"I have to go," the Rivaini replied, not looking at her.

"You can't be serious," Lady Elegant replied with a snort, "_You _are passing up sex? Sex with _me_!?"

"I've had better, Elegant," Isabela replied, tying her red bandana around her arm again, "Don't flatter yourself."

"Don't you dare talk to me like that, you filthy whore!" she exclaimed angrily. Isabela chuckled.

"You're one to talk," she replied, amused, "You may wear fancy dresses and walk about with a silver spoon up your ass, but you're no better than the rest of us. You're a slut, Elegant...and an 'elegant' slut at that."

The pirate laughed at her own joke and began to put on her boots. Lady Elegant straightened up off the bed, her temper flaring.

"If this is about that tramp Hawke..." she began.

Isabela snorted, "As if," she replied, "Hawke and I were finished long before we even started..."

Elegant silently agreed, but she has a feeling Isabela wasn't being entirely truthful (when was she ever?).

"Good thing too, seeing as I saw the Champion outside hugging and kissing some red-haired woman."

"What!?" Isabela exclaimed, pausing and looking up at her in disbelief. Elegant smiled evilly, knowing she had hit her mark.

"It's true," she continued, leaning back on her elbows and crossing her long legs, "As we were coming here I glanced back and saw them holding hands... then they were hugging...and then they kissed."

Isabela started to feel jealous in spite of herself. Who was this mysterious woman? A random person? Someone Hawke knew? Someone she had been with during the years Isabela had been gone? _I bet she's just doing it to make me jealous, _she thought bitterly, _She probably wanted me to see..To react to it. Why else would she do it here, in front of everyone? _The pirate slammed her fist on the nearby dresser in anger.

"That bitch!" she exclaimed, shaking her head.

Elegant got to her feet and walked towards her, placing her arms around her waist from behind.

"Aww, is Isabela in love?" she teased, kissing her neck.

"Oh, shut up Elegant!" she said, trying to hide her pain. She put on her usual mask and turned around, grinning in her usual way. "I don't fall in love, you know that."

Elegant smirked back, running her tongue along her bottom lip, seductively. That was exactly what she wanted to hear. "So why are you so angry?" she asked, running an enticing finger along Isabela's jaw line and across the pirate's lips. "You should relax...Or maybe...I can help you relieve that anger..." She leaned in closer, "Forget about Hawke, Bela...because she's certainly forgotten all about you..." She kissed her lips lightly, "I know what you need...Better than she ever will..."

* * *

"There, all clean. How does it feel?"

Lana laughed and looked up at Leliana who had just treated her wounds. The woman was looking down at her concerned.

"It's just a few scratches, Leliana. I think I can handle it," she replied, amused.

Leliana chuckled too. "Sorry," she said, "I'm overreacting a little, I know...I'm still finding it hard to believe you're alive, Lana."

The woman deposited the dirty bandages on a nearby table (which were then scooped up by an elven slave) and seated herself down beside Lana on the edge of the fountain in the middle of the garden of Chateau Haine. She then held out a glass of champagne for her which Hawke took eagerly. Lana had never tried it before. She held the slim glass to her mouth and tasted a sip, wrinkling her nose at the tickling sensation of the bubbles.

"Well, what do you think?" Leliana asked, after watching her try it.

"Not bad," Lana replied, nodding, "Though I think I'd still prefer a jigger of whiskey over it any day of the week."

Leliana laughed, "Fereldens," she said, shaking her head. They sat in silence for a few seconds, soaking up the sun and the surrounding scenes. There were nobles of all statuses mingling in the courtyard. Tallis was nowhere to be seen, though Lana assumed she was off hunting for a way into the Duke's vault. Aveline and Merrill were chatting beside the nearest wine cask while Varric was sniffing different cheeses from platters at the far side of the Chateau with Bethany, who was laughing at his reactions. Lana was so glad to see her sister smile again. This whole trouble with Meredith had become a blessing in disguise as it had enabled her with another chance to see her little sister again. Not to mention spend some time with her, which didn't involve killing bandits or the like. And they had at last got a chance to talk and work through some of their issues. Their broken relationship was finally on the mend.

"So..." Leliana began, turning back to Lana, "Are you going to tell me how you made it here? The last I heard almost all of the soldiers had died at Ostagar when Teryn Loghain betrayed King Cailen."

Lana froze. She had never spoken of Ostagar to anyone ever, not even Carver. It had been like an unspoken rule between them. Of course it didn't last long as he died soon after they escaped from the battlefield, but even with Aveline it was never brought up. There were no pleasant memories to talk about. Neither of them had ever acknowledged that the other was there. Many didn't even know Lana had been, and that was how she wanted to keep it. Although she had killed many people in the last number of years, seen many brutal things...Ostagar was like a sickened, poisonous, black spot in her mind which she had locked away completely for fear of what dwelling on the memories would do to her.

"Maybe I shouldn't have brought it up..." Leliana said, seeing the dead look in Hawke's eyes. After a minute of so, Lana finally found her voice.

"I ran North with my little brother...when the Darkspawn overwhelmed us..."

"And you reached Lothering?" Leliana pressed. Lana nodded.

"But we were too late...The village was already in flames by the time we got there...I found my mother and sister and we left with a few others. We had family here so that's why we chose the Free Marches to outrun the Blight...But my brother didn't make it...He died just outside Lothering."

"I'm sorry, Lana. He was a sweet boy," Leliana said sadly. "And Bethany? Your mother?"

Lana sighed. It still hurt to think of everything she had lost. "They got here safely but...a few years later my mother died... and Bethany was put in the Circle."

"The Circle?" Leliana asked shocked, "Bethany is a mage? Andraste's Grace, I had no idea!"

Lana grinned cheekily at her, feeling a little smug. "Why else do you think I kept popping up at the Chantry to keep an eye on her? You're stories weren't _that_ good, you know."

"I thought it was to see me actually," Leliana said honestly, feeling stupid now. She giggled. "Oh, how wrong was I?"

Both women began to laugh then.

"Ah, you weren't all that, Sister," Lana joked. "I've had better."

Leliana laughed, "Oh don't lie, Lana. You never were much good at it. I knew the first day we met you had no intentions of having a drink with me. That was why I decided to go to the tavern myself...and surprise, surprise there you were."

They both started to laugh again, remembering the time they spent together that night in Lothering. Lana never looked at a windmill the same way ever again. It had been an incredible experience, one that she would never forget and she was sure Leliana would never forget it either. A member of the apostate family seducing a member of the Chantry and living to tell the tale. _Oh, I should give Varric that as a story title and see what he comes up with, _Hawke though, laughing inwardly. That would make for some great entertainment during future drinking sessions at The Hanged Man.

"Anyway, I had originally thought you didn't make it out either, Leliana," Hawke continued, remembering, "I could see the Chantry burn from atop of the mountains as we fled for our lives. I almost went back for you...Of course I know now that you met the Hero of Ferelden and left before the Darkspawn reached Lothering. Not to mention helped her to save the world."

A dark shadow appeared on Leliana's face. This didn't go unnoticed by Hawke.

"What's wrong?" she asked, curious. _Was it something I said? _Leliana sighed. She didn't know where to begin.

"I...um..."

Hawke then realised where she was going with this.

"I already know you two are together," she said, helping her along. Leliana looked up in surprise. "Mutual friend, remember?" Hawke added with a smile. Leliana laughed a little.

"Are you ever going to tell me who this mutual friend is? They sound like they've been stalking me during the Blight."

"I think you'll find out sooner or later," Lana replied grimly, wishing she wouldn't. "Anyway...how come you're here alone? Where is this Hero now? A woman like that, I'd be showing her off to the world."

Leliana's sadness deepened. "I...I would be to. She is dear to my heart but...She disappeared...a few years back and...well, I have no idea why or where."

Hawke immediately regretted her words. "I'm sorry," she said, holding Leliana's hand in hers and squeezing it tightly. Leliana smiled, looking into her eyes.

"Don't worry," she said, "It was a while ago now. I still miss her though."

"And...you still love her?...Even though she just left without a word?" Lana asked in surprise. Sister Leliana's smile widened.

"Of course I do," she replied, as though there was no other possible answer. "The time apart doesn't change anything. It's the time we spent together that matters. And I know that wherever she is she still loves me too. We just had to go our separate ways...that's all...We both had different callings...mine with the Chantry...hers with the Grey Wardens."

Hawke was stunned at Leliana's words. She stared into the bubbling champagne in her glass, her thoughts falling on Isabela once more. _Maybe Aveline was right...maybe I do still love her. Maybe what Leliana said is true as well...that time spent apart doesn't matter...But can I trust Isabela again? _That was the real question. The fact that the pirate had just walked off with Elegant told Lana otherwise. Although Lana had never met the Hero of Ferelden she could see her situation and Leliana's were quite similar. The only difference was that one relationship had trust, whereas the other had always lacked it.

"So, I'm guessing from that look on your face that there's someone in your life too?" Leliana said, ending her sentence on a high note and staring at Hawke expectantly.

Lana hesitated. "There...used to be..." she answered sadly. "I didn't really work though...I don't even know if _I'm_ cut out for this relationship crap, never mind her...I thought I was but...Oh I don't know..."

Leliana began to laugh. "Well, going by how you acted all those years ago in Lothering I have to say I would never have expected it of you."

Both women began to chuckle then. Hawke's mind rewinded back to the days when she would run around in secret, bedding a few of her sister's friends behind her back along with a few other local women (sometimes at the same time). Reflecting on it now, it was actually an amazing feat that none of her family ever found out the true nature of her sexuality sooner. _Actually, coming to think about it... I still don't think Bethany knows. _She hadn't seen her little sister in years and well...she didn't exactly ever bring it up before hand either.

"What was the name of that woman?" Leliana asked, lost in her own memories, "Remember? The shrill, little girl you were with that night in the tavern."

Hawke screwed up her face, trying to remember. She shook her head. "You'll have to be more specific," she said with a smirk, "I've been with so many girls in that tavern."

Leliana chuckled, "You know, the one who kept spilling wine over you..."

"Allison!" Lana exclaimed, covering her mouth as recognition overcame her, "Maker's Breath, I'd forgotten all about her."

"How ever did you manage it?" Leliana asked, chuckling.

"Well, I have different memories of that night," Hawke said, winking at her. Leliana's face flushed red then. She cleared her throat and glanced off into the distance, taking a sip of her champagne. Hawke straightened up, staring at her.

"Are you embarrassed?" she teased, chuckling slightly.

"No!" Leliana replied, defensively.

"Aww, you're blushing!" Hawke said laughing even more.

"Oh, stop it," Leliana said laughing too. She punched her on the arm lightly. "You tease..." The woman sighed, "You haven't changed a bit, Lana Hawke," she said, gazing at her. "I can see you're still the same person underneath all that strain you are carrying around. I gather that the years we've been apart haven't been kind to you. What happened to make you this way?"

Lana's smile faltered. She sat her glass down on the edge of the fountain and shook her head, getting to her feet. "You don't know the half of it, Leliana...and how lucky for you..."

She felt Leliana's hand on her arm then as the woman followed her and placed herself behind her. "Hey," she soothed. Lana turned to look at her, trying not to let her resistance crumble. Leliana touched her face. "Don't use whatever has happened to you as an excuse to hide who you really are. I did the same thing all those years ago in Lothering... I was hiding in the Chantry. You were the only person who saw right through it...and you saved me from that dark path I was headed. That, above all else was the reason I left with the Grey Wardens on their quest when they passed through Lothering. I didn't want to force myself to belong there anymore just because I was afraid of the alternative. In a way, I...I suppose you saved my life, Lana...I guess now it's my turn to return the favour, yes?"

The two women smiled at each other. After several seconds their faces inched closer together. Just as their lips almost met, both women hesitated. They pulled back simultaneously. Hawke exhaled.

"Maybe going down that road again isn't the best idea," she said, "Not when we have others on our minds."

"I agree," Leliana said, smiling at her, understanding. Hawke smiled back and both women wrapped their arms around each other, hugging the other tightly.

"It's _so _good to see you again, Leliana," Hawke said quietly in her ear.

"And you," she heard her reply. "I thought about you for so long...You have no idea how happy I am to find out you're alive. I prayed to The Maker that you were safe. He must have watched over you."

Lana chucked. "If he has been then can you tell him to stop?" she joked. "It's been a bloody difficult ride since I left Lothering all those years ago."

"I'll let him know," she replied.

Both women chuckled, still holding each other tight. It felt good just to hold each other, each lost in their own thoughts and memories.

Suddenly a rough hand pulled Lana back.

"Doing this for my benefit, are you? Well, it's working alright!"

Hawke was spun around roughly until she came face to face with a furious-looking Isabela. She could smell the alcohol on her breath. But the pirate could still carry herself. She didn't seem drunk but she certainly wasn't sober either.

"Get your hands off me," Lana spat, glaring at her, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, _please_," Isabela said loudly, attraction several onlookers. "Was this your plan with the Big Girl all along then? Get her to invite me here, under the pretext of a party only to find the first wench you set eyes on then use her to get back at me? It's pathetic!"

"WHAT!?" Lana exclaimed. More people were starting to stare now. Aveline and the others had begun to make their way through the crowd towards the scene.

"You heard me!" Isabela yelled.

"Why would I go out of my way to hurt someone like that?" Hawke asked, getting angry herself now, "That's your job isn't it? Steal any more Qunari relics lately?"

"Don't turn this around on me!" the pirate said, "I didn't think you of all people would stoop to something as petty as revenge, Hawke...I thought you were better than that."

"Look who's talking," Lana shouted, laughing bitterly, "Is the pirate whore giving out lessons on decency now? Ha! That's a first."

"Look, I know what I did was wrong," Isabela said, her amber eyes piercing Hawke's, "But I don't know what you want from me anymore. Andraste's tits, I said I was sorry, more times than I care to admit, more times than I've ever apologised to anyone...But it's still not enough? Don't think this isn't hard on me as well, Hawke."

"I'm still not entirely sure what I've done wrong!" Hawke replied, feeling ashamed even though she had no reason to. _Isabela was taking this hard as well? I thought the woman was dead inside when it came to her feelings for me._

"Elegant saw you kissing _her_," the pirate said, pointing to a stunned Leliana who had just walked out from behind Lana. Her mouth fell open as she realised who it was.

"Isabela!?"

The Rivaini turned to her then, looking at her face for the first time, having missed it before in her blind rage.

"Leliana?" she asked, equally as shocked. "Maker's Breath, You look...different..."

"Don't we all?" Leliana replied with a smile.

At the sight of her, the pirate's imagination ran wild in her inebriated state. She turned back to Hawke. "Oh I get it," she said, nodding her head.

"Get what!?" Lana demanded, genuinely confused as to what she had done to warrant this behaviour from the Rivaini.

"You thought to get back at me by kissing Leliana," Isabela spat disgustedly, "Maybe even sleeping with her again...Well, it didn't bloody work did it?"

"Oh, go sleep it off, Bela," Lana replied, feeling tears well in her eyes, "I can't believe you would even think me capable of planning something that hurtful, or that ridiculous. I've spent the majority of this trip trying desperately to avoid you. I can't stand the sight of you anymore, because ever time I see you it just reminds me of what a fool I was for ever loving you in the first place."

Isabela breathed a laugh, "If you loved me as much as you said, how come you still can't forgive me?" she asked. "Don't talk bullshit, Hawke. You used me as much as I used you."

"You want to know why?" Lana asked, feeling the eyes of almost the entire party on her. "You really want to know why I can't forgive you!?"

"YES!" the pirate yelled, "Because for the life of me, Hawke, I don't bloody understand it."

"Then let me tell you!" Lana spat, furiously. "I was the only person in the entire world who trusted you. I was the only one who looked past your flaws and gave you a chance...Everyone else told me you were scum, that I should stay away. But did I?...No... I let you in, I trusted you at my back...I fell in love with you against my better judgement...then you went right around and proved them all right. You made me look like a fool, Bela...just like you are doing once again...So I guess you haven't changed at all since you've been away. Now tell me, how, in all of Thedas can I forgive you if you're still the same damn person who screwed me over all those years ago and left me without a seconds thought?"

Isabela simply stared at her, not knowing what to say. The entire courtyard was stunned into silence. Lana fought back against the tears which were threatening to spill down her cheeks. She could see that the pirate was hurting as well, but the woman was way to cold to show any sign of emotion. After several seconds Isabela finally found her voice.

"Fine...If that's what you think..." she replied, her jaw tightening, "But don't expect me to apologise for who I am, Hawke...You already knew what I was when you fell in love with me... So how can that have changed because of what I did? But forget it, I hope you and Leliana are very happy together."

"I'm not bloody sleeping with Leliana again!" Lana yelled at her in frustration.

"You slept with Leliana?"

Everyone's gaze fell upon on Hawke's companions who had finally made their way to the commotion between Isabela and Lana. Hawke's blood ran cold as she saw who was at the head of the party. Her eyes traced over the familiar features, making her wish to The Maker that the ground wound open and swallow her up.

Bethany stared back at her older sister in disbelief.


	27. Chapter 27

"Bethany!?" Leliana exclaimed in disbelief. She was just as overwhelmed to see her again, as she had been with Lana.

"Leliana?" Bethany replied, even more stunned. She looked from her sister to Isabela, then back again. "What the-If someone doesn't tell me what's going on right now-"

"I'm sorry you had to find out this way," Lana said, regretfully. Bethany's face was even more perplexed.

"I-I-Find what out?" she asked, shaking her head, becoming more confused by the second. "I mean...you and...and Isabela...then Leliana! Here!...sleeping together...I..._What!?_"

The entire party stared between the four women, unsure of what exactly was going on. Aveline was glaring at Isabela, furious with her for her outburst. She had never expected this, even of her. But the pirate never could pass up making a scene. And now Hawke was in more shit than she had ever been in her life (and that was saying something). She didn't deserve this, and even Isabela knew it. The pirate saw the look on Bethany's face...on Hawke's. She had never meant for any of this to happen. She was just so angry at Lana for what she was apparently doing with Leliana. Like it or not, she was jealous. Her pride had gotten the better of her and she wanted to see Lana humiliated, the way she had been after the amount of apologies she had made for her past screw ups. _No one makes me grovel like that! No one makes me feel guilty for being who I am. I'm not going to apologise for being myself. Filthy hypocrites!_

As it turned out though, Lady Elegant had been spinning her a tale from the very beginning, simply trying to seduce her. The woman didn't take it well at all when Isabela passed up on sex with her and left her naked in the fancy bedroom, even after she thought Hawke had been kissing another woman to get back at her. In the end she just couldn't do it. She hadn't been lying when she told Hawke that she had been her last 'conquest'. _Pathetic! Three years hung up on the same person who can't even look at me anymore... What happened to you Isabela? Queen of the Eastern Seas, my ass! _

Elegant's threat still lingered in the pirate's mind, the bitter words she had yelled after her as she ran back down the hallway as fast as she could for fear she would give in to Elegant's demands and her own weakness of never being able to say no. _Not a good idea to make an enemy of a woman who handles poisons on a daily basis. I'll need to watch what I drink in future._ Despite this warning thought, the pirate had downed four glasses of red wine as soon as she rejoined the party, trying to rid her mind of Lana Hawke and all that came with her. Of course, all the alcohol did was intensify the Rivaini's thoughts, and cause her to spill her guts to a confused Lana in front of the entire party, before revealing the secret of Hawke's sexuality to an unknowing family member yet again. _Balls...I should never have come back to Kirkwall._

"Look Bethany, it's not what you think..." Isabela began, trying to undo her blunder. "Lana and I are just..." Her words faded into nothing. She didn't know what they were anymore.

"We should have told you," Leliana continued, in her delicate Orlesian accent. "But it was difficult. I was with the Chantry and..."

"I thought you were my friend," Bethany said to Leliana, hurt, "I cried for you when we left Lothering, thinking you were dead...and all this time..."

"It wasn't like that!" Leliana said, shaking her head, "I'm so sorry, Bethany. I was your friend, I still am!... What I had with your sister was just something else entirely."

Lana saw the unforgiving look in her little sister's eyes. She couldn't find the words to explain this all to her. The lies, the deceit, the back stabbing...Maybe she was no better than Isabela when it came to screwing over those she cared about. _Maybe that's why I was attracted to her in the first place. We're not all that different, even now. _Bethany looked at her again, as though wondering why she hadn't said anything more.

"Lana?" she asked, waiting expectantly.

Hawke felt the eyes of every single person in the courtyard on her. She was burning under their gaze. A bead of sweat dropped down her forehead which she wiped away with the back of her hand.

"Let's talk in private, Bethany," she said, almost pleading with her.

"No," Bethany replied firmly, her voice as cold as ice. "Whatever you have to say, you can say it here."

"Maybe that's not the best choice, Bethany," Aveline interrupted, "She's right. Go and talk some place quiet."

"Why? What else has she got to hide?"

"Bethany..." Aveline said placing a gentle hand on her arm. She nodded at her in encouragement. Bethany's jaw tightened. She was so angry. She stared at Aveline, then at Varric who also nodded. After several seconds she sighed.

"Fine," she said, turning back to her sister. "You have ten minutes...Then I'm gone...Forever this time."

Lana stared at her dejectedly. _Forever?_ The word cut her deeply. _I never wanted this._ Hawke turned to Leliana helplessly, wondering what she should do. The woman saw the fear in Lana's brown eyes. She was scared out of her wits at what would happen when she entered what might be her final conversation with all that was left of her family. Leliana wished to The Maker that she could help her out. Apparently the once beautiful relationship between the two sisters had soured over the years. Leliana had never heard Bethany sound so cold. It was so different from the cheerful, charming little girl she had been in the past. It was such a shame it had come to this.

As Lana made to follow after Bethany, Isabela reached out and grabbed her arm. Hawke shook her off roughly and rounded on her, her eyes stinging with tears. She could see the regret in the pirate's eyes but found she had little sympathy for her.

"Hawke, I..."

Lana shook her head slowly, staring at her in disgust.

"What did I ever do to you?" she asked weakly.

Isabela swallowed over a lump in her throat. She could feel her own eyes filling up at the simple question. _No, not here! Not in front of all these people! _When it became apparent that the pirate wasn't going to reply, Hawke gave her one last look and turned her back on her, following Bethany towards the gates of Chateau Haine.

* * *

As soon as the two sisters disappeared, the entire party turned their gaze to Isabela. She glared back at them all, feeling about an inch tall. The Rivaini could see the judgemental stares, see the disapproving expressions upon the faces of the nobles, and even those of her friends.

"WHAT?" she yelled, holding out her arms, her fury getting the better of her. "WHAT ARE YOU ALL STARING AT?"

The crowd began to mutter to each other, seeing the crazed look on the pirate's face. Some began shaking their heads.

"DON'T YOU DARE JUDGE ME!" Isabela shouted, pointing her finger at them. "NONE OF YOU ARE ANY BETTER, HEAR ME? NONE OF YOU!...Bastards!"

As the muttering continued, Isabela turned to Leliana, shaking in fury. The alcohol had almost worn off now and she knew she would regret this in the morning. Andraste's Ass, she regretted it already. But it couldn't be undone. And she couldn't take the nobles staring any longer. As Leliana made to reach out to her, the pirate ignored her outstretched arm and began to walk away.

"Isabela!" Leliana cried after her, watching her run off towards the giant double doors of the Chateau entrance, "Isabela, wait!"

The pirate didn't look back.

* * *

"So how long has this been going on for?" Bethany asked, as Lana closed the gates to Chateau Haine. Night had fallen around them without anyone noticing. The lanterns by the entrance were full of dancing flames, which reflected off the tears in Lana's eyes.

"You mean how long with Leliana?" she asked, "There was never a relationship to begin with."

"I mean how long have you been sleeping with women!?" Bethany corrected, angrily.

Lana sighed, "Always..."

Bethany shook her head in disbelief and sat herself down on a nearby rock. She didn't speak for several seconds. Finally she looked up, her harsh expression having softened a little.

"Why didn't you tell me, Lana?" she asked, her voice finally returning to its normal level. "I thought we told each other everything...I told you everything. Why would you hide something that important about yourself from me?"

Hawke exhaled and sat herself down beside her sister, staring at the ground. She shrugged.

"I don't know," she replied, truthfully, "I guess I...thought you wouldn't approve or...I don't know, disown me. Mother already thought I was a stain on the family, I didn't need to give her another reason...And if I thought there was a chance I would lose you Bethany, I never wanted to take that risk...You're my best friend, or...at least you were."

Bethany felt pity for her older sister. "This isn't exactly how I imagined we would be when we grew up," she admitted, "But a lot has happened over the last number of years. We're different people now, Lana."

Lana looked up at her. "I never once forgot about you Bethany," she revealed, wondering why her sister was saying these things, "No matter how much I changed over the years I always tried to do what was best for you, even when you were in the Circle. Maker's Breath, I'm handing apostates over to the Templars under Meredith's orders just to keep you alive!"

"What!" Bethany exclaimed in disbelief. Her sister was working with Templars...for her?

"Exactly!" Lana exclaimed, getting to her feet as her anger flared, "And now all because of my sexuality you are going to turn your back on me?...Make's me wonder why I even bother..."

"That's not why I'm angry!" Bethany yelled, getting to her feet as well. "Maker's Breath, Lana! I'll always love you no matter what your interests. Just because you prefer women to men doesn't change that fact!"

Hawke turned back to her in shock, "Really?" she asked.

"Really," Bethany assured her. "I just don't understand why you couldn't tell me this before...Maybe we weren't as close as I'd thought after all..."

"You weren't exactly completely truthful with me either!" Lana countered. Why did she always have to be the one who 'screwed up'?

"Since when!?" Bethany demanded, "When have I ever lied to you like this? You hid your true self from me for all the time I have known you. You slept with my friends behind my back! You've been living two separate lives, Lana!...and apparently I don't fit into either of them!"

"You lied to me about Anders," Lana said quietly. Bethany hesitated. Her sister had hit the nail on the head. "You promised me you would stay away from him, Bethany. You promised me you wouldn't have anything to do with his manifesto...And look what happened..."

"You were just angry with me because I disobeyed you!" Bethany challenged. Hawke was outraged.

"How dare you!" she exclaimed. "Everything I did was to protect you! To keep you safe from the blasted Templars!"

"Bullshit!" Bethany spat, "They would have found me eventually. It was sheer luck that they didn't before, nothing more!"

"You can't be serious!" Lana replied, her blood boiling, "I worked my ass of trying to keep you out of the Circle...All my bloody life, Bethany!"

"Well, maybe you should have just let me go!" Bethany yelled. Lana was stunned. She exhaled, catching her breath and sat herself back down on the rock. She ran a hand through her hair and looked up at her little sister.

"Is that really what you would have wanted?" she asked gently, "To have grown up in the Circle with your own kind...To have never known me as anything other than a name in your file?"

Bethany sighed, staring at her sister regretfully. "That's not what I meant, Lana," she replied, lowering her voice as well. She sat down beside her once more and placed a hand on her arm. Lana ignored it.

"Isn't it?...You know what, I'm glad we had this chance to get everything out in the open," she said hoarsely. She got to her feet and walked away a few paces before turning back to her sister. It took her a while to speak over the lump in her throat. "At least now I know what you really think of me, Bethany. Now I can stop worrying about you everyday...Because it's clear to me now, since the day the Templars took you, you've never even given me a seconds thought."

Bethany didn't know how to respond. It was true she had cursed Lana the day she found out their mother was dead. But that didn't mean she had stopped loving her. Taking her silence as a sign, Hawke reached under the collar of her shirt and pulled the red bandana from around her neck, holding it in her hand.

"You once gave me this for luck, remember?" she asked, painfully, staring down at it. Bethany was astounded. She had no idea her sister still had it after all these years.

"Lana..." she breathed, realising then just how much her sister had missed her. She had given it to her just before Hawke had left for The Deep Road's Expedition. Ever since that day their entire lives had been turned upside down. A tear fell down Bethany's face, followed by many more. In that moment she regretted how cold she had been to the only person who had loved her unconditionally her entire life.

Lana's fist closed around the bandana. She snorted and looked back up at her sister's tear stained face.

"I suppose you'll want it back then, since I clearly don't mean anything to you anymore...I only wore it ever single damn day that you were gone..."

She tossed the bandana at her sister's feet giving her one last look. With that, Lana turned her back on her little sister and walked back towards the party.

"Lana?...LANA!"

Hawke ignored Bethany's numerous cries after her with great difficulty, fighting the urge to turn around. But she was done.

"LANA PLEASE!..._PLEASE!"_

Hawke wiped away the tear which had streamed down her cheek. Her sister could call all she wanted though. She couldn't take it anymore. This time it was her who was walking away.

* * *

"Rough night?"

Tallis appeared around a dark corner inside the Chateau Haine, seeing Isabela sitting against a wall, doing nothing in particular. The pirate looked up at her and smiled as best she could. Truth be told she would rather be left alone.

"Where'd you get off to?" she asked, seeing the mischievous look on the elf's face. She knew that look. It was the look one wore when they had discovered treasure. Tallis seated herself down beside her, wiping away a layer of sweat on her forehead. She was breathing heavily as though she had been running. The elf dangled a key in front of her face.

"I found the vault," she informed Isabela, smirking at her.

"Took you long enough," the pirate teased, "I'd have sniffed it out in a second. I'm pretty sure that key doesn't fit other wise you wouldn't be sitting here empty-handed with me."

"The key only leads us there. I assumed you had more experience stealing things which don't belong to you," Tallis replied with a grin. Isabela groaned.

"So you've heard then?" she asked, knowing full well what she was getting at.

"You're the one who stole the Qunari relic right? The Tome of Koslun?"

Isabela nodded. "That's right. What of it?"

"Did you read it?" Tallis asked interestedly.

"In between running for my life? Of course I did," Isabela replied, sarcastically.

"Ah, sarcasm is one of the many demands of the Qun, did you know that?"

"No it isn't," Isabela replied. Tallis chuckled.

"So you did read it, then."

Isabela rolled her eyes. _She got me there. _

"So how come you're sitting here on your own in the semi-darkness?" Tallis asked, "I take it this Orlesian party was no different than all the rest? They are pretty boring."

The pirate snorted. "On the contrary, I think this little gathering will be remembered for years to come...And that's even before you steal this jewel. I can only assume the nobles were entertained."

Tallis chuckled. "What happened? Did someone mix up one of the cheeses and cause an uproar?"

Isabela sniggered. "That's one way to describe it, I suppose," she joked. After several seconds Tallis noticed her face fall. The pirate sighed and stared at the ground.

"So I assume it had something to do with you and Hawke then?" the elf guessed. Isabela was wearing the same look as she had done earlier that day when she and Hawke had been bickering on the Wyvern hunt. Only now she looked ten times worse.

"None of your business," Isabela replied, feeling no desire to talk about it. Tallis snorted.

"Suit yourself. If it was as eventful as you've described though I'm sure I'll find out another way," she said. Isabela groaned.

"Fine!...Yes, it was about Hawke..." Isabela relented.

"You really like her don't you?" Tallis observed. Isabela chuckled.

"Oh come on, Sweet Thing. Do you really think someone like me would fall for a woman like Hawke?"

Tallis wasn't fooled however. "I used to be like you, you know. I told myself if I never cared about anyone or anything, I could never be hurt. Life would be fun".

"Don't try to empathise with me, elf," Isabela replied, hating when people tried to put themselves in her place. _Like anyone has done half the shit I have._ "You don't know me."

"I know your type," Tallis countered, "A nomad, always keeping others at a distance. You think your life will be better off alone, that life will be great with only yourself to worry about. I thought the same thing, Isabela. But it wasn't. There was a hole inside me and nothing I did ever filled it."

Isabela chuckled. "Oh, that one's too easy," she said, noticing the potential sexual innuendo. She had a talent for picking them out, even if they weren't dangling in front of her like this. _Maker, I miss the old days of flirting with Hawke, both of us getting drunk in The Hanged Man with Varric and winding Aveline up...Back when everything was less complicated._

"Not everything should be easy," Tallis continued, misreading her response. "Don't you wonder what it would be like? A life with meaning, with purpose?"

Isabela looked at her. _Andraste's Ass she sounds like one of the damn Qunari! _"I... have a purpose," the pirate replied, "Or rather...I _had _a purpose."

"Hawke?" Tallis asked, even though she already had a feeling she was correct. Isabela turned away and got to her feet then.

"The girly chat's over," she replied, taking a look around their surroundings. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. Let's go get this damned jewel and get out of this pompous Orlesian pit."

"Fine. But we need to find Hawke first," Tallis said, getting to her feet. "I need her help." Isabela sighed in disagreement. _Great_

"Fine," she said bitterly, "Lead on then. The sooner I get out of this place the better."

* * *

Lana leaned over the edge of the fountain, staring into its depths. The party had long since moved indoors, with only Leliana remaining behind. Lana had brushed off Varric and Aveline, ordering them to leave her be and take Merrill inside to have a good time. The little elf had rarely ventured outside her house in the last three years, seeing as Isabela hadn't been around and Hawke herself hadn't the time since she started working for Meredith.

Lana pulled a silver caprice she had collected from her pocket and threw it into the fountain, wishing silently that she could turn back time to the good old days, when all she had to worry about was which drink to order and what woman to bed. _Mother used to love those coins. _She sighed, trying to come to terms with what she had just done. _I abandoned my little sister. _She had no idea if she had made the right choice. All Lana knew was that she couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't keep trying to win back her sisters love and getting nothing in return. It was killing her inside. A gentle hand placed itself on her back then.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Leliana asked gently, rubbing her back. Lana couldn't reply, for fear of what would happen if she opened her mouth. Instead she continued staring into the water, trying to compose herself. This was too much to deal with right now on top of everything else. Leliana could feel Hawke's heavy breaths, as she tried to hold herself together. Suddenly a small sob escaped her.

"Hey," Leliana soothed, her heart breaking at the sound. Lana had always been so strong. "Come here...Shh..."

Lana allowed herself to be turned around and felt Leliana's arms wrap around her. She buried her face in the woman's chest feeling the tears escape against her will. Her entire body heaved as she wept, in too much pain to feel embarrassed. Leliana kissed the top of her head and tried to hold her together. She never thought she would see the day when Bethany and Lana were not friends. Their relationship had been beautiful to watch during the two years she had spent in Lothering. She had often wondered what it would be like to have a sister like that. The hardships forced on them by the Blight had clearly torn them apart though, almost literally. It just showed how deep their relationship had been if someone as strong as Lana could be reduced to tears over its demise.

After several minutes, Leliana pulled back slightly and tilted Lana's face up to hers. The woman's face was soaked with tears and her lips were trembling. She was beside herself with despair. Unable to stop herself, Leliana leaned in slowly, and gently placed her lips on hers.

Lana closed her eyes, tasting the sweetness of Leliana's tongue cajoling against her own. She felt the warm hand caressing her cheek and wanted nothing more than to stay in that moment forever. It was almost impossible to believe that something so amazing could still exist in this world. The kiss was just as intoxicating as it had been that first time in Lothering all those years ago. For those brief few seconds, all of Hawke's troubles had vanished. Her heart felt lighter, the weight having been lifted momentarily.

They pulled apart then. Lana rested her head against Leliana's, felling the woman's warm breath on her face. Leliana held her close, wishing she could do something to take away her pain. In another life they would have been prefect together. But both of their hearts belonged to another, and as hard as that was to bear, it couldn't be undone. They stood in each other's embrace, eyes closed, swaying slightly to the faint sound of classical music which was echoing from inside the Chateau. It was another few minutes before either of them spoke, content enough to just be close to each other.

"Do you love Isabela?" Leliana whispered finally. It was clear to her now after the pirate's recent outburst that she was the woman Lana had spoken of before.

Silence followed her question.

"Lana?" Leliana said, opening her eyes and pulling her head back slightly. She brushed a lock of Hawke's hair away from her face and stared into the deep, swimming, chocolate-brown eyes. "Do you?" she asked again.

"Yes..." Lana whispered back, finally admitting to herself that she still did. She averted her eyes, feeling foolish for revealing it, especially after Isabela's latest stunt. Leliana tucked her fingers under Lana's chin and titled her face up to look at her again. She gazed once more into those brown eyes and smiled.

"Then don't let her get away again," she whispered back.

Lana lost herself in Sister Leliana's blue eyes, knowing the woman was speaking from her own experience. The Grey Warden had disappeared on her. However, Lana knew that even though Leliana was convinced the Hero of Ferelden still loved her, she missed her more than anything. But it didn't have to be this way for Hawke and Isabela. This was what Leliana was trying to make her see. There was still a chance for them to make things right, however difficult that might be. It was either that, or let the almost-relationship die before it could ever truly come alive.

As if on cue, the door to the Chateau opened, behind them. The classical music, louder now, drifted out into the massive courtyard, breaking up the tender moment between the two women. They pulled apart and looked up to see Tallis and Isabela walking towards them. The pirate tried to hide her suspicion at the private moment she and Tallis had evidently just spoiled. Lana hid her face, trying to wipe away her tears before the others noticed, but it didn't escape Isabela. _I suppose the situation with Bethany didn't go well then. Maker, Little Hawke is getting as bad as me when it comes to making Lana's life a misery._

"Tallis?" Leliana exclaimed in surprise.

"Leliana!" Tallis replied in a weird tone. "It's...so lovely to see you again."

Isabela groaned.

"Oh please don't tell me you've slept with her as well," she blurted out before she could stop herself. Leliana's face flushed a beetroot-red colour.

"Um...No," Tallis replied, turning up her nose.

"I get the distinct impression you two have...met before though," Hawke said, having regained her composure. She grinned at Leliana, who chuckled nervously.

"Oh briefly," Tallis replied "A long time ago."

"Haven't we all?" Isabela joked, taking a quick glance at Lana for her reaction. To her surprise Hawke was looking at her as well. She was still grinning slightly. _Is...she really smiling at me?_ As soon as the thought entered the Rivaini's head, Lana turned away and her face fell again. _Bugger, Maybe not...Wishful thinking, Isabela._

"You meet all sorts of people in Orlais," Leliana said, breaking the awkward silence, "It keeps life exciting."

"I'll bet," Isabela chimed in again, wearing her usual smirk. Hawke cleared her throat, staring off into the distance.

"Well, I'm...glad we had this chance to chat," Tallis replied uncomfortably.

"Yes," Leliana replied, just as uncomfortable, "It...was...nice."

"Indeed," Tallis said, "But, I'm afraid I have to steal Hawke for a bit. We have some...catching up to do. I'm afraid we have to leave."

Lana saw the pointed look the elf was giving her and knew it had something to do with this so-called Heart of The Many which they were planning on stealing. _So this is the part where I 'excuse myself' from the party and creep around in places where I shouldn't be. _

"Yes," she replied, nodding to show she understood. "We'll go get the others."

She turned to Leliana, who looked sad that she had to leave. Lana smiled at her and they hugged again, tighter than ever as though neither wanted to let go. Isabela bit her tongue and looked away, not realising Tallis was watching her for her reaction. _Oh balls, it's only a hug. What in The Maker's name is wrong with me?...Uuf, don't open that door..._

"Take care, Lana," Leliana said in her ear, "I'll miss you."

"You too," Hawke replied, kissing her on the cheek, "I hope you find her again."

"Thank you," she whispered, "And remember what I said."

"I will," Hawke whispered back.

They finally pulled apart (before Isabela threw another fit of jealousy) and Hawke reluctantly began to walk away, followed by her companions. After a few steps she turned back.

"Will I ever see you again?" she asked hopefully. Leliana gave her a huge smile.

"Who knows?" she asked, staring into her eyes, "If The Maker wills it...then I'll be there waiting for you."

Hawke smiled back, "Goodbye Leliana. It's been a pleasure."

With that, she turned away and headed back towards the Chateau, praying to The Maker for the first time in her life that it wouldn't be the last time she would see Sister Leliana.


	28. Chapter 28

Hawke walked towards the entrance of the magnificent Chateau Haine, ready to rejoin the party then formally 'take her leave' to begin what she had come here to do. She was eager to get this heist over and done with and get back home. Kirkwall had never looked so welcoming after this trip and Lana was tired of the noble act she had been putting on all day. The whole highborn crap really wasn't in her nature, and she hated the way these people looked at her, especially after the whole humiliating party-stopping argument which happened little over an hour ago. _That little piece of drama will be talked about at gatherings for years to come I'm sure. The Champion of Kirkwall has a domestic spat worthy of an Orlesian housewife. _

As soon as Lana, Tallis and Isabela reached the foyer, the pirate grabbed Hawke by the arm and pulled her to the side. Hawke looked at her in surprise. Tallis hovered in the doorway to the ballroom, realising the other two had stopped behind her.

"You go on, Tallis," Isabela said, glancing over her shoulder, "Hawke and I need to talk...alone."

The elf hesitated and stared at Lana. She did not look happy at having Isabela touch her. Tallis waited to see if she wanted this or not. She didn't look like she was in the mood for any more arguing today. After several seconds Hawke nodded stiffly, providing Tallis with the chance to take her leave, abandoning the two women in the large, empty foyer. As soon as she was gone, Hawke pulled out of Isabela's grip and glared at her.

"Look, Hawke..." the Rivaini began, getting ready to do battle again,"I'm s-"

"I don't want another sorry, Bela," Lana interrupted, knowing what she was going to say and knowing the pirate didn't want to say it anymore than she wanted to hear it. Isabela looked confused.

"After what I just did?" she asked, raising an eyebrow sceptically. "I thought you would have had me down on all fours...and not in a good way." Hawke gave a long, hard sigh and lowered herself down onto a nearby step belonging to a large marble staircase, which led to one of the overlooking balconies above. She stared into nothingness, shaking her head. It had been such a long day. After a slight pause, Isabela sat down beside her, leaving a little space in between them.

"She was bound to find out eventually," Lana said finally, breaking the silence. Her voice had returned to its normal level, having no energy left to shout anymore. "It was stupid of me to hide it from her for so long, to hide it from everyone...But at the time it was just easier I guess."

"Even so," Isabela pressed, talking normally as well, "You didn't deserve that, Hawke. I didn't mean to make a fool out of you...well, more of a fool out of you since I clearly have a talent for it now."

Hawke snorted silently and ran a hand through her hair. She looked up and scanned the extravagantly decorated foyer in one sweeping glance. _Isabela certainly does have a talent for hurting me. But she's not the only one..._Hearing her small sigh of laughter, Isabela smiled a little herself. It had been a while since Hawke had given her anything other than dirty looks and well-aimed insults. She would take what she could get right now.

"Maybe I _am_ a fool, Bela," Hawke said suddenly. She turned to look at the pirate, a sad expression on her face. Isabela stared back, wondering how Hawke could even conjure up the strength to deal with everything the world had thrown at her over the years. _Not to mention what I alone have slung at her. For most people that would be more than enough shit for one person to handle._ But as the Rivaini stared into the woman's eyes she could see that her strength was waning under the pressure of it all. She had seen it happen gradually over the years she had known her. But now? Now Hawke was at her limit. This bullshit had to come to an end eventually, otherwise there would be nothing left of her to salvage.

"I don't believe that for a second, Hawke," Isabela answered, giving her an encouraging smile. Lana snorted silently once more and her head dropped. It was several seconds before she spoke again.

"Look, Isabela..." She lifted her head and turned to face the pirate again, "Right now I have just turned my back on the one person I loved most in the world, for the simple fact that she could never love me back...not in the way she used to anyway." Isabela swallowed over the lump in her throat. _So it wasn't Bethany who had turned her sister away at all. It was the opposite. _Hawke exhaled shakily before continuing. "I'm just so tired of fighting...I can't do it anymore."

"Then let's not fight," Isabela replied, wanting nothing more. She leaned over closer, trying to make her listen. "Hawke, I don't really expect you to forgive me for what I've done...for any of it. I mean, I wouldn't if I was in your shoes. But don't you remember what it was like a few years ago? Back before all this Qunari business?... We were so good together...us _and_ Varric. The Hanged Man didn't know what had hit it when the three of us started drinking there."

Hawke managed a real laugh this time, with Isabela chuckling herself. The pirate was glad to see that her words could still put a smile on Lana's face. It had been so long since she had seen it there. The woman almost looked like her old self already.

"I do remember," Lana said, nodding as she recalled some of the finer memories of stress-free times with her friends.

"Don't you miss it?" Isabela asked, staring off into the distance with a smile on her face as she remembered her own experiences back then.

Lana nodded, turning back to face the Rivaini. "I do," she admitted truthfully, "I really do, Bela...But now it's..."

The smile slid of the pirate's face. "I know," she agreed, nodding miserably. The two of them sat in silence for a minute, still a little lost in the fond memories of their time spent together in the good old days. Then Hawke sighed.

"I need some time, Isabela," she said simply, staring into the pirate's amber eyes. "I'm not ready to forgive you yet. Maybe someday I will but...Everything's just been so messed up lately...I need time to get my head around it all."

"I get it Hawke," the Rivaini replied, feeling the deepest regret once again at what she had done over the years. "I just...wish there was some way we could go back to how we were. But I understand if you never want to see me again."

"I've already cut one person out of my life today," Lana continued, painfully, "And it hurt me more than I could have ever imagined... I'm torn to pieces inside, Bela." The pirate wasn't at all surprised to hear that, but it still shocked her all the same. Hawke dropped her gaze and began fidgeting, ashamed to have said the words out loud. The pirate knew that Lana never liked to admit being weak in any way. _Just like me. _She could see her still struggling to hold it together, trying desperately not to let it show. After a moment of contemplation she finally looked back up at Isabela. "So... for that reason, I'm not about to do it again so soon."

Isabela's eyes widened. "...What does this mean?" she asked, surprised.

"Well, it means that right now I'm angrier at Bethany than I am with you. So...In order for me not to go entirely insane...I...I think we should try being civil to each other at the very least."

The pirate was stunned. "Really?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

"Unless you don't think you're capable," Hawke replied, giving her a stern look.

Isabela was taken aback, "No, I...I think I could manage that," she said, in awe at the mercy she was being granted.

"Good," Lana replied, almost in relief. "So if I was to call you a selfish pirate whore to your face, don't take it personally ok?"

It took Isabela a second to notice the unexpected joke. Seeing a small, mischievous smirk playing on the corner of Hawke's lips, she burst out laughing then.

"And if I was to call you a cheeky bastard?" she replied, smirking back.

"Well, it works both ways," Lana replied wickedly, her smirk getting wider.

Both women shared a moment of laughter together, almost a reflection of their old selves. Isabela took a deep breath, relaxing into Lana's company one more. She wondered where Hawke's good nature had reappeared from all of a sudden. Maybe it was just to do with everything that had happened with Bethany. Or maybe there was something more to it. Isabela had a feeling Leliana was the main reason for this sudden change of heart. _If that's true, remind me to buy the woman a pint if I ever see her again. She's just dug me out of the deepest pit I've ever been in...Or at the very least threw me a little rigging to get myself out._

"Come on then," the pirate said, getting to her feet and pulling an exhausted Hawke to hers. "We have a jewel to steal."

Lana smiled and held out her arm, gesturing towards the door which led to the party.

"After you then," she said, waiting expectantly. As Isabela pushed open the door to the ballroom, Lana added under her breath, "You thieving little wench..."

"Oy!" The pirate scolded, turning her head and giving her a look. "Watch it...and isn't the saying 'ladies first'?

Hawke snorted, "Oh please, Isabela. We both know you're no lady."

"You would know."

Lana smiled, followed the chuckling pirate in through the door, both of them wondering how long this new-found peace between them would last. Because knowing Hawke and knowing Isabela, they were bound to blow up in each others faces again somewhere down the line. That was inevitable. There were still a lot of things left to be said between both women, but today wasn't that day. It wasn't clear when it would happen, but it was clear to both of them now that their relationship was always going to be explosive, one way or another.

* * *

"Ok, ready?" Tallis asked, eagerly.

Hawke glanced after Isabela who had walked on to find Varric. The pirate turned back and gave her a wink just before she disappeared into the crowd. Lana threw her a small smile in return. She turned back to Tallis then.

"Ready," she replied, nodding, "Where are the others?"

"I thought it would look too suspicious if all of us left at once," Tallis informed her quietly, "Aveline and the dwarf are going to be our look outs. The elven girl is little tipsy though."

Hawke began to snigger. _Varric's fault no doubt. _ Merrill never could handle her drink. At least Aveline was there to keep her right though.

"Don't worry, she'll be fine," she informed a worried Tallis.

"If you say so," Tallis replied, looking amused. "Anyway, if any word of our presence gets back to the Duke, they'll know about it too and be able to help us out in case we're caught."

"Do you think that's likely?" Hawke asked, feeling less confident.

Tallis shrugged, "Not really, but better safe than sorry."

Hawke nodded, agreeing with her logic.

"Ok, well, let's get go-"

"Wait a second, Hawke," Tallis interrupted, before she could begin to leave.

"What is it?" she asked, wondering what could have possibly gone wrong now. The elf hesitated.

"It's just that...well, your sister is still here as well and I thought-"

"No," Lana interrupted, realizing where she was going with this. "I don't want her involved in any way."

"But more sets of eyes with be use-"

"No!" Hawke said firmly, shaking her head. She couldn't even face looking at Bethany right now, let alone inviting her into their plan. Of course Tallis didn't have any idea though. She hadn't seen the argument. _Unless she's spoken to Aveline or Varric...Actually pretty much anyone at the party could have told her. _The look on her face said she knew more than she was letting on. Hawke's jaw tightened. "Just stay out of what you don't understand, Tallis. Leave her out of this, please."

Tallis was taken aback at Lana's firm reluctance.

"I...um...ok, if that's what you want."

"It is," Hawke answered seriously, "Now let's get out of here."

Without further ado, the two women left the party and re-entered the courtyard. As they passed the fountain, which was sparkling beautifully in the night, Hawke couldn't help but glance around hopefully in search for one last glance of Sister Leliana. But the woman was gone. Ignoring the sinking feeling in her heart, Lana followed Tallis in through one of the side doors which she opened with a small, bronze key. They closed it quietly behind them, sending the hall into semi-darkness.

"I take it this is the restricted area?" Hawke whispered, trying to adjust her eyes. Tallis grinned at her and pocketed the key.

"Don't tell me you've never entered somewhere you shouldn't have," she teased, giving her knowing look. "You know, somewhere 'forbidden'?" Hawke laughed quietly, rolling her eyes.

"All right, what have you heard?" she asked, smiling.

"I was simply talking about trespassing," Tallis answered, playing coy.

Hawke snorted, "Of course you were."

"And...maybe subtly referring to that Chantry Sister in the courtyard," Tallis added lightly, turning to Lana for her reaction.

"Oh please," Lana replied, trying not to laugh as they stalked down the dark corridor, "You're about as subtle as a Qunari in heavy armor."

Tallis giggled, "So it's true then?" she asked, interestedly.

"Depends on who you ask," Lana replied, smirking. Tallis sniggered again.

"Do you ever give a straight answer?" she mused.

"Do you ever ask a direct question?" Hawke countered, grinning cheekily at her as they rounded a corner and headed up the stairs towards a door at the far end. Tallis rolled her eyes.

"Fine," she relented, "Did you and the Chantry Sister ever have something going?"

"Hmm," Lana said pretending to ponder the question, "Define 'something going'?"

The elf groaned, "Ugh, you're not going to make this easy on me are you?"

"Make what easy?" Hawke answered, enjoying toying with her. Tallis sighed.

"Just answer the damn question, Hawke. Did you sleep with her or not?"

Hawke laughed. "Why so interested, Tallis?"

As they pass a lantern on the wall, Lana saw her face turn red. _Aww, she's blushing._

"I...um...I'm not. Just wondering, that's all," the elf replied not looking at her. Lana sniggered again, saying nothing. Tallis glared at her then. "Fine!" she continued, realising she wasn't going to get an answer. "Play your little games."

"What games?" Hawke asked, grinning at her. She could see the frustration on Tallis' face.

"Oh, shut up," she replied, embarrassed. Hawke chuckled to herself and opened the door at the end of the hall, feeling the night air assault her face as the two of them made their way out onto one of the outside balconies. A sleeping guardsman greeted them at the bottom of the steps.

"Your work I take it?" Hawke asked, impressed. Tallis nodded.

"He's not dead, just knocked out. I put something in his drink."

Hawke snorted. "Would have been easier to kill him, don't you think?"

Tallis gave her a disapproving look. "Just because someone's in your way doesn't mean you have to kill them, Hawke. Everyone has their purpose in life. Who am I to decide when they should die?"

Lana gave her a weird look. "Says the elf who introduced herself by dropping out of thin air and killing a dozen guards in the space of a minute."

"Stopping them from killing you," Tallis added, as though that justified her actions.

Hawke shrugged. "What if that was their purpose?" she joked. The elf glared at her.

"Are you always this infuriating?" she asked, irritated. Lana laughed.

"I try to be," she replied, smirking cheekily. She heard Tallis sigh and followed her across the dark balcony which was littered with more sleeping guards. The elf unlocked the door on the other side and they closed it carefully behind them, blocking out the night chill once more. As they made their way through another dark corridor, lit only by a few lanterns on the walls, Tallis rounded on her again.

"What about the pirate?" she asked, glancing at Lana. She saw the woman's playful expression turn a little sombre.

"What about her?" Hawke replied, drier than she had been before. Tallis smiled to herself. This is what she had really wanted to ask. She had a feeling Hawke knew it too.

"You and she seem to be...close," Tallis continued, almost asking the question she wanted. She turned to Lana, waiting. Hawke avoided her gaze.

"We're friends," she said simply.

"Didn't look that way to me," Tallis said lightly, gently pressing her to say more. Hawke glanced at her, seeing the intrigued look on her face.

"Why, what did you see?" she asked, reluctant to speak on the subject. Tallis hesitated. Clearly she hadn't been expecting the question.

"Um, I don't know." She paused. "It just seemed like you two shared some sort of...history."

"How intuitive, Tallis," Hawke teased, in mock praise, "A round of applause for the smartest thief in all of Thedas!"

"Oh, you're _so _annoying," Tallis groaned, "It's like talking to an infant."

When Hawke just laughed, the elf tried a different tact.

"I heard about your big scene back at the party, you know," she said, staring at Hawke again. Hawke gasped.

"I know!" she exclaimed excitedly, turning to Tallis, "A free bottle of wine for catching the biggest Wyvern! Can you believe it? I'm all of a dither!"

"Andraste's Ass!" Tallis exclaimed, her patience wearing thin. "Is it possible for us to have a conversation without jokes and sarcasm?"

"Oh, Tallis," Lana said in a serious manner, holding her hand over her heart, "You wound me with that tone! I thought we were getting along so well."

"Oh, forget it!" Tallis groaned, rolling her eyes and shoving open another door a little too forcefully. Lana continued laughing to herself. The look of annoyance on Tallis' face could have given Aveline a run for her coin. _Ah, how I love that look. How warm and fuzzy it makes me feel inside._ After several minutes of sneaking through more corridors, Hawke realised she had no idea where they were going.

"I take it you know where this vault is?" she asked, hoping Tallis hadn't got lost. "We've been walking for almost half an hour now."

"Oh, of course," Tallis replied, "I just thought we should spend some time getting to know each other better, so I took the long way around."

Hawke chuckled at the obvious sarcasm.

"Infuriating isn't it, not getting a straight answer?" Tallis asked, smirking at her.

"I rather enjoyed it actually," Hawke teased. She heard the elf exhale loudly beside her and knew she had wound her up again.

After a few more long corridors (and a few more sleeping guards) they finally came to a strange-looking room.

"All right, this is it," Tallis said, catching her breath. As soon as the words left her mouth, a large gate dropped behind them, sealing them inside.

"It's never as easy as it looks, is it?" Hawke complained, grabbing one of the metal bars and tugging. It was shut tight.

"Opps," Tallis said, apologetically, "I swear that didn't happen last time."

Hawke groaned and took a look around, spotting the large metal gates all around them, blocking their way. Behind the one in front there was a giant door, which Hawke assumed led to the vault and to their treasure.

"Any ideas?" she asked, looking at the impenetrable passageways. "Unless you brought me here because you thought I could walk through steel."

"Couldn't hurt to give it a shot," Tallis joked, smirking. "Any way, I know how we open the vault. But it's a little tricky. See those slabs of concrete?" Hawke looked at where she was pointing, seeing parts of the floor raised higher than the others. She nodded. "Well, they act as some sort of mechanism for the gates to open, but there's some sort of pattern."

"Fancy," Hawke approved, "Very Orlesian."

Tallis rolled her eyes. "Come on," she said, wondering how Hawke could still be relaxed enough to make jokes, "Shouldn't be too difficult."

Reaching out with her foot, the tiny elf kicked over one of the statues nearby, causing it to land on one of the concrete buttons. The head of the statue broke off and rolled across the floor loudly crashing against the nearest gate. The gate suddenly raised itself, clearing the way to another passage and another button.

"Subtle," Hawke joked, folding her arms and nodding approvingly.

"As subtle as a Qunari in heavy armor," the elf replied, smirking, repeating Hawke's earlier words. "We'll figure this out as we go. Let's get to work."

* * *

"You!"

Isabela jumped slightly and turned around to find an angry, red face in front of hers. She grinned, trying not to laugh.

"And you," she replied, jokingly.

"Don't you bloody dare!" Aveline scolded, holding up a warning finger. She was in no mood for jokes after what she had just witnessed. "You've got some explaining to do!"

"Actually I've got some drinking to do," Isabela corrected, toasting her with her goblet of wine. "So if you'll excuse me-"

"I don't think so!" Aveline growled under her breath, trying not to cause another scene. She grabbed the pirate by the scruff as she tried to walk round her, causing her to spill some of her wine.

"Oh, what a waste!" Isabela lamented, watching the red liquid splash on the marble floor. As soon as it hit, an elven servant appeared out of no where and soaked it up before anyone could see. Aveline still had a firm grip on Isabela's, making sure she couldn't escape.

"What in The Maker's name did I tell you before you came here!?" she hissed angrily. Isabela stared back at her, unfazed.

"To have a good time?" she joked, trying to take a sip from her glass. Aveline snatched the goblet from the pirate's grasp and slammed it down on the nearby table. She glared at Isabela, their faces inches apart.

"I told you, Slattern. I _warned_ you not to make a scene when you came here, and what did you do?" she asked, her grip tightening on the Rivaini's arm. Isabela sighed, feeling a little ashamed of herself. _Who'd have thought the Big Girl would make me feel like this? Normally I couldn't give a damn what she thinks._ Aveline was beside herself with anger.

"Look, I know alright?" Isabela muttered, avoiding eye contact.

"I gave you a chance," Aveline continued furiously, "More than you deserved and you wasted it. All because that bitch Elegant was here. Can you not keep it in your pants for one night?"

"I made a mistake," Isabela replied, successfully retrieving her arm from Aveline's vice-like grip.

"Story of your life," the guardswoman spat, "I just hope for your sake that you can live with it."

"Hey!" the pirate exclaimed hauling Aveline back as she went to walk away, "Do you think this is what I wanted?" she hissed in her ear.

"I thought you wanted to be with Hawke!" Aveline said back, a little too loudly as her anger got the better of her. Suddenly the two of them noticed Bethany alone by the food table. She was staring at them as though she had been listening to their conversation. Aveline pulled away from Isabela and scowled at the pirate before walking over to where Merrill was standing, swaying unsteadily to the music. The pirate turned back to Bethany and took a deep breath. She grabbed her goblet of wine from the table and made her way over to the youngest Hawke.

"It's been a long time, Sweet Thing," she said, giving her a smile. Bethany tried to smile back but couldn't manage it.

"I fear it will be even longer now," she replied sadly, staring at the ground. "Considering what I've heard about you and my sister...if I can even call her that anymore. She doesn't want to see me ever again."

"Look, Bethany," Isabela began, leaning on the table beside her, "Hawke had her reasons for not saying anything in the beginning. Try to see it from her point of view. She didn't want to lose you...And us? Well, that happened long after you joined the Circle. And there was really nothing much to tell."

"That's why I'm mad!" Bethany replied, looking at Isabela, "Why did she think that I would hate her for something like that? She's my sister, Bela. Doesn't she know me at all?"

The pirate sighed. "Things have been tough for her since you were taken, Bethany," she informed her, "With your mother in particular."

Bethany shook her head, "I know they didn't get along," she said, sadly, "Ever since Carver...But that's still no excuse for letting her die."

Isabela choked on her wine. "Is that what you think happened?" she asked, in disbelief, wiping her mouth. She could hear the bitterness and blame in Bethany's tone. _Balls, she can't be serious! _

"Isn't it?" Bethany asked, getting angry, "She didn't even write to tell me when Mother died, Bela! I had to hear the news from Uncle Gamlen. _Gamlen!_ Of all people!"

Isabela shook her head, "You weren't there Bethany. You didn't see what happened."

"I know exactly what happened to her, Bela," Bethany said, "Murdered by a necromancer. Gamlen's letter wasn't exactly thorough but I was able to decipher enough from what he meant."

The pirate sighed. "I wasn't talking about Leandra..."

"What?" Bethany asked, confused now.

"I was talking about your sister," Isabela said seriously. Bethany looked surprised.

"What about her?"

Isabela took a sip of her wine, trying to find the words to describe the state Hawke had been in that day. She cringed, remembering the woman's face. It wasn't sad. It wasn't full of pain. It was just...blank, as though she was dead inside. "Hawke was..." The pirate sighed, shaking her head, "I can't explain it, Bethany. Please don't ask me to. The woman was tormented like I've never seen. She was beating herself up, taking the blame for you, your brother, Leandra...and Maker knows what else."

"For _me_?" Bethany asked timidly. The Rivaini nodded.

"You might think that you made the decision to work for Anders, Sweetness," Isabela said, grimacing, "But your sister has been kicking herself since the day the Templars took you, believing that she was the one responsible."

"B-But why?" Bethany stammered, shocked, "I mean, I-I was the one...It was me who-"

"Exactly!" The pirate interrupted. "And it was your _mother_ who made the decision which inevitably led to her own death. Can you see where I'm going with this?"

Bethany stared at her in shock. She could see what Isabela was implying. The truth began to dawn on the youngest Hawke at last. Lana hadn't let their mother die at all. Just like she hadn't let Bethany get taken by the Templars. Bethany alone had gotten herself into that situation, and so had their mother. Even Carver had made the split-second decision himself to charge down that ogre which ultimately led to his death. And all these years Lana had taken the blame for all of them. Bethany placed a hand over her open mouth as the realization finally hit her.

"Maker's Breath!" she exclaimed, eyes wide.

"You're welcome," Isabela said to her, seeing she had got there at last. She let Bethany sit for a minute, as the revelation sunk in. The pirate took a satisfied sip of her wine. _I deserve a medal for that, _she thought to herself, _Was that the first selfless good deed I have ever done?_ _Look at me interfering in other peoples lives. And everyone says I haven't changed. _As the pirate joked to herself, she heard a stunned Bethany groan beside her then, finally regaining her voice.

"Oh, Bela, I've been a complete and utter fool all these years!" she cried. The pirate gave her a look and a nod of the head.

"I hear you," she replied, knowing she wasn't in any position to judge.

"What am I going to do?" Bethany asked, her heart sinking in regret. "She's never going to speak to me again, Bela. Oh, damn it! I'm such an _idiot!_"

"Can't help you there, Sweet Thing," the pirate replied, "I'm not exactly in Hawke's good books either."

"B-But I thought you and she were...were..."

Isabela laughed at the embarrassment on Bethany's face. It reminded her of the teenage girl she had first met all those years ago. The cute, innocent little virgin who occasionally inquired about her sexual partners and was appalled at the filth which Isabela would reply with. _Maybe I should send her more reading material to the Circle. It must get pretty lonely there._

"We're not, Sweetness," she said sadly, "I've been a bit of a fool as well."

"Oh," Bethany replied, "So you never...It-It was with just Leliana then?"

Isabela chuckled again. "How did you know I slept with-Oh, you mean Hawke?" she said, interrupting herself. "Eh, no I don't think there was anything with her either."

"Then what was all that about in the courtyard?" Bethany asked confused. "Just...sex?"

"Uhm..." The pirate's train of thought was interrupted suddenly as two armed guards burst through the ballroom doors. _Shit, _Isabela thought as she watched them approach Duke Prosper talking animatedly to one of his guests._ This can't be good._ "Hold that thought, Bethany," she said, caressing a finger along her cheek before straightening up off the table and placing her empty goblet down. "I'll be back soon."

The Rivaini squeezed through the party guests who were chatting wildly with flailing hands and pompous manners and then cut across the dance floor towards the Duke's table. She got as close as possible, without raising too much alarm and strained her ears to listen in to his ongoing conversation with his guards.

"...near the vault, Serah. The statues are broken..."

"...Guards were poisoned..."

"...Women's voices..."

The Duke's face grew menacing. "I knew it," he hissed, getting to his feet. "That assassin is mine."

"Assassin?" Isabela whispered to herself, frowning.

"Get my bodyguard and rouse the others," the Duke ordered, getting to his feet.

"Oh balls!" Isabela groaned, watching the men exit the ballroom. The Duke say a courteous goodbye to his guests before following after his guards out of the hall. The pirate rushed through the crowd towards Varric at the wine cask.

"We have a problem," she said, "Hawke's walking into a trap. I'll fill you in on the way. Let's go."

"Ah, damn it!" the dwarf complained, "I was just about to have another drink."

"Down it!" Isabela called over her shoulder as she rushed after the Duke and his men.

Varric obeyed, draining the glass of wine in one as he raced after the Rivaini, hoping that they would make it on time. He had a feeling something wasn't right with that Tallis. His instincts were usually correct. The Dwarf followed after Isabela towards the commotion, hoping Hawke could handle a few guards herself until they got there. Something about this whole heist stank. Bianca was beginning to tingle.


	29. Chapter 29

"Hurry up! I think we've lost them!"

Isabela was sprinting desperately through the winding corridors of Chateau Haine, a slightly tipsy Varric in tow. There was sweat dripping from her brow and she was breathing heavily after being chased by no fewer than twenty, heavily armed guards. They had just attracted some unwanted attention from Duke Prosper's men as they tried to tail him to Hawke and Tallis' destination, where the two women were unknowingly about to stumble into an ambush. The pirate knew fine rightly Hawke could handle herself (and then some), but even the best can sometimes get overwhelmed by sheer numbers, and the number of guards who took off with the Duke left an uncomfortable feeling in the pirate's gut. _If they so much as touch a hair on her head I'll string them up! _

"Shit," Varric wheezed, catching up finally. He leaned over, clutching his side. "I think I'm going to vomit."

"Wine not sitting well?" Isabela teased, slowing to a light jog now, realising they had escaped their pursuers. Varric groaned.

"Uff, why did you tell me to down it?"

The pirate laughed, "You didn't need much encouragement, Varric."

"Fair point," he said chuckling, "It was some good stuff. Daisy's probably on her ass right about now."

"Either that or she's dragged Aveline up for a dance," Isabela replied. The two of them looked at each other for a second then, before bursting into laughter as the mental image of a sour-faced Aveline being led around a dance floor by a drunken, stumbling Merrill entered their minds.

After several minutes, the pirate wiped the tears from her eyes, having laughed so hard she had cried a little.

"Aww, curse Hawke for getting into trouble again," she said, still chuckling with the dwarf, "I'd have paid good coin to see that."

"Likewise," Varric replied, "Daisy really can't handle her drink, can she? A shocking feat considering how much time she spends with you."

Isabela laughed, "Excuse me," she replied, "I think you'll find _you _were the one who got her drunk tonight, not me...But you do have a point. I think we're a bad influence on her."

"Or a good influence," Varric corrected, "She really needs to get out of the house more often."

"Hmm, maybe your right," Isabela said, nodding her head as they made their way through a dark, damp corridor. "We'll have turned Kitten into a tiger before long."

Varric chuckled. "At least we escaped the stench of over seasoned meat," he continued. "Why they do that at fancy parties I'll never know."

Isabela snorted.

"Because if you can't smell how expensive the spices are, what's the point?" she said, her voice heavy with sarcasm. They both sniggered.

"Orlesians," the dwarf said, shaking his head as though he'll never understand them.

Suddenly their nostrils were assaulted by another foul smell. _Maker's breath, it smells worse than a sweaty session at The Hanged Man. _By the stench, the place they had just entered must have been where the slaves resided. There were less fancy Orlesian decorations adorning the walls here, and the sound of snoring elves echoed through the unkempt quarters, just loud enough to block out the sound of Isabela and Varric's footsteps as they crept past the numerous bedrooms and descended the stairs at the other end to the hallway below.

"Poor buggers," Isabela said sadly, a grim look on her face.

"Compassion from a pirate?" Varric teased, "Compassion from _Isabela!? _My, my, what has the world come to?"

"Oy, watch it!" the Rivaini replied, "Or do I need to tell everyone about the time you fell asleep spooning Bianca and whispering your love in her 'ear'."

"Touché," the dwarf replied, "I'll keep my mouth shut...But you never did say why you freed all those slaves years ago while working for Castillon."

"I don't want to talk about it," the pirate replied, her jaw tightening. She avoided that topic as best as she could (no matter how many times Fenris tried to pry it out of her). _There was nothing noble about it. It was just a way for me to ease my conscience after what I had done before. Guess I have Hawke to thank for how long I've lasted. Castillon would have no doubt reached me by now if it wasn't for her._

"Alright, suit yourself," Varric said, realising the pirate wasn't going to elaborate.

"I always do," Isabela replied with a grin and a wink.

They traipsed through the dark corridors, until finally the decoration started to get fancier again.

"We'll have to double back at some point. We lost the Duke and the rest of his men... and I have no idea where this damn vault could be," Varric said, as they set off on a brisk run again, eager to make up for lost time.

"Don't worry, we'll find it," Isabela replied, darting out from the shadows and sneaking down another nearby staircase. _Maker, I didn't realise we had run up so high. Damn guards chased us so far. _Varric followed behind, Bianca still resting in his small, muscled arms. "Don't you think you'll run faster if you're not fingering her at the same time?" The Rivaini joked, nodding to the crossbow with a cheeky smirk. The dwarf chuckled.

"It gets her going," he replied, staring down at his beloved weapon, "Then the bolt goes in and out more smoothly."

"Ahh, that old trick," Isabela replied, with longing in her voice.

The two of them laughed as they descended the rest of the stairs and finally found themselves back on the floor which they had started.

"Ok, right or left?" Isabela asked, catching her breath. She turned from one direction to the other. The hallway was lined with so many similar pictures that it was impossible to tell which direction they had been originally running while in pursuit of the Duke.

"You're asking me?" the dwarf grunted, "I was too busy knocking back my glass of wine to notice the decor."

"Balls," the pirate cursed, exhaling. She glanced down both ends of the corridor again, hands on hips, hoping something would jump out and catch her eye. Normally something worth stealing would have piqued her interest as she passed and embed itself in her brain. _But all of this stuff is a pile of crap, _she thought to herself, _I wouldn't get two bloody sovereigns for the whole lot of it._

"Look's like we'll have to guess," Varric said, "If we end up back at the party then we'll know we took the wrong path."

Isabela shrugged, "Aw well," she relented, "At least we can grab another drink while we're there."

"Not to mention see Aveline get wooed by Daisy," The dwarf added. They both laughed again.

"I guess Hawke will just have to hold on a while longer," Isabela relented.

"She's got Tallis for company," Varric said.

Isabela sighed, "That's what I'm worried about."

"You're telling me," The dwarf replied, "I knew there wasn't something right about her."

Isabela averted her eyes. She knew Varric was referring to the 'assassin' (as the Duke had called her) that Hawke was unknowingly travelling with. Isabela was too obviously, but she didn't believe Tallis would turn on her. The pirate was more worried about the way Tallis acted when she was around Hawke. There was no mistaking that she desired her a little. The thought of them together somewhere, possibly in close proximity in a cell (if the Duke hadn't already killed them) was toying with Isabela's newly found jealous side. That uncomfortable feeling entered her stomach again as she turned left and began to run along what she hoped was the right way. _I'm not losing you now Hawke...Not after everything we've been through. _With that horrible sensation weighing on her mind, Isabela led the way, hoping that they weren't already too late.

* * *

"I have a question."

Hawke continued to pace angrily up and down the damp, cramped cell, cursing to herself. _Maker, am I ever going to stop being such a trusting idiot? How do I get myself into these messes?_ The Duke had stripped them of their clothes and weapons, leaving them both in nothing but their underwear.

"Join the club!" Lana spat at the elf on the ground beside her, unable to believe she had the nerve after what Duke Prosper had just revealed to her about her newest companions' identity. As soon as the two of them had successfully kicked over all the statues and opened the iron gates which surrounded them, they were overcome with guards and the Duke himself. And now Lana found herself in a cell, though not entirely sure why she was there. _The Heart of the Many clearly wasn't a jewel at all so technically I wasn't doing anything wrong. It's not like I'm a stranger to people betraying me though...or being in a cell, coming to think about it. Been in one, been in them all._

"Look, I know I should have told you who I was," Tallis sighed, "but would you have trusted me otherwise?"

"Definitely not!" Lana yelled, spinning back to glare at her, "I've had enough dealings with Qunari, thank you very much. I saw them recruit elves first-hand back in Kirkwall...Don't know why it didn't enter my head sooner that you were one of them. I clearly have a knack for attracting their attention... I already knew you were an assassin though. At least I got something right."

"You did?" Tallis asked in disbelief, "How?"

Hawke laughed, "Have you _seen _my friends?" she asked jokingly, "All of them are crazy and most of them are killers."

Tallis snorted, "Good point."

"And I know a real thief when I see one," she added. "You just don't cut it."

"Oh, _thanks_," Tallis replied grumpily.

When Hawke continued to pace restlessly, she got up, unable to watch any longer, and reached out a hand.

"Look, stop for a second," she said, grabbing Hawke's arm. Lana brushed her off, feeling as though she wanted to smack her. Restraining herself, she walked over to the bars of the cell, leaning on them, her back to the elf.

"I don't know why I didn't expect this," she groaned, cursing her stupidity for the millionth time. "Most people I meet tend to stab me in the back before long. And still I'm blind sighted. I think your time was a record though...Others tend to wait for years..."

Tallis hesitated before walking towards her, "Are you...talking about Isabela?" she asked gently. Lana spun back to her furiously.

"I'm talking about you!" she lied, pushing the pirate's face to the back of her mind and hiding her real thoughts from Tallis. The assassin wasn't fooled, however.

"Isabela regrets what she did, Hawke," she informed her, uncomfortable with the hurt she could see in Hawke's eyes. "But someone like her won't ever forgive themselves for their mistakes...so _you_ have to."

"Don't talk to me about Isabela," Lana spat, her temper flaring, "Don't pretend you know what's going on between us...It's not any of your business."

"Sorry," Tallis said, ashamed, "I guess you're right...But I know if it was me I'd be kicking myself for betraying someone like you...and I am."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lana asked curiously. Tallis' face went bright red.

"Please don't make me say it," she replied embarrassed. "Why do you think I chose you to help me in the first place? It wasn't just because you had an invitation..."

Suddenly Lana's suspicions were confirmed. _She has a crush on me_..._More fool her._

"I'm not as great as you think I am, Tallis. The stories you've heard about me were just figments of Varric's imagination, nothing more."

"I know when people are lying and when they are telling the truth, Hawke," Tallis replied, staring back at her again. "I know where the truth starts and the lies end...whether it be Varric's words...or Isabela's."

Lana's jaw tightened, "Don't force this," she warned, "I'm already on speaking terms with her, Tallis...That's the best I can do right now...and that's pushing it."

"I understand," Tallis replied, "But I was in her position once, Hawke...I empathise with her. Give her another chance."

"Look, I really don't want to talk about this," Lana said angrily, "Especially not with you seeing as you did the same sort of thing and then got me imprisoned. I wouldn't be surprised if we're lined up for the block by sunrise...or used to season the wyvern soup."

"I _am _sorry," Tallis said earnestly, brushing over the sticky subject, "This didn't really go to plan...obviously."

Hawke turned away and sat herself down on a nearby cot, before staring up at Tallis once more.

"What was your plan exactly?" she asked, almost amused that the elf thought she could get away with this without scuppering her true identity. Tallis sighed.

"I can't explain it," Tallis replied.

"Try!"

The assassin sighed. "The one I expected to find was names Salit, part of the Ben-Hassrath...The Heart of the Many in other words. I was told he was here to sell Qunari secrets to the Orlesians, endangering our people. I intended to stop him."

"So you recruited me to help save the Qunari? Oh the irony," Lana said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

"No," Tallis replied firmly, "This battle was...personal."

"Personal? How?"

"Salit was my tutor, the one who recruited me to the Ben-Hassrath. He's the one who saw my potential and convinced me I could make a difference...Not like it matters now though. He's going to sell secrets to the Orlesians. One last act of defiance. I had intended to stop him. He'll hurt so many others in the process."

"You mean he'll hurt other Qunari," Lana corrected, "Tell me why I should care. The last I checked the Qunari weren't exactly unable to defend themselves."

"Not every Qunari is a soldier you know!" Tallis replied angrily. "They are people too. People whose only crime is living and they don't deserve what he's going to do to them. But it's more than my duty to stop Salit...It's my moral obligation."

"How touching," Lana replied sarcastically, "But unless we get out of this cell, the point is mute."

"'We'?" Tallis repeated, surprised. "You mean you're still going to help me?"

"I don't take kindly to being thrown in prison," Lana replied, "So if killing the Duke helps you in your quest then yes, I am still going to help you. He's one person who would be improved by the loss of a head."

"You're right," Tallis agreed, "But that's not the solution for everyone, you know."

"So...the others just lose a foot?...Maybe a big toe?" Lana joked.

Tallis groaned, "Now's not the time for jokes, Hawke."

"On the contrary, now is the perfect time or jokes," Lana replied, smirking, "It saves me from yelling my lungs out at you."

Tallis exhaled with relief and plucked up the courage to sit down on the cot beside her, seeing that Hawke's anger had almost passed.

"You really are amazing Hawke," she said gently, placing a hand on her knee. "You know that? What I would have given to know someone like you sooner."

Hawke snorted, "People like me are normally bad news, Tallis. Don't go thinking I'm some kind of hero or something."

The elf chuckled, "Hero?" she asked. "I think you got the wrong impression of the stories I heard about you. Why do you think I didn't treat you with the respect you deserved from the start?"

"Oh, so you heard _those _stories," Lana said with a chuckle, "Then I shouldn't be surprised that you didn't tell me the truth from the beginning."

Tallis laughed, "You're not exactly what I expected, Hawke."

"I never am," Lana replied with a grin, having heard the phrase so many times before.

"I'll try to stay on the right side of you from now on," Tallis said apologetically, "You still have a reputation among my people for being an Arishok killer, don't forget."

Lana chuckled, "Good choice," she agreed, "I'd hate to have to kill _you_ as well."

Tallis gulped. "You can be a little scary sometimes."

"That was the intention. Don't ever double-cross me like that again...Unless you want to decorate my blade with your blood."

"Qunari killer..."

Lana nudged her hard in the ribs.

"Ouch," she groaned, clutching her side, "Ok, maybe this isn't really prison cell conversation."

"Then what do you want to talk about?" Hawke asked, satisfied that the elf was feeling the pain of her elbow.

"Oh I dunno, lost loves? Pirates? Driving the Qunari out of Kirkwall?"

Hawke nudged her in the ribs again.

"How about we just find a way out of here before I throttle you?" she replied getting to her feet as the elf doubled over once more.

"Good choice," Tallis wheezed. "I think you cracked a rib."

* * *

"Know where we are?" Varric asked, as they ran through a dark tunnel.

"Not a damn clue!" Isabela replied from somewhere beside him, "I give up. We've been through every inch of this place twice and there's no sign of them."

"Or we've been through the same twenty feet of this place about a dozen times. It's hard to tell Rivaini. The guards said they were here though. We can't be too far away."

"We should have gone treasure hunting in Wildervale instead," the pirate moaned.

"You're just upset because you couldn't steal another drink from the party aren't you?" the dwarf teased.

"Hardly," Isabela said with a wicked grin, "When hid from the guards in that scullery back there I grabbed a bottle of wine before leaving."

"You scoundrel!" Varric exclaimed with glee as Isabela whipped out a dusty bottle of Orlesian red with a triumphant laugh. "Crack it open."

"At least we won't be extremely bored now," she chuckled, uncorking the bottle with the point of her dagger and taking a generous couple of swigs.

Varric chuckled, "Pass it over, Rivaini. I'm parched."

Isabela handed him the half empty bottle and grabbed a lantern of one of the nearby walls, holding it out and trying to judge their location.

"If these aren't the dungeons then I'm a virgin princess," she joked, seeing the familiar cold, hard, unforgiving stone which lined so many of her cells in recent years.

"Our little Hawke's going up Rivaini. Spending her days in Orlesian prisons, where does the time go?"

"I know," Isabela exclaimed, "Burglary and espionage! We should have hired a painter to get her portrait so we can remember this day forever."

"Next thing she'll be cutting purses and conning guards without us," the dwarf chuckled.

"Actually I think she already does," Isabela replied, sniggering, "But no one can lie like you Varric."

"And no one can steal like you Rivaini."

With a few more chuckles, the two of them continued on down into the dungeons, finishing the bottle of wine between them.

* * *

"I thought you said your friends were coming," Tallis moaned, still holding her side. There was a small bruise forming where Hawke's elbow had connected with her the second time.

"You were the one who wanted to leave lookouts," Lana replied, "What's the point in them if they haven't realised we're captured."

"Good point," Tallis said, "But the last time we seen them, the majority were already drunk and the other half were on their way there."

"Hey!" Hawke scolded, pointing a finger at Tallis in warning, "My friends are more effective when they're drunk."

Tallis groaned, "Do you ever stop making jokes?"

"Do you ever laugh at my jokes?"

"They're not that funny," the elf replied, irritated.

"Then how do you know they're jokes?" Hawke countered, grinning cheekily.

"Oh shut up, please!" Tallis snapped, "You really know how to be annoying...Andraste's Ass..."

"Thank you," Lana said, enjoying herself, "Imagine the length of time you're going to be stuck in here with me, Tallis. I'm going to drive you crazy."

The elf jumped to her feet, "Well in that case I'm going to try to pick this lock. I can't wait any longer."

"Be my guest," Lana teased, gesturing to the iron bars of the cell from where she lay relaxing on the cot with her hands behind her head. _Ah, bittersweet revenge._

* * *

"Andraste's granny-panties, we've been her before!" Isabela exclaimed, poking at the same crack in the wall. Varric started to giggle.

"You have a talent for fingering cracks Rivaini," he joked. The two of them burst into hysterical laughter, the wine having taken its toll.

"Oh, we should have brought someone else with us," Isabela chuckled, "Someone sensible and sober..."

The dwarf started to laugh again. "You must be drunk. Are you really suggesting we bring Aveline along for help?"

"Maker's bloody balls, no!" the pirate spat, "I just meant we should have brought her along to laugh at and tease."

"Oh," Varric chuckled, "That _would_ have been fun!"

"It's funny how many parties I go to end up like this," Isabela informed him. "Must be something in the water."

"Or must be something to do with you," Varric teased, "You really know how to irritate people. Such talent, Rivaini."

"It does mean fewer invitations though," she lamented. "My husband used to have hunting parties like these you know."

They were beginning to regain their composure a little as they walked down the unfamiliar path.

"I'd forgotten you were married," the dwarf replied, looking up at her.

"Well, I don't like to talk about it much," she said, avoiding his eye.

"So you normally spent your time running around the dungeons?"

"Mostly," she replied, a little sombre, "If I got out of hand, which was almost always, he would lock me away with a bottle of wine and a dirty book. Told everyone I was indisposed."

"And I'm sure you were," Varric replied cheekily. Isabela grinned down at him.

"You know me too well," she joked, throwing him a wink.

"Not really," he said, "I just happen to live a few rooms down from you in The Hanged Man."

"How lucky for you," Isabela said grinning. "Still, at least then I didn't have to waste time playing the hostess and taking cloaks from rich folk. They were so easy to steal from it became boring. I like a challenge every once in a while."

"Well at least I'm travelling through these dungeons with a professional," Varric teased.

"Hey, we're both professionals at wandering like drunken vagrants," the pirate replied. "Though I did spend some time in a prison in Val Chevin."

"And you broke out?"

"Broke in actually," Isabela corrected him, "To rescue my first-mate Casavir. Always liked him. Getting in was the easy part. Getting out was a bitch!"

"And I suppose he's dead now along with the rest of your crew?" Varric asked delicately.

"What?" Isabela blurted, "No! I left him on the docks, the idiot."

The two of them began laughing again and continued on, hoping they were at last going the right way. The dark corridors were so familiar it was becoming like a maze.

"I think it's this way," Varric said, pointing down a narrow hallway. "It doesn't look the same as the others."

"Hmm, worth a shot. Let's hope there's another bottle of wine at the end," The pirate replied, tossing the empty bottle behind her and hearing it smash.

They both turned right and began wandering along the stone floor. The effect of the wine was wearing off a little now and Isabela's worries about Hawke entered her mind again. _I'll get you out of here Hawke...and Tallis too I suppose. That's if she hasn't snuggled in beside you on a hard prison cot after a passionate sex session. _As much as the pirate tried to push the jealous thoughts from her mind she just couldn't. Seeing Hawke with Sister Leliana earlier had been hard enough, especially knowing they already had a history together. Seeing her with Tallis would be ten times worse, since Hawke had only recently started talking to her again. _But what would I do if I was stuck in a tight cell with a nice-looking piece of ass? _Isabela shuddered. _Don't think about that. Hawke wouldn't do that sort of thing...Actually she would. The woman's as bad as me sometimes. Shit! _With an uneasy feeling, the pirate led the way forwards, sprinting now. She hoped that Hawke could keep it in her pants before they got there.

"What's the rush?" Varric called behind her, speeding up to match her footsteps.

"I just can't wait to get out of here," Isabela lied.

"And you want to make sure Hawke's alright," Varric corrected.

"Don't start Varric. I don't want to talk about it," the Rivaini replied, trying to hide the worry from her voice.

"You've fallen for her Rivaini. I'm telling you!"

"Don't. Say. A. Word."

"Fine, have it your way."

* * *

The cell gate sprung open.

"How did you do that?" Lana asked, jumping up from where she lay, impressed by how little time Tallis needed to pick the lock.

"And you said I wasn't a real thief," the elf teased with a grin. "Come on, let's get out of here."

"We're not going to be able to do much naked," Hawke said, dashing out after her. "We need to find our things."

"I could think of a few things to do naked!" a female voice said from behind them. Tallis and Hawke almost jumped out of their skin as Varric and Isabela rounded the corner then, satisfied smiles on their faces.

"Took you long enough," Lana said to the dwarf. "How was the party?"

"I can't remember," the dwarf joked, "The wine's gone to my head."

"So...good then?" Lana teased. The four of them chuckled. Lana's eyes found Isabela's then. The pirate looked relieved to see her. She could see the worry in her amber eyes, even as Isabela tried to wrestle it back.

"You're alright...Of course you're alright," she said, exhaling. Lana gave her a small smile.

"I'm glad you came..."

After a few awkward moments of silence, Varric cleared his throat and clapped his hands together.

"Ok!" he said, "Let's find your gear and get out of here."

"Come on, I know a way!" Tallis called, setting off with Varric in tow. Lana and Isabela stared at each other for several more seconds before turning and following after them.

"Are you hurt?" The pirate asked, trying not to sound too concerned.

"I'm fine," Lana replied, staring dead ahead. "You?"

"More than fine, now that I found out _you're_ still alive. Who was I going to argue with if you were dead?" she asked sarcastically.

"Funny," Hawke replied dryly, "I can still withdraw my peace-offering you know."

"Ouch," Isabela said, "Then I best shut my mouth."

"That'd be a first," Lana teased, grinning at her.

"Oy!" the pirate exclaimed, "You were the one slinging insults, not me."

"You love it."

Isabela glanced at her out of the corner of her eyes, unable to help taking a glance down at her semi-naked body. She felt herself quiver as her mind flashed back to their sexual encounter all those years ago. _Maker's breath, she looks good! Why couldn't I have realised back then that I loved her? ...Why can't I get the balls to tell her now that I do?_ _I should have told her when I returned with the Tome...Now it's just too complicated.__ S_he swallowed over the lump in her throat. Lana turned to look at her, feeling herself burn under the pirate's gaze. Isabela fixed her eyes firmly ahead then, and continued to walk alongside her.

"You were staring at me," Hawke observed, feeling a little uncomfortable.

"Do you blame me?" the pirate asked with a grin. "I'm almost jealous that Tallis got to spend all that time half-naked in close proximity with you."

The words were meant as a joke but they came out sounding bitter and insecure. _Damn it!_

"Almost?" Lana repeated skeptically, not missing the tone with which Isabela spoke. She raised an eyebrow at the Rivaini.

"Almost," Isabela repeated, not wanting to elaborate. Hawke laughed a little under her breath and turned away, seeing Tallis and Varric turn right well a head of them. "Come on. Let's hurry. We don't want to lose them."

Isabela watched her sprint on ahead for a few moments, cursing her transparency, before taking off after her.

"I suppose you know she's an assassin already?" she asked as she caught up, eyeing Tallis with mistrust.

"I also found out she's Qunari."

The pirate stopped dead. "WHAT!?" she exclaimed, "You've got to be kidding me, Hawke!"

"Come on. We have to get out of here!" Lana said, doubling back and dragging the Rivaini by the arm when she didn't move. "Now's not the time for this."

"Now is the perfect time for this!" Isabela yelled, shaking out of her grip and stopping once more. "Whenever the Qunari are involved it's usually bad news."

"I know that better than anyone!" Lana said back bitterly. Isabela stared into her eyes, knowing what she was referring to. She could still see the pain that she had caused there. Her words failed for several seconds before she finally regained her voice.

"And yet you want _me_, of all people, to work with them?" she asked in disbelief.

"No," Hawke said firmly, "I want you to work with me, Isabela! Help me kill the Duke. But if that's too much to ask-"

"It isn't," Isabela interrupted, relaxing at once, "Just...don't drop me into any Qunari business, Hawke. I learned my lesson dealing with those bastards."

"Glad to hear it," Lana replied. "I wish I'd learnt mine."

As she turned away Isabela grabbed her arm, understanding her meaning. Yet another person had betrayed Hawke. _Bugger, it's becoming something of a tradition now...She doesn't deserve this shit._

"It's who you are Hawke," Isabela said gently, staring into her chocolate-brown eyes, "You're a trusting person...It's one of your better qualities, if I'm honest. Don't start to doubt yourself now."

"I doubted myself since the day you turned your back on me, Isabela," Lana replied weakly, her eyes beginning to sparkle with tears in the light of the nearest wall lantern. The pirate's jaw tightened. She released her arm and dropped her gaze, feeling so ashamed she was unable to look at her anymore. Hawke turned away and began to follow after the others again, who had stopped at the far end of the hall at an entrance to some caves.

"I'll prove to you that I can be trusted again, Hawke," Isabela called after her, hoping to at least be given the chance. _I'm done apologising._

"Prove it to yourself, Bela. You don't owe me anything." Lana replied, not looking back. "Now let's go...There's a royal decapitation to take place before we go home. You wouldn't want to miss that, would you?"


	30. Chapter 30

"_Yo! Hoe!"_

Hawke stopped dead just before the entrance to the caves, causing Isabela to walk right into her. Their heads collided with a sickening crunch. Lana spun around, feeling the sore spot with her hand. She glared at the now cursing pirate.

"What did you just call me?" she demanded angrily, feeling as though the back of her skull had cracked in two. "Hoe!?"

Isabela glowered at her, holding her forehead.

"I didn't say a damn thing, Hawke!" she replied angrily, as Tallis and Varric chuckled at the pair of them. "I thought it was you speaking!"

"Oh ,really? So is that why you decided to head-butt me then?" Lana snarled, grimacing as the pain in her head continued to throb. She cursed under her breath.

"It was a bloody accident! Next time warn people before you stop suddenly in front of them," Isabela spat, feeling her eyes watering from the pain. "Andraste's tits, that hurts!"

"Next time watch where you're walking instead!" Hawke replied, equally as angry. "If it wasn't you who spoke and it wasn't me, then who in The Maker's name was it?"

"_Over here!"_

The four of them jumped simultaneously and cast their eyes around, looking for the source of the voice. Lana's hand instinctively reached for her dagger...which wasn't there. She and Tallis were still out of luck in finding their weapons and armor, despite having searched a few nearby storage rooms.

"Damn it! Of all the times to be unarmed," Lana cursed. Isabela chuckled, knowing Hawke hated being without her weapons. _Just like I do. It brings an unsettling kind of nakedness._

"It's only a voice, Hawke. Try not to shit yourself," the pirate teased.

Seeing Isabela's second dagger still sheathed on her back (the other being in her hand), Hawke grinned impishly. She reached out quickly and snatched it.

"Oy! That's mine!" the Rivaini exclaimed in dismay, glancing back at her precious blade in Lana's hand.

"It's only a dagger, Bela. Try not to shit _yourself_," Hawke replied with a wink.

"Cheeky bastard," Isabela said, rolling her eyes, "That's my Heartbreaker, that is."

"I know," Hawke said with a smirk, "I recognized it."

"Funny," Isabela groaned, "You better give it back when you're done."

"Why? You can break hearts perfectly well without it," Lana teased, getting the double meaning before Isabela. The pirate threw her a dirty look. _Ha ha, because I broke Hawke's heart even without the dagger...Actually, now that I think about it that's not so funny. It's kind of true._

The corridor outside the entrance to the caves was completely empty apart from themselves. Varric aimed Bianca into the distance, waiting for the first sign of trouble.

"_Over here, you scurvy wench!"_

They jumped again, realising the voice was right beside them.

"Wench?" Isabela repeated amused. "I guess they're talking to Hawke then...whoever they are."

Lana glared at her. _Bitch. _The pirate grinned back at her cheekily.

"_Captain Isabela, sir! Over here!"_

The four of them flinched at the sound of another voice and turned to their right, finding themselves face to face with only three life-sized statues made of stone.

"That statue is talking to me," Isabela said, frowning at it. "Like, really talking to me! Balls...I think I've drank too much."

"Guess you're the wench then, not me," Lana said, sniggering.

"Oh, who are you trying to fool, Hawke?" the pirate replied cheekily, "You're a bigger wench than I am."

"Actually," Lana began, "I think you'll find that-"

"Oh, will you both be quiet?" Tallis interrupted, "My head hurts!"

"Maybe because you have no horns to protect it, Qunari," Isabela replied. "It's rude to interrupt people mid-argument. Didn't the ox-men teach you any manners?"

Varric and Hawke burst out laughing. Tallis looked beside herself with anger.

"Qunari are not a race, Isabela. They're a religion," she replied matter-of-factly.

"Even worse," the pirate replied, rolling her eyes, "Now where were we?...Ah yes, I was having a drink-related hallucination."

"Not for the first time," Lana added with a cheeky smile. Isabela elbowed her.

The four of them turned back to the three statues.

"_It's me, Captain," _The tallest one said, _"Paisley Pete! Crew of the Wicked Dancer. Helped you board that Nevarran brig."_

"I remember," Isabela replied bitterly, her mind flashing back to that particular job. _Maker's bloody balls, I'm talking to a statue, _she thought, feeling completely insane. "I also remember your Captain Maldine tried to claim all the booty, selfish prig."

"_Aye, and then he put a curse on us, the scurvy bastard," _the lady statue said_. "Only another Sea Captain can lift it. The damn Maleficar made it that way. Ever heard of the Dagger of The Four Winds?"_

"Obviously," Isabela answered, "But it's just a legend."

"_Maker's truth, Captain," _Paisley Pete replied,_ "It's as real as life. We pried the jewels off the hilt to sell to the Duke, but the curse Captain Maldine put on it caught up with us. Only when a rightful Captain puts the dagger back together and in its place, will the curse be lifted."_

Isabela chuckled, "And you want me to free you, I'm guessing?" she asked amused. "I assume you know my reputation is one of not giving a damn about anyone except myself. Isn't that right, Hawke?

"I don't think _Captain _Isabela will be much help to you," Lana interrupted, smirking, "She doesn't even have a pirate crew...or a ship."

Varric whistled, his eyes wide and turned to look at Tallis who tried not to laugh at Isabela's expense. Isabela turned to Hawke and glared at her. _Ouch! Sore spot!_

"Thanks for bringing that up," she said sarcastically, seeing the teasing look in Hawke's eye.

"_Pirate Captain's are more than a ship and the dirty cut-throats who sail with them. A real Sea Captain is a force of nature, like the sea herself," _Paisley Pete said to Hawke in a gruff voice.

"Hear that, Hawke? I'm a force of nature. A true sailor of the sea," Isabela said smugly.

"Well, unfortunately for you the only sea Isabela has sailed on recently is a sea of women," Lana replied to the statues. "A rose is a force of nature too, right? You know, a 'Blooming Rose'?"

Varric and Tallis sniggered, knowing Hawke was referring to the brothel in Kirkwall's Red Lantern District. Isabela's face fell. She knew the words were a joke but there was underlying hurt in Lana's tone that didn't sit well with her.

"Hawke..."

She stared at her, wanting to come clean about the fact that she hadn't slept with any one since leaving Kirkwall all those years ago, the fact that she couldn't even tonight with Elegant. _But in front of everyone? Forget it. I'd never hear the end of it, _she thought to herself, _ It wasn't like I had a choice anyway. _Her lengthy sabbatical from whores was (mainly) because she had been on her own for the most part of her disappearance and hadn't had the opportunity. _That would have taken some real willpower to refuse! _Being chased by the Felicisima Armada meant having little or no time for pleasure unless you wanted a dagger in your back. _They're such killjoys._ But even if there had of been someone at hand Isabela would have found it very difficult to sleep with them when her mind was clouded with thoughts of Hawke. And that was exactly what had happened tonight with Lady Elegant. It was also the reason why The Blooming Rose had lost one of its best customers (lest any of her friends notice).

"I'm joking, Bela," Lana replied slowly, noticing the pirate's change of demeanour. _Why's she looking at me like that? _Hawke thought, confused, _It's not like it isn't true. _Isabela pulled herself together at once, feeling the others staring at her. She turned back to the statues without a response, acting as though she wasn't bothered.

"Alright you scurvy buggers. Tell me where this mythical dagger is and let's get this over and done with. I'm not making any promises though."

* * *

"I can't believe we're going all the way back up here for some thieving pirates," Isabela complained as they finally found their way out of the dungeons and re-entered Duke Prosper's estate to find the Dagger of The Four Winds.

"Eh, Isabela..._You're_ a thieving pirate," Hawke reminded her. Everyone chuckled.

"I know, Sweetness. But at least I'm not stupid enough to get caught in some stupid pose and turned to stone like these idiots," she replied with a grin.

"Sweetness?" Hawke repeated, raising an eyebrow at her.

"Too soon?" the pirate guessed, glancing over at her.

"Definitely," Lana answered firmly. Isabela sighed.

"Nice try, Rivaini," Varric interjected, with a chuckle, "Next time wait until she's had a few whiskeys down her neck before you try that one again."

"Damn it, Varric! Whose side are you on?" Lana exclaimed loudly as he and Isabela started to laugh. Tallis glanced at all three of them, bewildered (like many others) as to the nature of the friendship between the trio. All she could hear were insults and teasings, something unaccustomed to someone who had lived among Qunari for a long time. The giant ox-men weren't exactly famous for their sense of humour. But there was a definite bond there somewhere between the three companions before her, a glue holding them all together. Tallis had a feeling it was Hawke. Something about the woman drew people to her, whether she wanted them there or not.

"Anyway," Hawke continued, when the others had finished chuckling, "We're back into the main hallway and-"

"Done with the party already are we? Such a shame!"

The four of them look up at the nearest balcony to find Duke Prosper standing over them. They readied their weapons at once (Tallis stealing a small blade from Varric) just as the Duke's men surrounded them.

"We have other plans," Hawke said in a joking tone, "Any chance of that free bottle of wine I won for catching the biggest Wyvern before we go? I'd hate to let it go to waste. And after all, you did promise me."

Duke Prosper laughed loudly.

"You have a lot of stones, Serah," he replied in his think Orlesian accent, "Alas it is not time for my guests to leave so soon. You will miss the main event."

"I could live with that," Lana said, looking up at him, "I really wasn't looking forward to trying that Wyvern soup, Duke Prosper. I was just being polite."

The Duke laughed again, though more dangerously this time.

"Your sense of humour, while amusing, will not save you, Champion," he said menacingly.

"Oh drat, how unfortunate," she teased. "Then I should point out that standing on a balcony won't save you either."

"Let them go Prosper. It's me you want!" Tallis yelled angrily.

"Actually what I want is for you and your friends not to hinder anymore of my plans," he replied. The Duke looked up at his men then, who were reigning down on Lana and her companions in the middle of the lavishly decorated hall, "Do your job and kill them Chasind. Is that not why I keep you around?"

As soon as he turned his back on them and walked away, gate's fell down behind him and the fighting broke out at once.

Lana braced herself as the Duke's Chasind bodyguard came charging towards her. She was very aware that she was still in her underwear now, with only a fancy dagger to protect her from the giant maul that was being swung viciously at her. _One hit from that thing and I'll be re-decorating the Duke's Chateau with my guts, _she thought, eyeing the massive weapon warily. The four of them scattered at once, dodging the oncoming onslaught of mauls, swords and throwing knives. Hawke dived to the side, the giant maul narrowly missing her, and landed on the ground roughly before rolling to the side and getting back to her feet in one swift motion.

"Don't you get tired of fighting the Duke's battles?" she teased, staring up into the beast-like face of her foe.

"I don't fight for him. He is a fool. I pick my own battles," he replied angrily, "And you are an enemy worth facing."

"Bugger, I really wish people would stop singling me out," Lana joked, twirling the dagger in her hand in a taunting way, inviting the Chasind to attack. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Isabela fighting three guards at once a short distance away, as consistent with one dagger as she was with two. _There's no way she's going to beat me. Got to kill more than her._

Lana ducked under another swing from the Chasind attacker and lunged forwards, sticking him with the pointy end of her dagger when he was off balance and then walloping him hard on the head with the hilt. He fell to the floor with a thud, blood dripping out from under him all over the precious Orlesian rug below. Without a seconds hesitation she engaged three new opponents, parrying away their oncoming attacks with a flurry of blocks before executing a killer combination of her own. It was a lot less fun with one dagger, but seeing the blood spurt from her enemies as she bested them brought about a satisfaction similar to that of sex. Hawke could see by the look of pleasure on Isabela's face that she felt the same way. The pirate was battling with another enemy as the others lay dead at her feet.

Lana glanced around looking for more. Across the hall she could see Varric in trouble. She dash through the makeshift battle field, felling four more enemies on her way before rescuing the dwarf from the hole he was being cornered into.

"Thanks, Hawke!" Varric called out, watching her victims fall to the ground.

"Anytime!" she called, before leaving him to it.

As she turned around, the fist of the giant Chasind she had stabbed earlier caught her in the face before she could block.

"Uff," she exhaled, feeling his knuckles bruise her jaw as her head flung back with the force. The dagger fell from her grasp as she staggered. There was a metallic taste of blood in her mouth. Spitting it onto the floor, Lana looked up just in time to shield herself from the next blow. The sheer size of the man's arms and the strength behind his punch combination was enough to knock her off her feet as a second and third punch came in from either side and caught her in her midsection.

"HAWKE!" Isabela yelled in warning, seeing the Chasind reaching for a nearby blade as Lana keeled over onto the floor in a heap. Hawke stirred a little at the pirate's continued shouts, feeling as though her rib cage had been shattered. Dazed, she stared up at the menacing Chasind, blood still pouring from his wound. He gained on her, raising the long-sword over his head ready to end her life.

"NO!" Isabela shouted, battling through the remaining guards to reach her. Varric and Tallis looked up in shock, seeing Lana collapsed on the floor, unable to defend herself. Time seemed to stand still for the three of them as they watched helplessly as the Chasind held the blade over his head, ready to administer the final swing.

In one swift movement, Isabela broke the neck of her nearest foe and instinctively slid her only dagger across the ground towards where Hawke lay. Lana felt it collide with her side painfully and rolled over grabbing it tightly in her right hand and feeling a swift breeze rush past her as the Chasind's sword collided with the marble floor where she had been laying moments before. She lunged upwards and pierced his side with the Backstabber, all the way up to the hilt.

"AARGGHH!" he yelled in anger, seeing Hawke roll away slowly and get to her feet. She picked up Isabela's other dagger and swung them both skilfully in her hands, waiting for him to charge again. He got up, stumbling slightly as he edged towards her, bleeding from both sides now. Raising his sword once more he made to swing. After a few seconds of threat however, the Chasind crumbled to the floor at her feet, finally having met his end.

Within a few minutes, the rest of the Duke's guards were dead. Hawke shook the blood off Isabela's blades and handed them back to her, trying to catch her breath.

"They handle pretty well," she said, impressed.

"Just like their owner," Isabela replied, smirking.

"Come on," Lana said, rolling her eyes, "Let's search for that dagger."

"And maybe our clothes as well?" Tallis asked, picking up a discarded sword at her feet.

"Actually I rather enjoy fighting naked. There's a lot more breeze. Armor's so restricting," Hawke joked. They all chuckled.

"It is rather distracting for those around you though," Tallis added, taking a sweeping glance at Lana's perfectly toned body, unable to hide her desire. Isabela noticed and threw the elf an icy stare, the smile sliding off her face at once. _Hands off, Qunari! Pirates don't share._

"I could say the same about you, Tallis," Hawke flirted, chuckling. Isabela's frown deepened.

"Oh, get a room!" she blurted out before she could stop herself. Varric laughed a little too knowingly for Isabela's liking.

"You know better than anyone that you don't need a room for that, Bela," Lana said, winking at her. The pirate bit her tongue. _She's just winding me up. _

Hawke chuckled slightly, holding her bruised ribs, feeling them cry out under the strain. She suddenly noticed her bra had been cut cleanly in two and she was half way towards flashing them all.

"Isabela!" she exclaimed, realising her breasts were almost spilling out over the top. "Thank you _so _much for the life-saving throw and everything, but Maker's Breath, you cut my damn undergarments with your dagger."

Isabela laughed loudly, leaning in for a better look. Hawke showed her the damage as Varric and Tallis joined them and began to laugh as well. There was a thin slice on her skin where the dagger had speedily slid across the floor and caught her on the side. The fabric of her undergarment was barely covering her.

"Look at that!" Isabela said impressed with herself. She was still giggling with the others as Hawke tried to hold her assets in, "I wasn't even trying. I guess when you have a talent, you have a talent."

"Well, you better have a talent for tying knots as well!" Lana replied frantically, making the pirate laugh even more. "Fix it for me!"

"Oh, come on, Hawke," she said, "You look better without clothes...and didn't you say you were getting used to fighting naked anyway?"

Hawke glared at her.

"Oh, Andraste's Ass!" Tallis blurted out, "You two are impossible! I'll tie the damn knot. Turn around, Hawke. Let me see."

As the elf made her way forwards, arms outstretched, Isabela intercepted her.

"I think Hawke prefers a rogues'... _touch_," she said, glaring at Tallis as she saw the desire rise in her eyes. "A _Rivaini _rogue to be precise."

Tallis looked taken aback at Isabela's insistence. The pirate was flashing her a menacing look. _That's right, Qunari. Put it back in your pants._

"As you wish," Tallis replied carefully, her jaw twitching, "But I think Hawke would prefer someone who won't..._hurt _her."

Isabela's eye narrowed, grasping her meaning. _Bitch thinks she knows me. She doesn't..._

"Enough!" Hawke interrupted, breaking the awkward silence and looking at them both in confusion, "Will someone just... tie the damn knot so we can move through the Chateau without me exposing myself?"

Tallis backed off, unwilling to mess with Isabela, and she and Varric led the way forwards as the Rivaini got to work.

"We'll go look for this dagger," Varric called over his shoulder. Tallis glanced back regretfully. The pirate shot her another look of warning before she began tying the two ends of Hawke's bra together, her hands lingering dangerously close to the woman's semi-naked breast. She felt Lana tense a little at her touch, uncomfortable with how close they were.

"Relax Hawke," the pirate said quietly when they were alone, "It's strictly business."

"Then what was all that about with Tallis just now," Hawke muttered back, feeling the pirate trying unsuccessfully to avoid brushing against her.

"She likes you. I was just warning her off."

"Warning her off?" Hawke asked, turning her head to look at Isabela. The pirate froze, staring into her eyes. Hawke sighed."You don't own me, Isabela..."

"I didn't claim to, Hawke," Isabela replied quickly, swallowing hard, "I just...Balls...Forget it."

"Just what?" Lana asked, seeing the pirate's eyes drop and focus a little too much on the knot she was trying to make with too-small pieces of fabric.

"Nothing," the Rivaini answered, avoiding her stare. Her jaw tightened. She pulled the tiny pieces together, forming a tight knot just under Hawke's bosom. Her hands lingered momentarily. Suddenly she felt Lana's hand cover hers.

"Isabela..."

The pirate looked up reluctantly, loosing herself in Lana's chocolate-brown eyes. The woman's hand on hers made her quiver. After several seconds, without warning, their faces began to draw closer. Hawke could feel Isabela's warm breath trickle across her face. Her eyes dropped, as she moved in, her hand still holding Isabela's. The pirate ran her free hand up Lana's arm and neck, before resting on her cheek, feeling to softness of her skin. She felt the woman flinch a little, her breathing quicken with every stroke. Just as their lips were about to meet, Lana hesitated, halting Isabela in her tracks.

"I..."

She pulled back, flustered, letting Isabela's hand fall away from her face.

"Hawke..."

Lana looked back up into Isabela's amber eyes, seeing the longing there. But this was all too much for her.

"I'm not doing this here, Bela," she said sadly, shaking her head, "It's too soon...It was a mistake what happened between us..."

"Don't say that," Isabela replied, feeling Lana's hand slip away from hers. She had no idea that words could hurt so much, "Don't ever say that..."

Lana bit her lip, still shaking her head.

"It's the truth," she whispered weakly, feeling the words tear from her chest and watching the pirate's face fall at their effect. Neither of them had any idea who leaned in first. It was almost like a reflex action. Hawke turned to walk away then, wishing she hadn't of looked into Isabela's eyes. _That's always been where my weakness lies. _

"You still love me, Hawke," Isabela called after her loudly.

Her words stung the air. Hawke froze, as though they had struck her. She turned around, feeling her eyes sting with angry tears.

"Since what was that ever the issue?" she asked bitterly, gazing at Isabela helplessly.

Isabela hesitated.

"I can't keep waiting for you to decide you want me, Bela. I can't keep kidding myself," Hawke continued.

"I do want you, Hawke," the pirate said, moving closer to her. Lana shook her head.

"But you don't love me?" she asked, as though she already knew the answer.

"I...Hawke..." Isabela's words failed her. _Say something..._ _Anything! Anything to stop her from walking away!_

Hawke snorted, a bitter smile forming on her face. "Just as I thought..."

She turned away again and made to follow the others, wiping away a tear which had fallen down her cheek.

"Hawke stop!" Isabela called after her. "WAIT!"

"Come on!" Lana called without looking back, "Let's just find this damn dagger and get out of this place. I've had just about enough of Chateau Haine and its so-called 'party'."

* * *

The four companions walked through the caves, searching for the way out which would lead them to the mountain top and out of Chateau Haine entirely. Lana couldn't wait to be rid of it. This had been the most agonizing party she had ever been too, even compared to that gathering all those years ago which her mother had organized. Between Isabela, Lady Elegant, Tallis, Bethany and the appearance of Leliana after such a long time apart, Hawke felt more drained in the last twenty-four hours than she had in the last three years.

"I still can't believe you made me give away that dagger," Isabela moaned, referring to her having to deposit of the Dagger of The Four Winds soon after they had found it to break the curse and free the three pirates made of stone.

"It was the right thing to do, Bela," Hawke replied, walking alongside her behind the others. "You weren't really going to leave them like that, were you?"

"No," she admitted reluctantly, "But it was so shiny!"

"It was cursed!" Hawke replied, giving her a weird look, "Don't tell me you wanted to keep a cursed dagger."

"But it wasn't harmful to me," Isabela countered. She sighed then. "Oh, balls, maybe you're right...as usual."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lana asked, frowning.

"You know..." Isabela began, "You're always influencing me to do stuff, Hawke, against my better judgement."

"Like what?"

Isabela looked at her, "Like bringing back the Tome of Koslun! Freeing stupid pirates from a curse! Not sleeping with El-Nevermind."

"Not sleeping with who?" Hawke asked at once, as the pirate cut off mid-sentence. Isabela looked dead ahead, silently cursing herself for what had escaped her mouth. _Shit! _

"No one," she replied distantly, avoiding her eye.

"Isabela?" Hawke questioned, putting a hand on her arm, "Who were you talk-"

"I said no one alright!" the pirate snapped angrily, pulling away from her touch and turning to glare at her. Lana was taken aback.

"I...Fine," she replied, a little confused t the pirate's retort. "Don't tell me then..."

Silence fell between the two of them at once and they continued to follow Tallis and Varric further into the caves. As she walked, Isabela berated herself over and over again for almost having revealed her rejection of Lady Elegant's 'splendours' earlier on that night. She was still a little confused by her actions and, truth be told, embarrassed as well. Never before had she given up on a sure thing like that. _Why couldn't I go through with it? Elegant's actually pretty good once she get's going._ The pirate played back the event in her head, trying to find out what it actually was that made her stop when Elegant had mentioned Hawke and Leliana kissing. _Jealousy? Love? Anger? Hurt? Betrayal? _She couldn't comprehend any of the words which were flying through her head. When Hawke had asked her whether she loved her back at the Chateau, Isabela didn't know what to reply. Originally she thought that if the topic came up it would be easy to admit. But Isabela knew that once she admitted being in love, her life would be turned upside down and even now she wasn't sure whether she really wanted it. She loved her life. Loved being the Captain of a ship, sailing across the Eastern Sea, getting drunk with dangerous vagrants, exploring the depths of both men and women alike, stealing precious jewels, and all the while not knowing if she would live to see the sunrise the next morning. It was exhilarating, exciting, and she didn't want to change it for anyone. _Not even Hawke? _The question stuck uncomfortably in her throat and she swallowed hard, forcing it to the back of her mind unanswered.

"Ok this is it. The way out," Tallis informed them, hovering beside the exit to the mountains. She rounded on Hawke once more. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

Lana nodded, "I told you already, Tallis. I'll help you."

The elf smiled at her. "Now's the time to turn back if you change your mind."

"Oh good, I'll see you later then," Isabela said, turning on her heel. Lana reached out and grabbed her hand as she tried to pass her. One look from those chocolate-brown eyes had the Rivaini turning back towards Tallis and waiting with the rest of them.

"Thank you," Tallis said, staring at Isabela. "I know this can't be easy for you."

"Just get it done," The pirate answered bitterly, distancing herself from Hawke. Tallis nodded.

"Let's go," Hawke said, leading the way.

The four of the walked through the exit (some a little reluctantly) and found themselves at the top of the same mountains they had been hunting Wyverns on earlier.

"Déjà vu anyone?" Hawke joked, noticing their familiar surroundings.

"Ghast hole," Varric said chuckling. The others laughed.

"Is it just me or are there a lot more dead Tal-Vashoth lying around than before?" Isabela interjected. The others scanned the mountainside, seeing the bodies of around a dozen dead ox-men

"Let's get down to the base of the mountain," Tallis said, "Salit must already be here. I'm pretty sure that's where the exchange will take place."

"Makers Breath, does that mean we have to run down the mountain?" Isabela asked after her, "I don't remember signing on for a marathon."

"Stay here if you want," Tallis called back, "I bet the Wyverns would love the taste of Rivaini meat."

The pirate groaned, "Fine, I'm coming," she relented, sprinting after the rest of them.

* * *

"Let's get this over with, Qunari. Before your assassins find us," Duke Prosper said, speaking to the imposing Qunari entourage before him. Both parties withdrew their weapons simultaneously, each wary of the other. Then, unexpectedly, the tallest Qunari in the party, shoved his spears in the ground and made his way forwards, withdrawing a golden scroll in his hand.

"That's Salit!" Tallis whispered to Hawke, crouched beside her as they overlooked the meeting. "I'm going to get closer. Cover me!"

Hawke watched the elf drop down from an impossible height and land perfectly on her feet before hiding behind another rock at the foot of the cliff they were on. The four of them turned their eyes back to the exchange, simultaneously meandering down the rough mountain path getting into a more advantageous position.

"This is a list of names!" Duke Prosper exclaimed loudly, "We expected the Gatlock formula, dreadnought plans, anything but this. This is useless!"

"You asked for a weapon," Salit said in a deep voice, "We have provided one."

Just then Hawke entered the clearing, Isabela and Varric in tow.

"Well, well, if it isn't the Champion," Duke Prosper said, grinning, "Still naked I see."

"I'd like my things back," she said, noticing her clothes peek out of a satchel at the Duke's feet. "And then I can go home."

The Duke and his men started to laugh.

"Pah!" he spat, throwing the bag towards her, "Take your filthy garments then. I have no use for such horrible fabric!"

"Hitting me where it hurts...My fashion sense," Hawke joked, scrambling to put on her clothes.

"Joke while you can, Champion. You will not find it funny for long," the Duke replied. When Hawke had withdrawn her things from the bag she tossed it to the side, behind the stone where Tallis was lingering, allowing her to get changed as well.

"Not saving the remains for your little elven friend?" the Duke asked, surprised.

"Tallis," Salit said to himself, as though knowing she would be here. "I told her I would slay her if she tried to stop me."

"She's late," Hawke replied, "Unlike her I have an excellent sense for dramatic timing...and good hair. But I think she won't mind if I kill you without her."

"If anyone is to do any killing it will be me!" the Duke replied, shoving his scroll back to one of his guards blindly. Hawke spotted a familiar face smile gleefully behind him, as he handed it to her unknowingly. Suddenly the Duke pulled out a weird-looking crossbow and aimed it at his Qunari business partner, shooting a horrible green, sticky substance at him.

Salit growled, staring down at his torso in confusion. All of a sudden the cries of a wyvern echoed throughout the mountainside. Everyone looked up in surprise, scattering to the side at the sight of the Duke's pet wyvern from the party swooping down to catch Salit in its mouth, then tearing him to pieces.

"Kill them all!" Prosper shouted insanely.

The three-way fight broke out at once. Lana caught the blade Isabela tossed towards her and charged with the rest of them, spotting her daggers in one of the guard's hands. _They're mine, you bastard._ She ran to him first, dodging his attacks and burying Isabela's Heartbreaker in his chest. Blood spurted from his mouth, showering her recently-added clothing. She used her foot to push him off the end of her blade and stared down at herself in dismay. _Typical! _Seeing the guard fight to stay alive, Lana tossed the Heartbreaker back to a busy Isabela and leaned over him.

"I'll take these back, thank you very much," she said happily, picking up her beloved daggers again. The guard gurgled blood at her in response. She chuckled before turning away, running to take the pressure off Isabela who was surrounded by two Qunari and another Orlesian guard.

"Leave them, Hawke!" Tallis called, intercepting her. "Get the Duke!"

Lana obeyed, turning away and staring across the clearing to see Duke Prosper sitting atop his beloved wyvern, trying to direct his crossbow at Varric, who was battling a short distance away. She ran towards him before springing into the air and tackling him. They both fell from the wyvern's saddle and began to wrestle on the ground. The Duke fell backwards with Lana on top of him, his weapon falling from his hand. Hawke dropped one of her blades in the process of the scuffle. As soon as she got on top, she held the other one to his throat, seeing his hand begin to bleed as he grabbed the blade, preventing her from cutting his throat.

"You're going to regret putting me in that cell," she growled, pushing down harder against him. His teeth were bared, trying to resist her strength. He struggled underneath her, trying with all his might to escape. Suddenly Lana felt a sharp pain in her thigh.

"Ugh!" she groaned, falling limply onto of him. He pushed her to the side and got back to his feet picking up his crossbow and climbing back onto the wyvern's saddle. Hawke gasped for breath. Looking down, she saw the shining silver of a small knife protruding from the inside of her thigh. Then she was assaulted by green-goo, the same substance which the Duke had shot at Salit to entice the Wyvern.

In once painful movement, Hawke tried to wrench the knife out of her leg to no avail. She scrambled to her feet, dagger in hand as the wyvern raced towards her, Duke Prosper riding it like a horse. The mountain shook with its heavy footsteps, causing the other fighters to turn and stare. At the last-minute Hawke dived to the side, swinging her blade at the beast's leg and watching it lose its footing. She spun around, just in time to see it slide on its stomach and fall over the edge of the cliff along with the Duke.

Lana limped towards the edge, sensing her companions behind her. The other guards must have either been killed by now or ran off. She leaned over the edge, feeling dizzy as she realised how far up they were. _Ugh, I think I'm afraid of heights._ Suddenly a bloody hand reached up and grabbed her foot.

"...All...All of you will die...screaming...I swear it," Duke Prosper wheezed, staring up at her with loathing.

"Really?" Hawke asked amused, "Why don't you show us how it's done?"

She kicked away his hand causing the Duke to lose his grip. He began to fall.

"ARRRGGGHHHH!"

His voice eventually drifted off and they saw him crash painfully off a rock.

"You see that?" Isabela asked amused, "He bounced."

Varric and Tallis laughed.

"Bastard," Lana muttered, dropping to the ground. She looked down at the silver knife sticking out of the inside of her leg and tried to wrench it out again. The blade was wedged in deep, causing the blood to gush out as she removed it, turning the ground red.

"Sister!"

The four of them turned around in surprise to see Bethany, Aveline and Merrill walking towards them. Well, walking wasn't exactly the right word. Bethany was sprinting as she spotted Lana bleeding on the ground and Aveline was directing a staggering Merrill over to them, her hand around her waist. As soon as they caught up, Bethany fell to her knees beside her sister.

"You're hurt!" she exclaimed worriedly, touching Lana's leg. Lana avoided her eyes.

"What do you care?" she said dryly, shaking her off and helping herself to her feet.

"Lana please," Bethany said, "I know you must hate me right now but...Let me heal you at least."

"I'm fine," Hawke replied firmly, without looking at her.

"Hawke," Isabela began, as the others looked on, "The wound's pretty deep. Your leg's pouring with blood. Let her help."

Lana stared at her, wondering why she was taking Bethany's side. _They probably had a good laugh about me back at the party when I was searching for the vault with Tallis, _she thought angrily.

"Whatever," she replied, "Do it then if it will make you feel better...But this doesn't change a thing."

Bethany tried to hide her sadness as she bent down and began to heal her older sister's leg with magic. The wound stitched itself together, stopping the blood from flowing immediately. Bethany straightened up then.

"I'm sorry, Lana," she said gently, placing a hand on her arm, "For everything..."

Hawke turned her back on her. "Let's go home," she said dully, "I'm sick of this place."

"Where's the Duke?" Aveline asked, bewildered.

"He took a little tumble off the cliff," Isabela answered, "Want to join him?"

Aveline glared at her. "Shut up, Whore!"

Qunari words caught Hawke's ear and she turned away from the bickering behind her towards where Tallis lay beside Salit's dismembered body. The elf straightened up.

"Thank you," she said, "There's no way I could have done this without your help. If the Duke only knew what he had in his hand...I dread to think." She stowed the golden scroll in her pack.

"So what now? You aren't just going to leave are you?" Lana asked.

Tallis laughed. "You think I would fit into your merry entourage?" she asked. They both glanced back at the bickering companions behind them. Lana laughed as well.

"Better than most," she said with a grin.

"Maybe some other time Hawke," she said, smiling at her, "I have some other things to do...I am grateful for all your help though."

"Happy to be of service," she replied. "You've changed my opinion of Qunari."

"Really?" Tallis asked excitedly.

"No."

The elf rolled her eyes.

"If it weren't for Isabela, I'd give you a kiss right now," she admitted a little shyly. Hawke smirked.

"Afraid of her?" she teased.

"Not really," Tallis replied, "I just don't want to mess up what you two have got going...You may fool each other Hawke, but I see right through you both. You care about each other more than you think."

This time Lana rolled her eyes. "Stick to killing rogue Tal-Vashoth, Tallis," she joked, dismissing her comment. "Isabela and I are too complicated to be analysed."

"You got that right," the elf replied. "Oh, before I forget!" She tossed Hawke a giant ruby jewel. "That was supposed to be the Heart of The Many. I did promise you a jewel. Take care of yourself, Hawke. Maybe we'll meet again."

"Goodbye, Tallis," Hawke called after her, pocketing the jewel in her discarded backpack by the rocks. All of her possessions still seemed to be inside thankfully. She picked it up and slung it over her back before turning back to the others.

"Ready to head back to Kirkwall?" she asked. Isabela smirked at her.

"Like you wouldn't believe."


	31. Chapter 31

Lana lay in the bath tub in her Hightown Estate, eyes closed, trying to relax during one of the precious few moments she had all to herself. The warm water brushing gently against her skin, the complete silence and the deep, calming breaths in and out would unfortunately do nothing to help ease her aching muscles and overworked mind however. She opened her eyes, sighing in frustration and stared down at her scarred, naked body, seeing the continued tension in her perfectly toned figure. Straightening up into a sitting position, she reached down and brought a slender finger over the oval-shaped scar on the inside of her left thigh, still feeling some pain there despite her little sister's healing skills. It had been two weeks since they returned from Chateau Haine. In that time Hawke had barely seen or spoken to any of her friends because of the constant work she was doing for not only Knight-Commander Meredith, but now her opposite number as well, First Enchanter Orsino. Apparently the Templars and mages were beginning to form allegiances with each other against the obvious tyranny of Meredith, and who should they turn to for help? _Me, of course..._Lana exhaled again and lay her head back down against the stone tub. She closed her eyes once more, trying to shake the troubling thoughts from her mind and begging herself to unwind before something interrupted her much-needed peace and quiet. No sooner had the thought entered her head when there was a knock at the door downstairs.

**Thud! Thud! Thud!**

Hawke opened her eyes and stared up at the ceiling. _You can't be serious! Who would be calling at this time? _She groaned and closed her eyes once more, anticipating Bodhan or Sandal to answer it. After a few seconds, the door knocked again.

**Thud! Thud! Thud!**

Lana stayed where she was, straining her ears to try to hear the light plodding footsteps of her faithful, dwarven manservant walk to the door. Suddenly her eyes flung open. She just remembered she had sent Bodhan and Sandal off for a few days vacation yesterday and that she was alone in the house. Hearing the door knock for the third time, Lana cursed loudly and reluctantly climbed out of the bath tub, wrapping a towel around her and thinking to herself that she was definitely losing her mind.

Making her way downstairs in light, slippery footsteps, Hawke then grabbed a dagger from her weapons rack in the hallway just in case. _The friends I've made over the last couple of years are a constant warning of the type of people I tend to attract._ Holding the small towel around her with her free hand, Lana reached out and opened the front door a crack.

"Hey, bad timing?"

There, standing before her in the lashing rain stood Isabela. The pirate glanced down at the apparent nakedness of her host, unable to stop herself. Hawke tried to hide the surprise from her face and yanked the towel up further, covering her visible cleavage.

"Isabela," she said, confused and a little flustered, "What-What are you doing here?"

The Rivaini grinned her favourite crooked smile and shrugged.

"I was in the neighbourhood," she said simply, "I just thought you might like some company."

Hawke sighed. She threw her dagger back onto the rack and ran a hand through her wet hair.

"Bela..."

Isabela held up her left hand in surrender. "Not _that _type of company," she said with a chuckle seeing her words had their desired effect. She pulled a bottled of whiskey out from behind her back with her other hand then, giving Lana a questioning look. "I just...well, we haven't really talked since the Dukes party and I just thought you might want to...Oh, never mind, it was a stupid idea."

The pirate turned on her heel then, seeing the reluctance on Hawke's face. She began to walk away, cursing herself for even thinking Lana would have agreed. Hawke bit her lip as she watched her go, unsure of whether or not to stop her.

"Bela, wait!" she called finally, unable to see her walking alone into the rain on such a cold night. Isabela turned back, surprised. Hawke stood back then and opened the door wider. She threw the pirate a small smile.

"It would be a shame to let good whiskey go to waste," she joked, holding the door open invitingly. A relieved smile appeared on Isabela's face and she walked back and entered the estate. Hawke closed the door tightly behind her and led the pirate into the living area. They took up two armchairs in front of the blazing fire. Isabela grabbed Hawke's red robe which was drying on a clothes-horse beside it and held it open for her.

"I can safely say this is the first time I've offered to put clothes on a woman instead of take them off," she said grinning, "So if I were you I'd take me up on it while you can."

Lana hesitated momentarily before turning and reluctantly allowing the pirate to help her into the robe, dropping the towel at her feet. She tried not to shiver at her touch. Isabela swallowed hard, feeling the warmth of the woman's skin through the fabric. Her hands lingered on the collar momentarily before Hawke pulled away and tied both sides around her naked body with the thin belt.

"Thanks," she muttered, avoiding the pirate's eyes. "I'll go get us some mugs."

Isabela watched after her as Lana made her way into the other room. _The same room, strangely enough, where her mother seen us kissing all those years ago, _the pirate thought to herself, her mind flashing back to that disastrous moment which changed everything between them. _Not to mention revealed Hawke's long kept secret about her sexuality. _What Isabela wouldn't have given to follow her into that room right now and pick up from where they had been interrupted. _That would be foolish though...I have to show her that I can be trusted again._

A few moments later, Lana reemerged with two pewter mugs.

"Gamlen stole my good ones so we'll have to make do with these," she said grimly, placing the mugs down on the small table in between the two armchairs. They both took a seat.

"Still stealing from you?" Isabela asked, shaking her head, "Greasy bastard."

"You're one to talk," Lana replied, attempting a joke with her dulcet tone. The pirate laughed.

"I don't steal from my friends, Hawke. Where's the fun in stealing a few mugs when there are plenty of other precious artifacts that need to change hands?" she replied, opening the bottle of The Hanged Mans finest and pouring them both generous servings. She handed a mug to Lana and held up her own. "What should we toast to?"

Lana smiled as best she could, "To my day off from being somebody's bitch?" she suggested. They both laughed and clinked mugs, before knocking back their whiskey in one.

"Maker, I needed that," Isabela said, placing her mug back on the little table. Lana silently agreed, doing the same. The pirate began to pour them another helping.

"So what's got you slumming it in Hightown on such a cold night?" Hawke asked, leaning back into her armchair and crossing her bare legs. Isabela leaned over and handed her a refilled mug before settling back into her own chair.

"Well," she began, staring at Lana, "It's been a while you know, since we've just...talked."

"I didn't feel like talking," Hawke said coldly, peeling her gaze away from Isabela's and staring into the dancing flames in the grate. Isabela smirked.

"Is that why you've been avoiding me?" she asked, tilting her head at her, "You didn't really think I hadn't noticed did you?"

Hawke's eyes darted over to the amber ones observing her. For the past two weeks, anytime Isabela's presence had been mentioned she had ducked out, leaving Varric and the rest of her friends with a lot of unfinished drinks in The Hanged Man. _So she noticed then, _Hawke thought to herself.

"I wasn't avoiding you," she lied, "I just... had to leave."

Isabela sighed, the smile falling off her face. "Look Hawke," she said, shifting uncomfortable in her chair, "I know I'm wrong about a lot of things, but don't lie to me about this."

Hawke turned back to the fire again, taking a sip of whiskey and exhaling loudly. She leaned over, resting her arms on her knees. Her head dropped and she began to swirl the whiskey in her mug.

"I just..." she shook her head, trying to find the words, "I... find it difficult to be around you, Bela."

Isabela frowned. "I know I've hurt you Hawke but...I'm starting to think that this isn't just about me anymore. Am I wrong?"

Lana sighed, still staring into the depths of her mug. "No," she replied grimly.

"Then what is it?" Isabela asked, wondering what it was making Hawke wear a permanent frown on her face every time she seen her. Hawke leaned back in her chair then, with a quick glance up at the ceiling and a shake of the head.

"I..."

Isabela leaned closer, "Hawke," she said, placing a hand on her chair, "Just tell me."

"It's... me," Lana replied, helplessly, "I just...I just can't let go of the past, Isabela."

She got to her feet and placed her mug down on the table, before walking to the fireplace and leaning over it with one hand, staring down into the flames again. Isabela placed her mug on the table and got to her feet as well. She approached Hawke and placed a gentle hand on her back.

"You're so tense," she said shocked, feeling Lana's contracted muscles from under the thin robe. It was as thought they hadn't unravelled in years.

"I know," she replied weakly, "I'm finding it hard to..._unwind_...Drinking helps."

Isabela smiled a little at the half-hearted joke. _She really loves joking at the worst times. _

"How long has this been going on, Hawke?" she asked worriedly, running her hand along Lana's stiff shoulder gently and massaging it a little. She felt her sigh, not speaking for several seconds. "Hawke?"

"Since the day my mother died..."

Isabela's mouth fell open slightly. She didn't know what to say. Now she understood why Hawke found it hard to be around her. The events of that haunting day still tortured the dreams of every person present in that horrible place. The image of Leandra Hawke, tortured by a necromancer and asking for forgiveness as she lay dying in her eldest daughter's embrace was still hard to think about. In the end, it was what forced Lana to look for comfort in Isabela's arms in the first place. She went against her better judgement which told her what everyone already knew: that Isabela would hurt her in the end. _And I did, _the pirate thought to herself, watching the shell of her former-friend as she tried not to crack into tiny pieces.

"Hawke I...I'm sorry," she said, feeling inadequate as she so often did in these types of situations. _But I'm responsible for this, at least in part .I can't abandon her again._

"Don't be," Lana replied with a snort, "It's not your fault. It's my issue. Four years she's been gone and she still has a hold over me. I can still hear her warnings and accusations in my ear...It's pathetic."

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" The pirate asked, squeezing Lana's shoulder comfortingly. Hawke looked up at her.

"Tell them what? To leave me alone because I haven't had time to myself to grieve for my non-existent family?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

The pirate shrugged, "I don't know, I mean I'm sure the Big Girl would have helped you out or something, or Varric. Why didn't you tell them?"

"Would you?"

Isabela didn't answer. _No, _she thought to herself, _I wouldn't tell a soul. _The pirate cursed under her breath. She and Hawke were their own worst enemies sometimes. She pulled a lock of Lana's dark brown hair back out of her face and tucked it behind her ear. For four years the woman had carried this grief, along with everyone else's. Isabela knew a day would come when she simply couldn't continue taking shit from everyone as well as keeping her own in check. The stress over the past eight or nine years was bound to catch up eventually. And now it had. And there was no Malcolm, no Leandra, no Carver and not even Bethany to free Lana from the burden they had all left on her.

"Look Hawke, I know you won't believe me when I say this, but I'm here for you," Isabela said staring into her chocolate-brown eyes. "I wasn't much comfort to you back then when Leandra died, and when Bethany was taken by the Templars... but I'm better at it now...I've changed."

"I don't want you to change, Bela," Lana said, shaking her head, "I never did. All I wanted was you...but you made it so _damn _difficult."

"I know I did," she groaned, "That's the difference between us, Hawke. I spent my whole life taking care of myself because no one would, and you spent yours looking after everyone else because you could. I'm still not able to open up to anyone emotionally. I just...don't think I'm capable of it."

"And that's why this was never going to work," Lana whispered, her face falling. She walked away and sat back down on her chair. Isabela's hand dropped to her side. She followed her, kneeling down in front of her and touching her leg.

"But our friendship can," she said, staring into her eyes, "Balls Hawke, you're the best damn friend I've had in possibly forever. And if you tell anyone that I'll deny it tooth and nail but...It's true."

Hawke looked into her amber eyes, seeing that she was being honest. She swallowed hard.

"I can't switch off my feelings, Isabela," she replied, her eyes filling up, "As much as I want to, I just can't!"

"I didn't ask you to, Sweetness," Isabela said painfully, touching her cheek. "Just don't write me off just yet."

"Why shouldn't I?" Hawke asked, a tear falling down her cheek, "Maker's Breath, I can't keep kidding myself any longer. Why should I keep doing this to myself, Bela?"

"Because I lov-I don't want to lose you!" Isabela said loudly, correcting herself mid-sentence. _Balls, why can't I just say it!? Damn it!_

"Then tell me how we can move on," Hawke said weakly, too upset to notice her slip up, "Because I'm all out of ideas..."

Isabela go to her feet and grabbed her mug of whiskey off the table, downing it. She began to pace the floor, thinking to herself. She knew she should have come clean about her feelings but it was so difficult for her. After years of turning off her emotions it was hard to just switch them on again. _There must be some way to keep Hawke close, but at a safe distance._

"How about we go back to just being business partners?" she suggested. "You help me out, I help you, just like how it used to be in the beginning."

"That's it?" Hawke asked skeptically, staring up at her.

"For now at least," Isabela said nodding, "It will give you some much-needed distance from all the stress and give us both time to think about what we really want."

"I thought that was why you left in the first place, Bela," Lana reminded her. Isabela said nothing. Hawke didn't have any idea just how much thinking she had done all those years on the run. _And I can't find it in myself to admit it._ Hawke considered her proposal for a second. She couldn't see how being business partners would be any different from being friends. _I mean weren't we always just helping each other out? _But it did mean not spending time alone with each other. No more drinks together in The Hanged Man, no more torturous near-misses and needless jealousy. They were free to do what they wanted, who they wanted. Was this the only way forwards for them? To take two steps back?

"Fine," Lana said sadly, seeing no other way. "So, I guess we finish this bottle of whiskey tonight and then...that's it."

Isabela seated herself down in her armchair again. "Guess so..."

She poured them both another mug of whiskey, draining the bottle and held Hawke's out to her, waiting.

"Shall we toast to it?" she asked grimly, already feeling as though this was a bad idea. Her breath caught as she pierced Lana's chocolate-brown eyes with her amber ones. Hawke swallowed hard.

"To sweet sacrifice," she said over the lump in her throat.

"To bittersweet sacrifice," Isabela corrected, "For the good of your health and my sanity."

Reluctantly the two women clinked mugs, closing a door (how ever temporarily) on their feelings towards one and other and sacrificing what could have been for the survival of their continued working relationship together (because truth be told that was the only relationship between them which could function efficiently). As the two women raised the whiskey to their lips they couldn't help both thinking how ironic it was that their companionship had started with a drink and now it was ending with one.

When they had finished, both got to their feet. They stared at each other for a few seconds before Isabela reached out a hand. Lana shook it, feeling a chapter of her life finally close, allowing her to let go of the past.

"I forgive you, Isabela," she said earnestly, not wanting to let her go. Isabela smiled at her.

"Thank you," she replied, relieved to finally hear those words, "I promise I won't betray you like that again, Hawke. You have my word."

They let each other go then. An awkward moment of silence passed as neither wanted to leave. Even if it was for the greater good, neither of them wanted to turn their backs on each other.

"I'll be in touch when I need you," Lana said. "Don't go too far."

Isabela nodded and turned away, making her way towards the front door. She hovered in the hallway and glanced back at Lana who was watching her go.

"Take care of yourself, Hawke," she said heavily. "For me...You look terrible."

Without another word the pirate opened the front door and walked out into the rain, closing the door behind her with a definitive snap.

* * *

"So how are things, Hawke? I feel as though we haven't spoken in an age."

Lana leaned against the stone wall in Aveline's office as the Guard Captain rifled through her mountain of paperwork. She gazed out the window, happy to be inside away from the bustling Hightown and its many admirers. Nowadays, even three years after her defeat of the Arishok, it was still hard for her to go about her business without being harassed by both children and adults alike.

"Fine," Lana replied simply, staring up through the window bars into the bright, mid-day sky. The Guardswoman looked up at her, frowning.

"Really Hawke? That's all you're going to give me?" she asked, her quill poised over a blank piece of vellum which she was using to write the next duty roster. Lana shook herself back to her senses and dropped herself onto the wooden chair in front of the Captain's desk.

"Sorry Av," she replied, rubbing her eye, "I haven't really been myself lately."

"Why do you think I was asking?" Aveline said, "Hawke when was the last time you slept?"

Lana considered this, "Hmm, about three days ago," she said dully.

"I'm serious, Hawke," Aveline blurted angrily. Maker she hated it when Lana joked when she was trying to have a serious conversation with her. Hawke gave her a strange look.

"So am I, Av..."

The Captain put down her quill and observed her friend more closely then. There were dark circles under her eyes and she didn't seem to be at all there. As though the lanterns were lit but no one was home. Aveline folded her hands and leaned over the desk.

"How come?" she asked, concerned. Hawke laughed a little.

"Come on, Aveline. Do you really have to ask?" she replied, sighing then. The Guardswoman's lips pursed.

"Isabela," she stated, a little angrier than before. Lana looked up then.

"No," she replied, half-amused at Aveline's answer, "For the first time in years I can safely say that Isabela is the last thing on my mind. I haven't really spoken to her in the last few months, unless you count talking business."

"Hmm, I suppose you haven't," Aveline said, considering this. Chateau Haine had been months ago, despite the feeling as though it was only yesterday. The last time the Guardswoman had seen them together was two weeks ago while on business for First Enchanter Orsino. They were very civil to one another. No jokes, no flirting, just straight up business. "So if it isn't Isabela, then who?"

"Bethany," Lana sighed, "She's been sending me letter after letter, trying to get me to speak to her again."

"Oh," Aveline replied, remembering how the two sisters had left things back a Chateau Haine, "And have you wrote back?"

Hawke shook her head, "What would I say, Av? Sorry Sister, you blamed me for our mother's death so I never want to see you again?...I pretty much told her that back at the Duke's party. If it hurt that much saying it once, imagine saying it for a second time."

Aveline silently agreed. There was no use repeating such cold words to Bethany. As much as a front that she put on, she was a sensitive girl inside. She had already been hurt enough. But something about the youngest Hawke's demeanour had changed since they had returned from Chateau Haine. She was now sending regular letters to Lana with inside information on the allegiances between the mages and Templars in the Circle and was telling Hawke of the daily goings-on inside the Gallows, providing her with a reliable source to help her do her work for the Knight-Commander and Orsino. For someone who had distanced herself from her older sister for so many years, why was she suddenly so ready and willing to get in touch and try to repair their non-existent relationship? It was a question that had caused Lana many sleepless nights.

"I suppose you're right," the Guardswoman relented, "Why don't you go home and take a rest though, Hawke? You look dead on your feet."

"I thought you wanted to talk?" Lana asked, confused, "I know how you love to have nice, girly chats, Aveline. And I'm surprised that after all this time you haven't commented on me and Sister Leliana. Why do you think I'm here? Give it your best shot."

Aveline glared at her as she smirked back. It was true she had been itching to ask about Sister Leliana's involvement in the story between Hawke, Isabela and Bethany ever since they had been reunited back at Chateau Haine. There seemed to be more than just simple history there. And she never could resist an opportunity to tell Lana off for something. But the woman just didn't look up to a good chin-wag.

"I'll save my questions for later, Hawke. Just go get some sleep. I'll give you a tonic."

The Captain searched in one of her desk drawers for a small, corked bottle with a greeny-grey liquid inside and tossed it to Hawke, who caught it in one hand.

"What's this?" she asked, holding it up into the light. "Has the Guard Captain been working under the influence?"

Aveline rolled her eyes. "It's a legal potion, Hawke. We don't all buy Worthy's strange concoctions with our friends and spend entire weekends out of our tree, like you and Isabela do."

Lana chuckled, having almost forgotten the time a few years back when she and Isabela had mixed one of the dwarf Worthy's 'home-made' potions into their whiskey and drank it. Neither of them could remember any specific thing they had done that weekend. All they knew was that it was a good one. Isabela had woken up in the Chantry, bound by her hands and forced to listen to the Chant of light having ordered the 'Bad Girl Special' at The Blooming Rose and Lana found herself completely naked, tied to a headboard in a random tavern on the outskirts of the city, with red, spank marks on her ass and smeared lipstick all over her face. _Ahh, good times._

"Eh, Hawke?" Aveline asked, clicking her fingers and pulling her back to her senses. Lana shook herself awake and turned to the Guardswoman.

"Ok, fine," she relented, getting to her feet and stowing the tiny vial in her pack.

"Go straight home, Hawke," Aveline ordered, "No trips to The Hanged Man beforehand and no more quests until you have rested, got it?"

"Yes sir!" Hawke said, giving her a mock salute. Aveline rolled her eyes.

"Good," she replied, "I'll be watching you. I'll know if you don't."

"Thanks for the warning. See you, Av."

Hawke walked out of the barracks and re-entered Hightown. She strolled down the steps, side-stepping a few stalkers she had picked up in recent years and began to wander back to her estate absentmindedly. As she rounded a corner, she stopped dead. Isabela was approaching, arm in arm with one of the local whores. She was laughing and joking, dragging the woman into a nearby alleyway when her eyes found Hawke. Lana took a deep breath and made her way towards them, unable to go any other way (however desperately she wanted to).

"Hawke," Isabela greeted her, pulling her arm out of the whore's vice-like grip. "I...How are you?"

"Fine," Lana replied, a little hoarsely, "I'm just... going home."

"Visiting Aveline?" the pirate asked, grasping for a topic. Hawke nodded.

"Got a tonic to help me sleep," she replied, holding up the tiny vial of potion. Isabela smiled.

"I hope it's not anything like Worthy's mixture," she said, chuckling a little, "Remember the time we..."

Hawke smiled back, "I remember..." she said, trying to hide her sadness. Both women stared at each other for a few seconds.

"Ehh, Isabela. Shouldn't we...?" the whore interrupted. They shifted uncomfortably and looked away from each other, Lana's eyes dropping to the ground as she began to scuff her feet along the pavement.

"Well...It was nice to run into you, Hawke," Isabela said, breaking the awkward silence. "I'll...see you around."

"Of course," Lana replied, glancing up at her. Without further ado the whore grabbed Isabela by the arm again and sidestepped Hawke, who had taken to staring at the ground again.

"Who's that your ex girlfriend or something?" Lana heard the whore snigger as the two of them walked away. She heard a faint slap then.

"Shut up, Whore," Isabela scolded, "I don't pay you to talk, do I?"

With a regretful glance back at Hawke, Isabela then led the slut away towards The Blooming Rose and the two of them disappeared into the rapidly falling darkness, leaving Lana alone on the deserted street. She picked up her feet and made her way through the alleyway towards her Estate, trying not to let her emotions overcome her. _Well, why shouldn't she sleep with someone else? _She asked herself, _It's not like I own her or anything. _Even as she told herself she had no right to be upset with the pirate, she still felt a little hurt and angry. Reaching her Estate finally, she opened the door and let herself in, slamming it a little too hard behind her.

Bodhan came rushing into the hallway.

"Ancestors Serah Hawke!" he exclaimed, "You made me jump. Is everything alright, Messer?"

"Sorry Bodhan, everything's fine," Lana replied grimly.

"You have another letter from your sister," he informed her, holding it out to her.

"Leave it on the desk, Bodhan," she replied, not even looking at it, "I'll read it later. And hold all emergencies unless it's a matter of life or death for those closest to me. I'm going for a lie down. Can you make up this tonic for me?"

"Of course, Serah," the dwarf said graciously, bowing to her, "You go on upstairs, my dear, and I'll bring it up."

"Thanks," Lana replied, throwing him a tired smile. "What would I ever do without you Bodhan?"

The dwarf smiled at her and bowed his head again, rushing to the scullery to whip up the tonic. Lana trudged up the stairs and entered her bedroom. She took off her weapons and armor and threw a shirt over her nakedness, before climbing into her large four-poster bed. She closed her eyes, waiting for Bodhan to come. Suddenly a gruff voice interrupted her.

"Here's your tonic, Lana."

Hawke opened her eyes and sat up, seeing Gamlen standing in the doorway.

"What are you doing here?" she asked surprised. Gamlen entered her bedroom and sat down on the edge of her bed. He handed her the tonic. Lana took it warily and downed it in one. She placed the mug on the nightstand and lay beck down, waiting for Gamlen to speak.

"I...well I hadn't seen you in a while and..."

"What?" Lana asked, frowning, "You just thought you'd steal what little mugs I have left?"

"No, of course not," Gamlen snapped, "I brought the glasses back with me anyway. I only needed them because I had...company."

"Ugh! Uncle I don't want to hear about the whores you bring to your shack!" Lana exclaimed, cringing.

"That's not what I'm here to talk about," he said, "I just...Well, we're the only family either one of us has got left, and...I was wondering if you would, I dunno, come and visit me sometime?"

Hawke looked at him in surprise, not believing what she was hearing. If she hadn't seen her uncle's lips moving then she wouldn't have believe they had come from him.

"If you want something Uncle then just bloody ask for it," she said, feeling a little angry, "Don't try to butter me up."

Gamlen shook his head, "I don't want something," he snarled, "I just feel like I haven't seen you in years, that's all..."

As her uncle mumbled on, Lana felt the effects of the tonic fully kick in. Her eyes grew heavy and she fought to stay awake. _Gamlen being sincere is such a rare occasion. I'd hate to miss it._ Before she could stop herself, Hawke fell into a deep sleep in the middle of the conversation.

"...and I just thought your mother would have preferred us to spend more time...Lana?" Gamlen stared at her, realising she had just fallen asleep. He chuckled to himself, glad to see how peaceful she looked, free from all the strain she wore like a mask during the day. He pulled the covers up around her and leaned over, giving her a swift kiss on the forehead and silently apologising for the burden he had been ever since she met him.

"Good night, Lana," he whispered, feeling more like her uncle in that moment than he had his entire life. Seeing Hawke succumb to exhaustion like that made him finally realise that under all that bravado, under all the jokes and sarcasm, the heroics and the fame, she was still just a person like the rest of them. "Sweet dreams, dear," he whispered.

Gamlen got to his feet and extinguished the lamp on the nightstand before stealing one last look at his niece and then taking his leave.

* * *

Isabela woke up in a bedroom in The Blooming Rose. She turned to her left and saw with disgust that she had finally succumbed to her sexual desires and slept with a whore. _And Hawke had seen me with her,_ she thought, cursing her stupidity. _But what was I supposed to do? We can't even look at each other anymore. _Feeling ashamed, the pirate sat upright in the bed and sat on the end of it, feeling her throbbing headache and knowing she deserved worse. She glanced back at the whore in the other side and prayed that she wouldn't wake up. _The bitch wasn't even worth the coin...and I'm still thinking about Hawke. _It had been months since their last drink together. And not a day had gone by when she didn't think about what would have happened had she not brought that bottle of whiskey to Lana's Estate and forced them into a conversation that both had been wanting to avoid. Isabela knew the situation was her fault though. If only she could have plucked up the courage in that moment to tell Hawke that she loved her then she wouldn't have woken up this morning in a brothel bed with only a hangover and a passed out whore for company.

Sighing, the pirate got to her feet and began to dress quickly, wanting to be rid of her mistake and go back to the comfort of The Hanged Man. She reluctantly threw two sovereigns at Madam Lusine, the proprietor for The Blooming Rose (having ducked out of payment before and payed the price in a different way) and made her way out into the blinding, sunlit Hightown. As she walked through the streets, her mind flashed back to the scene with Hawke last night. The woman had looked exhausted. _And me having a whore on my arm couldn't have helped. _She hoped Aveline's tonic had worked for Hawke. _If it did I'll buy the Big Girl a pint. _As much as she and Lana were trying to ignore their feelings towards one another, unexpectedly meeting last night proved that they were both still hurting. The time apart had made it easier for them to be around each other without arguing, and in actual fact they had started having fun again, torturing Aveline and messing around with Varric and Fenris while on quests. But any kind of social gathering, like drinks or card games was out of the question. To the others, their relationship seemed to have taken a turn for the better. On the outside they were fine, on the inside though they were in pain.

"Captain Isabela, Sir?"

Isabela's thoughts were interrupted as soon as she reached her usual spot at bar in The Hanged Man. She turned around, seeing one of her sources standing behind her, though not the most trusting one.

"What is it, Lucky?" she asked, turning back to the bar and signalling for a drink. "Here to sell me some more bullshit?"

"Not this time, Isabela," he said, sliding in beside her. "You got your coin's worth this time."

"Is that right?" she asked, barely listening as she took a sip of ale. "Spill it then."

"The eagle has landed," Lucky said with a grin. Isabela turned to look at him then, hoping he wasn't say what she had dreaded. He looked pleased with himself.

"You're kidding me," she replied, her mouth falling open slightly. Lucky picked dirt from his teeth with his finger and flicked it to the floor, shaking his head.

"Maker's truth, Captain," he said, looking up at her. "There's no mistaking that ship. The dragon head at the front, black mast and the emblem of the Felicisima Armada. He's here."

Isabela reached into her purse and flicked a sovereign at the repulsive man before her in a daze. He caught it and winked at her before taking his leave. The pirate turned back to the bar then, feeling an unsettling sense of fear grip her for the first time in an age. This was it. This was what she had been waiting for all these years. Castillon had finally caught up with her, and there was only one person she trusted enough to help her kill him.


	32. Chapter 32

_Sorry for the delay. My laptop is broken :'( Enjoy!_

* * *

Hawke woke up the next morning and rolled over to find a tray full of steaming-hot, vegetable soup and a bread roll sitting on her bedside table, complete with a mug of chilled water. She smiled to herself and straightened up, making a mental note to purchase something special for Bodhan as a thanks for taking care of her so well. _That dwarf is the best thing that's happened to me in years. _She pulled the tray towards her, balancing it on her lap and began to tuck in, savouring every bite after what was undoubtedly the best sleep she'd had in Maker knows how long. The tonic Aveline had given her had done the job thankfully and she felt just about able to take Gamlen up on his visit request.

As much as she hated to admit it, the man was right. They had seen very little of each other in recent years, ever since Leandra's demise. But while the distance between them was both their faults, Lana was surprised her uncle had taken the first step at redemption and reached out to her, rather than the other way around. He was never one to mend fences, not unless there was something in it for him. _Maybe he really does want something from me. Knowing Gamlen that's always the case, _Lana thought to herself as she spooned the soup into her mouth. Despite her nagging doubts about her uncle's sincerity, she realised she couldn't really be choosy right now. Like it or not, she hadn't much family left. It had fallen to pieces around her, while she desperately tried to hang on to the remains. So if Uncle Gamlen wanted to repair their relationship then how could she deny him that?

Making up her mind, Hawke finished the last of breakfast and placed the tray back on the table before getting to her feet and making her way to the water closet. As she washed at the basin, her thoughts fell on Isabela. Seeing her last night with one of the local whores, seemingly having the time of her life without a care in the world made Lana question whether the separation between them really had done her good. Was she kidding herself? There was no such thing as out of sight-out of mind when it came to Isabela. When they were together, neither of them could hack it. But when they were apart, it was like a slow, agonising torture. _Maker's Breath, how did it come to this? _Lana thought to herself as she dried off with a towel. _We used to be inseparable. Now we're just...separate. _

As she made her way back into her bed chamber and began to dress, Lana decided to push Isabela to the back of her mind. She had done a good job at keeping her feelings contained these last few weeks, while the pirate dangled numerous whores in front of her and drank herself sober. There was no point dwelling on her every minute of the day. Isabela would do what she wanted. She always did. _And it's not like we're friends anymore anyway...Not really, _Hawke thought to herself as she made her way downstairs, fully dressed now. She thanked Bodhan for breakfast and grabbed her weapons from the rack, then walked to the front door. _Forget about Isabela, _she commanded herself, _It's not like I have to see her tod-_

"Isabela!"

Lana stopped dead as soon as she opened the door of her Estate. There, pale-faced and seemingly on edge was the very person she had wanted to avoid. Hawke's words stuck in her throat, caught off guard. She hadn't expected to see Isabela today at all, never mind almost walk into her the first step she took outside.

"Hey Hawke," the Rivaini greeted her, a faint, apologetic tone in her voice. Lana could tell she was remembering the company she had caught her in last night. They both cringed a little as the memory consumed them. Without waiting for her to continue, Hawke swiftly closed the door behind her and walked on as quickly as she could, praying to The Maker that Isabela wouldn't follow. To her dismay, quiet footsteps could be heard behind her as the pirate sped after her.

"Look Bela," Hawke said, before she could speak, not looking at her as she turned towards Lowtown, "If this is about last night then just forget-"

"It's not," Isabela interrupted, jogging slightly to keep up, "Though now that you mention it-"

"I said forget it!" Hawke said, cutting across her. She sipped down the steps into Lowtown with Isabela hot on her heels.

"Are you late for something? The Hanged Man is twenty-four-seven you know," the pirate asked, breaking out in a sweat as she tried to keep up with Lana's pace.

"I know," Lana replied, turning a corner.

"Or are you just that desperate to get away from me?" the pirate guessed, noticing Hawke was trying very hard not to look at her. "What's the matter?"

"You still smell like whore," Lana retorted before she could stop herself. _You're not supposed to be bothered remember? _"I'm going to see Gamlen."

"So, dumping one whore-smelling, screw-up for another?" Isabela asked jokingly, following her past The Hanged Man. "Look Hawke, I only need a second. Something big has happened."

"I already know about The Hanged Man's new ale, Bela," Lana replied barely even listening to her, wishing desperately that she had stayed at home. "Varric told me."

"That's not what I mean!" Isabela retorted, chuckling a little.

"Then can it wait?"

"Just stop a minute, will you?" the pirate asked, feeling a little frustrated now.

"I'll see you, Bela," Lana replied, waving her off absent-mindedly.

"Hawke just stop!" the pirate yelled, finally cracking. She reached out and grabbed her arm, pulling her back as Lana tried to rush off. It was almost painful for her being alone in Isabela's company. She spun her around against her will, face to face with the woman who had dominated her thoughts for years. They were both out of breath from the walk (or chase more like). Lana pulled out of Isabela's grip, unable to be that close to her without shivering. She was a little surprised that the pirate had went out of her way to meet like this, considering the time apart had been her idea.

"What?" she asked coldly, glaring at her, "What is so bloody desperate that made you camp on my doorstep then chase me all over Lowtown?"

"Wait, why are you talking to me like that, Hawke?" the pirate replied, even angrier now. "What in Andraste's Ass have I done now?"

"It's not Andraste's ass that you've been doing," Lana joked, though with a voice full of spite. Isabela blanched.

"I thought you said forget it!" she replied, frowning in confusion. Hawke exhaled angrily.

"Well I was lying, alright?" she yelled, "Maker's Breath Isabela, we're supposed to be keeping our distance from each other. Yet somehow I seem to run into you in the middle of the night with a dirty whore wrapped around your arm, and then first thing the next day when you still smell of her. How is that supposed to make me feel? _Tell me_, please!"

"Last night was a coincidence!" she said, her voice a little high-pitched with surprise," Please don't tell me you think I planned it!"

Lana groaned and ran a hand over her face. "No," she replied weakly, shaking her head. "Sorry, I'm just...not myself...Tell me what you want, Isabela, then leave me alone."

The Rivaini swallowed her anger. _Bigger things are at stake now than winning an argument. _She stared into Lana's tired, chocolate-brown eyes and exhaled.

"I..." As she stared at the irritated features on Hawke's face, her words failed her. Lana waited impatiently as Isabela shifted uncomfortably under her gaze, having second thoughts. _She doesn't care about me anymore. Look at her, she can't wait to get away from me...Maybe this was a bad idea._

"I'm not a mind reader, Bela," Hawke said, when the pirate didn't speak, "Tell me what's up."

Isabela sighed. "I...um...I need your help with..._something."_

There was genuine fear in the pirate's eyes. It was a fear that Lana had never seen there before. Isabela was normally so cool and collected, but this 'something' had definitely shaken her. Hawke stared at her for a minute, wondering if she should be really concerned. She sighed then.

"Fine, with what?"

"I...Well, I need you, Hawke," Isabela said, anxiously, "I mean...I suppose Varric would do but...No, it has to be you. You're the only one I can really trust."

Hawke's breath caught. _After all this time apart and I'm still her first choice? _Isabela was looking at her expectantly. There was a desperation about her that Lana had never once witnessed before, as though these were her final days. But as much as she wanted to help her, Lana was torn. She was painfully trying to get her own life back on track. Living in Kirkwall had run her into the ground and she was having to scrape herself up constantly and plough on through the rain, while ignoring the tragedies that plagued her. Only now had she finally allowed herself to grieve for things that had happened years ago. And yet despite this, there was just never anytime for herself. So when Isabela started saying things like 'I need you' and 'trust', Hawke could feel herself regretting she said she would help her, for fear of opening up old wounds when they were only starting to mend.

"I...Bela..." she stammered, swallowing hard, "I don't know if this is a good idea..."

"You're the only person who can do this, Hawke," Isabela said. She grabbed the front of Lana's robe with both hands, "Please," she begged, shaking her a little.

"Look," Lana said, covering the pirate's tightly clenched fists with her hands, "I want to help you Isabela...but..."

"But what?" the pirate asked, gazing into her eyes.

"You haven't even told me what you want help with," Lana replied. "You talk about trust, but you're still playing games!"

"Look, it's complicated," Isabela said, evasive. If Hawke wasn't definitely going to help then she didn't want her to know her business. _I have to get her to agree first...to see if she will. _"Just say you'll help."

"I can't go in blind, Bela!" Hawke countered, backtracking. She wondered why the pirate was so on edge. "Why are you being so secretive about this?"

"Why are you being so reluctant?" Isabela asked, frowning at her, "Can't you just have my back like you normally would?"

She could see the pain in Lana's eyes, see the conflicting thoughts as the woman tried to figure out what to do. A few years back and there wouldn't have been any question. Hawke would have been the first one to cut any bastard's head off if they threatened her friends. But things had changed between the two women, twisted and distorted so much that it was difficult to see what they were actually trying to hold on to anymore. And Hawke had already given so much of herself away. Surely she was entitled to keep a little for her own?

"I can't," she finally whispered, unable to ever imagine she could turn Isabela down for anything, "...I just can't, Bela...I'm sorry...If you don't tell me what this is about then that's my answer."

The pirate couldn't believe it. She simply stared at her, her heart sinking as fast as her last ship had. Her hands fell away from the front of Hawke's robes and dangled limply by her side.

"You know," she said bitterly, shaking her head and staring into Lana's chocolate-brown eyes, "There was a time when it wouldn't have mattered what I needed you for, Hawke...You were there for me, no questions asked. You always had my back."

"That was before you stabbed me in mine," Hawke replied, equally as bitter.

"And you forgave me for it!" The pirate spat back.

"That doesn't mean it never happened!" Hawke argued, "Ever since that day I make it my business to know what I'm getting myself into, to make sure it doesn't happen to me again...But for some reason you won't tell me what you want!"

"I shouldn't have to!"

Hawke snorted, "Is this a test, Isabela? A test to see if I will blindly jump through your hoops again like before?"

"Hawke..." Isabela breathed, a little ashamed at herself. But she had to be sure. She had to know if Hawke could still be counted on. _This probably wasn't the best time to try though, not with Castillon hunting me. _Her head dropped. Lana bit her lip. A raging battle was going on inside her head. But she had to put her foot down this time. She had problems of her own, lest everyone forget. There were currently no less than twenty-three families in Kirkwall right now who wanted her head on a spike for putting their mage sons and daughters into the Gallows, not to mention Meredith and her Templars and the fact that she was responsible for her sister and Ander's well-being. And now Gamlen was clawing his way back in too. There was only so much of her to go around. She couldn't take it anymore. Her little brother Carver had always wanted to be the hero his entire life. He envied her so much. But if he was alive now to see his older sister crumble he would realise that there was no glory in this, that what she had been telling him from the start was the truth. You either gave all of yourself to the cause, or you failed. _So I guess I've failed then, _Hawke thought as she stared at the look of defeat on the face of the women she excruciatingly loved. _I'm done._

"I won't help you anymore, Isabela," she said hoarsely, realising the pirate was indeed testing her. "I'm sorry."

"But...You're all I've got..." Isabela replied, in a whisper. Lana bit her lip again and glanced up at the sky, wondering what she had done so wrong in her past life to warrant the pain she had received in this one. She couldn't be someone else's lapdog anymore though. This was as far as it would go. There would be no more fumbles in the dark, no more reckless charges against unknown enemies. If Isabela didn't trust her enough to tell her what was really going on then she wasn't going to be used. She turned back to her.

"Well, you just lost that..."

Isabela winced, stunned. Hawke saw the effects of her words register on her face. She felt like shit for even saying them. Then something happened that she would have never have foreseen. For the first time ever, Lana watched a single tear fall down the pirate's face. Isabela took a few steps back, shaking her head. She couldn't believe it. She couldn't believe that Hawke had finally given up on her. Castillon would no doubt get his wish now. A whole Armada against one pirate meant she was screwed. Broken, Isabela sniffed, trying to pull herself together. She hated herself for crying.

"You know what, Hawke?" she asked harshly, her bitterness coming to the surface to protect her now, "I wish I'd never met you..."

She turned away and stormed towards The Hanged Man, trying to hold herself from falling apart at the seams. Hawke wanted desperately to shout after her, to tell her she didn't mean a word of it. But her decision was made. No matter how many times they tried to repair this relationship it was just going to unravel again. They were torturing and taunting each other. And it just wasn't fair on either of them. As she stared after the pirate, Hawke silently wished that she had never met her either. Life would have been so much simpler for both of them. Bracing herself, she turned around and made her way towards Gamlen's run-down shack for their visit.

* * *

Isabela pushed open the door to her bedroom in The Hanged Man and slammed it shut behind her, almost sending it flying off the hinges. She grabbed her head in both hands, feeling like she was ready to explode. Then she did. Flinging her arms wildly she flipped over her table in a fit of rage, sending the empty bottles smashing to the floor before burying her right fist in the door of her wooden cupboard, causing it to break with the force. A searing pain soared through her hand and she looked down, seeing her splinter-covered knuckles pouring with blood.

Cursing loudly she opened the broken cupboard and lifted out a bottle of whiskey. Taking more than a few swigs from the bottle, she walked over and sat down on the end of her bed, breathing heavily. _How could she do this to me? _She asked, beside herself with rage. _Why does it hurt this much? _She was used to people abandoning her by now. Her mother had done the same thing. When things didn't go her way she sold her only daughter off to a greasy, Antivan for a handful of gold coins. _But Hawke? _Never in an age did Isabela think there would come a day when Lana Hawke would refuse to help her. _Balls, maybe I shouldn't have tested her like that. Maybe I should have just told her about Castillon. After her, Hawke's loyalty has never been in question before, only mine...And she saw right through me there...But I had to see if she still cared enough. And clearly she doesn't. _Things really were about as bad for them now as they could be.

Isabela drained the last of the whiskey and threw the bottle at the wall, hearing it smash. She then searched in the drawers, finding some gauze to place over her bleeding knuckles. They were stinging painfully now and she would need them soon to break Castillon's face. She pulled a few of the bigger wood-splinters out before placing the gauze on top and holding it there. As she put pressure on the wound, the pirate glanced around at her now demolished room, feeling as though she would love to do it again. But there was no time for tantrums. Castillon was coming, she was sure of it. And if Hawke wasn't going to help her then she would have to help it herself. _There's no way I'm just going to roll over and been his bitch!_

Isabela jumped to her feet and tossed the gauze to the ground. She kicked aside the over-turned stool in her path and grabbed her golden daggers from the weapons rack at the door. _I don't need Hawke. I survived perfectly well before I met her. You don't become Queen of The Eastern Seas for nothing. _She swung the dagger in her right hand a few times, feeling the pain as she did so. But it would have to do. This was going to end now. She was tired of running. _Isabela is no coward! _Taking one last breath, she sheathed her daggers on her back and pulled open the bedroom door.

Varric was hovering outside his room with a contact when he saw the pirate pass, blood pouring from her hand and rage in her eyes.

"Rivaini!" he called, sidestepping his acquaintance and following her down the stairs. He had heard the news Castillon was in town and was looking for her everywhere, but by the look on Isabela's face she already knew.

"Leave me alone, Varric," she called over her shoulder. The dwarf raced after her.

"Don't do something stupid, Isabela," he warned her, seeing her scan the tavern as though looking for someone. The dwarf finally caught up with her. "Rivaini," he said, eyeing her warily, "You're starting to freak me out. Why don't you get Hawke to help-"

"Screw Hawke!" Isabela spat angrily, "That bitch can go blow Aveline for all I care."

Varric gave her a strange look. That was a lot of animosity even for Isabela. She had definitely lost it. Something must have happened between the two women again. Varric had never heard her speak about Hawke with such disrespect. Just as the thought entered the dwarf's head, Isabela lunged across a nearby table and pulled a rather disgusting-looking man over it, pinning him there. She bent over, holding him by the throat.

"Tell me, Lucky," she said through gritted teeth, "Tell me where he is and I'll just break your nose."

"What the-Get your effing hands off me you crazy bitch!" Lucky yelped, trying to pry Isabela's bloody hand from around his neck. The entire tavern was watching the exchange.

"Wrong answer," Isabela replied, before smacking him around the face with her free hand. There was a sickening crunch as Lucky's nose snapped. "Want to try again?"

"AH, Maker's Breath!" Lucky spat, his nose now dripping with blood, "All right! All right!...Bleeding heck!...Pull me up!"

Isabela squeezed his jaw and leaned down until she was an inch away from his face. "Where _is _he?" she demanded furiously. Lucky's face was turning blue from lack of oxygen. He struggled under the pirate's tight grip.

"Arghh...Look, I dunno alright? I swear," he croaked, his eyes wide with fear. "But his main man...Some Antivan bloke...Velasco I think his name is...he's...Blooming Rose, arghhh!"

Isabela released him roughly then and straightened up, dusting herself down and finishing off Lucky's ale.

"Always nice doing business with you, Lucky," she said sarcastically, giving him a cheeky few pats on the face and a smirk. "I'll be seeing you later."

She walked towards the door of The Hanged Man, ready to go and find Velasco, trying to think of the best way to play this. Velasco was a smart son of a bitch. This wouldn't be easy by herself. As she reached out to open the door she was intercepted by Varric.

"Rivaini this is crazy!" he said, holding his hands over the entrance, "Come on! Castillon's got a whole fleet behind him. Just sit down and we'll get a jigger of whiskey and play a game of Diamondback. What do you say? I'll even let you win!"

The pirate chuckled. "Sorry Varric, this has to end. And if Hawke's not going to help me then I have to do it my way."

"You'll get yourself killed Rivaini," Varric said seriously. Isabela looked down at him.

"I'd rather die on my feet with a dagger in my hand than cowering like a bitch with a dagger in my back, Varric. I'm just going to challenge Castillon to a duel and have it done. It's the only way to settle this."

At those words the dwarf's hands reluctantly dropped to his sides. He looked up at the pirate and exhaled.

"Let me come. We can play this a different way."

.Isabela shook her head. "There's no point in us both getting killed, Varric, but thanks for the offer," she walked past him and pushed open the door, exiting the tavern and rushing off towards Hightown. "Hawke was the only one who could help me...and she's turned her back on me instead."

"Let me talk to her!" Varric called after her, "Stop!"

Isabela reluctantly turned back. "No!" she replied angrily, "I can do this without her."

The dwarf raced after her, knowing that she couldn't. Hawke was the only one capable of bringing that bastard Castillon down and Isabela knew it. It was her pride getting in the way.

"Bianca would be heartbroken if you died, Rivaini. You can't do that to her," he joked, catching up finally. Isabela chuckled a little.

"Fine!" she yelled, glancing back over her shoulder at the trusty dwarf, "Come on then. There's pirate's to kill and revenge to be had. And we wouldn't want to deny Bianca the chance to get her trigger fingered."

The two of them chuckled and made their way through Lowtown as quick as they could. Isabela had no idea what was going to happen when she ran into Velasco. But she wasn't going to flee any longer. If Hawke had taught her one thing over the years, it was that running away from your problems never solved them. It was time to face the music.

* * *

Hawke sat at the table in Gamlen's home, waiting for him to finish making them lunch. She tipped back the last of the mug of ale he had given her, thinking back to her encounter with Isabela. The pirate was definitely in some kind of trouble. Even though she was trying to hide what that trouble was, she couldn't hide her fear, not from Hawke. But it was the pirate's actions which had angered Lana more than anything. Testing her loyalty like that was just uncalled for, and the secretiveness made Hawke suspicious, causing her to change her mind about helping her. _I'm not running into another Qunari fiasco like last time._

Even though Lana knew it was for the best, she couldn't help but feel as though she had made the wrong choice by breaking her ties with Isabela. _And she cried...she actually cried in front of me? _Lana had never seen Isabela look as vulnerable as that. It broke her heart. The woman always seemed to be in control of her emotions. She was always shut down, always kept feelings locked away so she wouldn't get hurt. But it appeared Lana's harsh words had been the key to unlocking them. _And now I feel terrible._ Hawke ran a hand over her face, trying to wrestle with her guilt. Isabela's departing words had torn her apart. _Did she really wish she'd never met me? _Feeling her eyes burn with tears, Hawke leaned her head back against the hard wooden chair and exhaled, staring up at the numerous objects on the wall behind her.

Suddenly her eye caught something. Tucked in a tiny nook, behind what appeared to be a very large mallet was a piece of paper. Curious, Lana straightened up and got to her feet. She approached the ornament on the wall and stuck her hand in behind it, feeling the cool, dryness of the paper grace her finger tips. She pulled the rolled up paper out and unfolded it, beginning to read.

_Bill of Laning_

_Smetty's Fish Guttery_

_Crate 1023_

Confused, Lana read again, feeling as though she had missed something. She turned the page over, expecting there to be writing on the other side but there was nothing. Gamlen returned to the living area then with cheese sandwiches and two more mugs of ale. Lana held up the note.

"Uncle, what's this?" she asked, her eyes narrowing.

"Oy!" he said, trying to snatch it from her grasp. Lana was too quick for him though. "That's nothing to do with you!"

Hawke slapped his hand away. "What's this about Gamlen? And why was it stashed behind that giant hammer thing on the wall?"

"That's not a hammer! It's a wallop mallet...I used to play. About the only thing I was ever any good at."

"The note, Uncle! What is it?"

Gamlen sighed and began pacing. "I dunno," he said, scratching his head, "Someone gave it to me when I was searching for...well this gem I've been pursuing for years."

"What gem?" Hawke asked, interested.

"Oh, nothing!" Gamlen snapped, angry, "I've given up on it now so I never followed up on the note. I lost enough searching for that precious gem...Now can we sit down and talk about something else?"

"The rabbit stew's burning," Lana said, gesturing to the stove in the other room. Gamlen jumped to his feet at once.

"Maker's Breath, I'd forgotten about that!" he yelped, running to check on it. He began to stir the pot. "So, you've done well for yourself," he called, sparking up conversation from the other room. "I had my doubts the first time I saw you but...Well, I guess there was something to that Hawke fellow Leandra ran off with after all. He certainly produced an amazing daughter. For what it's worth I'm proud of-Lana?"

Gamlen heard the front door close and rushed into the living area to find it deserted. He cursed to himself, hoping and praying that his niece hadn't just abandoned her visit and ran off in search of the gem he had given up all the Amell family's riches and everything important to him looking for.

* * *

Isabela had never felt this nervous entering a brothel before. Normally her heart was light and her head cloudy (from all that she had drunk). This time though, even with Varric at her side, her hands were clammy and there was a cool sweat breaking out across her forehead. She really regretted not being straight with Hawke before. It would have felt much safer with her around. _But she doesn't care anymore...and I can do this on my own._

"The usual, Serah?" Madame Lusine greeted her, gesturing to a line of Isabela's usual choices of whores. _Or as they were now known: "Something-to-take-my-mind-off-Hawke."_

"Not today, Lusine. I'm here for someone," she replied, seeing the look of disappointment on the whore's faces. They loved the enthusiastic, adventurous types like Isabela. And she always had the coin to back up her 'ideas'.

Varric grunted beside her. "So," he began, scanning The Blooming Rose, "How are we going to find this son of a bitch? I assume you know what he looks like?"

"Of course," Isabela replied, throwing him a grin, "I bet the prick's upstairs, sampling the many splendours of The Blooming Rose with, well, his other prick."

The dwarf chuckled. "Let's go pay him a visit then. Though I'm not sure how much use I'm going to be to you. Even if this plan works, how am I supposed to find you? I know squat about tracking people. You really should have just asked Hawke."

Isabela groaned as they made their way up the staircase to the private bedrooms.

"I did. She doesn't care Varric," she replied, avoiding his eye.

"And you told her it was Castillon? You told her he was in town for a visit?" Varric asked sceptically. The Hawke he knew would never leave her friends in that kind of danger, no matter how much history there was between them. Isabela shifted uncomfortably. Suddenly the realisation hit Varric. "You didn't tell her did you?"

"I told her enough," Isabela said defensively, "She refused to help either way so it makes no difference whether she knew about Castillon on not."

"Oh, Rivaini," Varric groaned, "If she'd have known it was Castillon there wouldn't be any question."

Isabela's jaw tightened. She silently disagreed, not wanting to face the truth. Hawke had abandoned her. That was the real truth. _And I don't need her anymore._

"Just be quiet, Varric...and make this believable."

"Do you remember who you're talking to?" he asked, amused. Isabela chuckled.

"Oh right, the best liar in all of Thedas. You know, I always wondered why we got along so well."

The two of them giggled before they finally reached Velasco's bedroom door.

"How do you know it's this one?" Varric asked, looking up at Isabela. She smirked down at him.

"Because it's the best room in this place, and Velasco thinks of himself as pirate royalty," she replied. Varric looked impressed. He tied her hands together and dragged her down onto her knees.

"Then let's knock and see if he's home," he said, rapping loudly on the door.

"Remember, don't be afraid to hit me," Isabela whispered, hearing loud footsteps approach the door. It swung open. Isabela glared up at the greasy man standing over her.

"Well, well, well," Velasco said in his Antivan accent, glancing from Isabela to Varric with a satisfied grin. "Look's like someone's been a bad girl. Get caught with your fingers in someone's treasure again Isabela?"

"Get caught with you fingers up your ass again?" she countered, smirking at him fearlessly. Velasco raised an arm and back-handed her across the face. She groaned and toppled over onto her side, tasting blood in her mouth. _Oh, he'll regret that!_ Varric started to laugh.

"Well, saved me having to do it," he said, looking down at her, "But just for good luck." The dwarf swung a boot and kicked Isabela hard in the side then. She cursed under her breath and glared up at them both.

"Bastards!"

Velasco snorted.

"Castillon will be pleased," he said, gesturing for his men. "He's been looking for Isabela for some time."

"How about a token of his appreciation then?" Varric said, holding out his hand. "One business man to another." Velasco laughed.

"Of course," he reached into his pocket a produced a few sovereigns, "Three gold ones...It's more than she's worth, believe me."

"Pleasure doing business," Varric said, pocketing the coin happily. "That bitch will think twice before she steals again."

"She won't get the chance," Velasco answered with a deadly finality to his tone. Varric tried to hide his shudder of fear.

"Take good care of her," he joked, leaning against the door frame casually.

"Oh, we will," Velasco answered, chuckling evilly. "Don't you worry."

Varric watched him follow after his men, who were dragging Isabela behind them by the legs. He could see her grimace as the staircase dug into her spine, one by one. The entire Rose looked on, confused. Isabela winked back at the dwarf before the Felicisima Armada pulled her out of sight and the front door to The Blooming Rose closed behind them. Muttering broke out at once amongst the whores and their clients, surprised by what they had just seen. Varric cursed under his breath and leaned over the balcony. He hoped desperately the trail Isabela left to find her and Castillon would be easy to follow. If it wasn't, there was no hope. She was as good as dead.


End file.
